i just finished putting together some clothes for saturday's photoshoot and boiii they're more rushed than anything i've ever prepared for other events like these lol. i think i'm getting better at applying liquid eyeliner tho, since it's way better compared to the first time i tried.
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DAY XV - YOUR ZODIAC SIGN AND IF YOU THINK IT MATCHES YOUR FUCKING PERSONALITY
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okay... i think i'm gonna have a little trouble with this, as, uh, i don't really know how i am. self-discovery is gradually coming to me, but the stuff i've been saying at the previous chapter are just parts of it, so it's not really as easy as of now.
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√ so... my zodiac sign is capricorn, and it's being stereotyped as the most strict, most diligent, most business-minded sign, which, i don't really think matches any of my traits. well, sure, i might be a little more hardworking when it comes to shit i actually want to do (e.g. this current shoot imma attend), but i'm a fucker when it comes to the boring as fuck academics. i don't even want to be some overpowered, influential businessperson either, and i have totally not set my goals on some high peak which makes people question my sanity.
but who knows, it may just be the result of being dragged around by people with the same attitude, or because i've been pretending to be as such for a long time, i don't know. but as things are going on at the moment, i'm not as much of an authoritarian as how they describe capricorns in books and some shit online. well, it might be true that capricorns are said to be hyped about things they're passionate about, but i dunno.
am i really excited about being in a world like this, or is it just because i had acquaintances that got me going? it's seriously confusing, i mean, what the fuck is a personality? lol
anyways...
some described capricorns to be prone to mental problems, like being more inclined towards the psychotic life, or having the kind of thinking wherein they're manipulative as fuck (which one of my psychoanalytic teachers told me but ummm). and in those cliché zodiac books where there's the "signs in a horror movie" thing, capricorn was identified as "the one who snapped and went on a killing spree". so my theory about this sign is that, they're too organized and have lots of plans that when some shit messes up, they lost their fucking minds and become bitches about it, in which there would be two possibilities; either they'll use underhanded methods to get back to it (considering their "manipulative" quality), or, they'll have trouble piecing their life back together and they all fall down.
i can't say that those theses above are true about me, since usually, when shit happens, i forget it. not really forget. in fact, i keep it in mind for life, never letting go of it and keeping this large grudge that is being hidden by layers of self-deception and outward misconception. but what i mean by "forgetting" is that... i go on and be a ass about it for a few days at most, then discard of it and kinda start fresh, idk.
like, for example, i trashed a room, then after a few days of contemplation, i fix the place. i don't let outer factors influence things that grab me some fucking fun.
i guess i'm pretty simple-minded, and that applies to my zodiac sign. it's as if a capricorn wants only to reach the height they have always wanted to since they started planning and having a mind of their own. and they're described to be unwavering from their ideals, and that is something i would like to be. although i can hold my ground in an argument without being selfish and saying that everything is just about me, i don't particularly feel as if i'm the best at keeping my shit intact as well.
capricorns are said to be sarcastic and bitter about everything, and idk if this applies to me, but i'm pretty sure i'm such a bitter gourd about every single shit that doesn't go my way. i've had this conversation (argument) with someone yesterday, and they've been greatly offended with some "worst kind of sarcasm" i apparently have been sticking to during the argument. although it's fun to troll people sometimes with it, i try not to get to it during something serious as what i have mentioned.
anyways, what else does everything say about capricorns? hmmm...
i dunno anymore. mind's on soup mode after all the drama that fucking happened, so imma just cut this right here. if i had finished this yesterday, maybe my answer would be a little more solid. but now that i've had a dream, which went on and on until the death game in that figment if my imagination was finished, then moved to a scene where i was murdering someone on a hospital bed, i can't write shit lmao. my head also fucking hurts like i got it bashed into a wall or something, egh.
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ok here. and also, this drama shit is solid proof that i do not work well with groups at all.
anyways, IcicleIke15, here's da shirt.
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