I went upstairs to look for the picture frame that Hobi had given me last year on our wedding anniversary. I opened the walk in closet and opened the large box, that I still haven't opened since I moved here. I find a box cutter and tear away at the box until it finally opened. I take out the frame and read what it says
"I Jung Hoseok, promise to love you for all of our days. I didn't fall in love with you because of your inner and outer beauty but because of your heart and soul. Your imperfections, your dedication, and passion for what you do are what makes me love and appreciate you everyday. Each gift that you give me, will always be placed in my heart. No matter how angry, sad, upset or depressed I become I will always love you. Even if or when I hurt you, just know it's because no one can describe the pain I have to tell you how much I love you. You fell in front of me and I caught you but for me I fell for you because you caught my heart. Everything I do is because it's all for you"
Hot tears started flowing as I held onto the frame against my chest. I couldn't do this anymore. I was still in love with Hobi and willing to get him back, regardless of the last confrontation with Alex. I was willing to forgive Hobi and try to work things out so that we can work on perhaps getting married again. Every time a memory of him came up, my heart ached more and more each day. I didn't want to divorce Hobi, I wanted to divorce the stranger he became. I can't marry Taehyung because my heart still belonged to Hobi. I quickly get out of the closet and looked through my purse to find my phone. I sigh in relieve as I grab my phone and turn it on, but because my phone didn't charge at all last night, I couldn't call Tae. I put my phone on the charger and sit at the edge of the bed, tapping my right foot vigorously as I waited.
Every minute felt painfully slow. I walked downstairs to grab something eat and drink to calm my nerves. Each gulp of juice felt like I was swallowing a rock and every bite of this apple felt like I was about to break my jaw. I paced the apartment back and forth, hoping and praying that I'll get to Taehyung in time.
About an hour and a half had passed and I head upstairs to check on my phone. I was feeling rather relieved to see my phone fully charged and unlocked it. I froze at the 15 missed calls from an unknown number and five voice mails. I scratch the back of my head and call the number, hearing the phone dialing and then suddenly clicking.
"Y/N!! Is that you!" A man with a deep voice shouts
"Y-Yes this is Y/N! Can I asked who called me la-
"It's me, Namjoon!" He says loudly against the phone
"Namjoon-ah!! Oh my god it was you calling me the whole time!" I saying half crying and half yelling as I sink on the phone, laying my head against the bed.
"Tae had left his phone unlocked while we were in the hotel room. I looked at it and saw your name on the contacts and that's how I got it. I tried calling you earlier but I we already had to go to dinner with a few guests. When I went to check where Taehyung was, he was gone. We've been calling you for the past five months noona! We've been calling you since you left!" He says in a worried tone
"You have? B-b-but why?" I say choking on my tears that now started dropping down my face
"We were shouting out for your name as you existed the party but you were already gone! PD tried calling you, Soonmin, the staff tried, even Hoseok, noona!"
"What? Everyone? Hobi called too?" I say in shock
"Yes, Y/N! Hoseok has been calling you every single day wondering where you are so that he can tell you what he's been trying to tell you! He tried calling your parents but they didn't know where you were and he called his and they didn't know either. He's been crying and begging for you to come back to him. He's been so depressed that he can't dance right or even taking proper care of himself. He still loves you, YN!" He says desperately.
"What do you mean, Namjoon? I thought he was falling for Alex. I thought he signed that divorce papers and handed them in to the court hou"
"He never signed it noona! He took the paper and shredded it and tossed it in the trash. He even sent you a video and picture showing you proof! He knew you still loved him noona and he was willing to proof it"
I drop my phone to the ground out of pure shock and denial. He never signed the paper? How is that possible if Tae showed me a picture of it signed by him? Did he forge his signature to make it look like Hobi's signature? Tae's been lying to me the whole time?
I can still hear Namjoon's voice coming from the phone and I pick it up to tell him know I was still there.
"Y/N I know what Tae's has been doing. He's in love with you. He has secrets of his own that he himself is afraid to admit to you. Out of the goodness of my heart please talk to Hoseok. Tae maybe in love with you but he's still in love with someone else who had broken his heart and has seen you as the missing piece he's been trying to get back. Tae's is a good person with a good heart who's still hurting and doesn't know what he's doing, so I ask that don't continue what the two of you been doing because it'll only hurt you and him even more"
"How can I forgive myself Namjoon? If you had known how many times we've slept to-"
"I understand noona! But you were vulnerable and not yourself. You didn't know that you were cheating because he's been hiding the truth from you. Hoseok really wants to see you and talk to you so that he can tell you the truth"
"But Tae proposed to me Namjoon! And I said yes without thinking! What am I supposed to do? How can I confront him without hurting him?" I cry out
"Noona tell me your address so I can pick you up and I'll take you to see Hoseok" He says as he runs towards the stadium door.
I tell him my address as I open the draw to find my old phone, that was still fully charged and in still in good condition "Namjoon, what about Tae? I still have to tell him the I can't marry him?"
"Well in order for him to move on he's going to have to keep facing heartbreaks until he finally realizes that he can't use someone to replace his broken heart. Love is out there, he just have to let it find him and not force it. But first I want you to talk to Hoseok" He says as he steps out the door. I can hear the members calling for Namjoon and I ended up crying even more as I bring myself in siting position on the bed.
"But what about the rehearsals Namjoon?"
"PD knew that you would call so he said it was OK to work on rehearsals when things get situated. With Hoseok still being this depressed the show won't run smoothly unless he sees you" He says in a soft tone as he gets in the car with Soonmin.
"I'm so sorry Namjoon. I'm so sorry" I say, wiping away my tears
"Gwenchana, noona. Everything will be fine. We'll see you in a few" He says sweetly and hangs up
I let out a frustrated and tearful sign as I lay back on the bed and open up my old old phone. The first thing I saw was 150 missed calls from Hoseok, 115 voicemails messages all left unopened and unread. I click on the first two voicemails I laid my eyes on and with shaky hands put the phone against my ears.
"Jagiya! Please answer me! I never meant to hurt you in anyway! Please forgive me! I'm begging you!"
"Jagiya! Please! I need you to listen to me so you can hear the truth. Please call me!"
"Where are you jagiya? I'm miserable without you. I miss you so much it hurts. My heart is broken without you You mean the world to me and the last thing I want to do is hurt you. I want nothing more than to see my wife again and have forgive me for any wrong doings. I still love you and I always will no matter what. I just need you"
The last voice mail was from yesterday. Even just listening to three my heart still stung at the sound of Hobi desperate pleads and cries. The sound of his lowly, shaky and desperate voice was enough to make me cry and wallow in my bed. I click on the message that Hobi had sent me the day I left Korea. It was him in the music studio alone with no music playing in the background. He was wearing a plain white oversize t shirt with blues jeans and hair slightly messy. He had the divorce papers in his hands and a paper shredder next to him.
"Jagiya. I'm showing you this video to proof that I still love you. Alex and I never had feelings for one another. I'm sorry you felt the way you felt and you had every right to me angry with me. I hurt you when you needed my help, I hurt you when I left you alone on the living room couch every morning and night. I'm sorry for everything, jagiya. But this divorce papers mean nothing to me" He puts the paper in the shredder and they're all cut until it mixed in with the other paper work in it. He then takes out the ring, that I gave to Alex, and hold it in his hand "This ring only belongs to you. No one else because I married you, not Alex, not the staff, no one. Only you because I love you" And the video cuts off.
I close my phone and put it back in the drawer and slam it. My body was shaking from the overwhelming emotions that ran through me. I felt weak, disappointed, angry, sad and slightly over joyed that Hobi never stopped loving me. Although I told myself I didn't, this whole time I still did, but I was too busy fighting it off with Tae. But I felt betrayed because of Tae's dishonesty. But like Namjoon said I have to break his heart in order for him to move on but...how?