Harry was walking down the hallway, putting up the blocks in his mind when his concentration was again interrupted by Neville Longbottom.
"Harry!" he said, huffing and puffing as he caught up to him, "Wait, I f-forgot to tell you the p-password!"
"Do you remember the password?" Harry asked with a smirk because Neville was very forgetful and it was often comical.
"Of course! I-it's...uhhhh...it's..." Neville suddenly looked very embarrassed, in a truly very comical way. Neville up to his old tricks again.
"Hold on," said Harry, stopping to put his hand on Neville's forehead. He could instantly see deep into the boy's mind, sifting through memories and information. And there, deep down in a warehouse of other forgotten stuff, was the password to Dumbledore's office. Harry smiled nicely to the bewildered Neville. "The password is Hot Dog Cremes."
"Wow!" said Neville incredulously, "Thanks Harry."
"No problem, Neville," said Harry, turning to go to the office again. Neville continued walking beside him. Harry was a bit annoyed, wanting to concentrate on his strategy with Dumbledore, but he didn't mind because it wouldn't take him long to figure out something brilliant.
Neville was rambling about school stuff when they passed by Blaise and Pansy, probably waiting to be able to see Draco again. Neville and Blaise suddenly looked at each other. It was a very strong look.
Harry watched as Neville's eyes narrowed a bit and a slow, sly, smouldering smile came to his lips. Blaise's eyes widened and he looked down at the floor, suddenly giving forth a quiet, nervous giggle. Pansy smirked knowingly, like she knew what was going on.
As soon as they had passed the pair, so had the moment. Though Harry could see Blaise looking at Neville for a long while with a longing sort of gaze.
"Got a little crush, Neville?" said Harry. Neville turned very red.
"N-n-n-no! "W-w-why would you t-th-t-think that! Uh! I have to g-go! B-b-bye!" said Neville before quickly turning a corner and running away. Harry chuckled to himself, shaking his head. He didn't need his amazing, expert skill at Legilimency to tell what was going on. People were so obvious sometimes.
Harry used the password to open the office. He probably could have opened it without it with his power, but he didn't want to show his true power just yet. His mind was prepared, he'd put up his blocks. But he hadn't blocked his mind completely. He let through thoughts that he wanted someone trying to read his mind to see, so they wouldn't think he was trying to block his mind. It was like a dam, where most of the water was blocked but some could get through at the top. Or it was like a coffee with a cute, harmless design made into the steamed milk on the top. But it hides the searing hot truth underneath, anyone who sipped too deeply would get burned by the hot coffee beneath. Or like a poisonous snake, who seemed like it was smiling at its former friends, but whose fangs were folded up until it was about to bite. Harry was ready.
He opened the door to the office and strolled in, noting that Ron and Hermione were here too. Interesting. "Hello Albus," Harry chirped cheerfully, "Is anything wrong?"
Dumbledore's blue eyes twinkled manipulatively. "Not at all, Harry, my boy," he said innocently, gesturing to a chair next to Ron and Hermione. Harry sat down comfortably, smiling fakely to Ron and Hermione before turning back to the headmaster.
"I'm not exactly a boy, anymore, you know. And please, call me...Lord Hogwarts." He laughed silently to himself while keeping an honest smile on his face.
Dumbledore's face faltered a bit, but he quickly regained composure, threading his bony, spidery, long fingers together. "Ah, yes of course, Lord Hogwarts, my...man." He cleared his throat. "Your best friends ever, who've always supported you, have just brought up some concerns." The old man gestured to the treacherous duo of Ron and Hermione.
Hermione, looked away, and said, "We're a bit concerned, Harry," she said, though Harry knew she was only worried about not having such close access to Harry to kill him. "You've been behaving...differently of late. Consuming unaccompanied at your table, residing individually in your house. Spending occasions with...unsavory individuals. We wondered if perhaps you'd savor to resume inhabiting Gryffindor. Isn't that correct, Ronald?"
Ron looked surprised at being asked to speak, his mouth full of a sandwich. "Huh....yeh! Food's bah, fer one. An' goh-a stop hangin' out wif' Ma-foy, filfy Slyth'rn," he said unintelligibly, crumbs and spit cascading out his mouth.
"What was that?" Harry asked, looking confused. He cast a secret spell to make Ron's food take up more space in his mouth.
"Ah sah, gah sah huh uh wuh mahfuh!" Ron replied. Hermione shook her head, looking disgusted.
"Ron, stop conversing while masticating! It's abhorrent!" Harry cast a spell to make the chewing sound louder to only her.
Ron tried again, but only get out a gurgle this time. Hermione covered her ears, horrified. That sound would forever haunt her nightmares.
"Ha-...Lord Hogwarts," said Dumbledore, "I'd be perfectly happy to allow you to eat and sleep with your wonderful, good friends in Gryffindor." He smiled, looking like he was trying to be nice or something. Harry pretended like he was contemplating the suggestion.
"Hmm," he said, looking over past the dumb little whirring and puffing silver things to where Fawkes was sitting on his perch. "Albus," he said, as if the thought just came to him. "Fawkes is your horcrux, isn't he?" he said, making sure he didn't sound like he thought it was bad or anything, and making sure his visible thoughts didn't think that as well. "That's how you were able to pretend to die." He continued to smile calmly.
"Uh...well...I mean...not exactly...I mean, it's not the same as Vol-" Dumbledore started, suddenly looking quite nervous, sweating into his beard.
"Oh, no, don't worry, Albus," Harry interrupted, holding up a hand, "I think it's very clever. You're an extremely smart and good wizard. Your plan to kill Voldemort was excellent. It even turned out better than you'd hoped, didn't it? I didn't have to die, after all." He gave everyone an oblivious-seeming smile.
"Yes, of course, and we're all very glad of that," said Dumbledore, and Ron and Hermione nodded in false agreement.
"I simply noticed because as a newly-inherited phoenix-kin, I have a connection with Fawkes, and I can feel the extra load he's carrying." It was an evil, twisted, filthy load. No wonder he always looked so messy. Harry was outraged that such a noble creature could be used for such a nefarious purpose. He'd have to put the firebird out of its misery, unfortunately, to end his suffering. He'd have to figure out how to permanently kill a phoenix. It was pretty smart of Dumbledore to use an immortal creature as a Horcrux. Maybe he'd ask Blaise. Harry had sensed some vibes of phoenix knowledge in him when they'd passed in the hallway earlier. He would definitely know more about it than Hermione and her dumb books.
Harry turned back to Dumbledore, all those thoughts only taking place in less than a second. "As for Gryffindor...It's a tempting offer, but I also now have a connection with Hogwarts. And I can feel that she, did you know she's a she, by the way? She really wants me to be in Vampirius. And to live in its dormitory. It's been empty for so long after all, hidden away. I don't want to upset Hogwarts, after all, she's been through quite a lot lately," said Harry reasonably. Poor Hogwarts, having to endure such a horrible, conniving, manipulative, sneaky, fake headmaster for so many years.
"But what about....," said Dumbledore, stalling as he struggled to think with his old mind. "What about Quidditch? You were the star player. What would your team do without you?"
Harry laughed silently to himself. "I'll just start my own Vampirius team." Unblocking his magical cores had made him so good at sports he didn't need any team members to win. He wouldn't even need a dumb broom to fly around on now that he had phoenix-kin powers.
"But..." stuttered Dumbledore.
"I think this conversation is over," Harry said, standing up dramatically. He stabbed quickly into Dumbledore's mind, easily pulling out an old childhood nickname to taunt him with. "Don't you agree....Dumb-Bore?"
Dumbledore was stunned into silence. Got him. The old man was finally seeing the true terrifying majesty of this cool, amazing boy...no, man, before him.
Harry turned, his trenchcoat whipping behind him as he did so.
A/N: Like this, but Harry is way hotter, imo.
He'd made his point. But it seemed Ron had finally managed to swallow his food, and had something to say out of his asinine ginger mouth.
"Oi! Harry, mate! That's all well and good, but...you've changed so much! Your hair and clothes and uh...this phoenix tosh. It's all so bloody...different! It's got me all collywobbles, it does. I mean sure, you're very cool and smart and...I'm sure you're very fit to blokes and birds who fancy blokes, but...we miss you! We want the old Harry back!"
Harry, halfway out the door, smiled bitterly at the thought of himself before this summer. Small, shrimpy, brunette, near-sighted, average, oblivious and blindly trusting... Of course that's how they wanted him. Dumb and unknowing so they could keep stealing his money. Well, too bad for them.
"The old Harry.............." he said, only turning his head back a few degrees, maybe 14 degrees at most, "Is dead."
Ron was shocked, already stuffing his mouth again with a potato and sausage sandwich. "Cor blimey."
Hermione was silent, for once unable to summon up any of her annoying dictionary words.
And with that Harry shut the door, done talking to these two-faced fucks. He had much more interesting things to do, in his opinion.
---------
A/N: It was a close race, but I think you can figure out who won the Blaise shipping contest ;D My writing partner crabmeats said I should include Ginny to be fair, but I'm secretly glad no one picked her! X)