Third person's POV [Logan's POV]
Logan didn't feel particulary nice eating for free at Joy's home, so he decided to take some apples as a gift. He had initially declined Joy's invitation for a special dinner at her home [a farewell party for his brother] but in the end he gave in. He loved her mum's cooking, his own mum didn't cook half as good as her when she was alive.
He dressed up in his usual stiff shirt and dark jeans. Standing in front of the mirror, he combed his hair neatly. He had showered properly and felt fresh, his hair softly falling over his forehead. His sky blue shirt hung loose as he tucked it in his jeans. Staring at his reflection, he promised himself that he would eat more and work out once he had the free time and money. He didn't want to be skinny forever, all clothes looked baggy on him in spite of being tall. Maybe being tall made him look skinnier.
He grabbed the keys, his wallet, his phone and the brown paper bag consisting of the apples. He locked his apartment and entered the unreliable elevator which shook terrifyingly and produced the usual helicopter like sounds. He let out a breath of relief once he reached the ground floor and just as the doors opened, his eyes met Marilyn's.
"Hey kiddo," Marilyn greeted in her everyday mysterious glory. Joy had told Logan about Marilyn and Shaun, so Logan wondered what she was doing here? Wasn't she invited to the dinner as Shaun's close friends were invited? Perhaps she herself didn't choose to go. "Where are you off to?"
"To Joy's place," Logan replied uneasily.
Marilyn only nodded and entered the elevator, her face devoid of any emotion. "See you around kid."
"Yeah," Logan breathed as the doors closed. Well, that was awkward. He simply shrugged and started trudging towards Joy's house.
Ten minutes later, he arrived at the typical suburban house with blue roof, bright white walls, cute little french windows, cream coloured door and a green mowed lawn. Their house was a little bigger than the rest of the houses lined up in the street. Joy's family weren't particularly rich, but quite well off. They earned enough that they could provide for their children an easy life and afford Joy's medical expenses with little loan.
Logan rang the doorbell and awkwardly shifted his weight from one leg to another. He was feeling hot and bothered, the sweltering heat of the sun burning his skin as he loosened his collar. There was some shuffling noises inside and the door finally swung open, much to his relief.
Gemma peered out and Logan inwardly groaned. He knew that she had autism and had forgiven her for her past troubles, in fact that had meant nothing to him, but he didn't want to go through that again. Once she would create a scene, her mother would only scold her and that would hurt that poor girl more. Thankfully, Gemma didn't push him and instead asked in her normally soft voice, "Why are you here?"
"Joy invited me for dinner," he replied glibly.
"Okay." She simply opened the door further and stepped aside, letting him in. Perhaps the scene at the lighthouse had changed her perspective towards Logan. She must have realized that Logan was harmless and did care about Joy and that her sister was in safe hands. Logan realized this too as he nodded at her, but her gaze was casted down. Just then, Joy appeared in the doorway.
"Hey Logan, come on in!" Joy held his clammy hand and led him in. Logan noticed that she looked classy and older in her chic beige coloured blouse and smart white skirt. She was oblivious to how she looked and what effect she had on Logan as she continued, "I'm so glad that you came now. The table's set and Shaun's friends are already seated. By the way, was it hot outside?"
"Yeah and erm . . . I bought these apples." He lifted the paper bag up as Joy halted outside the dining area.
Right then, her mum emerged. Joy said while taking the apples and thrusting it to her mum, "Logan bought these."
"Thanks Logan, you didn't have to. We're happy to have you here, you don't have to bring anything," her mum said sweetly.
Logan smiled shyly. "Your welcome and it's honestly nothing."
"It is something. Anyway, come here." Joy grinned as she dragged him inside. The dinning area was fairly huge, but was crammed with Shaun's friends who were sturdily built. Logan felt anxious and out of place in presence of these carefree looking guys merely few years older than him.
Joy took the hard work of introducing him to all and initially he did feel weird and wanted to shut Joy's lovely mouth, but soon he was at ease. They reminded him of what it was like with his friends back at school when he wasn't much of a loner. After months, for the first time he found himself missing it. He shook those nostalgic thoughts away and mingled with Shaun's friends like it wasn't the first time he had met them and he even felt himself laughing when they cracked jokes. From across the room, Joy smiled creepily at him-happy that Logan was enjoying himself.
Dinner was absolutely delicious with lemon and chilly roasted chicken, bread and potato crisps with garlicky parmesan sauce, sautéed mushrooms and other veggies and boiled noodles with gravy. It was an odd combination, but everything went well together. Dessert consisted of mango sorbet and a simple chocolate jar which contained sponge cake, chocolate mousse, cookie crumbs and nuts. The atmosphere was lively with Shaun's friends pulling an embarrassed Shaun's leg and his parents participating in the banter. Logan kept quiet, his focus on the sumptuous food in front of him despite of everyone's futile attempts at including him in their conversation.
Logan's mind was far, far away- the events of that tragic day playing in his mind. Joy's family had reminded him of his own dead family. His family hadn't been so close like Joy's family, but they were a family. He wouldn't have lost them if it weren't for that ghastly accident that occurred three years ago.
Logan vividly recalled that day- everything was plain and ordinary. Logan's parents had took his little brother for shopping and had asked him to come along, but Logan felt lazy. He decided to stay at home and playfully brushed his little brother away who was continuously chanting about getting new shoes.
His family left in the evening while Logan spent his time in the living room watching some random travel show on t.v. His grandma was chatting with a bunch of old ladies in their neighbourhood, it was sort of a routine. Time passed by normally as Logan ate his dinner and continued switching between channels to find something interesting. He would describe that day as mundane and nothing unusual. There was no warning- no signal as what was going to happen.
It was ten thirty in the night when he decided to call his grandma home. The neighbourhood ladies had no work except for gossiping all day and her grandma often got carried away. He called his grandma who promised him that she would be back in ten minutes.
Another half an hour passed by and suddenly the landline rung. Nobody used the landline- it was old and deserted. He didn't even know that it worked. That was the first time in the entire monotonous day where Logan felt suspicious. His worries instantly diverted to his grandma who wasn't home yet. He never thought that it was his family who were in peril because he knew that whenever they went shopping, they only came home by midnight.
The call from the hospital was a blur, but he remembered that they never mentioned to him on call that his parents had passed away on the spot. He had rushed to find his grandma who was next door, clueless and smiling. She had immediately understood him as they both hailed a cab and hurried to the hospital. The news of his parents was first dropped on them like a sudden explosion. The doctors stupidly gave them five minutes to recover before breaking the news that Logan's little brother was in a critical condition.
Logan and his grandma barely had the time to mourn for they were clinging to the last strings of hope for his baby brother. Three days went in turmoil as they kept themselves stronger, but it was a misfortune that his brother passed away too. He had succumbed to his injuries. Logan couldn't believe this, he didn't want to believe this.
Funeral was bleak and because of the little gap between his family's demise and the funeral, Logan didn't feel at peace. He definitely felt lighter during the funeral, but not completely. He was still disturbed, the heaviness still weighing on him.
There was only one time when he had considered killing himself, it was before the funeral. He was sitting in the yard, staring at the dark, clear sky and all the bottled up feelings came gushing out. He cried loudly, looked up at the sky and bargained with God. He asked God to give his family back in exchange for his life. At least, in exchange for his little brother's life. His brother had so much to see and live and Logan thought that his brother deserved to live more than him. The sick part of him believed that God would grant his wish as he actually considered strangling himself with his dead mum's scarf.
Then, he heard his grandma's calm voice from inside the house, "Logan dearie, are you alright?"
He wiped his tears hastily and tried to compose himself. "Yeah, all well."
"Come in love, dinner's ready," his grandma said and he could decipher the slight shake in her tone. In fact, his own voice was wavering. That was when it hit him, grandma needed him as much as he needed her. She had lost her daughter, her son-in-law and her grandson too yet she was keeping herself together for Logan. And he had to be brave for her too.
That was how two and a half years had passed by, sad yet hopeful, until his grandma passed away. And it was when he lost her, he considered to commit suicide again since nobody was there for him. That stopped when Joy came into his life, an actual ray of sunshine in his miserable, cold life.
Now as Logan looked around the room, he realized that all the people- big-hearted Joy, her cool dad, her benevolent mum, her grumpy grandpa, her quiet sister, her helpful brother and even his boisterous friends cared about him.
And that comforted Logan.
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A/N :
I hope you guys liked this chapter, I think it was important to give a little insight into Logan's past. I also hope that unintentionally there's no romanticising of any issues. Yes Joy came into Logan's life and he doesn't feel as bad as before, but it could have been anyone. As you see in the past, it was the grandma who had supported him. So it isn't like a girl miraculously cures a boy's mental illness or vice versa. Mini rant over lmao, happy reading!