Chapter 4
She was shaking harder every minute that passed and the front door didn't open. I wanted to laugh at that. It's what she deserved. Hopefully, her husband would divorce her once he finds out that she has a daughter. A crazy daughter that was already 17 years old. I was shaking as well at the thought of him getting here and finding me. Not shaking out of fear like my mother. Shaking out of excitement to see what he would do about it. My guess: leave the bitch.
Then again, if he stayed, I was somewhat certain she wouldn't beat on me like she usually did. Now that there was someone else here in the house, she might be a little more cautious with her actions despite the fact that she told me she would hurt me later.
But after thinking about it, I would much rather have the dude leave her. Even if it meant a much worse beating for me. It would be worth having Clare be beyond pissed if he left her.... She would be crushed and if her heart was broken, it was worth a beating to know she was suffering. Besides, it didn't matter. I would be out of here by tomorrow night.
Though it was a shitty day for obvious reasons, it was turning out to be a great night as I watched my mother sit on the couch, shaking and thinking of what to do or say to him. It was a beautiful sight. She said nothing to me in those minutes and it was the first time I saw her on edge like this. And since she wasn't beating me at the moment, I decided to take that time and look around my house. Or rather, what was my house remodeled.
Walking through the door, the first thing I noticed were that the floors were wooden instead of the bright ugly orange carpet we use to have in our living room. There was new furniture. Leather black couches with a comfortable looking leather chair that was set up around a pretty glass coffee table, facing a large screen TV. Behind where the furniture was set up in the room was the familiar staircase that came down into the living room. That was left the same but really, what could have been changed or redone about the staircase. Removing it or replacing it? Maybe taking down the railing?
The walls in the room were a pale blue color with pictures along the walls of beautiful landscapes, framed in black that matched the couches and chair. From where my mother sat on that couch, I scoffed lightly and moved off to the left where I knew the kitchen was.
The kitchen had new... well, everything. Instead of wood in here like the other rooms, the floor was a white pearly tile. And sitting on this tile, along the farthest wall, there was a new refrigerator. Counter tops, cupboards, and a stove too - which shocked me because Clare is too lazy to cook to even bother buying a new stove. And if her husband was anything like her - which he probably was - he wouldn't make anything to eat on that foreign looking machine. I frowned at the long knives that were in the block next to the microwave and cringed, bringing memories to the surface of my mind.
Since the kitchen was rather large, we usually just had our kitchen table in here and so was also our dinning room - whenever we actually did eat in here. Usually, I would just cook for her and take her food to her in the living room while I would either eat in my room or occasionally at the table quietly. Except back then, we had the smallest wooden table you could imagine. Now, there was a long dark brown wooden table with four chairs set around it, the window behind it lighting up the room. The only thing the same was that it still had the semi-decent paint of a light yellow around the kitchen.
Oh yes, I have a conclusion already: step-daddy was rich or had enough to at least impress Clare. Yeah figures; I knew she didn't marry out of love. She had none to give. Money was an obvious big factor.
Leaving the kitchen and back into the living room where my poor poor mommy sat, I turned and went down the familiar hall. Where the same pale blue paint as the living room lined these walls too in a colorful contrast to the kitchen. Walking down the hall, I noticed at the end was the small bathroom that I noticed was left untouched. Probably the only spot in the house based on what I saw thus far. There was still the same ugly vinyl floor that was peeling along the edges where it met the wall. The old sink was still there, the drain black with mold. The bathtub needed to be replaced as well but I figured that by now, gullible new husband ran out of money with how much was already spent on fixing up the house. Either that or they just didn't get to it yet. After all, I was only gone for a year. They must have been married and moved in together for only a few months. And in those few months, it's obvious a lot has been done already. There might be more to come.
After I went back into the living room, Clare was ready to hurt me. Usually I can sense evil from her baking under her skin. But this time, I knew from her face. It was evident she was really pissed. Her small brain must not have came to that decision until now since all she had been doing in the minutes prior was sitting and thinking. But now, she was on her feet and staring at me, giving me such a look of hate. There were a few tears around her eyes and I smiled at the sight.
She strode forward, moving closer to me and when she got to me, she raised her hand and slapped my face hard. And with the contact of her hand, it seemed to advertise her personal bipolar problems. She went from spazzing and scared to pissed off devil woman. She most likely realized the reality of the situation. Not how sad she was or worried... but the results from all this. And to her, when hubby finds out, it won't be good.
Thankfully though when she slapped me, I didn't stumble back like she probably figured I would. By now, I was use to this with her and was especially prepared today (even if the last time I saw her was over a year ago). Though sudden, I knew I shouldn't have been caught off guard by the incident. She only had so much time to get her anger out on me before this guy gets here.
"I didn't think you were dumb enough to come walking back here. Things were going good without you. Now, I regret not killing you when I could and burying you with your sister! I should have. When you disappeared, I started over. I got married and started a life without you. Then, look at what you did. Do you really love me enough to come waltzing back in here? I thought I made my feelings for you very clear."
I groaned. Sometimes, I wish she had just killed me a long time ago. "I wasn't trying to come back. I was just passing through to the next town. I was caught nevertheless. There is nothing holding me here to you, especially love. Who could love you?"
She gave me a smug look. "My new husband."
I scoffed, crossing my arms as I rolled my eyes. "Congratulations. You were able to lie your way into a marriage. All he loves about you is your acting skills. I know over the years you have come to be really good at it."
Her cheeks flushed a furious red and she backhanded me again but this time it didn't really bother me all that much by now. I was shaking with fear earlier because I assumed she would really hurt me - more than ever before. Because in the past, I got use to what she had done to me and what to expect on the streets. I was scared a few hours ago from thinking she might beat me to the point to where I actually have brain damage. I even secretly thought she might kill me. Because I knew she wasn't afraid of killing me, considering she did it before. But now, seeing that Clare had a husband living here, I knew she wouldn't kill me. And she wasn't beating on me much now. I needed to be presentable to my new daddy when he gets here.
I wasn't as scared as I was before. But I still knew better than to fight back. Standing before her pissed off form, her face red with anger after she just hit me, I prayed for her new hubby to walk in at this very moment and see what a princess Clare really is.
"Now, he will be home soon. He doesn't know about you. Doesn't know I had a kid. And all you need to do is be yourself. As in tell him everything about me and nothing will change. Because he will believe me when I tell him you are insane over you." She scowled at me.
I sighed. Jesus, it's as if she didn't think I already knew that. Throughout my whole life that was the case. It didn't matter what I said to him, didn't matter what I did. Because he wouldn't believe me. Why would he? I could tell him horrible things about his new wife and Clare would be fine with that. She didn't care what I did because she knew he wouldn't believe me.
She sighed, walking away from me and turning towards the front windows next to the door. Looking out them, she sighed, still worried.
"Do you really love him?" I asked, really curious. And this wasn't me being me; I honestly wanted to know. I mean, she never loved me I don't think but she once loved my father. It was a pathetic love, even before he took off.
He left Clare to handle me on her own. And though pathetic, they did put an effort in. Which isn't an excuse anyway.
They tried to make it work. Tried raising a baby at the age of 15 and they did fine I guess for that little while. They were married soon after but a year later, he left and I never saw him again. Which didn't bother me but it killed Clare. She loved him and once he left, she despised him with all of her being. She began to despise me for the fact that I was part of my father. She saw him every time she looked at me because of how much I looked like my dad. That's when she started to hate me.
I think that was the only time she ever loved someone like that. Just my father for that little time. Of course, I suppose when they were together and tried raising me, she could have loved me. When dad left, that changed. But the point is, she loved even if for that small amount of time too. She never bothered trying to love my sister though considering the man that got her pregnant with my sister was out of the picture - maybe even before he knew he knocked up my mother. No money from him or anything because he was long gone. And by the time she found out she was pregnant with my sister, it was too late to get an abortion. I suppose to her it wouldn't matter anyway. She finished the job a few years later.
Yeah, my mother wasn't much of a loving woman. But maybe she loved her new husband. After all, she use to love my father. Maybe she found love again though. Being the weak and pathetic bitch she is though, I prayed he would divorce her the second he finds out.
She just looked at me as if my question was entirely stupid. "Obviously I love him. I just don't love you."
I faked my hurt. "Ouch, mom. You sure know how to hit me in a sore spot." I said, knowing for a long time she hated me.
Looking out the window at our gravel driveway, I watched her roll her eyes at what I said. But a minute later, they seemed to glaze and grow into globes. With those wide eyes, I knew what was coming. Her breath caught. "He's here," she whispered, voice breaking. I heard the sound of crunching gravel beneath the moving tires of a car and I saw moving light spread across the room quickly through the windows from the headlights of the car.
Oh, this was going to be good. Time to sit back and watch the show! I have't been this excited for a long time. To know that in a minute I would possibly see Clare's life she built up without me go down the drain. It will also be interesting as well in witnessing this husband realize the truth. So in other words, yes. It might turn into the best day of my life - which was saying something about how incredibly exciting my life was.
"Go in the kitchen quickly," she said, looking to me in a panic after the sound of a car door slamming reached both of our ears.
"Why? You going to try to hide me? Kind of late to start a brainstorming session," I said, smirking.
"You know what I'm trying to do. I need to talk to him and try to semi-warn him before he just walks in and sees you!" She said, walking swiftly to me and grabbing my arm, dragging me towards the kitchen.
"Sorry to burst your stubborn bubble, my perfect mother. But I don't think you can warn him about this. There is no gradual acceptance. He will either hate you and leave you or hate you and leave you. No sweet talking your way out of this one. I'm so sorry."
She started pushing me towards the kitchen more but it was too late according to the sound that hit my ears in the same second. At the squeak of the front door swinging open.... A smile lit up my face and Clare and I shot a glance towards the door and the man that walked through.
Like I said before: this might turn out to be the best day of my life. Now, it was I realized when my eyes met his as he walked through the door and looked to Clare and I. At first, all I could do was stare in my frozen state. That's all we could all do. Luke stared at me, unsure of why I was here and just wondering in general why his night seemed to never end, I was sure.
I wasn't sure what to think. I mean he... he married her? But he seemed like such a nice guy for the most part when he arrested me and later questioned me. It became evident at that moment at just how good of an actor Clare was if she was able to snag a man this... normal and nice. And no less a police officer.
I burst out laughing, recalling what I said when he arrested me. Jokingly, I asked if he had problems with the wife.... Ha. Wow, that was such an understatement I realized now. "I guess you really do have problems with the wife," I told him as I pointed to his wife and my mother.
This was great. I couldn't wait to see what he would say. I smirked, looking at him as he stared at me with a confused look after I said that. He finally was able to look at Clare's scared and worried expression. Yeah. You better be scared bitch. My new rich daddy was here and he is finally going to see through your ugly stupid mask, I wanted to tell her that but didn't need to. She knew she might be screwed over big time now.
"Clare...?" He said, unsure at what the nutcase he arrested earlier was now doing in his home. Whoops, my mistake. Our home. "How do you know her?" He asked.
I couldn't keep quiet, not when there would never be an opportunity like this again. "Don't worry, dad. If you are mad at mommy, you and I could always play," I said, biting my smiling bottom lip and raising my eyebrows in suggestion.
Looking to Clare, she shot daggers at me and she gave me a look as if she were trying to burn me with her eyes. I wouldn't be surprised if she could though. She was a monster and, my guess, the devil's mistress. Because the devil was probably the only one that wanted her besides this poor clueless man.
I looked to Luke and saw he looked at me with a confused and strange - and a somewhat disgusted - look. Like he didn't want to believe I said that or he just didn't understand what I meant by it. And I can't blame him because how could the first guess be that I'm his stepdaughter. No, he was trying to think of other reasons I were here. Reasons that were much more reasonable.
"Clare, what is she talking about?" He finally asked, his voice expressed in monotone.
She sighed, approaching him and took his hand. He looked down at her, eyebrows dipped and eyes even more droopy. He was really tired and all he wanted was sleep by this point. Even better. He was most likely more grumpy than usual. Maybe he would hit her. But unfortunately he didn't seem like that kind of guy no matter how tired or stressed he was.
"Come here," she lightly whispered, tugging on his hand and towing him towards the black leather couch. I smiled as I went to go sit down in the chair, knowing she didn't want me here when she told him this but guess what? I didn't care! She deserved this and I deserved such a night as this one after so many shitty days and nights in my life. She made him sit on the couch next to her and when she saw I was sitting in the chair, smug and comfortable, she politely asked me, "Albany, do you think maybe I could speak with him alone for a--"
I cut her off, smile bright on my face. Just as politely, my voice nice like hers, I said, "No, I don't think so. In fact, maybe I should be the one talking here," I smirked and looked to Luke. He glanced to me, confused and tired and just wanting to go to bed. I really did feel sorry for him. He didn't deserve to be lied to like he has been by her. He didn't deserve this stress or me here to bother him. He didn't deserve what I said next but really, I couldn't help it. Because even though it sucked for him right now, this was a rare night for me to feel happy at my mother's misery. I wasn't ready to give up that pleasure yet.
"Unlike Clare, I care about telling the truth. So I will. I am Clare's daughter." I paused. "Don't worry, Luke. I feel just as bad about that fact as you do."
I watched his reaction and raised my eyebrows at seeing there wasn't one. Just that common blank face. Then... very slowly, he turned his eyes from me and looked at Clare. I could feel the excitement in me rise. Oh boy. It's sad to know my life was such a drag that this is what is bringing my mood back up. Poor innocent mommy. It couldn't get any better than this.