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Harlow | Phoenix | Other people
"I think I'm slowly loosing my mind Harlow. I don't think you understand the hatred that I feel when I open my eyes and I see the same walls. I'm so fucking tired of this food it doesn't make any sense."
"When I think about deployment and boot camp food I imagine smashed food like baby squash and peas."
"I'm sure tv has helped a lot with that imagine."
"I know you've seen military movies before. So tell me. Is that not how they feed you?"
"We're not in prison Harlow so no. They do have good days but it's rare and it's usually a celebration of some kind."
"Like someone getting prompted?"
"More like the Marine Corps birthday or Navy's birthday."
"Is there cake involved?"
"Not in the few that I've been to here no but there was lobster and steak at the last one I went to. It was fucking amazing."
"What's your favorite meal?"
"Right now? Anything that's not served on this ship."
"Is it that bad?"
"It's that bland. So very very bland."
"You know I could make a joke about it being cooked by white people since rumor has it that they only use salt and pepper."
"Well rumor is wrong in my house - well my Aunt Justine's house. She seasons her food to perfection."
"I'm sure she does."
"You think I'm joking?"
"Not at all."
"Good because I'm giving you an invite now for whenever I do decide to go back for a visit and you can taste her food."
"How do you know I'll be available at the time? I do have a life you know."
"You wouldn't make time for me if I came to Indiana? Me? Your greatest friend in the world."
"Greatest friend, huh?"
"Hell yeah. We've talked every night for the past three weeks and I probably know more about you than anyone else."
"I don't know about that . . ."
"Okay then. Ask me something about yourself."
"Okay. Let me think . . . . "
" . . . . "
" . . . . "
"Well I mean today Harlow we only have thirty more minutes to talk."
"I'm thinking don't rush me."
"Ughhh."
"Okay I got something."
"Hit me with it."
"What's my hair type?"
"What?"
"My hair type. You know like my hair texture. How loose or tight are my natural coils?"
" . . . . "
"Got you on the first question! One point Harlow zero Phoe-"
"I asked what because a group of people came in and I didn't really hear you but since you did repeat yourself I can give my answer now . . . I remember one time we were on the phone and you were up doing your hair putting them into what were they called? . . . I think bantu knots and you said that your arms were tired because your hair was so thick and you hated having such tight coils. You said and I quote, 4c hair shouldn't exists because it's so hard to mange sometimes . . . and because I am a man with zero knowledge about women's hair I didn't know what they hell you were talking about like what the hell is 4c? The only thing I've heard remotely close to that is High-C so I locked that little bit of information about you away in the upstairs chamber and asked Prichett about it after we got off the phone."
" . . . . "
"So I believe the score is one point Phoenix to the nada that you have."
" . . . . "
"Feeling a little speechless Harlow?"
"N-no. Not really - I mean of course not you just surprised me that you remembered."
"Why wouldn't I? Things I learn about you are safely stored in its own place in my brain."
"If it wasn't so early in the morning I would say that you were trying to sweet talk me Phoenix."
"Well it's not early over here so I would say you're right."
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Motionless in bed my mind was still awake after Phoenix and I got off the phone. He had actually been flirting with me and I was completely speechless. I wouldn't call myself a flirtatious person but I knew how to give some decent comebacks when I guy gave you a line but with Phoenix, I couldn't. My heart was pounding in my chest while my brain was sparking like the beginning of a fire in a outlet plug.
Failing to get myself together and calmly speak to him without biting my tongue or saying something stupid I forgot to ask him about possibly video chatting sometime soon.
We had been talking every morning for almost a month learning things about each other like two close friends would. Even though Phoenix compliments my pictures on Instagram as I did his, we could only be just friends.
"It was too early to think of anything more."
Right?
I value what we have going on right now and it wasn't like he would be moving back to Indiana after deployment anyways. His home was in California. Miles and miles away from where I lived.
What would happen if he wanted to be more than friends? Would I be able to do a long distance relationship? Would I have to work two job just to safe up and fly out to se him? Would he want me to meet his Aunt Justine without him? What if I already met her? It wasn't impossible since I worked in a beauty store. People come and go on the daily. They were just faces that became a blur until something happened that made me remember them like Timara.
Was I thinking too far?
I should just slow down.
I should really get some sleep.
It was almost three in the morning and I did have to work plus I had plans to see a movie with Timara later on so I needed to rest . . .
It's just that I was sure I was developing feelings for Phoenix that weren't within friendship guidelines.
How could I be falling for someone I haven't even meet?
I really needed to close my eyes but I knew that Phoenix would be on the other side. I kept dreaming about him sitting in a computer chair with Prichett nearby swaying the chair side to side as he laughing in the phone about something I said. From the picture online I had an idea of what he looked like in cammies but I wasn't sure if he wore the light colored ones or the dark green ones. In my dream he wore the green ones and he looked just as handsome as he did in his Instagram pictures.
"Uuugh!" I rolled over burying my face in the pillow.
Go to sleep Harlow.
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