"I'd go anywhere with you."
The feeling of arms wrapped around me when I awoke was foreign and I stiffened as soon as I felt them. Harry's head was resting on my chest, his hands resting gently over my stomach. Our legs were completely entwined, and as I tried to gently move away from our position, he subconsciously tightened his hold on me.
And as I looked down at his face, features soft and boyish with sleep, everything from last night came flooding back to me and I felt a surge of anger ripple through me before I was abruptly pushing away from Harry. As soon as I had shoved against him, he woke up, his grip immediately loosening on me enough so that I could get up from the bed.
He sat up, looking rather sleepy as he pushed his messy curls away from his face before eyeing me. "Are you okay?" His morning voice was deep and husky as he rubbed at his eyes slightly.
I should have been able to say yes, but I would have been lying, because I wasn't okay. In fact, I felt angry. So angry, that my stomach was twisting with fresh nausea and--
I just barely made it to the bathroom before the contents of my stomach came rushing out of my mouth. I hated throwing up. It didn't feel good, nor did it taste good, not to mention the fact that hanging my head over a toilet bowl wasn't exactly fun.
As I bent over the marble, I felt my hair get pulled up and a large hand began to rub soothing circles along my back. This continued until I had vomited all that my body was able and I sat back on my legs, feeling thoroughly disgusted with the taste in my mouth, paired with the fact that Harry had just witnessed me puking.
He bent down to flush the toilet before helping me stand up and leading me to the sink. I shakily rinsed my mouth out with water before brushing my teeth meticulously twice. Once the sour taste had been replaced by a minty one, I washed my hands and then headed out of the bathroom, my gaze falling on Harry who was laying on my bed, doing something on his phone.
He sat up when I entered the room, his gaze meeting mine. "Are you okay?" he asked quietly.
I wanted to nod, say yes, and tell him that morning sickness was a normal occurrence, but instead I found myself replying with a quiet "no", and Harry immediately raised his eyebrows. "Do you feel sick still or--"
"No," I cut him off. My voice was oddly calm and level, quiet despite the anger surging through my veins. It wasn't expected, this feeling, but I knew the reason behind it. I timidly walked forward, stopping just in front of Harry who was now seated on the edge of the bed. He tilted his head up to look at me, leaning back on his hands as he waited for my explanation. "You... you make me feel sad."
Harry frowned, evidently not expecting my vague description of how I felt. I was struggling to explain though, therefore I opted to just wait and hear what Harry had to say, which came only seconds later.
"I make you feel sad?" he repeated questioningly. "How?"
"You slept with another girl." My voice was barely a whisper, and I felt almost childish admitting that this made me feel so horrible inside, because in reality, I should have expected it. I should have been able to understand that five months was apparently too long for a guy to go without sex. Or maybe I was reacting the way I was supposed to, but I felt like I shouldn't be getting upset at Harry considering he was drunk when it happened. Either way, I couldn't just ignore the fact that I was suddenly very sad.
When Harry didn't reply, I decided to elaborate. "You-you went, and you got drunk, and then you slept with someone else and I just... that hurts, Harry." I looked up from my shaky hands to meet his dark gaze. "I'd been here this entire time, trying to figure out how I was going to take care of this baby alone... trying to figure out how I was going to survive without you... and you're just going out and getting drunk and..." I took a deep breath before stepping aside from Harry and climbing onto the bed, going as far as the pillows before I buried my face in them.
My words were so jumbled that I probably didn't even make sense to him, but I guess it didn't even matter. Harry couldn't take back the fact that he'd went and slept with some random girl, and I couldn't try and make myself feel better about the situation.
I felt the weight shift on the mattress beside me before a large hand was trailing gently down my spine. "Look at me, Alice." Harry's voice was deep and low and I reluctantly turned my head to find him resting his chin on his hand, his face just a few inches from mine. His hand moved back up my body before his fingers brushed my dark hair away from my face, tucking the stray pieces behind my ear.
"I'm so sorry," he whispered, eyes searching mine as he quietly spoke. "I knew that when I told you, you would be upset. It was actually a bit surprising to me last night that you were so accepting of it... I don't know how to make it right by you, but if it helps anything, I really don't remember it at all and as soon as I woke up and realized what I'd done I was so disgusted with myself... I left immediately, and well, that was actually the first time I got back into contact with the boys."
My eyes widened with this new information and I turned fully onto my side to face him. "Really?"
He nodded. "I sat around for a few days, wondering how in the hell I was going to figure all of this out, and then I just picked up the phone and called Louis. He was furious with me at first for even bothering to talk to any of you, but slowly that wore off and I got into contact with all of them... they told me how you were doing, aside from the baby, obviously."
"What would they say?" I whispered curiously.
"That you were dealing with things well." Harry paused. "A few times Louis would mention that it had been a rough night, but you always got through it... did you cry a lot?"
I nodded silently, confirming Harry's suspicions, and he sighed heavily as one large hand moved to cup the side of my face, his thumb gently stroking my cheek. "I did it to protect you," he breathed. "I would have never left if I had any other choice..."
"I know that," I mumbled. "But I thought that when you left you were doing things, I don't know,important, not sleeping around." I paused, taking in Harry's stony expression and dark eyes. Despite his obvious irritation with what I said, his fingers didn't cease their soft touch and I took that as a sign to go on. You never told me what you were doing while you were away, or why you're even back."
Harry stopped then, his eyes narrowing. "You never asked."
"I'm asking now." I didn't like how sharp his tone was or how defensive he was being. I think I had the right to know what he'd been doing with himself for the past five months and why all of a sudden it was okay to return. Maybe staying in the dark about it would have been better, purely because then I could just live in this blissful contentment that Harry was home, but I'm a curious person.
Harry groaned as he sat up and ran a hand through his messy curls. "It's complicated," he muttered out in frustration.
"Harry, don't give me that," I complained as I, too, sat forward. "Just tell me why you're here at least. I need to know something. It gets so damn tiring being in this house with everybody knowing everything except for me! I'm just this little, ignorant, pregnant nuisance that waddles around wondering what the hell everyone is talking about and nobody bothers to involve me in any conversations! Do you know how frustrating that--"
I didn't expect Harry to cut me off, especially with his lips. This would be the third time now that we'd kissed because I was ranting and he wanted me to stop, and I froze against him, eyes wide as he gently pulled away, his face hovering inches in front of mine. "You're incredibly hot when you're angry," he mumbled.
I should have been pushing him away and demanding that he give me the answers as I so desired, because in all truth, I hadn't received any yet, but instead I found myself wrapping my hands around Harry's neck and pulling his mouth back to mine. He didn't hesitate in prying my mouth open with his tongue and I shuddered at the feel and taste of Harry, my entire body feeling as if it had been submerged in a burning fire.
Harry was so addictive, and I hated it. I knew that by kissing me, he was going to be able to avoid the questions I had fired at him, yet I couldn't find it in myself to stop, especially when my hormones were all over the place and Harry's legs were entwined with mine, his hands ghosting over my butt before he gently cupped the cheeks, pulling my body closer to his.
I couldn't help but moan into his mouth, my entirety tingling as Harry began to trail his lips down my neck, the feeling of his tongue against my skin having me shivering in his's grasp, but it seemed that without his lips touching mine, I suddenly regained some reason and sense.
I weakly pushed at Harry's chest. "Stop," I breathlessly spoke. Harry complied almost immediately, though he seemed incredibly reluctant to do so. His eyes were filled with lust, and I knew that he most definitely didn't want to halt his movements. He seemed to be restraining himself as he stared at me, waiting for the reason why I had made him stop.
"Tell me why you're back," I whispered. I ran my fingers along Harry's face gently, hoping that the tender touches would persuade him to just give me the reason why he was back, but his entire body tensed, his eyes hardening into a dark glare. "Please," I added, frowning. "I have a right to know, Harry."
Harry groaned, the frustrated sound accompanied by him rolling onto his back and releasing me as he stared up at the ceiling. I studied the side of his face for a moment, taking in the way his lips were slightly pursed, his features morphed into an annoyed expression.
"Are you angry with me?" I asked quietly.
"No," he answered instantly, his gaze still trained above. "I'm angry with this situation... it's complicated and stressful, and I know that you want to understand, but it's not that simple."
"Make it simple."
Harry chuckled bitterly. "I wish."
We laid for awhile in silence, and based on Harry's expression, I could tell that he was thinking about something. I sighed, settling down onto my back beside him. I felt a bit nauseous after throwing up but I was hungry at the same time, and then I was confused and sad and irritated because Harry refused to give me any information. It was too much to handle, yet I still felt the need to do so.
"What are you doing?" Harry grumbled as I sat up. I ignored his question as I carefully placed my legs on either side of his lanky torso, resting my weight against his hips. He gazed up at me, his eyes flitting between my own stare and my hands on his chest.
Harry's eyes widened when I abruptly rolled my hips down into his, a throaty groan released from him as I repeated the action a second and third time before leaning down to whisper in his ear. "Tell me why you're back," I breathed.
Harry's hands landed firmly on my hips and he guided them back down to meet with his again, his eyes glazing over with lust, but I pulled away. "Nope," I shook my head. "Tell me why you're back first."
Harry narrowed his eyes as he realized what I was doing, but I merely grinned at him before sprinkling kisses along his collarbones, which earned a hum of approval from him before my lips hovered beside his ear again. "I can be persuasive too," I mumbled.
Within seconds I was on my back again, but this time Harry was above me, supporting his weight with his arms and legs on either side of my body as he peered down at me after he was sure that he hadn't hurt me when he'd flipped us over. He bent down, his lips ghosting over my jawline before he nibbled delicately at the skin. "As sexy as I find your persuasiveness," he whispered against me, "I'm still not telling you... it was a good attempt though."
I sighed in frustration as he leaned up to stare down at me. "This isn't fair," I mumbled.
"Life's not fair," he answered simply.
"Why won't you just tell me?"
Harry gazed down at me silently for a few moments. He seemed to be contemplating something as his nose twitched slightly, his pink tongue slipping out to wet plump lips. I instinctively bit my bottom lip in response and I saw him quirk an eyebrow at me before he rolled us over again so that I was on top of him, our faces inches from one another.
"As soon as I tell you why I'm back, there's going to be a lot of explaining to do, and a lot of things to go through," he spoke quietly in my ear. "It will happen eventually--it has to--but for now, I just want to be with you without worrying about any of the finer details, okay?"
My eyes widened. Here I was, thinking that Harry was back with some chaotic, horrible reason, and that was why he refused to tell me what it was, when in reality he just didn't want to have to deal with whatever it was at the moment. He was going to tell me, but for now...
"Okay," I whispered back.
Harry raised an eyebrow as he leaned his head back to look at me. "Really? You're just going to agree that easily?"
I shrugged one shoulder. "That's a valid reason for not wanting to tell me," I explained. "As long as you're planning on telling me why in the future, I'm happy."
"That was easy though," Harry mumbled, his gaze narrowing on me. "A bit too easy."
I sighed as I rolled off of him to lay on my back again. He entwined our fingers between us, squeezing my hand gently in his in some form of encouragement to elaborate why I hadn't pressed him on the matter.
"If you want to wait to tell me, I'm okay with it," I began, pausing to think over my next words. "If you plan on telling me later, that means that you plan on staying, at least for a little while. I think I just want to make sure that you're not going to just disappear one day... that thought terrifies me."
"I'm not leaving, Alice," Harry said quietly. "Look at me." I turned my head to find him gazing evenly at me already. "If I go anywhere, you're coming with me... that is, if you want to of course."
I felt like some sort of small promise was laced into his words. Harry wasn't going to leave me again, and if he was forced to, he was going to make sure that I was by his side when he did. I tentatively leaned forward, Harry meeting me halfway as our lips gently pressed together in the sweetest of kisses. It was brief and short, but perfect all the same as I pulled away only slightly, Harry's nose rubbing gently against my skin as Harry leaned his forehead against mine.
"I'd go anywhere with you."