Fireheart padded through the forest, annoyance painfully prevalent in his chest. He was feeling incredibly irritated, and was heading to the Riverclan border, where he knew a certain silver queen would be waiting.
Pushing through the brambles, he could make out immediately, Silverstream's pelt.
Hissing, he skidded down the slope.
"Looking for someone?" He sneered, allowing his irritation a target just this once.
"I have no idea what you're talking about, I'm simply-" Fireheart cut her off "Graystripe isn't coming" he interjected.
The queen froze up, a dumb look plastered to her face. "W-what are you talking about" she stammered.
"Silverstream, don't play fox. I know you've been seeing each other. No, don't respond" he cut her off before she could stack a retort, "against my better judgement - and the warrior code - I've covered for you two, but this ends today. You two need to stop this. Cats are starting to notice," Fireheart mewed, quelling his anger before it took over, and allowing himself to have a two way talk.
"Listen Warrior. Fireheart was it? I don't have to explain myself to you!" She hissed, her voice growing into a snarl.
Fireheart padded forward, "look Silverstream"- he said, still creeping toward the fuming she-cat-" I have no intention of giving you away to Crookedstar. All I ask is that you stop seeing him, because.. I can't bear to see the furball get in trouble. If you really loved him, you'd want the same. " He ended. The last part came as a whisper. He had no idea where that came from.
Silverstream stared at him for a second, as if analyzing him, before something changed. Now they shone with a new light, but Fireheart wasn't sure what it was. It looked like... pity? Did she pity him? How in StarClan dare she?! But before he could verbally jab at her, she cut in.
"Look Fireheart. Even if I wanted to break it off, I can't. You see, I'm expecting his kits."
At those words, colour drained from the world and Fireheart's heart fell screaming and flailing into the pit of his chest. That was the only explanation for the pulse that just passed through his pelt.
"W-what?" He choked, taking a shaky step back, but not ready to plant his left forepaw back onto the ground.
"I'm sorry Fireheart. There's nothing I can do about it" she mewed.
Fireheart felt dizzy. He lost track of the queen. All he could see was the ground. Would the world please stop spinning for a moment? He turned around to hide his face. He knew that there was no possibility of disguising pain he felt. Like a delicate leaf catching the morning dew, his heart was threatening to spill over.
He darted in a direction, not once looking back, but slowed once he was confident that he was out of the she-cat's earshot. He shook his head,
"Why do I even care!?" He screamed, digging his claws into the soft earth, and and resentment toward Graystripe swelling like nothing he'd ever felt. He pinched his eyes shut to relieve the tension in his face.
"Graystripe you idiot!" He muttered angrily to himself, teeth clenched.
Just then, realization hit Fireheart like a monster, his grieving running to a halt. He was really ticked off with that furball. Turning abruptly, he stomped back into Thunderclan territory to confront Graystripe.
The camp was buzzing with life, kits playing with moss, Yellowfang treating Runningwind's paw, Tigerclaw sorting the midday patrol.
"Graystripe!" He snarled over the clearing. A head popped out from behind the nursery, a bramble twig in his mouth. A couple cats turn their heads their heads to Graystripe, their gazes portraying confusion, some with looks of pity, and then back at Fireheart. "Now what has he done?" Runningwind whispered to Fireheart, but he payed no attention, only grabbed graystripe's ear with his thorn-like claws once gray warrior reached him, and dragged him out of camp, Graystripe stumbling and struggling behind.
Fireheart dragged him down to the training hollow and let go of his ear.
"Oww. What is wrong with you?" He whined.
"What's wrong with me!?" He retorted, his face contorted in anger.
"Graystripe I cant believe you!" He continued. "You... you- you... With Silverstream!"
Graystripe tilted his head. "So now you're so angry about that? You're a bit late to the hunt there" He retorted.
Fireheart stepped forward furiously, rounding on the warrior.
"Silverstream's expecting kits." He blurted out. Graystripes stilled, the white of his eyes showing.
Fireheart averted his eyes for a moment out of anger, noticing water pattering to the ground, battering his friend's fur. When did it start raining?
"I-I-" Graystripe stumbled over his words, but fireheart interrupted him, his voice raised in panic.
"Do you understand how the clan will feel? Do you even care how I f-" Fireheart choked on his words, realizing exactly what he was feeling. Resentment, and pain. But the strongest, a feeling so strong that he could almost taste it. Betrayal. Tears began sneaking their down his face despite his best own efforts almost, mostly disguised by the rain. Graystripe stared on, his gaze fixed on Fireheart. The flame-colored tom was staring at the ground, vision blurred, not sure if it was the rain or his own tears, his claws sheathing and unsheathing out into the ground, clenching his teeth to suppress his hurt as much as he could. Suddenly though, he felt the warmth of a pelt pressed against his own. He looked up, hoping to see Graystripe pressed against him, reassuring him that everything was okay, but was disappointed at seeing the white pelt of the senior warrior Whitestorm. At that point though, Fireheart didn't care. Fireheart just let the Whitstorm guide him back to camp, Graystripe not far behind, and the rain still bucketing down, drowning out any sounds made by the warriors. Graystripe didn't even have words to offer. It hurt so much.
The trek back to camp allowed Fireheart to clear his thoughts and compose himself slightly. Though the downpour didn't stop, neither the sky nor his own, he could speak without blubbering.
When they pushed through the gorse entrance, Fireheart headed straight for the corner of the clearing. He refused to sleep in the same den as Graystripe that night. He'd rather sleep outside in the rain. He crouched down, rain and mud baking his belly fur and he winced, immediately beginning to shiver and squirm uncomfortably. Just as he was reconsidering his decision, he felt a tail brush against his ear. He looked up to see Goldenflower. She was ushering him toward the nursery, a sympathetic look in her eyes. He wouldn't think twice about the offer.
As he pushed through the entrance of the nursery, he was greeted with the sweet milky scent that was forever wafting through this den.
"Fireheart. What were you doing out there laying in the rain? You know you'll catch a cold."
Goldenflower scolded, the other three queens looking on. Frostfur was staring sharply at Fireheart until her face softened. Well I suppose the rain doesn't hide my distress-scent as well as I'd hoped. He thought to himself
"What's wrong. Did something happen?" She pressed.
Fireheart didn't want to talk about Graystripe right now, so he dodged the question, hoping they just accept it.
"would it... be alright if I slept here tonight? Otherwise I can just go back outside. I just... can't be in the warrior's den right now" Fireheart whimpered, curling his tail self-consciously, looking left and right.
"Well, it's not everyday a tom spends the night in the nursery. Not a grown one anyway, young as you may be." Brindleface remarked.
"I have no problem with it" Goldenflower mewed, shifting over to make space.
"Thanks" Fireheart murmured, not in the mood for causal, meaningful conversation. He lay down and went to sleep. Too bad no kits had arrived yet. He thought to himself. They'd be a welcome distraction from all this.
He let out an audible sigh, staring out into the clearing, watching the rain pattern out against the forest floor. Just as the stormy droplets began to lull him, Graystripe came padding across the clearing looking around in all directions, to which Fireheart turned his head away, screwing his eyes tightly shut and attempted to fall asleep faster, but of course, nothing ever goes according to plan. Curses.
"Fireheart. Are you okay?" Fireheart heard his voice at the entrance. Fireheart sighed.
He shifted his head back toward the entrance, and opened his eyes, not bothering to lift his head, ears folded back. "I'm fine. What do you want?" Fireheart muttered resignedly, tired.
"What happened back there. Can we talk about it?" Graystripe pleaded. Fireheart stared daggers at Graystripe, fury slipping through the cracks.
"There's nothing to talk about. I don't see any problems here. I'm okay. You're certainly okay, we're okay, everything's all just super duper okay, right? Right?" Fireheart retorted, his half-hearted mumble turning into venomous hissing and spitting. He then turned his head with a huff to face the nursery wall, tears threatening to return.
He heard a sigh, and Graystripe's paw steps padding closer. Suddenly he felt a warm tongue caress the top of his head once, twice, thrice. Fireheart still refuse to react, but felt the fur on his shoulders involuntarily relax and fall flat. He never even realized his hackles were raised. But he was still hurt, and a couple of licks weren't going to fix that. Then he heard Graystripe padding away, back into the rain. He was gone again.
"Well, I see the issue." Brindleface commented after a moment, as though waiting for Graystripe to be out of earshot. Fireheart frowned harder at that it was that obvious, trying to pretend he didn't hear that.
"Fireheart, coming from a queen who's spent over four moons dealing with a mouse-brained tom, the best thing to do is talk it out." Brindleface purred.
Fireheart turned to her.
"Brindleface. What do you think is going on between us?" He asked, worried about how right she might be.
"Well it seems to me that Graystripe is padding after you, and not in a subtle way, but then again, subtlety has never been his strong suit. Now, he's done something characteristically stupid, as all toms do." Brindleface exclaimed, earning herself a group chuckle.
"If he is, in fact, padding after me then he isn't doing a very good job" he snorted. He even has another mate. What she didn't know about was the extra fishy variable in the equation.
Then her voice became more serious.
"Even if it isn't your fault, ignoring the issue won't make it go away. Sometimes you have to step up to the plate, even when you deserve better." She urged, staring at him with piercing eyes.
Fireheart sighed again, dropping his head back to the ground. "The truth is I have no idea. We've always been close. Not like mates close, but closer than friends, and then he... does something stupid, and when I try to confront him, he acts like there was never anything. He's been giving me the cold shoulder for almost a moon now, and now I'm just supposed to come crawling back whenever he needs something? Certainly not. And then he just ditches me when I need him most. I refuse to be his plaything." He lamented, laying his head down, resting on his chin.
"Am I being too harsh? Cause I don't know anymore. All I know is that if the places were swapped, I'd still be here with him, regardless of how many times he tells me to eat dirt, just so he knew how much he meant to me. It just hurts that he wouldn't do the same." Fireheart opened up. At this point, nothing was sacred. He may as well be an open book. He didn't have the energy to pick and choose every detail of what he said.
Frostfur and Goldenflower were just staring at him.
"I know it's stupid. You don't need to look at me like that." He mewed, suddenly quite self-conscious again, pulling his tail in.
But the she-cats' eyes were caring, not agitative. Then Frostfur shook her head, smiling.
"Fireheart. Of course he cares about you. Maybe you can't see it, or maybe he's just really bad at showing it? But, staring from the outside in, I'm sure every queen here would agree. Even Speckletail. That was a mately display of affection - and apology, of course - if I've ever seen one." She mewed
"Right"- Brindleface spoke up -"You know he's a mouse brain, and we all know toms hate to share their feelings, out of fear of looking vulnerable. Maybe it's his pride. Or maybe he's just oblivious. But it's clear to see that he cares now." She finished.
"I think you need to give the furball a chance to make it up to you. Forgive him for the apology he's too afraid to give." Speckletail–surprisingly– spoke up, ungrudgingly. She was the oldest, and the wisest queen of all of them.
Fireheart sighed.
"Maybe you're right. Maybe he didn't mean for it to turn out like this. Can I still stay here for the night though? I'm still... not really ready to face him. Plus, it's really warm in here."
He mewed with humorous pleading.
They chuckled in chorus.
"It is, isn't it?" Goldenflower purred.
So, with a mew, he lay his head down, sleep quickly taking over.
There was so much to this story that these queens didn't know, but they were right that Fireheart needed to forgive an undeserving Graystripe and hope that the furball would make himself worthy of that forgiveness.