Hotel Room – Day
Dean is seated at a table, looking through papers. Sam is at the other end, working on his laptop. "Sweet. Blood, boils, locusts"
"Three of your more popular Egyptian plagues" Sam tells him.
Dean picks up a jar containing the locusts "Yeah, but these guys...ate their way out of a cop's melon. I don't quite remember that in the King James"
"Meanwhile, a kid named Christopher Birch was shot in the head last month after a vehicle pursuit. Hatch, Gray and Colfax were the three officers involved, and they all filed the exact same police report"
"Suspect exited vehicle brandishing a firearm. We were forced to fire" Dean reads from a report. "Just a kid with no face and a planted gun. Bunch of dicks. So they pop the kid, plant the piece"
"Maybe Colfax is right. You know, maybe heaven has a hate-on for bad cops" Sam guesses.
"So we're listening to the guy with the bug in his custard? That's – that's the, uh, the theory you want to go with?" Dean asks.
"Dean, angels got to have something to do, right, now that we're post-apocalypse?"
Dean opens a beer "We should call Cas"
"You're kidding, right?" Sam scoffs. "Dean, I tried. It was the first and second and third thing I did, son of a bitch won't answer the phone"
Dean sits on a bed "Well, let's give it a shot. Now I lay me down to sleep. I pray to Castiel to get her feathery ass down here"
"You're an idiot"
"Stay positive" Dean tells him.
"Oh, I am positive"
"Come on, Cas! Don't be a dick. We got ourselves a... plague-like situation down here, and...do you...do you copy?" Dean begs to Castiel again.
"Like I said..." Sam clears his throat "Son of a bitch doesn't answer—" There is a sound of wings behind Sam "she's right behind me, isn't she?" Sam turns around and sure enough there she is.
"Hello" Castiel greets them.
"Hello?" Sam asks.
"Y-yes" She stutters.
"Hello" Sam imitates her "Hello?" before saying it again in a normal voice.
"Uh, that is still the term?" Castiel asks confused.
"I spent all that time trying to get through to you. Dean calls once, and now it's" He imitates Castiel's voice again "Hello?!"
"Yes"
"So, what, you – you like him better or something?" Sam scoffs.
"Dean and I do share a more profound bond" She then turns to Dean "I wasn't gonna mention it"
"Cas, I think what he's trying to say is that...he went to hell for us. I mean, he really took one for the team. You remember that? And then he comes back without a clue, and you can't take five friggin minutes to give him some answers?" Dean tells her.
"If I had any answers, I might have responded. But I don't know, Sam. We have no idea who brought you back from the cage...or why" Castiel tells them strongly.
"So...it wasn't God?" Sam asks.
"No one's even seen God. The whole thing remains mysterious" Castiel admits.
"What the hell does that mean?"
"what part of 'I don't know' escapes your understanding?" Castiel asks.
"Cas, look, if Sam calls, you answer. Okay? You wing your ass down, and you tell him, 'I don't know'. Just because we have some sort of a – a bond or whatever..." Dean tells her.
"You think I came because you called? I came because of this" She walks over to the table where Dean's research is spread out.
"Oh, well, it's nice to know what matters"
"It does help one to focus"
"Wait, so – so you and the Halo Patrol, you guys aren't the cause of these killings?" Sam asks.
"No. but they were committed with one of our weapons. There's only one thing that could have brought this into existence. You call it the Staff of Moses" Castiel explains.
"The staff?" Sam asks.
Castiel picks up the jar of locusts "It was used in a dominance display against the Egyptians, as I recall"
"Yeah. That one made the papers" Dean scoffs.
"B-but I thought the Staff turned, like, a – a river into blood, not one dude" Sam stutters.
"The weapon isn't being used at full capacity. I think we can rule Moses out as a suspect" Castiel tells them.
"Okay, but...what is – what is Chuck Heston's disco stick doing down here, anyway? I mean, don't you guys put away your toys?" Dean asks.
"Before the apocalypse, heaven may have been corrupt, but it was stable. The staff was safely contained" Castiel sighs "It's been chaos up there since the war ended. In that confusion, a number of...powerful weapons were...stolen"
"Wait, you – you're saying your nukes are loose?" Dean asks.
"Yeah, I'm afraid so. But you've stumbled onto one of them. We must find the weapon that did this" She indicates the jar of locusts "I need your help"
"That's rich. Really" Sam scoffs.
Castiel grunts, tossing the jar of locusts at Sam. She performs air quotes during this speech. "Sam, Dean, my 'people skills' are 'rusty'. Pardon me, but I have spent the las 'year' as a multidimensional wavelength of celestial intent. But believe me, you do not want that weapon down here. Help me find it. Or more people will die"
"All right. Okay. Well, if the angels didn't pull the trigger, then that brings us back to motive" Dean says.
"What?"
"Back to the case. Right now, we got three dead cops. Only linking them... is this" Dean hands Sam a newspaper clipping "Father of slain suspect calls for investigation"
**********
Birch Family Living Room – Day
A door slams, someone walks into the house. "Come on, dad. How many times are you gonna read that thing? You know what? We should just throw it away" Aaron tells his father.
"Go out back and play" the father, Darryl, mumbles not looking up from the paper.
Aaron leaves, Darryl begins to cut the story out of the paper. Sam, Dean and Castiel suddenly appear in the living room. "Oh, Cas, a little warning" Dean tells her.
"What the...how'd you get in here?!" Darryl asks shocked at seeing them.
"Mr. Birch, settle down" Sam shows his FBI badge. "Federal agents."
"But you can't just walk in here!"
"Quite a collection you've got there, huh?" Sam says, indicates to the clippings.
"What are you trying to—"
"Look, we know the truth, all right? Chris didn't have a gun on him when those cops shot him. They set him up" Sam interrupts him.
"Yeah. They're all getting theirs"
"And who's giving it to them, Darryl?" Sam asks with an accusing tone.
"Darryl? Did you kill Toby Gray and the others?" Dean jumps right to what they wanted to know.
"Me?! I didn't kill anyone! Look at how they died!"
"You smote them with the staff of Moses!" Castiel tells him.
"The hell kind of Fed are you?" Darryl asks.
"We don't have time for this" Castiel steps up to Darryl "Where is it?"
"Leave my dad alone" Aaron tells them, brandishing part of the staff as if it were a gun.
"Is that...? Yes" Castiel mumbles, staring at Aaron.
"Shouldn't it be bigger?" Sam asks.
"Yes. It's – it's been sawed off" Castiel answers him.
"Leave him alone! It wasn't him!"
"Aaron, get out of here!" Darryl tells his son.
Castiel presses two fingers to Darryl's forehead, Darryl falls back onto the sofa, unconscious.
"What did you do to him?" Aaron asks worried.
"it's all right. He's just sleeping" Dean assures him.
Aaron points the staff at Dean. Castiel teleports next to Aaron, takes away the staff.
"Cas, take it easy!" Dean tells her before turning his attention to Aaron "Listen, we're not here to hurt you, okay? But we need to know...where did you get this thing?"
"Please don't kill my dad. It was me. I did it" Aaron pleads.
"Okay, nobody's killing anybody. What's your name?" Dean asks.
"Aaron. Aaron Birch"
"Okay, Aaron Birch, where did you get this?" Dean asks again.
"You won't believe me"
"Try me"
"It was an angel"
"An angel?" Dean asks.
"Those liars, they killed my brother, and nothing bad even happened to them. It's not fair. So I prayed to God every night he would punish them. God didn't answer. But he did" Aaron tells them.
"His name – did he give you a name?" Castiel asks him.
"No. he just said I could have justice, but I was gonna have to take it myself. He...he gave me the stick"
"He just...gave it to you? Ah, come on. He didn't just give it to you, did he, Aaron?" Dean asks.
"I bought it"
"You bought it?" Sam chuckles "With what? What's your allowance?"
"What did the angel want for it? What did you give him for it?" Dean asks.
"My soul"
"You sold your soul to an angel?" Sam asks.
"Can that even happen?" Dean asks Castiel.
"It's never happened before. An angel's buying souls. That could explain why he cut the staff into pieces" Castiel explains.
"Why?" Sam asks.
"More pieces, more product"
"More product? Who is this guy?" Dean asks.
"We'll find him" Castiel presses her fingers to Aaron's forehead; Aaron falls unconscious.
"What did you do that for?" Dean asks her.
"Portability" Castiel carries Aaron over her shoulder, back in Sam's hotel room. Castiel places a still-unconscious Aaron on the bed.
"Cas, you realize you just kidnapped a kid?" Dean tells her.
"If the angel we seek truly bought this boy's soul, when a claim is laid on a living soul, it leaves a mark, a brand" Castiel tells them.
"What, like a – like a shirt tag at camp?" Sam asks.
"I have no idea. But I can read the mark and find the name of the angel that bought the soul" Castiel explains.
"How?" Dean asks.
"Well, painfully for him. The reading will be excruciating" Castiel says with no emotion.
"Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa. Hold on" Dean stops her.
"Dean"
"He's a kid, Cas. A Ki- Sam?" Dean looks to Sam for help.
"Any permanent damage?" Sam asks Castiel.
"What?!" Dean asks shocked.
"Physically, minimal"
"Oh, well, yeah, then by all means, stick your arm right in there" Dean says sarcastically.
"Dean! If I get the name, I can work a ritual to track the angel down" Castiel tells him desperately.
"And I'm all for that. But come on. There's got to be another way"
"There is no other way"
"You're gonna torture a kid?" Dean asks her serious.
"I can't care about that, Dean! I don't have the luxury" Castiel pushes her hand into Aaron's chest. Aaron screams. Dean advances. Sam holds him back.
They watch as Aaron screams and his body lights up from the inside. He stops screaming and falls unconscious when Castiel withdraws her hand. "He'll rest now"
"Did you get a name? what is it?" Sam asks.
"I thought he died in the war" Castiel says.
"What, he – he was a – he was a friend or something?" Sam asks her.
"A good friend" Castiel sighs.
"Yeah, well, your frat buddy is now moonlighting as a crossroads demon" Dean tells her.
"Balthazar. I wonder..." Castiel mumbles.
"So we can find him now, right?" Sam asks.
An angel appears. "Balthazar. Thanks, Castiel. We'll make good use of the name" the angel attacks Castiel with an angel-killing sword. Castiel blocks it with her own. "And by the way, Raphael says hello"
The angel and Castiel fight in the room until they both lose their swords. They grapple each other and jump through the window, falling several stories onto a car parked on the street. Sam and Dean look out the window. The angel disappears, leaving Castiel standing next to the destroyed vehicle.
"My car" Sam comments.
"Okay. Silver lining"
**********
Street – Day
Castiel is standing by the wrecked car. Sam and Dean are still up in the room. "He's gone" Castiel tells them, now back in the room behind them.
"Alright Cas, who was that guy?" Sam asks.
"A soldier of Raphael. He must have followed me when I answered your call" She tells them.
"Raphael? The archangel? I'm sorry, what's going on here?" Sam asks.
Castiel gets a bowl from a cupboard "I can explain later. Right now we have to—"
"No, not later. Now. Stop, all right? Too many angels, Cas! I don't know who's on first, what's on second" Dean interrupts her.
"What is second?" Castiel asks.
"Don't start that" Dean complains.
"It is simple: Raphael and his followers, they want him to rule heaven. I – and many others – the last thing we want is to let him take over. It would be catastrophic"
"You're talking civil war" Sam tells her.
"Technically, yes. Which is why we have to find Balthazar and his weapons before Raphael does. Whoever has the weapons wins the war" Castiel pulls Sam's weapon bag from under his bed.
"Help yourself" Sam tells her sarcastically.
"And what happens if Raphael wins? What – what does he want?" Dean asks.
Castiel gets a flask of holy water from Sam's bag "What he's always wanted – to end the story the way it was written"
"You mean the apocalypse, the one that we derailed?" Dean asks.
"Yes. That one. Raphael wants to put it back on the rails"
"Why?"
"I need myrrh" Castiel mumbles.
"Myrrh?" Sam asks.
Castiel is no longer standing by the bed. "Freakin angels" Dean mutters. Castiel reappears behind Dean. She is drawing on the kitchen table with chalk.
"Why does Raphael want to bring back all this crap?" Dean asks.
"He's a traditionalist"
"Cas, why didn't you tell us this?"
"I was ashamed. I expected more from my brothers. I'm sorry. Now I need your blood" Castiel grabs Dean's wrist and slices his palm.
"Whoa, whoa! Hey! Ahh! Why don't you use your own?"
"It wouldn't work. I'm not human"
Dean squeezes his hand shut. Blood drips into the bowl. Castiel adds myrrh and holy water and intones.
Sirens sound outside. "Uh, Cas, how long does this spell take?" Sam asks hearing the wailing intensify.
"Got him. Let's go"
"Whoa, whoa, whoa. What about him?" Dean points to Aaron, who is still lying on the bed unconscious.
"Didn't you think the police will take him home?" Castiel asks.
**********
Mansion – Night
Crickets chirping. "Huh. I was expecting more Dr. No, less Liberace." Dean, Sam and Castiel advance on the mansion.
Castiel is in an opulent foyer. A frog perched on the balustrade of a grand staircase is croaking. Castiel teleports upstairs, follows loud music into a room with a piano and strobe lights. The door closes. Castiel readies her angel-killing sword.
"Cas. You're here" Balthazar greets her.
"Balthazar"
"It's so good to see you. He told me you were floating around"
"He?" Castiel asks.
"I believe you two have flown together" He turns on the lights and the music stops "Oh, you know, the old frog in the throat" The body of the angel who attacked Castiel earlier is on the floor. A frog jumps out of his mouth and croaks.
"Even I know that that's a bad joke. I grieved your death"
"Yeah, yeah. I'm sorry about that, you know. I wanted them to think, you know, so...they wouldn't come looking for me?" Balthazar tells her.
"What...is all this? What are you doing?"
"Whatever I want. This morning I had a ménage à – what's French for 12?"
"You stole the staff of Moses?" Castiel asks with an accusing tone.
"Sure, sure. I stole a lot of things"
"You were a great and honorable soldier. We fought together" Castiel reminds him.
"Yes, too many times to count"
"I know you. You're not some common thief"
"Common? No. Thief? Eh" Balthazar shrugs.
"I need your help"
"I know. I've been hearing all about you, and as far as I'm concerned, you and me, Cas, nothing's changed. We're brother and sister. Of course I want to help you"
"Thank you. I need the weapons"
"Don't ask that" Balthazar tells her.
"Why take them? Why run away?"
"Because I could! What? What? I me – you're the one who made it possible. The footsteps I'm following – they're yours. What you did, stopping the big plan, the prize fight? You did more than rebel. You tore up the whole script and burned the pages for all of us" Balthazar laughs. "It's a new era. No rules, no destiny. Just utter and complete freedom"
"and this is what you do with it?" Castiel asks.
"Hey, screw it, right? I mean, dad's not coming back. You might as well blow coke and jump on the bed. You proved to me we could do anything, so I'm trying everything. What difference does it make?"
"Of course it makes a diff – it's civil war up there!" Castiel exclaims.
"I know"
"If we can beat Raphael, we can end this! Just give me the weapons"
Balthazar laughs "Do you know what's funny about you? You actually believe that you can stop the fighting. It will never stop. My advice – grab something valuable and fake your own death"
"You've gone insane. Your little holiday is over. Raphael knows you're alive by now" Castiel tells him.
"Oh, Raphael can try me anytime. I'm armed. I'm sorry, Cas. All else aside, I'm really, really happy to see you. Even though you still have that stick up your ass" Thunder crashes "Was that you?"
Castiel shakes her head.
"Oh, that's my cue then. Tell, uh, Raphael to bite me." Balthazar disappears.
Three angels are standing outside the mansion where Sam, Dean and Castiel had stood before.
**********
Thunder crashes. "Watch them. They're all snakes" Raphael and two angels walk toward the mansion.
Castiel is alerted to some developments.
**********
An angel armed with an angel-killing sword is patrolling the grounds. "Hey, there" Sam produces an angel-killing sword. "Yeah, I got one of those, too"
An angel appears behind Sam, holding the knife to his throat "You think you can knife-fight an angel?"
"Who's fighting? Peace out, douchewad" Dean slaps an angel-banishing sigil painted on the side of the house. The angel disappears.
**********
"You're making a mistake. Please. There is another way. Brother, please. I don't want to hurt you" Castiel tells a threatening angel.
The angel advances on Castiel. Castiel throws her knife into the angel's chest. The angel screams and vacates the body.
"Why won't any of you listen?" Castiel is then grabbed from behind.
"They don't listen, Castiel, because their hearts are mine" Raphael grabs Castiel by the collar and throws her back against a set of double doors that fall open.
Raphael kicks Castiel while she's down, then pulls her up to punch her several times. Castiel falls half-way down the grand staircase. Raphael kicks her to the bottom and teleports there to punch Castiel again.
"Somehow, I don't think God will be bringing you back this time" Raphael raises an angel-killing sword.
"Hey! Look at my junk" Balthazar holds up a glowing crystal.
"No" Raphael turns to salt from head to toe. The salt clatters to the floor.
"Same thing happened to Lot's wife. Iodize the poor sucker, and your kitchen is stocked for life" Balthazar laughs.
"You came back"
"Well, now Raphael will have to go shopping for a new vessel. Should give me a nice long head start on him. Until next time"
"next time" Castiel says.
"No time like the present." Dean slicks a lighter and drops it on a circle of holy oil that surrounds Balthazar.
"Holy fire. You hairless ape! Release me!" Balthazar demands.
"First you're taking your marker off of Aaron Birch's soul!" Dean demands back.
"Am I?!"
"Sam?!" Dean looks to Sam for help.
"Unless you like your wings extra crispy—" Sam uncorks a bottle of holy oil "—I'd think about it"
"Castiel, I stood for you in heaven. Are you gonna let—"
"I believe...the hairless ape has the floor" Castiel interrupts him.
"Very well" Balthazar laughs. He inhales, touches his clasped hands to his forehead, exhales. "The boy's debt is cleared. His soul is his own"
"Why you buying up human souls, anyway?" Dean asks.
"Is this economy? It's probably the only worth buying. Do you have any idea what souls are worth? What power they hold? Now...release me"
"Suck it, ass clown. Nobody said anything—" Castiel lowers her hand, lowering the flames. "Cas, what the hell?" Dean asks her.
"My debt to you is cleared" Castiel tells Balthazar.
"Fair enough" Balthazar disappears with the sound of a flap of wings.
"Cas, are you out of your mind?!" Dean turns to Castiel, but she disappears. "Cas?! Oh, friggin' angels! Come on!"