After we said goodbye to Tristan Joel, my brother Charlie his best friend Alberto and my mom all got in the car to head to Pizza Hut. When we arrive there Joel and I are sitting next to each other and across from us is my brother and Alberto with my mom at the head of the table. After a while, my mom is talking to my brother, and Alberto Joel leans over and asks, "what is going on between you and Tristan." "I don't know Joel; he makes me feel giddy inside." "Trin I don't like this. He has just started school here, and he has glued himself to you." "Come on Jo Jo. We are just friends." "Yeah, maybe but I think he wants to be more." "Yeah, right Jo Jo I am not the type of girl guys like in that way." "Come on Trin you know I have always thought you were hot. I just don't like you like that."
I shake my head. "Then why have I never been on a date and the only guy to ever kiss me was you. So that you could see what it was like to kiss me." "Shhh, do you want your mom and Charlie to know about it and find out it was in Mr. Plas's classroom." He places his hand on my thigh and rubs it up and down. "No, but don't worry about Tristan it not as if he likes me that way." "He wraps his arm around my shoulder and pulls me into a side hug. "You know I will always be here for you, right." "Yeah, I know same here." After a while, my mom asked what was going on, and Joel and I looked up and said, "nothing."
After dropping off Joel at home, Alberto came to spend the weekend with us as usual and while I was outside reading he walks up and sits down next to me and says "I heard what you said at dinner tonight. You have to stop putting your self down, big sis." "Lil' Bro come on no one ever asks me out." "That is because a lot of the guys think you are dating Joel and he doesn't contradict them." "What do you mean?" "When guys ask him if you are his girlfriend he doesn't tell them you two are just friends. Sometimes I think he does it on purpose because he doesn't want anyone else dating you." "Oh, well he is not happy Tristan has been spending time with me." "Yeah, I know I heard, but he needs to let you have a life." "Are you sure?" "Yep, I am sure Trin if Tristan asks to spend time with you alone do it." "Well, he did at the Math and Science club stargazing party next week." "Then do it." "Are you sure? I mean no one has ever shown that interest in me maybe they only ask him because he dates other girls." "Trina, you need to be happy. If Tristan asks you out again and you are interested as I said before just do it." "Thanks, you better get in, or Bubba brown will wonder where you are." "Nah, he won't he is in the middle of playing Super Mario Brothers." We both laugh, and he takes off." I lay there thinking about how much easier it would be to live in one of my books. Where I do not have to worry about a male friend sabotaging my life. Yet, in some of my books, there is someone seeking revenge on the heroin because of a
On Monday when I got out of the car, I saw Tristan waiting. Joel huffed and took off. I shook my head and walked up to Tristan. "Hey, Trin how are you doing this morning?" "I am good and you." "Well, I thought we could talk." "Sure, what's up." "Look I heard something this weekend that I want to clear up." "Ok, what's up." "Are you and Joel dating I know I have asked you this, but one of the guys on the team told me you were, but another one said you weren't." "We aren't it is just that we are always together and I guess because he gives me massages plus we are always off whispering to each other, and we have fallen asleep together with my head on his chest." "Ok, because I would like to spend more time with you." He smiles at me and slips his hand into mine. I look up at him as he holds my hand and I can't help but smile back at him "I would like that as well Tristan."
I never realized how much people believed Joel and me were together until I walked into my first-period class and Tony came bounding up and asked "Hey, so you and Tristan" He waggled his eyes at me. I smacked him and said, stop it. "Ah come on Triny, I know he likes you he asked me a lot of questions about you this weekend." "Wait you were one of the guys who talked to him." "Yep, and I told him you and Joel are just friends. That the whole Joel is your boyfriend was just a rumor because he doesn't want you dating." "I don't know why he is dating that girl from Mayson County."
"Yeah, I know but have you ever noticed all the girls he dates are from other schools. Never here and the only reason I know is that you tell me." "Oh, I never thought of that." "Yep, Tristan wasn't sure about accepting what I said until I told him I had known you longer than Joel. That you are always at my neighbor's house since they are your relatives and we grew up together." "Thanks, I guess I am going to have to talk to Joel about things." "Yeah, maybe deep down he does like you but is afraid to tell you." "Yeah, right maybe it is more along the lines that he knows...you know..." "oh, that's true rumor has it..." "Hey, don't tell me rumors ok." "fine but you do know all the gang wants you to stay pure Triny." I laugh, "great, so you all talk about my lack of sexual knowledge." "No, we just told him we expected you to stay innocent." "Do you realize how much I hate you right now?" "Yep, I do, but you won't hate me forever you never can." "Who's says I can't stay mad at you?" "Simple you have not been able to stay mad at me for more than a day. Plus why would you be mad at me for not wanting you to turn into one of the whores of the school? You are a great girl Tina you deserve the best. You deserve a guy that will treat you like a princess as I do Jade." "Yeah, Jade is a very lucky girl to have you. Even if I think dating you is just plain gross." "Not Funny Trina."
After class started, I thought about what Tony had said and wondered if maybe Joel liked having a real girlfriend and liked the guys here believing I was his girlfriend here in school. I also wondered if maybe he was trying to keep me pure until he felt comfortable enough to try and cash in my v-card, I mean it didn't take him long to kiss me when he found out I had never been kissed. All I kept thinking was now I understand why the guys in our group are always telling me he is not good enough for me and that my crush on Joel needed to end. They would introduce me to guys all the time. Now they would chase off guys they thought were not good enough for me. Every single one of my buddies felt I deserved a guy that had more than half a brain. I just don't know if I am ready for a real romance I have lived in my books for too long. The only problem I am having is that if what am I feeling is real Tristan is starting to make that happen. It was him I dreamt about last night kissing me not Joel. I know I said the kiss Joel and I had last year didn't mean anything, but I was lying I couldn't tell him it was magical when he told me he wanted to be just friends.
How could I tell my best friend I was in love with him especially after he said it was just a kiss. I learned the hard way telling a male friend that you are in love with them will only make them ignore you in the long run. I have lost many friends because I developed feelings for them it didn't matter to them I was willing to just be friends. I don't know what to do about Tristan. If my Aunt Brenda was still with us I know she would have sage advice for me. Unlike my mom, that is all girly Aunt Brenda wasn't and she understood why I would be nervous about liking a guy and having him like me back. Then to add to my confusion Joel can't seem to let me live my life. He acts as if every guy that tells me high just wants to have sex with me. You should have seen the look on his face when Nathan as a practical joke gave me a condom. Boy, I thought he was going to kill poor Nathan.
I still do not understand when my feelings changed for Joel but lately, I am starting to realize I have not been in love with him for a while now. Maybe it was Tristan to finally open my eyes. The best thing about Tristan is he doesn't treat me like a girly girl but at the same time, he treats me very sweet. Just this morning he held my hand while he walked me, class. No one has ever done that to me before. Granted everyone was staring and I did get a few glares from girls but I don't know if him holding my hand was him being friendly or his way of saying he liked me as more than a friend. Alberto did say that I should give him a chance no matter what. I guess I will have to see where this is going.
If Tony thinks I should give Tristan a shot as well I can't help but follow Alberto's advice as well. Alberto has been a part of our family since he and Charlie became friends in middle school and I love him like a brother. He has admitted that he loves me like an older sister so, he would not encourage me to allow a guy into my life if he thought the guy was out to hurt me. Plus what I told Joel is true I need to grow up and learn from mistakes. I am not saying that dating Tristan is a mistake. Wait where did that come from I am actually thinking about dating Tristan. Hell, I am even thinking as if we are dating. I need to stop and actually pay attention in class.
For the rest of the period, I sat there repeating the french words Madam Garcia had us repeat. I don't know what I am going to do when I leave this class today I am pretty sure everyone is going to be talking about the fact Tristan walked me to class. Hell, they are doing it right now since Madam Garcia is talking to someone at the door. I hear Martin "how do you think Joel is going to feel when he finds out Tristan walked Trina to class holding her hand." I soon hear Oscar "why would he care he is not Trina's boyfriend even though he as all you dorks believing they are together. He is dating a girl from Mason county. He just doesn't trust you yahoo's with her. Plus we told him if he dated Trina he couldn't sleep with her or else. Especially since he has a bunch of girls in Mexico he bangs." Just then the bell rang and I was still trying to come to terms with what I just heard as I step outside the classroom.