(So dang cute! love her adorableness 😍😊^^^)
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Zac told me Pav will be back tomorrow & Willem, the day after that. My nerves are getting to me about the whole idea of seeing them. I'm hoping Pav doesn't want to punish me badly or Willem for that matter. Maybe they've calmed down. I mean they kidnapped me over a week ago. Isn't that enough time to calm down & rethink abusing someone.
Besides, wherever they are, they're probably sleeping with women left & right. It's not like they should have pent up sexual frustration. I know they claim they're safe according to Zac, but if I get an STD, I'm killing all of them..or more likely going to wish I could. I don't have time for that crap.
Anyway, today I've been with the girls all day. I've been in the media room with them. I found the room yesterday evening. It's so peaceful & I dont think anyone knows where I am. I'm sure they know I'm in the house of coarse, but it's a big house & the only people here are Warren doing whatever he's doing, the guy Darik that I thought was gone, but turns out he just comes & goes a lot, and Dana doing whatever she's doing.
I haven't seen the guy Darik, since I stabbed him & I don't want to see him either just in case he's holding a major grudge. I mean I know I would. It's not as easy to turn the other cheek & forgive when a person's physically scared you or tried to kill you. I should know. If anyone ask me, I'm going to deny admitting I was willing to kill him to get away. My story is I just wanted to cut him, so I had enough time to escape with the girls. If I say it enough times to myself, maybe it will come accross as true
I don't know where Clai & V went. I asked Warren & he told me they left. Maybe it was something I said, or maybe the guys thought he was probably going to kill me. I don't know. They don't tell me much.
Warren came through with my hair products & even brought Remie & Aiva more diapers, bath wash & onsies. I was surprised. I'm mad that they don't have their own room anymore. All their things are probably just sitting there collecting dust.
I can't believe I went through all the work of trying to keep my daughter's safe away from knowing they had maniac slave trading dads & here I am back to square one. I tried so hard to keep them safe, make them a pretty room hustling to make it pretty & now they sleep with Dana while I'm forced to sleep in Zac's bed. Me & my girls are nomads in the house, since they haven't given me a room.
So far my peaceful alone places that I feel pretty safe are the gym room, surprisingly Warren's room & the media room im in now.
(Media room ^^^)
The Media room had a large couch in the back that went from wall to wall. With lots of pillows. They also had two lounge beds & two jumbo bean bags near the lounge beds. The whole room looked comfortable. I planned to make it my secret room of peace. I wondered if the doors locked but I hadnt checked yet.
Before I came in here, I made myself a sandwhich with chips & popcorn on the side for later. I ate a vegetable scramble before coming in. I got 2 bottles of water & some protein bars the guys had. This is definitely not the most healthy meal. But at least I took some vitamins that Warren got for me & there's lettuce on my sandwhich. As anyone could tell, I was planning on being in here alone with them all day.
I miss grocery shopping for myself. Maybe I can convince the guys to let me go one day. I know even if they said yes, they'd keep my girls here. So I'd have to come back & not try to escape. After last time they took me out, I know they'd watch me like a hawk too.
I feel alone in this house which is bad & good. I'd rather feel alone with my girls, then with smothered with the guys here. In this current moment I'm happy. Remie & Aiva are enjoying me too.
I was talking to the babies playing with them on the large couch. They liked laying there & I was super comfortable too. I'd mastered my baby talking voice with them. "Yes you luv mama don't you." They smiled as I smiled at them. "You're so sweet. I luv you so much. Yes I do". They were making noises at me & so happy. I'm happy they still know who their mom is, since I don't get to see them all very often. I hate that Zac makes me stay with him when he's here.
By the time he leaves in the morning, Dana has already given them formula & layed them back down. Then they're sleepy when I want them with me. Other times this week Zac would come home & tell her to watch them because his horny gene takes over & he feels I'm his living blowup doll or something. Later he makes me stay with him is his room.
Today, he left early & I took the girls happily from Dana's room. She seemed surprised & had the nerve to ask me if Zac said it was ok for me to take them. I seriously wanted to punch her in her face. She obviously forgot who's kids these are. That scorched the bridge we could've had between each other. I don't know if I want to try with her anymore.
I was playing with the girls singing to them & in walked Dana. I guess she searched each room til she found me or asked Warren or Darik, that most likely know where I was hours ago.
She surprised me when I saw her walk in. "Hi um I was wondering if you wanted me to take the girls for you" she said walking closer like she expected the answer to be yes. I wanted to say get the heck away from us & go somewhere else, but I didn't go there. I was nice besides adding a little reminder in my reply
"No that's ok. They're my kids, so I'll take care of them....thanks though." I didn't even look at her, I just kept smiling with them. I was honestly still mad that she expected me to ask Zac permission to take my own kids.
"Ok...um are you mad at me or somthin"she said stopping herself from walking out the door.
Why couldn't she just leave. I didn't feel like explaining my feeling to her right then. I guess now was as good a time as any to let it out. "Well actually yes, a little bit. I don't see what makes you think of have to ask any of the guys permission to see my own kids."
"They are my kids & if I want to take them, I dont think you should be trying to stop me."
She looked at me like she wasn't happy at all with what she was hearing. "I'm sorry. I was told to watch the babies until one of the guys said it was ok to bring them to you. I didn't want to get in trouble. You must know what happens when we don't do what we're told to"
She walked closer as she talked. " I really didn't mind watchin them. They were good & it gives me somethin to do, other then clean, cook, & watch tv".
I looked at her as she talked. I was sitting with my legs wide open. The girls were laying between my legs. I was wearing the short black romber the guys have me before. I had one of my fingers in Remie's left hand and Aiva's right hand.
Dana was right. I couldn't completely blame her. I do know what happens when the guys feel we've been "disobedient". What made them think grown women needed their discipline. "Yes I know what happens, but it's how you said it. Did you really think I'd ask Zac for my kids. You could've just said what he told you "
"Yeah I know. I'm sorry. I didn't want to get in trouble" she added looking down at them.
I looked at her. Looking at them. Maybe she's not a jerk like I was thinking. She had watched them while I was literally tied up. But I had no choice on that matter. Maybe I can get some information from her. "How long have you been here Dana"
"Um I've been here about a month"
" Well thank you for taking care of the girls when I couldn't. You've done a good job since I've been here." I figured the only way to get anything from her, was to be nice. Besides it might be good to have someone on my side. She didn't seem far gone loyal like V. She just seems like she wants to follow the rules. I just need to find out what those rules are for her.
"How long have you been with the guys or better question. When we're you taken...were you taken or did you chose to be here for some reason"
"I was taken early December last year. I was grabbed while walkin home from work late. Turns out they had been watchin me a while before they got me. No & yes on choosin to be here. I didn't like the alternative option."
"Wow. Where are you from? " I guessed the alternative was being sold. I'd choose working too over being sold away
"I'm from New Mexico, but they moved me to Nevada after they got me. So what's your story? I've heard the guys talk about you a lot since I've been here." She sat down in one of the bean bags closest to the door
What did they do stand around talking about me while I was gone. That's a bit sad, they need real lives, I thought.
"Well I used to work with Zac. He was one of my closest friends. We'd known each other over 2 years. We hung out with each other all the time. He came to my house & I went to his apartment all the time. I trusted him.
I met Pavel after he came to the hotel I worked at. We started dating soon after that. " I smiled at the thought of how sweet he was. "He was so sweet & romantic. You knew what to say & how to act to make me fall for him. He drugged me one date night at his house. They tricked me into trusting both of them. The only one that was a jerk since the beginning was Willem. Turned out he was the least evil of all of them, even though not by much" I got caught up in telling all about them to her. I zoned back in looking at the girls.
"Man, that's messed up" she said shaking her head slowly
"Yeah I know. The only good thing I got from them were these sweeties right here & that was by mistake. I don't know why they can't let me be free. I'm no one special. I'm just your average woman from Texas. I don't have a magic-" I looked at the girls then at Dana "I don't have some magic you-know-what like they make me out to have"
She smiled at me. I got up to get the diapers from their bags after I checked them. "I can help change them if you want"
I looked at her a bit surprised "Ok sure. I won't refuse help with diapers" I slightly laughed
She changed Aiva & I changed Remie.
I thanked her, before she threw the dirty ones away in the hallway bathroom.
"Where did you learn to take care of kids?" I asked
"I used to babysit a lot as a teenager & I took a CPR class in high school. I'm 20 so it's still pretty fresh in my mind."
"That's good to know. So are the guys nice to you here. I see they gave you a TV at least"
"Yeah, they tend to leave me alone. If I follow the rules I get rewarded. If I don't, I get punished... I try to just follow the rules"
"So what are the rules?"
She paused "Um pretty much to Cook meals, clean up a bit. They're pretty good with cleaning behind themselves, so I just dust & stuff. Take care of things when asked & just stuff."
"So do they ever let you leave here- like to go to the store"
"Um yeah they took me to the store a few times. Like 2 times to go shopping for clothes"
"Yeah I see you don't look like they dress you, so have you ever tried to run away, you know go see your family or something"
"Well I thought about it once then changed my mind. I hadn't talked to my parents in over 7 months before this... I should get back to work stuff. I need to go start on dinner" she seemed like my questions hit a sore spot. She stood up and walked to the door.
"Ok well thank you for helping me change the girls" I'm glad I got some information from her about who she is. The more I know her, maybe the closer I can get to finding a way out of here with my girls.
"Yeah no problem. Thank you for the talk. It's pretty lonely here with just the guys, because I'm not having conversations with any of them if I can help it" she said
"Yep I know what you mean, but Warren doesn't seem as bad as the other guys" I said waiting for a reply on her opinion
"Yeah but he's still one of them. He would choose them over either of us in a heart beat."
She left the room as I started feeding the girls.
I finished feeding the girls, got to eat my food & put them to sleep. I layed on the outside of the big sofa facing them. I cleared some pillows off around us & slept with them next to me. I was happy for all the time I got to spend with them during the day. Even just laying there with them made me happy. I watched them sleep until I fell asleep with them.
I woke up to the feeling of being man handled. I looked and the girls were gone from beside me. The carriers I brought them in were gone. I began to freak out & scream as they put a black hood over my head before I could see who it was. I don't know why since I know all of them. I didn't know what time it was because there was no light in the movie room
"Let me go! What are you doing! Where are my daughter's! What have you done with them! "
"Don't worry. They're safer then you're going to be" is all the voice said. I think it was Darik's voice.
I was pulled up kicking & screaming. They stuck me in the arm with their signature needle that I hate. I kept fighting trying to get free
"Please bring me back my girls. What's going on. Don't do this, let me go" I sounded like a broken record until my legs grew weak & I was out minutes later.