Bella's POV
The sick, wet plopping into the toilet bowl seemed to egg on the incessant stream of puke that I was producing. My head and lungs burned, my body felt like it had been hit by a truck, and my szőlő grew wild trying to escape the pain that clung to my skin.
Vampire bites always took a heavy toll on me. It was a struggle to stay quiet, so that Charlie would remain ignorant that I'd tried to tango with the walking dead as of late.
As I wiped my mouth with the back of my hand, I wondered at how much easier my life would be if Charlie could just know what I am. It would be so convenient to just be able to say, "Hey, Charlie, about my last few months of being a total zombie, it wasn't entirely as shallow and as immature as everyone thinks..." or even "Charlie, I've gotta head out and practice some fighting in the woods, not doing drugs." Yeah, any interaction even remotely resembling that would just be plain peachy. We could be close again like when I was little, no secrets. But unfortunately, full disclosure with anyone would mean I would have to leave Forks for good and would have to go back. Which I would never allow to happen. Ever.
The wolves of LaPush finding me was probably as lucky as I would ever have it. They understood what it meant to keep a secret and suspected enough to where I could be myself. No more acting and a little companionship. Time with Jacob, my sun. That's what I hoped to get out of maybe getting to know them all better. Despite the outcome of a fresh bite and this horrendous setback with Charlie, it felt worth it.
Back to the Charlie situation ... to say he was angry was an understatement. I'd faced death on countless occasions, and I swear I find Charlie angry, no disappointed, a million times more distressing. I wanted to be the normal, happy child he wanted so much, but it seemed as though a higher power had other plans predestined for me. It sucked.
A lot of smooth talking from Billy and a testimony from Sam Uley had mitigated the damage as much as possible. The official story was that I had been fed up with thinking Jake was in a gang and that I finally decided to confront them all directly with the help of Quil, who was also conveniently shut out by the pack. Quil had picked me up after I had snuck out and we'd stormed Sam's place together (The addition of Quil excused the presence of my car in the driveway. ). And in order to storm said place, there'd been a barbwire fence involved.
Never before had my elaborate "klutsy human" ruse been more useful. It had been a mannerism cultivated when I was young carefully by Renee, who'd known that those of my kind would have considerably more scars than humans. Much like how great whites were covered in battle scars, it was our way. The klutz game had always resulted in sugary rewards from Renee, and I'm sure I would've had at least ten cavities by now if it had been possible to get a cavity.
Thanks to this habit, my severely scratched arms had been bandaged by Sue after Sam had caught me and Quil trespassing. We had been promptly taken to Billy, who'd informed all parents of the incident. Despite the trouble I was in, it was good to see Charlie trust Billy again. Any suspicions he had about "tribal secrets" were on hold as I explored the possibilities of criminal trespassing. Sam Uley telling Charlie that he wouldn't press charges and only asking that I join in on their LaPush community service projects from now on had cleansed any ill thoughts that my father could've possibly had.
After all, I would be getting out of the house and being punished in a constructive way. I was happy with that particular arrangement, but it didn't mean I'd gotten away totally scot-free. It turns out Charlie was far more capable than I had ever anticipated even in my wildest dreams. The madman had taken my books.
I had turned to books when Jake had joined Sam's crew to pass the time. Many years had been the accruement period of those volumes and it was difficult to sleep without reading a chapter now. It was an outlet that I had never thought I would have to do without.
Sometimes it was difficult to not punt Charlie back to the police station because of the brutality of the reprimand. My legs were always my strongest feature, and maybe the thirteen miles distance could be achieved with some training. But I loved him, and he was definitely in the right in the context in which he had taken the books.
I still didn't deserve it though. My childish alter ego bickered with the rest of me.
My body rested pathetically on the floor as the incessant nausea tried to simmer. Cold tremors racked up my body.
The sound of the toilet flushing stoked it back up to full flame.
Paul's POV
Distance was rattling my nerves as I fought not to run to the Swan's residence to get close to her. She needed space and so did I. Bella needed it because she'd told us she'd be sick and grounded for the next couple of days. Myself because I was freaking out.
I was mated for life. To a girl of half of a species I didn't even know. She seemed the reserved type while I was a bit of a party boy. She probably had coitus with a vampire. I wasn't even comfortable smelling a vampire. Our bond that was the sole reason that I was drawn to her was strong enough to fuck me up, but not enough to lose myself enough to not care about the little details. (Which, by the way, is not normal for an imprint pair.) Yeah, everything seemed a little out of wack.
"Paul, quit worrying, it'll be fine." Emily chastised me gently as she slid a muffin towards me.
I bit into the muffin haughtily and squinted my eyes at my motherly friend. She lifted a regal eyebrow and proceeded to serve the remainder of the batch out to my pack brothers. I wanted those guys gone so I could confide in Emily. She was the smartest and calmest, and I trusted her implicitly. More so than even Sir Alpha.
How do I know this? The girl was my number one backer on going to college even when I turned into a werewolf. I'd be lost without her. She'd fought Billy, forced Sam to stand up for me in front of the Council, and even co-signed on my loans to ensure my future. I didn't have parents anymore, but the big sister I had in Emily was more than enough.
Jake laughed loudly at something Embry said. It was awkward with the kid. He wasn't even close to accepting the bond between me and Bella, particularly because of its strength. When Bella would start hanging with us in the next couple days, I had heard his plans through the pack mind to have her so thoroughly distracted she wouldn't even glance at a fucker like me.
They weren't too shabby in all honesty.
I wasn't sure I wanted to fight those plans. Bella deserved someone less broken than me, even if it was a cocky little boy who didn't even see her correctly. That incident with the leech biting her would've scared anyone, different species or not. If it would've been one of us, we would be dead, our mortal enemy's venom being our literal kryptonite. She had shown her bravery, and that trait alone made me unworthy of her.
My self-pity was interrupted when I realized that the room was clear and Emily was looking at me with her big, wide browns. She sat on the bar stool next to me, clearly indicating that I had to spill my guts out.
"This is so damn confusing." I blurted out roughly.
"Not really. At least she's not dating anyone and you're not dating her cousin. And she knows about you and didn't freak. She also can handle herself from what Sam told me, so you probably can't give her a face like mine without some real effort. As far as I can tell, all the major possible problems have been addressed. Now you two just need to find out what you are to each other."
The calm delivery deeply contrasted the heightened flood of shame it caused within me. "Spirits help me, I'm sorry, Emily. I'm such an insensitive dick."
Emily had an amused glint in her eye and her smile tugged charmingly around the scar to show straight white teeth. "Yeah, but that's why you're one of my favorites, Paul. You never even flinched when you first saw my face even before you were a wolf, no other has displayed that ability to accept things the way they are. I've tried to tell Sam to go easier on you."
The idea of Sir Alpha going easy on me created a deep rumble of laughter I couldn't contain. I sobered quick. "Not a single wolf in the pack approves of me being with her. Black particularly."
Emily gave a scoff and made a silly face. "Well, when's the last time you've shown them you can care for someone other than yourself, Paul? They hear your thoughts and know you look down on them for not wanting to go to college, not to mention how few ties you have to anyone. You're judgy and then again not in the oddest ways, sweetie. If I was a wolf, it'd be almost impossible to be in your corner. As for Jake, can you blame him? He loves her."
I nodded in agreement and mulled the new insights over in my head. Never did I let my deep feelings cross into the pack mind where it didn't belong. I was the asshole I had to become to protect myself when I was young, only on the inside as well when I was in wolf form. It suited me just fine until now, when suddenly their opinions on Bella and me mattered.
"What should I do?" The question was all I had left at this point.
"Well, that doesn't have an easy answer, really." Emily tapped her chin thoughtfully. "Just get to know her and quit worrying so much? Maybe let her sort things out with Jake first."
I definitely didn't like that last part and it showed. Emily laughed. "If it's a true bond, which I think it is after what Sam told me, then let her figure it out herself. It'll be hard to get her mind off you."
That part, I liked. My lips curved mischievously and the darkness must've shown because Emily frowned.
"Well, I probably shouldn't have said that part. Poor Bella." She sighed dramatically.
I couldn't contain my laughter. I had a great idea on what to do now.
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What's Paul going to do? It doesn't seem like it'll be anything good...
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