My King part one.
You're my crown.
The one who turns my frown upside down.
My King who brings out the Queen in me.
You're my sky, when it's raining inside.
Mi amor.
Nothing less than me corazon.
Not giving you too much props for what you do, letting you know I love you....cuz your just you.
The world wasn't so bright till you shined your light.
You're my dream woken up.
Ex thug got me in love.
You're my angel sent from my creator.
My destined opportunity to make a new start.
I only want to kiss your heart.
Keep it safe from harm.
I'm not trying to be your bodyguard.
Only make you shine like gold.
Let you feel things you don't know.
You're my King, I'm your Queen.
With our attitude, we can accomplish anything.
Imagine us put together, we would make royalty.
Hopefully one day the world can see.
Now I want to focus on us.
Making this last till death do us part.
Ashes to ashes dust to dust.
******
Written 4/13/04, @ 7:21 pm
Sweet romances, love enhances.
How divine.
The world is mine.
Hold my hand, as you grow up to be a man.
When you begin to give up, you'll be held up.
Your heart won' crumble as long as you stay untouchable.
Your tears don't touch the ground, just your lips.
Salty as the sweat on your fingertips.
Love doesn't have to hurt.
You can make happiness without saying a word.
It's the actions that make the attractions, the attraction is what gives you compassion and compassion makes you devoted.
Then you realize why most are holding.
Not to cuddle but to some how become one another.
And when you have to let go don't forget, there's just things in life that you have left.
****
Running never worked until now.
Not until now did it feel right.
I can't ever no matter what, ever be happy here.
Not God , not money and not you.
I'm taking my loves and possessions and going away.
Not to hurt or spite anyone.
I just can't do it anymore.
Seeing the same people.
Doing the same shi- for 21 years.
Something has to change.
I'm only doing it to make me happy.
Tired of being treated like a dumbas-.
Stupid parents.........
(never finished it. Not sure why.)
*****
Love on paper.
I'm a hopeless romantic.
So much love to give, no one to share it with.
Find my paper and share it with you.
Now you're my love, my only devotion, my mute.
I'll bring out my words you will listen so silently.
Peaceful and calm, you could just write me.
No words come forth like ours on chords. My sentimental feeling couldn't be bored.
A feeling fare, not cold understanding.
By only being closed, an ending so sweet, like saying I love you through me.
*****
Tempting you.
Tell me what you feel.
Is it love or is it not yet real?
I could make it worth your wild.
Put all your thoughts aside and stop being in denial.
Take you into my world, show you what is better.
Slowly lay you down on smooth leather.
Close your eyes, kiss your lips.
Then touch your face.
Now let you lick my fingertips.
Do I have you under my spell?
Am I close enough to be in your dreams at night?
Honestly would you tell?
I only wish for your love.
Something new and true that feels like it came from above.
****
Written 1/30/04 @ 12:12 am.
Deep path.
Where the road takes you; no one knows.
Where your heart leads you; sometimes hard to show.
Love and passion is nothing like we would imagine.
It all usually being with that first look, her skin...so smooth. His eyes....so blue.
Feeling like you fell in love to soon.
Knowing it might hurt but not wanting to let go.
She's too sweet and he's too unique.
It's a long road. Just follow; 1 ½ way there, you feel old.
Tired, bored, alone. Secluded like you lost your place to go.
Beginning to wonder if it was your mind or your heart you followed.
Doesn't really matter, the path got rough. It became a strain. Your chest is in a different type of pain.
Your mind, heart, soul and train of thought will never be the same.
Wanting the other person to see how you cry or die inside.
Recognizing that the life you led as become something that as a hunger that hasn't been fed.
Sometimes you've imagined folks telling you 'You're emotionally dead.'
that's when maybe you have begun to feel loves wrath.
A drowsing teasing that feels like it will always last.
I've always noticed I hate to love.
So then I see that I love to hate.
It never stops. One love after another.
It has become something you need to have.
You brought yourself to the endless deep path.
*****
I haven't had good nights sleep since- well since I was me.
My head never lays to rest.
I continue to wonder has all other's dream's begin to manifest.
My eyes stay open till the sky brightens but I never see a sunrise.
Every night and day I wait for the sky to fall.
Seeing those on their hands and knees, unable to crawl.
When I dream its just constant pain, heartache and shame.
Reliving it all over and over again. Scared to continue to cry myself to sleep, someone might hear.
Pretend to wonder what's wrong with me.
I'm slowly addicted to death. Dreaming isn't how I want to rest.
Being awake isn't how I want to be seen.
****
No one can tell you.
Left out in the dark.
Hoping for the light.
All seems to be too far.
Sometimes wanting to give up.
Thinking that dreams are a must. It's been too long to continue to cry.
Settling to lose seems now to be a way of life.
Waiting for a hand to pull you out.
Waiting is taking so long. I rather not; then to be let down. Darkness is your light.
Staying in the shadows is your cover.
Putting aside what comes out right. Only focus on what comes out wrong.
No one can tell you all the things you string along.
No one can tell you other wise.
All there words you've always despised.
Don't need anyone to tell you when it's time to move on.
You know when you're ready and you know when you're done.
***
Love devotion.
A love devotion.
It holds me near.
Love is wrong.
My hearts in despair.
Words I want to hear.
Hurt it causes.
Pain I want to refuse.
Loneliness I continue to endure.
When will you stop? I can ask.
*****
(These were just notes but I figured I would post since paper is getting old.)
****
Heavy with memories.
Sitting promises to that picture, remember darkness
Found moon
Tomorrow
Perfect above night
Yes the air
Plain star with last end.
*****
(Notes.)
*****
I've dreamed of you a few times.
You always tell me how much you care.
It hurts to know you're not alive.
And that you'll never be there.
****
Love as brought me to such a place.
The sins of my heart gave me a love.
It doesn't want or need my satisfaction.
Touching of m skin to it doesn't help breath.
I can't open the eyes of someone who's blind.
But my sin as brought me to it.
I sit alone abandon my home.
Waiting for a sign.
But no one is mine.
Thoughts we don't share.
Memories we don't have.
Promises that fail.
Yet my sin has brought me to it.
****
(Kids scribbled over this one so going to try to copy it.)
Something I never felt.
Your smile melts into my skin. The smell of your touch.
Something I never felt.
How I love you so much. You're my guardian angel. The things you do, my heart does not understand how it's able. I need your presence every time I blink.
My mind doesn't want to wander. It's all I think. Hold me close, keep in your touch so near.
Maybe I can feel your heart.
****
Why do we ask each other these questions why?
The answers never come.
People as why do we die?
Others may ask why do we live?
The reasons are never shown.
Why do nigga's cheat and girls hoe?
Why do we smoke and cops arrest innocent souls?"
Why do middle-aged people drive and older people take the bus?
The answer isn't known.
Why do I love you and you love her?
Why when I ask you who you need, you don't know?
Why do my poems start off cheesy then end up strong?
Like a box of wheeties.
I won't ever know, well maybe one day it's just not today.
****
(This poem was awesome but it's ripped but I am going to try to fill in the missing words.)
You talk about two doves.
Flying over your eyes is the sunrise.
Has you smile at me I begin to sigh. Thinking of them rainy days, how you washed them away.
But now they are coming back.
It's like a haunt that causes an attack.
I still say a thug made me better but now things are worse.
I'd rather be dead in a fu--in a hurse.
You don't hold me or call me Ma, you just poke fun at all the things you want.
Even if I cry you don't dry my eyes. You just tell me to look at you cuz this is better.
What happen to the love that we used to have? It's like it all went away.
You say your friends are better then your family.
You're mentally emotionally really killing me.
You're my angel but I took your wings.
I was your sweetie but you took my halo.
To be with you it's like a fu--in favor.
With no remorse I start to walk.
Only because you ain't there and we can't start to talk.
You're hurting me.
You know but you don't know.
I'm telling you your love needs to be shown. My inside is getting old.
(Angry how it came out o well.)
****
The words in a song can sound so sweet.
Keeping you lifted like your feet..
In your dream.
Cold wind blows quickly upon your face. Smothering your breathe. It follows where your feet are placed.
(Notes.)
*****
Then I met you.
Breathless
days became so
overwhelming.
With no one by my
Side to depend on. "Then I
Met you."
Heartache became unbearable.
The hurt didn't have a cure. Until I
Held you.
My eyes were so blind, I couldn't find my
Self. All was dark. Till I saw you.
I wasn't able to have my own thoughts. My mind was
Taken over. I couldn't think, until I dreamed of you.
My place didn't have a meaning. I wasn't able to say.
No one was able to know. Then I spoke with
You.
I couldn't let go. Wanted to leave, but needed to stay.
I was alone. Only when you were not by my side.
Being with you as given me life. With you by my
Side to depend on. Heartache is bearable since I found a
Cure. My eyes are open since I found myself with you.
****
Shadows tossed across waters.
The sea image slowly shimmering from horizon drifted downward. Tomorrow will end with love.
(Notes)
****
Jasiah's cry. (My son)
The first day; you haven't stopped smiling, since I looked at your face.
You always look so happy. You don't know yet what the world brings.
Could be because you're seeing a better side of things.
Your smile, so precious with dimples and all. Makes my life seem so simple.
So grateful that I have you, so thankful I never lost you.
When you sometimes cry; fills my mind with tears. My eyes with pain. Makes me wish I could lay gods hands upon your face.
I hope the best for your life. Not to follow the wrong things it may lie. Hoping its long hoping it's good. Hopefully you'll remember how much mommy loves you.
****
Loving is pain.
Love is a despise. With all that it has its been given its rights.
Nothing stops your heart from dieing.
You devoted your life. You never stopped trying.
The only credit you get for it, is the one with a overdue balance.
Steps were made, steps were taken.
Time stood still, all was quiet. Only sound was of your heart breaking.
Then the feeling came, the feeling of our world falling.
It's so known but never seems to get old.
Just give it a few days, soon the pain will go away. Those are lies. When you're here again you'll remember how you weren't laughing.
You couldn't walk, your body was dragging.
So the next time you want to love, think of all the pain you have to let provide.
If you're willing to go threw that, your ready to start your life.
****