Chapter 6: “Jackie Chan’s with man- vaginas”
Lexi’s P.O.V
“Get up you piece of shit!” A voice yelled while smacking me hard on the leg. A sting pain stayed on my leg. That bitch five star me.
“Shut up Mel,” I growled cuddling further into my pillow. When the hell did my pillow become so hard? Haha hard…
“Who’s Mel?” A new voice asks. Huh, I swear I’ve heard that voice before.
“Her little sister,” Another voice told him. Shit is I hearing things? I am not going to a loony institution, I’ve watched American Horror story.
“Alexis Lee Devine!” Another voice joined in.
“God is that you?” I asked sitting up so fast I felt dizzy. Am I dying? Is this what it feels like? I thought my life was supposed to flash through my eye. This is bull poopy.
“Yes I am totally God,” A male voice answered statically. I rubbed my eyes trying to take the sleepiness away. I turned around to see Batman rolling his eyes as he glared at me. My eyes narrowed at him.
“Do you even believe in god?” I retorted rudely. I crossed my arms. He’s such an anger bear. Personally I would never go camping in the woods with Batman. He might turn into a bear and if he does I’m more than likely his first target.
“I don’t wear this cross necklace for fun do I?” He asked before climbing out of the van. Call me weird but even since I watched the Fast and Furious movies I find guys who wear cross necklaces like Dominic Toretto (A.K.A Vin Diesel) a total turn on. He’s just so hot! I’d let him go all bear on me.
“Lexi’s getting turned on,” Justin teased. I turned around and flipped him off. Haha take that you son of a dick!
“Lexi put your figure down we are at Target,” Justin said while hitting my hand with force. I started to rub my hand and made a face at him before looking around at my setting. Yes we are at Target and it is fucking hot out.
“Why is it so hot?” Ta complained. Julia and I nodded with her.
“We’re in Florida!” Justin screamed, jumping up and down like a boy watching his first porn movie.
“Why are you so happy?” Julia asked grumpily as she tried combing through her tangled hair with her fingers.
“Cause we get to see my parents,” He said still jumping up and down. All the boys started to make their way to the entrance with us girls following. “All of you girls get fifty dollar to buy shorts, shoes, tops, girl’s thing or whatever.”
“Only fifty dollars?!” We all yelled. “Hundred.” We’re not cheap hoes. We’re a little on the expensive side.
“Fuck no!” Luke yelled his eye bulging out of there sockets. He looked like he was about to have a heart attack.
“Well Batman told me money wasn’t a problem, so give us a hundred each,” I said, smirking, while looking Batman in the eyes the whole time. Batman kept eye contact with me the whole time while handing everyone one hundred bucks.
“Buy hair dye,” Batman ordered before walking away. We all shrugged and began to walk off. I smirked at them before walking over to where the shorts, tanks, and bikinis are. This is going to be fun.
We girls went off in a different direction then the boys. We all looked at each other having the same question stuck in our heads. How do we get out of here? Even though it had been fun with the boys this still isn’t right. I personally would like to see my parents again and apologize even though I shouldn’t be the one staying sorry.
“We need to get out of here,” Ta said angry.
“But how?” Julia asked.
“They’re going to find us. The day we got kidnapped when we went to the first hotel Jason said something to me. He might have mentioned that there was a reason why they kidnapped us. We were not random unlucky shit heads,” I told them in one gust of breath. They all stared at me astonished.
“They are in the fucking mafia!” Julia shouted waving her arms around, “Of course they’re going to find us.”
“We leave when we get to Justin parents’ house,” Ta said. I could tell she had a plan mixing up in her evil head. We all grinned at each other and starting shopping.
In the end I got four pairs of shorts with eight tops, two bikinis, and four pairs of shoes. When we got to the box dye Ta had a fit. She just dyed her hair red and she warned that color for the past six years. So she grabbed black since that was close to her natural. Julia and I basically switched colors because she got brown and I got blonde. To be honest I didn’t know how well the blonde was going to work since my hair is dark brown.
Right now we’re at some gas station getting into our new cloths. I picked white short shorts with a white shirt that has PARTY ON, written on the front in cursive. Couldn’t really read what it said but that was the point. I think. I put on my black conversers AKA the best shoes invented. Apparently when we get to Justin’s we are going to dye our hair so the police don’t find us again. In a way I’m fine with it. I was blonde before, but Ta put up a good augment about her hair. Actually she still is bitching to Henry about it.
I walked out of the bathroom, putting on my new sunglasses that I made Henry buy me. I flipped my hair over my shoulder smirking at the teenage boy behind the cash raster. I saw his eyes skim my body. That dumbass doesn’t stand a chance. He doesn’t even look like he’s hit purity.
“Hey baby,” He said trying to sound sexy, but sounded more like a cow taking a crap on marble floors.
“In your dreams boy,” Batman said while walking in and putting his arm around my shoulders, pulling me in and kissing me on the temple. I don’t know if I should scream rape or hit him in the ball. “Go with it.” I gave a slight nod of my head to tell him I heard him.
“Hi baby,” I said while biting my lip.
“Lookin’ good,” He said looking me up and down. I played it cool on the outside but on the inside my heart was beating so fast I felt like I was going to throw up. Why is he so hot?! I’m going to melt.
“Thanks sweetheart, you look adorbs,” I told him, and I wasn’t lying, he looked sexy as hell in his white tank top that you could trace his abs and red shorts. Damn, this boy will be the death of me. He dragged me out where everyone is waiting away from the blushing boy. I could see Luke trying to get close with Julia but she laughed and pushed his shoulder. Someone feeling flirty.
“Hey dude,” Justin said while wiggling his eyebrows suggestively at us.
“In his dreams,” I repeated Batman’s words while smirking. He dropped his arm and crossed them over his chest.
“Boobs!” Julia screeched. All of our heads snapped over to her. Luke has her pinned against the truck holding her arms above her head. Luke shook his head slowly before he leaned into her, whispering something we couldn’t hear. Telling by Julia’s face and Luke’s smirk, it wasn’t good. If I could place a bet on who getting laid I’d pick Julia. Her and Luke will be banging like hungry bears.
“Ok since Luke and Julia are getting hot over there they get to be together,” Justin started. Us girls gave him the crazy look.
“What do you mean together?” Julia asked, spitting the word together out like poison.
“Since we are staying at my parents we need to have a cover story,” He explained. “So each girl will become someone’s girl.” He looked around seeing everyone’s faces in horror. “Don’t worry, fake dating. But you will have to sleep in the same room. Ok so where was I, Jason and Lexi, your together. That leaves Ta and Henry.”
“Wait where is Ta?” I looked around frantically.
“Right here,” She said. I looked behind Julia to see her walking over in red short shorts with a black tight sleeveless shirt. I looked closely at her and I could see that her lips are slightly swollen. That whore! Please tell me it wasn’t with Mr. Purity boy.
“You were making out with someone?” Henry asked. His eye brows are raised and I could tell he was trying not to laugh. Who was she getting with? Is everyone being a whore except me? This is not fair.
“Maybe” She said shrugging. “You all look like you want to throw up.”
“You have to fake date Henry,” Julia said.
“What! Why?!” She shrieked. I cringed back at her high pitched voice. She’s a screamer Henry in for it.
“Cover story” I answered. “What about you Justin. What are you going to do? Be a loner with a boner?”
“I have a girlfriend already,” He answered smirking. How?
“Does she know the real you?” Julia asked smirking. I could already see the evil wheels turning in her evil but clever mind.
“Actually, yes. She’s in the mafia with us,” He answered lazily.
“Wait ya’ll are in the mafia!” Ta shouted. All of us girls stood in shock while they nodded yes. Well this is just fucking nice. I’m dating a mafia boy.
“That’s fucking awesome!” Ta shouted. Her grin was as big as the ocean. Hey I want to see an ocean while we are in Florida.
“So you all are like Jackie Chan’s with man- vaginas?” I asked.
“Actually yes,” Henry said smirking.
“No.” Batman said. “I got a dick and as you being my girlfriend should know.” I could hear the smirk in his voice. He winked at me and I wrinkled my nose. Gross fucker.
“Henry you’re a boob,” Julia stated.
“Am not! Girlfriend tell your friend to stop being a fuck tard,” Henry argued.
“I’m not your servant,” Ta snapped at him.
“Yes you are,” He said getting into the van.
“Well fuck me than,” She mumbles.
“In Justin’s parents mind we have millions of times,” Henry said smirking.
“Great,” she said rolling her eyes. We all climbed into the van and made our way to Justin’s parents’ home. This should be a piece of freaking peaches.