Here I Stand (BWWM) (AMBW) [C...

By delta_215

23.5K 930 38

For those who forgot how it feels to be loved, for those who need reminding, for those whose heart need a bre... More

Presentation
Characters pt. 1
Chapter one: How everything started
Chapter two: The best gift ever
Chapter three: Violet
Chapter four: Home
Chapter five: When everything falls down
Chapter six: Knock, Knock Get the Door it's Depression
Chapter seven: T is for Trauma
Chapter eight: Relapse
Chapter nine: Dating, and marriage
Chapter ten: Blind dates?!
Chapter eleven: Coping mechanism
Chapter twelve: The words I failed to say
Chapter thirteen: Last shot
Chapter fourteen: Do you love me Sir?
Chapter fifteen: Let me heal you, let me love you
Chapter sixteen: That one time I tried to save the world
Chapter seventeen: The things we don't forget
Chapter eighteen: Drama, drama and Romance?!
Chapter nineteen: Drama, drama and Romance?! (part 2)
Chapter twenty: The Boys are here
Chapter twenty one : A true person, MY PERSON
Chapter twenty two: Hello stranger
Chapter twenty three: Love me when it hurts
Chapter twenty-four: The things we do for love
Chapter twenty five: First date
Chapter twenty six: Teach me how to love
Chapter twenty seven: Somebody Once Told Me the World Was Gonna Kill me
Chapter twenty eight: No Touchy please
Chapter twenty nine: Top 10 Anime betrayal
Chapter thirty: Heat
Chapter thirty one: The silken girl
Characters pt.2
Chapter thirty two: Ravaged Desire
Chapter thirty four: 24 and Pregnant??!!
Chapter thirty five: No unicorns in Motherland
Chapter thirty six: Each Time
Chapter thirty-seven: Life happens
Chapter thirty eight: Nothing that a pizza can't repair
Chapter thirty nine: Surprise!
Chapter fourty: When life gives you lemons... ugh I don't even like lemons
Chapter fourty one: When the time comes pt.1
Chapter fourty two: Labor pains
Chapter fourty three: Pelvis who? Sorry you got the wrong address
Chapter fourty four: Sleepless nights
Chapter fourty five: It's gonna hit you hard: WE'RE JUST KIDS
Chapter fourty six: The few things I find comfort in
Chapter fourty seven: My personal hell
Chapter fourty eight: My mom, my biggest enemy
Chapter fourty nine: We need to talk
Chapter fifty: Let's end it here
Chapter fifty one: I decided not to blame myself
Chapter fifty- two: The stranger I had let in
Chapter fifty- three: Can we fall in love again?
Chapter fifty-three: That one time I fell in love with my best friend
Chapter fifty four: Beginners guide to romantic relationships
Chapter fifty-five : I will tell you about it... someday
Chapter fifty-six: The cruellest things I have suffered by my family's hands
Chapter fifty-seven: Let us be good again
Chapter fifty eight: Amateurs guide to sex
Chapter fifty nine: My friend who had stolen my heart
Chapter sixty: Amateurs guide to sex pt2
Chapter sixty-one: Parenting style or abuse in disguise?
Chapter sixty-two: Hair wash day and other chronicles
Chapter sixty-three: Happiness, some instructions
Chapter sixty-four: The weights we make and choose to carry
Chapter sixty- five: Life hack 34567, two broken people, a suicide mission
Chapter sixty-six: Black church experience
Chapter sixty-seven: Cooling off period, #friends don't kiss
Chapter sixty-eight: Don't say you love me
Chapter 69: Blood stained hands and salty tearsdrops

Chapter thirty three: Les I'm Miserable

142 13 0
By delta_215

Isa's pov

I woke up in a bedroom whose scent I didn't recognize. I tried to sit up, and noticed a butt naked Aaron holding me close to him.

Butt naked, butt naked... That's when I realized it

I had sex, I had sex. My mind slowly realized, I didn't dare to look under the sheets to confirm that, because of the pain I was still feeling in my lower region, and of course the blood.

My first reaction was to escape the crime scene, so I put my bra and panties on, not being able to stand my own morning breath I used my toothbrush to wash my mouth, I then put on my glasses, my jeans, jumper and sneakers, and got out of his flat.

Once I was in my car I started to hyperventilate, what's wrong with me? Was I drunk? Aaron was drunk... Maybe it was a mistake... Maybe? Of course it was. Oh, goodness what do I do?? I didn't stop, him, why did I not stop him?? I thought trying to catch my breath.

When I arrived home, waiting for me there was a very concerned Rajiv, with Adaline, who was already up at five o'clock. I showered, I felt dirty, I felt...I had just messed up, no matter how much hard I had tried to push those thoughts away it didn't work out.

While scrubbing my skin, once, twice and three times I started to cry, I must've been overwhelmed with the whole situation, I let the water wash away my salty tears wishing for it to take that uncomfortable feeling I had, away as well.

When I was done I got dressed and laid on the bed next to Rajiv, I crouched myself despite the warmth of the room, I felt cold; so Rajiv covered me with his blanket.

Feeling finally comfortable I confessed the thing that was weighting me down "I had sex... With Aaron" I whispered, Rajiv didn't rush me to know the details. It was as he could feel me, everything I felt and thought; instead he passed Adaline to me knowing her steady heartbeat would stabilize mine.

He hugged his body to us, letting Addy play with his hand. Soon I fell asleep.

Aaron's pov

I had never felt so deeply connected with someone while having sex, so I could say it was my first time too, my first time feeling something.

She smelled like talcum powder, and old books. I woke up at about seven past seven, by that time she was gone. I didn't know what was wrong, I thought she had enjoyed spending the night with me, I tried to keep it cool. Should I call her? Should I not? Should I keep my distance from her? Should I confess the whole truth?
Those thoughts popped in my mind.
I didn't have time to speculate so I focused on working.

About Four weeks later

Rajiv's pov

Isa had been acting weirder than usual: she wasn't eating as much as she usually did, she would spend three hours at the gym instead of two. She kept dozing off every where we went.

We were going to the mall, we bought some clothes for Addy, somethings that we needed, as we passed the alley where all the women products were exposed I stopped. I looked at the date, without making Isa notice.

Isa had missed her period... There's no need to freak out, maybe she missed it. because of her stress, or chronic diseases, a thyroid disorder and excessive exercise and last pregnancy.

The day after I made her take a blood test, to exclude the possibilities of chronic diseases and thyroid disorder. "I'm fine really" she protested "Are you really? Look Isa, you seem a little... How can I say it? Out of yourself lately, we'll just do a quick check up" I insisted trying to be as discreet as possible.

She visited the doctor, I was there just to make sure she cooperated, sometimes Isa behaved like a baby. Anyway the doctor then asked about Isa's symptoms, that's when she started to glare at me "She's been under a lot of stress, she feels tired most of the time, could it be because of excessive exercise? Oh and she missed her period..." I interrupted them. Isa's eyes widened hearing the last sentence, I knew she hadn't noticed in that very moment.

The doctor scolded me with her look, but appreciated my support towards Isa, "I say to wait and see the test result comes out".

After that we exited the doctor's office, "What the heck, do you monitor my period?" Isa asked surprised, "Yes, so I can buy you pads ad chocolate bars before you need them, that's not the point though" "It's for me I feel fine" "Yeah, that's what everyone says until they don't feel okay no more" I was getting mad at her for not taking care of herself.

As we were walking, Aaron stopped us I believe he wanted to talk to Isa, but she wasn't in the mood. "Wait, can we talk?" "We are already, now if you don't mind I have stuff to do". I didn't know what had happened between the two of them, but I was sure it was taking a toll on Isa.

Aaron looked at me for help, unfortunately I too, didn't know what was going on, "sorry man".

When the tests results were out, we went together to pick them up, "Did you open it, yet?" I inquired, hoping it would be some side effects of her being anemic "No, I was waiting for you" breathed Isa. She looked pale, she then counted to three and opened it, the test underlined a strong concentration of pregnancy hormones...

"You're pregnant" I exhaled covering my own mouth, I was way too shocked, that meant only two things: Aaron hadn't wore a condom the night they had sex or the condom broke.

Isa kept staring at that piece of paper till she passed out, I was lucky enough to grab her before she hit the ground.

Isa's pov

Everything went from blurry to dark in seconds. 'Fuck me' my inner voice said, 'that did not end up well the first time' another one interjected...

I woke up to the familiar beep beep of the heart monitor, and familiar voices.

"What happened? Can I see her? How is she?" Aaron's voice sounded worried, "I don't think that's a good idea... Anyway she's resting now" even Rajiv who never realized freaked out about anything seemed agitated.

I felt like crying, I wanted to cry so bad, because for the first time in years I was scared, and this time it wasn't the kind of happy scared, no it was far terrifying. Before I knew I had started to cry, as soon as Rajiv came in I wiped my tears.

Rajiv smiled, "Do I look that bad?" I asked expecting a joke from him, Rajiv didn't answer me which meant the situation was pretty serious.

"You can cry..." he said that knowing I only cried at home, in my safe place, everything felt so useless, my attempt to stay a virgin, my attempt not to have biological children except I was married with their father and happy, having avoided being a teen parent, just for this curve ball to hit me this hard.

And yet I could not explain how someone so outspoken like me, could have just freezed in a situation like the one that had gotten me pregnant in the first place. I felt intimidated and inexpert, and unprepared...

What had left me boiling in anger was the fact that Aaron knew I wasn't on the pill, knowing that not all sexual intercourses do end up in pregnancies I was left hanging in some low percentage of possibility to actually get pregnant, and that, that was where I fell...

"Hi, I am doctor Reed, I am in charge of-" "Dr. Reed, I know you... You don't need to introduce yourself to me" I found everything embarrassing to the point I wanted to hide myself under the white sheets, "Right, sorry. Anyway you are anaemic, that is probably what caused you to pass out, I prescribed you some vitamins for it, and of course you should visit your OBGYN, you can be discharged, I would recommend to get plenty of sleep, if the fetus lacks the proper rest it may lead to a miscarriage, that's all. You can be discharged, I will handle the rest" he smiled leaving.

As soon as he was out, I took my clothes got dressed and attempted to flee the scene, "Where are you going? You should at least finish your IV" Rajiv was genuinely concerned about my health but I just wanted to be left alone.

Not being able to work for the next day, I went to fetch Adaline earlier, "Amore" (Love) I grinned as she ran to me, she was now able to walk, run, and say mamma, and make other sentences but she was working on it...

"Sei contenta che ti sia venuta a prendere prima?" (Are you happy I came to pick you up earlier?) "Di" (Si – Yes) she giggled as I tickled her neck, since I felt too lethargic we laid in her bedroom, watching the world map I had painted in her room wall, "This is where mommy was born" I said pointing the Italian's peninsula "Italia, ripeti con me" (Italy, say it with me) "Italia" she said flawlessly, "They have the most delicious food" "Yummy in belly" Adaline commented patting her belly, I laughed as if I was not having a shitty day.








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