RASHA POV :
I want to give Siwon his gift, but when ?
We are done with the food and the others are either working or in their rooms . Maybe I should go now. I went to the room , Siwon was sitting reading a book .
"Hey ^^ " He greeted as soon as I got in
" Hey ^^ what are you doing ? "
" Just reading "
" How do you feel now ? Better ? "
" Yes, but I'm mad at you "
" Mad at me ? Why ? "
" Cause you took so long to comeback and I told you to comeback soon " He pouted
" But we were shopping ! Of course we will not finish soon especially when Zhoumi oppa is the one who is leading us . And besides I brought you a gift, but since you are mad I'll not give it to you "
" A gift ? For me ? I'm not mad anymore " He pulled me down to his bed and made me sit .
" Are you sure you are not mad at me anymore ? "
" I would never be mad at you , ever ! " Wonnie said with his beautiful dimples showing, and what he said made me happy .
" Ok , are you ready ? "
" Yes "
" Tada here it is ^^ "
" Wah ! Rasha, it's really beautiful. Thank you so much "
" You are welcome wonnie "
" I'll try it on " Siwon said and took off his shirt
OMG Siwon just took off his shirt in front of me !. Me sitting on his bed . He sitting in front of me half naked . Me , Siwon. OMG I'm red like a tomato and have no idea what to do or how to act or... I'm so nervous and confused and .. and .. AHHHHH I wanna scream .
Suddenly the door opened
" Oh O.O sorry for interrupting " Ryeowook
" What? NO ! " I screamed. WTH is he thinking we were doing ? Oh, no, He thinks we were... we were . Wookie immediately got out and closed the door .
What am I gonna do ? How I'll explain to Wookie what happened ? I turned to see Siwon reaction . It's really weird he didn't try to explain to Wookie or even interacted . When I turned ,Siwon was still shirtless, but he moved closer .
I started leaning back and he continued leaning forward until I was completely laid on the bed and Siwon on the top of me .
Only the space of the air separates us and this could disappear any minute if Siwon decided to lay on me completely . As if that wasn't enough, the look in his eyes changed from being happy with the gift, to being happy with our position like that with some desire .
I need to move . I tried to pull off , but Swion grabbed my hands and intertwined between our fingers . What he wanted was pretty obvious since his eyes were fixed on my lips. OMG S-siwon ... Siown is... gonna kiss me ! O-O I still didn't recover from the last time ><
OUT SIDE THE ROOM :
Ryewook was still holding the door knob with his left hand and holding his heart with the right one .
" Oh my, what did just happen ? What were they doing ? Were they gonna... Kiss O.o ? Are they together ? Rasha seemed startled while Swion looked normal. Oh poor Rasha, Siwon is being a bad boy "
" Ryewook-ah what is it ?You look terrified ? " Donghae said
" Ah, annia. eobso " Wookie laughed nervously
" Why are you holding Siwon's and Rasha's door knob ? "
" N-nothing " he laughed nervously again
" Yes, there's something.. Are they ? Oh my !! " Donghae pushed Wook, opened the door and saw them . Only inches separate them
BACK TO RASHA POV :
"What are you doing ? O.O " Donghae almost yelled
" Noth" Siwon cut me off
" What do you think we are doing ? " He looked at Hae playfully
"Are you.. Are you gonna kiss ? " Donghae said disbelievingly .
Swion nodded " Yes we are and you interrupt us so would you kindly get out and leave us ALONE "
" Y-yeah, of course. Sorry " Donghae said and closed the door
Siwon smiled at me sweetly and a smile escaped from my lips , too . Oh wait ,I shouldn't smile. He will think that I want him to kiss me .It's not like I don't want it . I do, badly ,but .. but.. I don't know .
Siwon titled his head a little so our noses don't touch while closing the remaining space . He closed his eyes and I did ,too .I almost can feel his lips touching mine. His hot breathes brushed my skin gently sending me shivers ... Eventually , he kissed me on my cheek near my lips !
I opened my eyes and he was smiling more like suppressing his laugh >< I looked at him confused and angry. Why did he make me think that he we were gonna kiss and end it up with only a kiss on cheeks ? Ahh I'm so embarrassed right now ><
" Y-yeah ! you babo " That was only what I could say to him.
I'm so embarrassed and frustrated cause he didn't kiss me.. What ? what am I saying ? I'm angry cause Siwon didn't do it ? Ahhhh Siwon is driving me crazy .
I released myself from him and rushed to the door, but Siwon held me before I reach the door and fixed me to the wall blocking my way with his hands .
His body was pressed against mine and I knew he wanted to kiss me, but maybe because of Donghae coming in, he didn't .
I loosened up and stopped resisting. Siwon also loosened his grip on my wrists . He placed his left hand on my waist while the other ran down my cheek to my chin and lifted it up .
Our eyes met and our hearts were beating so fast. Again, Siwon leaned down a little and his breathes ran over my skin .
" I'm sorry. I don't want to take your first kiss like that . Not yet "
Not yet? What is he talking about ? Are there more from these situations ? Oh my. Does it mean that Siwon doesn't love me ? And that's why he wouldn't take my first kiss? Is he waiting to love me ? But you can't wait to love someone . you either love him or not . Maybe he was startled by Wooki and Hae, but still..
" It's ok " I managed to speak .
It's not easy to speak when Siwon is standing or let me say pressing his body against mine, not to mention he's shirtless and was about kissing me . It's good enough that I'm still alive .
" Thanks " Siwon smiled . What is he thanking me for ?
" you know , you looked really beautiful and desirable when you closed your eyes ready to be kissed " Siwon smile widened and he was still fixing me to the wall
" W-hat ? I ... I wasn't ready " I averted my eyes from his
" Well you looked you were for me . It's wired to say it but I'm thankful that Wooki and Hae barged in, otherwise I was gonna do it for real "
" Huh ? " WTH is he saying? He's thankful for them ?
" Well you could just tell me to stop you . And it's not really nice to say to a girl thank God someone came in when you were about kissing her to stop you " I said coldly and angrily, like really ? Huh. it looks he really doesn't love me * ouch *
" I didn't mean it that way . Are you angry ? Oh so .. you wanted that kiss, too " Siwon smiled victoriously
" W-what? N-no "
" Yes, you did, you do want it "
I can't take it anymore. It's so embarrassing. I pushed him and turned to the door to get out ,but Swion hugged me from the back .
" Siwon let me go ,please "
" No. I can't "
" Why ? "
" Cause you are angry with me "
SIWON POV :
I must have hurt her feelings . I know she already loves me . I shouldn't have done this from the first place or at least since I started it , I should have kissed her .
" I'm not " She answered
Yes, you are . If you are not look at me in the eye and tell me " I loosened my grip on her
" Ok... I'm not angry with you. I don't have the right for that cause in the end you are not my boyfriend . You don't love me . Sorry for being stupid and childish " She said with sadness .
Ouch, that hurts, especially her last words. Tears started forming in her eyes and she ran away before I could hold her .
RASHA POV :
I couldn't handle it anymore . I was about crying. What Siwon did or rather didn't do hurt me so much .And what he said was really hard cause it kind of told me that he doesn't have any feelings for me . Maybe what Donghae said on my first day in South Korea was right . Maybe Siwon was being nice to me not just because I was a girl and he is a gentleman .
As for when he was sick, it was only because he needed to feel being cared for . Maybe cause his mother wasn't here and I was the only female . But still it hurts cause I allowed myself to fall for him so deep , not as an idol, but as a person . I love him for who he is....
I pumped into Heechul . Great!
" Hey watch it ! "
" Sorry oppa "
" Oh Rasha are you ok ? Why are you crying ?"
" I'm not . It's the onion . I always tear when I chop it " I said and ran before he could ask anything further .
I need to go to Donghae . I don't know why , but it feels he's the right person to go to . I went to his room and he was there .
NO ONE POV :
" Rasha , what happened ? Are you ok ? " She shook her in denial
" Come here " She sat beside him
" Tell me what happened . Did Siwon hurt you ? " she burst in tears as soon as Donghae asked
Donghae hugged her and she wrapped her hands tightly around his waist and cried . After a while she calmed a little bit.
" Now can you tell me what is it "
"You.. you saw what happened a while ago. I mean what was gonna happen "
" Was gonna happen ? Didn't you guys kiss ? " Donghae was surprised
" N-no "
" Then what ? ''
She told him what happened while sobbing
" Shshsh it's ok Rasha . I'm sure that Siwon didn't mean it . Maybe he got nervous "
Like really what's wrong with siwon ? He was about kissing her twice ,but he didn't . He even said he was thankful that me and Wooki came in . This really hurts . He already knows that she's in love with him. This is weird . Donghae thought .
After a while Rasha stopped crying and sobbing. Her grip loosened . She was asleep . Main while Siwon was standing outside the room . He couldn't hear anything of what she said . He only heard her sobs and that hurt him . He hated himself for making her cry .
Donghae opened the door and found Siwon standing there .
" How is she ? " Siwon asked sadly
" She's sleeping "
" Did she tell you ? "
" Yes. Siwon you hurt her a lot . She cried so hard "
" I know and I hate myself for that "
" You know she loves you , right ? "
" Yes. That's why I'm mad at myself . I love her ,too , but I can't tell her , not yet "
" Oh , I understand from that you still didn't tell her ? "
" No, I can't . I know she will act as if it's ok , but she will hurt " you all gonna hate me if things went that way Siwon thought .
" You are right, but you either have to tell her or try to act as if she's only a friend . Otherwise you will keep hurting the both of you "
" I'll... Can I see her ? "
" Of course, but try not to wake her "
Siwon got in and found her sleeping in Donghae's bed . He sat beside her and wept the tears that didn't dry on her cheeks .
" I'm sorry for hurting you " He kissed her forehead before going back to their room .
Donghae went to Zhoumi to tell him cause he was pretty close with Rasha . They went to Zhoumi and Henry room
" Henry-ah can you get out for a while ? We need to talk " Donghae
" Talk about what ? Is everything alright ? "
" Yes. It's just personal "
" Ok " Henry went out ...
" Hey ^^ Did you see Donghae ? " Eunhyuk asked when he saw Henry coming out of the room
" Yes, he's with Zhoumi in the room "
" Ok , thanks " Eunhyuk got in the room
Henry went to the living room
" Hello hyung " He greeted Heechul
" Hey .. Mm Henry Did you see Rasha ? "
" No, why ? "
" She didn't seem alright " The onion lie didn't work with Heechul, he knew something was off .
" I don't know "
" Where're Donghae and Zhoumi ? "
"They are together with Eunhyuk in my and Zhoumi room "
" Oh, ok , I'll go there " Heechul went
Henry found it wired . What's the personal thing between Donghae and Zhoumi ? Why did Eunhyuk joined them ? Even heechul went there . Why was Siwon looking so sad ? That's it, Henry decided to go and see what's going on .
" Hyungs, there's something going on so please don't lie to me, I know it's not my birthday so tell me what is it ? "
" You are right . Since you already felt it , go and call Ryewook . He needs to know too " Donghae told him .
Doghae told them what happened
" So that what happened. Please don't tell anyone that I told you. We all know why Siwon is not telling her and it's a lame excuse, but still " Donghae
" It must be hard on Rasha " Mimi
" And Siwon , too, especially that he still didn't tell her " Hyuk
" Yeah, it's not that big deal. He needs to tell her , she will understand. It's better than keeping hurting each other " Henry
" Guys don't change the way you act with her , ok ? She can't know that we know or she will start acting awkwardly around us " Heechul
" We should act as if nothing happened " Wook
RASHA POV :
I woke up after sleeping for four hours . I got up and went outside . I didn't dare to go to our room since Siwon can be there . I'm hurt so much ,but that doesn't give me the right to get angry at him . It's not his fault that he didn't love me . I need to say sorry for him . And until I find the courage to do it, I'll avoid Siwon .
" Rasha ^^ you woke up " Wookie
" Nae ,I was a little tired after all this shopping "
" I prepared everything so don't worry "
" Thanks oppa "
" Where are the others ? " As soon I asked ,Donghae , Eunhyuk, Mimi , Henry , Heechul and Teuki came
"We are here ^^ " Teuki
" So are you ready to start this party ? " Hyuk
" Sure, let's change to our pajamas " Teuki said excitedly
Now this can be a problem , how am I gonna enter the room ?
" I'll get your pajamas Rasha " Donghae winked me
" You can change in my room " Heechul said and that was wired . He never let anyone in his room alone .
" O-ok "
We changed and gathered all in the living room . I sat between Donghae and Mimi .First we ate, then had a friendly singing competition . After that we watched a movie, then we started playing games .
Since EunHae always together, I decided to ask Mimi to be my partner ,but Heechul asked me to be his partner ! I was surprised . Heechul was being extra nice and by that I mean he's not teasing me or making fun of me at all .
"Oppa, is there something ? " I asked Heechul
" No, why ? ''
" Well you are not teasing me or asking me to do things for you "
" Since you did everything I told you, and since you are such a sweet girl, I decided to treat you well for a change. Any way I'm a sweet person "
" Ok so the next challenge is this : Every team will hold this rob from one side and start pulling . The winner is who makes the other team fall " Teuki explained
We played until there was only two teams, Me and Heechul and Siwon and Leeteuk. Irony right ?
" So the finals. Are you ready ? " Yesung
" Let the best win " I said
" I'll cheer for you Rasha " Sungmin
" One, two, three , GO ! " Yesung
We started pulling . weirdly we won ! I thought we would lose for Siwon and teuki . I jumped from happiness and hugged Heechul . We did a victory dance .
" Congrats ^^ " Teuki
" thanks ^^ I have an idea , oppas Do you remember when you did this angry girlfriend acting on Happy Camp ? "
" Yes "
" Let's do it here ! "
" Ok ^^ "
After five minutes of preparations we started with Zhoumi and Henry which was hilarious. Kang in and Shin dong which was funny and wired . sungmin and Kyuna which was cute since Sungmin acted all cute while Kyu was trying to ask him for forgiveness.
Yesung and Wookie which was musical since they chose to sing and it was better than any musical in the world ! Eunhyuk and Donghae which was , now how to describe it? Mmm it was EunHae ? kkk
Then it was me and Heechul turn. I walked ahead looking all furious and angry .
" Jagia " Heechul tried to touch my shoulder but I pushed his hand .
" Don't touch me ! " I walked but Heechul grabbed my hand and turned me to him .
" I'm sorry "
I said nothing and looked away .
" Will you please look at me ? ''
" No "
" Please "
I looked at him
" I'm sorry . I didn't mean it " He pulled me closer
" You know that I love you, right ? " He continued
" Promise me this will be the last time "
" I promise "
" Ok ,I forgive you "
" I love you so much honey "
" I love you too oppa " and we hugged
Then he looked me in the eye and caressed my cheek gently . He leaned down and whispered
" I know everything . Don't worry I'll help you "
" Thanks oppa. I really appreciate it "
Heechul gave me a kiss on the cheek, ruffled my hair and was about giving me a hug when Siwon came between us .
" It's our turn now " He said .
I looked at him confused , he said nothing . We sat back while the other clapping .
" That was really good Rasha " Wookie
" Yeah great job, the both of you ^^ " Sungmin
" The best till now ^^ " Hyuk
" That's my honey " Mimi
" You learnt from me, right princess ?" Donghae flashed me a smile
Siwon and Leeteuk started
"Baby I'm sorry " Siwon started
" Don't talk to me " Teukie
" Honey please " Siwon
" stop it ! you embarrassed me in front of our friends . We lost the bet and we were supposed to kiss but you didn't ! Now they will think that you don't love me ! " Teukie
" It's not that I don't want it " Siwon
" Then what ? " Teukie
" It will be our first kiss and I want it to be special " Siwon said wile fixing his eyes on me
I felt my heart beating fast . Is he talking to me ? No, he's not . He's just acting
" really ? " Teukie
" Yes, really. And speak of it . Since we are alone do you want to ? " Siwon
Teukie smiled and nodded . Siwon approached Leeteuk and gave him a hug and said while his eyes on me
" I want to kiss you , love. More than anything in the world , but not yet. Just wait a little longer .I'm sorry "
Siwon said these words as if he was addressing me and it hurts me so bad . First cause I want them to be real and second, cause I made him sad before .
" So let's vote and choose the winners " Kang in
....
" The best team was ... We have equality in votes the winner teams are Rasha & Heechul hyung and Siwon hyung & Leeteuk hyung " Henry
" The best actor is ... Siwon hyung ! ^^ " Henry announced
" And the best actress is ... Rasha ^^ " Henry said and gave me a hug so did everyone else but Siwon . We kind of avoided each other .
After some other games , we decided to sleep. It was already late . I was supposed to sleep between Zhoumi and Donghae but Siwon came and laid in Mimi place
" hyung , sorry but this is my place " Mimi told Siwon
" I know Zhoumi-ah , but let me sleep here " Then he whispered something to him
" It's ok, don't worry " Mimi told me and slept beside Siwon
An hour passed but I couldn't sleep . I turned to Swion and he turned to at the same time . He was awake ,too. We were surprised for a moment
" Hey ^^ " I smiled .I know it hasn't been such a long time but I already miss him . He is the only one who I never quarreled with before .
" Hi ^^ Can't sleep ? " Siwon
" No. You ? " Me
" No... You did a great job with Heechul hyung "
" Thanks Wonnie ^^ "
" I miss you calling like that "
NO ONE POV :
" You did a great job with Teukie, too "
" Thanks . It would have been better if you were the one " They both smiled shyly and Siwon continued
" I wanted to choose you , but Heechul hyung had already asked you "
" Oh , yes. I was surprised he did , but he was helping me " opps Rasha said in her mind. She shouldn't have said that .
" Helping you ? " Siwon asked
" Ah, well after... after what happened earlier I went to Donghae oppa. On my way I pumped into Heechulie and it looks that he asked Donghae oppa about what happened "
" Oh " Siwon said sadly after he remembered what happened
" Siwon oppa I want to say sorry for what happened earlier and for being mad at you "
" It's ok hon, I mean Rasha . I'm the one who is supposed to apologize . I "
" Oppa , let's forget it . lt ... it's from the past " and it hurts me she completed silently
" But I meant everything I said " Siwon said meaning the acting scene with Leeteuk
" Oh, it's ok oppa . Any way it's not like we are a couple or something . You don't need to repeat every think about Wookie and Hae coming in and everything . Let's consider it as a weakness moment , ok ? And you were right , it's good they stopped us, or things would be awkward between us . Let's sleep "
Rasha said and turned her back before Siwon could see her crying , but she was wrong cause Siwon knew she will cry , so he said nothing further .
He was hurt himself , too . Especially after what she said it's past . even though Rasha didn't mean it, it still hurt him so much. A tear escaped from his eye, but he wept it . He can't cry. No .
He wants to tell her that he loves her and hold her in his arms and never let go , but he can't . Just can't. Not yet . He needs to tell her about that thing before he can confess. Any way he still didn't tell the others about it . He lied to them so they don't worry .
Meanwhile Donghae eavesdropped them. He didn't mean to , but since he has insomnia , Donghae couldn't help it . He turned to Rasha and saw her tears streaming by themselves like water fall . You can't blame her, she thinks that Siwon doesn't love her .
Donghae wept her tears and smiled warmly . Siwon was his friend , one of his best friends . And Rasha was one of them , too . she held a special place in his heart . She was like his little sister .Donghae felt sorry for the both of them and wished he could tell her that Siwon loves her too , but Swion is the only one who has the right to tell her his feelings .
" Hey , don't cry " Donghae said softly
" I can't oppa "
" Oh, my dear princess, crying doesn't suit you , please stop crying " Donghae hugged her placing his head over hers
She buried her face in his chest and cried without any sound . Some sobs escaped from her and Siwon heard them .
He blamed himself for making her crying . She was his sweet angel . The girl who said proudly that he is her bias in the airport in front of everyone . The girl who stuttered and fan-girled about him in front of him .
He really wanted to hug her , but he knew she's gonna be ok with Donghae and that relieved him a little . Beside Mimi and him,Donghae was the closest one to her . Even Teukie, Sungminie, Eunhyukie , Wook , Heechul , Kyu, Henry and Yesung were close to her . Besides Kang in and shin dong who are not always here, but they treated her like their little sister and always brought her something .
Still , after all , he wished he was the one who's hugging her instead of Donghae .
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Hello there ^^
So that wasn't exactly what you expected after all the lovey dovey between Siwon and Rasha , right ? Hehehe Sorry for disappointing you.
What's going on with Siwon, what is this thing he is worried about ? Why not telling SJ to help him? Can they help him in the first place ?
Oppa , tell me what is it. I'll help you no matter what
Did you like how Siwon acted after he got his present ? I mean all these kissing attempts ? they were sweet ^w^ I wish I was her ><
Almost forgot DID YOU SEE SIWON PHOTOS FOR HELIANTHUS FALL/ WINTER 2014 ? Allow me to say that Siwon looks hot * blush * and so handsome ! ♥
Don't forget to VOTE and COMMENT PLEASE PLEASE . Love ya
Only 15 days before Leeteuk comes back ! Finally . I missed him so much
XOXO