Yoongi trudged along the empty side walk, opting to walk instead of taking the bus as usual to the library. The only reason why he decided to walk, was because he needed to think about what he wanted to say to Namjoon when he got there. This was crucial, a now or never last stand in hope of him earning back the love that he so foolishly threw away. Sure it was kind of far for him to walk, but when lost in his thoughts, time seemed to pass by quickly.
He continued down his path with the sun hot on his back, thinking and thinking until he had no idea what to think about. His thoughts were all jumbled and nothing seemed right to say. Namjoon deserved better than any of the words he could muster up.
Namjoon deserved better than him.
Yoongi shook himself out of his self-deprecating mindset, because this wasn't about him. For once in his life, he has the chance to fix his mistakes that was caused by his pride and ego. He wasn't going to mess this up. He couldn't.
He tried again to concentrate, but he couldn't break loose from the what if's.
What if he doesn't what me back? What if he never wants to see me again? What if I'm too weak to face him? After all, I'm far too weak to face even myself.
Yoongi thought back to a time before he knew Namjoon. He was a shell full of rage, at the world and at those who he cared about the most. He felt so alone on the small rock he floated on through the vast emptiness of space, despite the problem of overpopulation. Never again did he want to relapse to that time. He was an awful person, one who even though everyone can relate to at times, he was stuck in the same mantra for as long as he can remember. Namjoon was the one who broke that routine. He had to stay strong for Namjoon.
He reached into the pocket of his black leather jacket, and pulled out his phone, along with some headphones. With his music streaming through his ear buds, he wouldn't have noticed that he almost passed his destination if it hadn't been for a raindrop splashing onto his cheek when he looked up at the now gloomy sky. Yoongi looked both ways, then crossed the street. He opened the large doors he was met with at the entrance, and stepped inside just before he heard the first crack of thunder. Luck was seemingly on his side for once, because he made it in before a heavyrainfall descended from the cloudy sky.
This seems familiar, he thought. At least this time I didn't get soaked.
Upon going to the front desk, he was met by a man, one of who wasn't Namjoon.
"Can I help you with something, Yoongi?" the black haired man asked him.
"Oh um, you might be able to. Just give me a second."
"Sure, take as long as you need". The man answered with a heart-shaped smile.
Yoongi searched the library for Namjoon, looking from back and front, front to back. He even noticed a stairwell near the side of the building which lead to a second floor of the library.
So many books. No wonder Joon still works here by himse- he realized mid-thought that there was another library worker there for once. It took him another second for him to realize that he addressed him by his name.
The blonde rushed down to the first floor, and asked the guy at the front desk,
"Do I know you?"
"Well I don't know, do you?" was the cheeky response he was given.
"Well I don't know, would I be asking you that if I knew?" Yoongi was beginning to get frustrated. No Namjoon in sight, and now this prick answering his question with half-assed replies.
"Think back to the last time you were here. Or is your memory really that bad?"
" Okay, listen here you little piece of shit- OH. OH. OH MY GOD YOU'RE THE GUY NAMJOON WAS KISSING."
"Bingo."
"THEN WHY THE FUCK DIDN'T YOU TELL ME YOU'RE HIS BOYFRIEND IN THE FIRST PLACE? IF YOU WORK HERE YOU'D KNOW THAT I ONLY COME TO SEE NAMJOON." Yoongi lost his ability to contain himself (quicker than I,the author, lost my will to live).
"Ew, no. That's gross. Why would I date him? He's literally the last person I would ever want to be near." Hoseok cringed.
"Okay first of all, don't say that about him. Second of all, why were you two sucking on each others faces of that's the case?"
"I mean like, I would rather suck on your face, but I had to make do with what I had at the time." He said with wink.
"Wait what? Okay, I am beyond confusion at this point. You need to be like America and explain what the hell is going on here."
"So, basically I think you're cute and we need to hook up. Forget about Namjoon. You're way too good for him anyway."
Yoongi was seriously about to fight the man across from him, even if that meant that he'd have to jump over the desk to stop to do it.
"HELLO SNEKY SNEKS! I'VE HEARD QUITE ALOT ABOUT YOU TWO AND I THINK WE NEED TO HAVE A LITTLE CHAT." A man said with a grin that made him resemble a bunny.
He was soon playfully shoved by his partner who scolded him,
"Jungkookie, what did I tell you about yelling? We're in a library. Keep your voice down."
"Sorry. My bad, Jiminie. Anyways, it's nice to meet the two people who have been causing our Namjoon pain."
"Who's a snake? I hate snakes. And why is it always 'Namjoon, Namjoon, Namjoon'? Like can we not talk about something interesting for once?" Hoseok said with a bored expression.
Yoongi grabbed him by his collar, pulling him closer,
"If I hear Namjoon's name come out of your mouth one more time, you might not be able to talk about anything ever again."
" I know that I said I wanted to be close to you, but right now this is a little too close. I should've figured that you wouldn't have lived up to your looks if someone like him loved you." Hoseok said, breaking Yoongi's grip on his shirt, and putting as much distance between them as he could.
"As much as I would really like to see you get your face pounded in, I'm pretty sure that's not what I said we had to get sorted out. You both need to apologize to Namjoon." Jimin said, with a deadly calm expression.
"Why should I apologize to him?" Hoseok said.
"Because if you don't, I'll let Jungkook here do what he's been wantingto do."
"Physical force isn't a very good persuader. Shouldn't the apology come from my own heart?" Hoseok reasoned.
"For some reason, I don't think you have one. How about you, Yoongi? You've been quiet. Do you have the same perspective as Hoseok?" Jungkook asked the blonde.
"No, that's not it. I came here to talk to Namjoon, and to ask him for forgiveness but there might be a minor problem to that."
"And what is that?" The couple questioned in unison.
"He's not here."
"What do you mean he's not here? He left before us, telling us that he had to get to his shift earlier than usual today, despite us telling him not to come in ever." Jimin said worriedly.
"He didn't show up today. I thought he'd never come back again, to be honest." said Hoseok, usefully for once.
Jungkook called Namjoon, and put it to speaker. The phone rang, and the dial tone could be heard throughout the empty library walls.
"Please pick up." Jimin said after a while.
"Hello?" the voice on the other line answered.
"Thank goodness. Namjoon? Where are you? We're worried about you." Jungkook told him.
"Is Jimin there with you?"
"Yeah, I'm here, Joon." Jimin spoke up.
"Well I wanted to tell you this a bit later, but I guess now is fine."
There was a long pause of silence, causing Jungkook to speak.
"Joon? Are still there?"
"Yup."
"What is it?"
"It's just that I....I'm.." he sounded close to breaking, his voice already cracking as if his unshed tears which held his composure together had started to fall.
"I'm leaving. Before you try to stop me, I'm already at the train station and my train comes soon. I'll come visit once in awhile. And I gave the landlord the last of my rent."
"Namjoon no. Please don't go."
"Is that....is that Yoongi?"
"Yes, it's me."
"I'm so sorry for everything, all of you. I truly am. I think my train is here. I need to go. Goodbye."
A click ended the phone call.
The 4 men were left stunned in deafening silence.
No, only 3 of them were left stunned, and for once Hoseok was a part of that number.
"I don't know about you guys, but I'm not going to fucking let the man I love leave, without even letting me apologize." Yoongi stated.
"You can't be serious. He said his train had already arrived. There's no way we can catch up to him." Hoseok said.
"I've never been more serious about anything in my entire life. Not to mention that based on the history of the time I've lived so far, my whole life has lead up until this moment, and I'm not going to waste it." he said, and left the library, going out into the pouring rain.
Jungkook and Jimin looked at each other and shrugged. Their friend had never given up on them, so why would they give up on him when he needed them the most? They refused to vanish from his life. They followed Yoongi out the door.
"Wait!" A voice said before they could leave, "I can't leave the library during opening hours even though it's empty right now. Can you please tell him I'm sorry?"
"What's with the sudden change of heart? You can tell him yourself when we bring him back." Jimin said, leaving Hoseok all alone to think about his wrong doings.
The couple got into their car and drove until they saw a figure walking on the side walk. They slowed down and rolled the window down to talk to him.
"Hey, where are you going? You're never going to make it there in time if you walk. Get in." Jungkook said from the car.
Yoongi got inside of the car. The car sped down the street for a couple of minutes, with him anxiously bouncing his knees up and down the whole ride.
"Don't cry, Kookie. We'll get there and stop him from leaving." Jimin tried to comfort his crying boyfriend, wiping his tears away with one hand while the other's on the wheel.
"I'm not crying. And even if I was, it's because I don't want my life to go back to how it was before I met him. " the youngest said biting at his bottom lip.
"I understand, but we have to try. For him. Thankfully, we're already here."
The party of three parked the car and walked up to the crowded station infront of them. Even if they knew what train he was going to get on, how would they know where he was?
"Okay, let's split up. You two should go in one direction and I'll go in the other." Yoongi said.
"That's not a good idea. Let's all just go together." Jungkook suggested.
"What if he doesn't want to see me?" asked Yoongi.
"Now's not the time to doubt yourself. You came this far, and it's already too late to turn back. I think I see purple hair near platform 9." Jimin replied, pointing in the direction of said platform.
They rushed towards a tall man, who did in fact have purple hair, and two dimples as deep as the sea which they all loved in someway or form.
"HEY, NAMJOON!" Jimin called out to him, waving his arms in the air. Jungkook soon followed suit.
He turned to them, looking startled as they approached him.
"What are you two doing here?" Namjoon asked the men standing infront of him.
"You two?"
They hadn't realized that Yoongi was caught behind a crowd of people boarding their train.
"Yes, you two. I didn't want to worry you guys, so I wanted to leave quietly."
"Why are you so dense? Of course we're going to worry about you no matter where you go. You're not a friend, Namjoon. You're family." Jungkook said, pulling him into a hug.
Jimin joined in, turning it into a group hug, and glaring at the people who gave them strange looks. What's so weird about a couple of grown men crying while hugging each other at a train station?
"I'm so sorry. I just have no idea what to do." Namjoon said, trying to calm himself down.
"How about I apologize and you go from there?" A deep voice asked. The same deep voice that caused him to flee in the first place.
"We're just going to wait by the car to give you two some space." said Jimin, leaving the two by themselves among many strangers.
"So...Namjoon. I'm sorry for hurting you." Yoongi began.
"You're sorry? Is that all you have to say? You know what? I've blamed myself for everything that has happened so far. I kept asking myself, "How could you do that to him, Namjoon? Why do you just assume that he has feelings for you when he clearly doesn't?""
" Namjoon, I-" Namjoon cut him off.
"No. I need to tell you how I've been feeling. You think that I would just instantly forgive you? That you try to walk back in my life after walking out so many times, acting so cold to me since the beginning and I'm just supposed to wait patiently for your return? You've hurt me, Min Yoongi, and I have no idea how to fix myself at this point."
Yoongi took Namjoon's silence as his turn to speak,
"Namjoon, I love you. That's a really shitty thing to say right now but I truly do. With you, I've messed up everytime since I've met you and I keep on messing up. You don't have to forgive me now, tomorrow, or even in a year, but I want you to know that I will keep on trying. I will keep being here for you no matter what until I've earned back your trust, and long after that as well. Please, I know you've given me numerous chances, which I've wasted in the past, but if you let me have one more I'll try to build our future."
"Okay."
"I understand if you don't want to."
"I said okay. I'll give you a chance. But don't think that I'm just going to put up with you being an asshole again. Even now, I don't think you love me. And the funniest thing ever is that I still love you, despite you not showing it by acting indifferent to me." Namjoon lowered his gaze,
"I find it funny,
How I fell in love with you
While hating myself."
"Namjoon, I do. I do love you so, so much, and I promise that I'll do everything in my power to show you how much of an amazing person you are. I want to spend the rest of my life with you. No, I NEED to spend the rest of my life with you. I've tried before to give you up so that I wouldn't have to feel, but you're my everything." Yoongi reached up to Namjoon's face, guiding his head down to his for a kiss.
The kiss lasted for a few seconds, but to them it felt like an eternity. After all they've been through, the soft, sweet kiss eased the bitterness, serving as the start of a new beginning.
"OH MY GOSH I DIDN'T THINK THEY WOULD ACTUALLY DO- OOF"
"SHHHH KEEP IT DOWN JUNGKOOK! YOU'RE RUINING THE MOOD."
Yoongi and Namjoon broke the kiss to laugh at the other two's antics with their foreheads still touching to keep them connected.
"Are we official?", asked Namjoon.
"That's only if you'd give me the honour of having you as my boyfriend."
"Of course I want you. I've always wanted you, ever since that day you came into the library seeking shelter from the rain."
"Oh, speaking of library, let's go back, Namjoon. Hoseok wants to talk to you too."
"He does? Am I fired? I probably am, aren't I?"
"You might as well quit. You basically did your job and the job of 3 other people. Plus I know of a cute little cafe that would love a cute new barista."
"I would like that very much. Let's go before those two continue to freak out."
Namjoon, Yoongi, Jimin, and Jungkook left the train station, each couple holding each other's hand.the rain had stopped, and the drive to the library was peaceful compared to what happened earlier. There was no immediate rush, yet Namjoon still felt at unease about facing Hoseok.