I feel dizzy waking up, but after a few minutes of staring at grey pebbles on the ground, I slowly regain all five senses.
I sit up immediately knowing two things: One, all of my stuff is missing.
Worriedly, I pat down my clothes, letting out a relieved sigh when I assure myself that they didn't find the letter in the pocket of my jacket. The note withholding the note from Darrell is still safe, which means that the Others aren't aware of it yet.
Secondly, the next thing I notice is that I am in a tiny wooden hut, with Kade either asleep or unconscious on the dirt floor in the corner. I am still outside in the woods somewhere, but now it is dark outside. Not being able to move my hands or feet, I scoot over on my butt towards Kade, wincing when I twist my throbbing head.
"Kade." I whisper, my voice hoarse.
Without having a supply of fresh water, my voice feels like sandpaper. But with no answer from Kade, I nudge him on the ground.
"Hmm?" He grumbles, eyes still closed.
"Kade, wake up."
Eyebrows furrowed, Kade opens two bright green orbs and blinks at me. His orangey hair is disheveled and one of his military jacket sleeves is ripped up to his forearm. He looks at me confused at first, but perhaps seeing the worry in my expression, he tries to sit up, doubling over in the process. Groaning, he manages to flop himself over from his resting position into a sitting one, his hands and legs also bound by rope. He must be a little sore from his struggle against the Other soldiers trying to tie him down earlier, and is feeling the effects of their strength.
"Where are we?"
"Do you remember what happened?"
I hope this incident didn't make his previous concussion worse - he is still recovering from a blow to the head.
"Oh." He states, his posture now upright and aware.
Seeing his reaction, it is clear that he recalls what situation we are currently in. I search the room desperately for something that could maybe help us get out of here, but the place is completely barren of everything except dirt, gravel, and walls.
"We need to get out of here," I huff.
Andres is probably scared to death, and I need to find him before anyone hurts him.
"Have any ideas?"
We both sit and think to ourselves for a couple minutes before someone opens the makeshift-twig door that briefly reveals a campfire and surrounding tents beyond the threshold. Standing in the doorway, an ugly and tall brown haired man sneers down at Kade and I.
"Nation members, I see."
"What's it to you? We aren't spies, if that's what you're thinking. Just let us go." Kade stays calm, but there is a slight shakiness to his voice.
Spies. The word holds weight, and I feel guilt settle in my gut. Kade doesn't know what I carry, and how dangerous it will be if we are caught blatantly lying.
"If you think I'm buying that then you must be stupid." The man scoffs bitterly. "You're here for a reason, and if you think we are going to release you without getting answers first, you are most definitely wrong."
So they are already on to us.
Wonderful.
I share a concerned look with Kade, not ready for what I think is coming next.
"Now, who wants to go first?"
Interrogation.
The air is silent except for the indistinguishable conversations coming from the outside.
"Where are we?" I ask.
"None of your business."
"And why not?" Kade comes to my defense.
"Because," he grins, his long nose casting a shadow over his thin and miserable face. "You two won't be getting out of here anytime soon."
A bead of sweat trails down my neck, but I try to hide thee nervousness on my face. The man examines me for a second and says, "How old are you?"
It's a strange question, and makes me feel queasy inside. Can he see the fear on my face? I never thought of myself as conceited, but from the encounter I had on the day I first met Camillo and Kade, I have been very cautious about the way I look.
These men do not know that I am an outcast, a volatile bottle of energy trapped inside a small body. They don't stay away like everyone in Woodson does, even if I am considered pretty.
When a man sees fear on a girl's face, they take advantage.
"None of your business." I mock, throwing the words back at him.
It's a risk, but one I'm willing to take if it wards him off. It seems that I'm doing a lot of that lately.
But instead of acting surprised, the Other soldier just leans down towards my face, and whispers in my ear. I snap my teeth at him before he can get too close.
Not again not again not again -
"Misbehaving now, are we?" He tsks."Well, congratulations! You just won yourself a spot for being questioned first. We'll have lots of fun, won't we?"
What a dick.
Wanting to scream or kick him but unable to from the rope, I clench my fists tightly so that they're straining against their ties. I glare at the man as he yanks me to stand up by my shoulder. He then cuts off the bindings on my feet.
"Kick me and you'll pay, I promise you. Now move."
His grip on my arm is iron tight, and he walks directly behind me while I go outside. Kade looks pained, but he can't save me now.
I will be questioned first, and I must decide how much I want to tell them.
Instinctively, I take in all that I can about my surroundings for the brief path I take to what I assume is the interrogation tent. I want to run, but there's too many people walking around. The prying eyes burn my skin, and some Other soldiers in signature navy uniforms even whistle as I go past them.
Disgusting.
Ignoring the cat calls, I focus on the foliage and the landscape. It seems to me that we are located at one of the Other's army bases, which means there are soldiers swarming the place. Guards are posted at the corners of the camp, holding their rifles high in a semi circle a few feet away. This will make it even more difficult to escape. The most secluded area here seems to be an unprotected opening between two tents that lead off into the never ending woods.
My sense of direction has always been pretty on-target from navigating the forests Woodson, and I pray that it is enough to help me here.
"What's your name, by the way? My real name is Jimir, but people call me Slim." Slim whispers into my ear again, his hot breath on the back of my neck.
I feel gross - like when that Nation soldier in the forest put his hands on my waist -
I push the thoughts away.
You are Adeline. You have inherent individuality. You have the right to own your voice and actions. No one else can take that away.
"Oh really?" I murmur in feigned interest. "Well, you know, a name really says a lot about a person."
Nice comeback, I tell myself.
Taking a second to realize what I am suggesting, Slim turns to me unbelievably, as if he couldn't understand the fact that I just offended his masculinity. My face is smug, and his face turns red as we reach the interrogation tent.
Angrily, Slim shoves me through the tent door.
Smack.
And slaps me on the face, hard.
I wince and fall to the floor, turning my stinging cheek to the side.
Ouch. That hurt.
"Easy, Slim."
I watch as the other man in the room - a general, from the looks of his shiny lapel badges - treads over to Slim from the opposite side of the tent.
"No. Women like her need to know their place, and talking back is not allowed. She will be treated just like anybody else," Slim whines, crossing his arms over his chest.
With these words, Slim gives off an obvious impression of his views that explains his discourteous behavior - a patriarchal man who has a complex with his ego, and likes to take it out on the female sex. I find it ironic that whether you are in Nation or Other territory, discrimination against my kind still exists in all forms. It explains why the world and I won't ever get along, since I pride myself on being a woman with a conviction of her own that is just as... discourteous if I can help it.
"Well then, begin the interrogation and stop wasting my time."
"Yes, Sir." Slim rolls his eyes, walking over to me still sitting on the floor.
I don't bother standing up to face him - I'm too stunned from the slap and too aggravated to care about propriety now. If he wants to look me in the eye, he can come down to my level this time.
"First off, what are you doing so far away from home?" Slim inquires, clearly annoyed with me.
I shrug instead of replying to piss him off. My cheek is still stinging, and he's getting on my nerves, too.
He squats down next to me just enough to be face to face, his face scrunched up in a cruel manner. "Are you going to answer me?"
Nope.
How long can I play this game with him?
I admit it's a little amusing, taunting him.
"Where do you come from?"
Again, I don't answer.
I smirk, but in a flash I'm not smiling anymore - I am sprawled out on the ground again, my mouth curled into an expression of pain. In response to my silence, Slim had stood up and kicked me in the stomach.
What kind of man harms a woman?
I bite my tongue to keep myself from crying out. He doesn't deserve that satisfaction.
Stepping beside Slim, the general enters the conversation. "Enough of this. I know you are hiding something, girl. What is it? Why are you here?"
"No...reason." I grit out, coughing.
I try to lie and pretend that I am innocent because I'm not liking where this interrogation is going. If I tell them that I am a spy, will they hurt Camillo, Andres, and Kade anyways? It's better not to say anything, I decide. I am betting on my ability to hide the secret note I keep in my pocket like an actress putting on a show, hoping the audience believes her story.
But throughout all of history, women haven't been the protagonists of their story. They are the enemy.
Can I be the hero of mine?
Will my facade be enough?
"Liar!" Seethes Slim.
The general sighs, "Go ahead then, Slim."
Slim hauls me off the floor, and tries to tie me to a chair. "Stay still."
I disregard his comment, and try to kick my way past his hold.
"If you tell us everything, you might leave here with your life, girl. If not, I'm afraid you'll have to face the consequences." The general recites this simply, as if he's done this sort of thing before.
I know that war is war and war is cruel, but I can't imagine that Nation would do anything like this. These people are just plain terrible.
Would I risk my life for my country?
I could spill everything right now, not caring about the war. This is Nation's fight - not mine. I could be selfish, and take Andres home safely with me. Never to be seen again. But then I think about people who are like Camillo and Kade - individuals whose lives matter just as mine do. As tempting as it is, I know deep down that not under any circumstances can I reveal the note Darell had given me. And even if I did tattletale, who's to say that these people won't kill me anyways?
The way Darell presented the piece of paper to me - so carefully yet causally so that I wouldn't refuse his offer - gives the underlying impression that delivering it most definitely overrides my personal feelings. It is for something greater - a key piece to ending this war that has been going on for years. I feel the importance of it resting in my heart and soul.
And to give that up?
There's no shot in hell that I would.
My honor wouldn't let me.
"Do what you must," I say, pronouncing each word slowly and carefully. I settle down in my chair with my dignity hopefully still intact. I will no longer be living constantly afraid. "But whatever you do, do not talk to me as if I am a fool. I know what war entails."
The statement earns me a pathetic laugh from the ignorant Slim, who doesn't see how dangerous I can be to those who offend my will to protect myself and the people that I love.
So instead of crying or begging I just sit there, in the middle of the room, head held high and waiting for what's to come. I am too proud to be disgraced, too full with knowledge from the beginning to know that I wouldn't have ever made it this far with that letter in my pocket without getting harmed, anyways.
I signed up for this.
And I will bear the burden of my mistakes like I always have.
"Fine. Have it your way." The general in charge frowns and moves to leave the room.
Apparently, Slim is the violent one, not the general. So now that we are alone, Slim takes advantage of his power over me.
"You'll regret the things you say, girl," he whispers as his dry and cracked lips rub against my top ear. He has no concept of personal space, it seems. "It's time someone taught you a lesson on how to behave."
"I don't think I'm the one who doesn't know how to behave."
I laugh as his fist collides with my jaw, even though I hear my neck snap violently to the side as a result of not being able to block the blow with my hands. I knew I shouldn't have said that, but I couldn't help it. I was going to get beat either way.
The littered hits and punches that follow to my torso and arms and legs are too much to count, so I stop counting. I'm so damaged that Slim is able to cut off my chains and leave me limp in the floor, confident that I couldn't run away even if I tried.
But there are still no tears in my eyes.
I did my job - I kept my secret. Even if I have to get cat called and punched at again, I'll do the same tomorrow. And the day after that. My resolve is unyielding, and it's probably half hour before my body starts to give in.
Gradually but surely, the stars behind my eyelids dim. I have no movement in my limbs, my head is throbbing. I feel extremely faint, and I am glad when my vision starts to fade.
The darkness sinks in just as a familiar face walks into the tent with the general, tied up like how I was just an hour ago.
I'm knocked out before I can reply to someone crying out my name, the sound lost to my ears and a reality that has faded away.