Grace
I pushed aside the curtain to look out of the window of Harry's living room. Since it was already past 10am, the sun was in the sky, slightly warming up the air in the streets and making the glass between me and the city shine. I smiled lightly to myself and pushed the curtain completely out of the way to enlighten the room, a sense of peace that I hadn't felt in quite a while pervading me as I thought of the events of the day before. Even though the nagging feeling that it wouldn't have been over quite yet wouldn't leave the back of my mind, I had already started to feel as if everything, slowly, was falling back into the right place. More than falling back, just falling into a new, better order. I hadn't really known normal since I had started dating Harry, given that we had had someone run after us - after him - since the start, and I had a feeling that Harry himself hadn't for quite a while as well.
I slightly moved my head to the side as I heard the mattress creak in the other room, and the faint sound of steps on the wooden floor. I went back to looking out of the window when I realised he wasn't coming my way, and I put my hand over the handle to open it to allow the cold air inside.
"I wouldn't do it if I were you" a deep voice said from the other side of the room, "I know there's the sun outside, but it's cold."
I smiled slightly as he walked towards me, not turning around to look at him.
He pulled a lock of my dark hair back, uncovering my neck. "I have something for you" he murmured into my ear, as one of his arms sneaked around my waist. "I know you've given Gemma her keys to my house back. I also know we've been living together for quite a while, so it might not have the same meaning now, but you know, I just wanted to make it official."
I widened my eyes as his other hand came from behind me, a key between his index and middle finger.
"This is a copy of the key to my house. Your copy. I had it made a few days ago" he whispered, and I turned my head to look at him.
"Thank you" I said faintly, pressing a kiss to his jawline, and he smiled.
He twirled it between his fingers before offering it to me. "Here."
I took it and I turned around to hug him properly. "It has the same meaning" I whispered into his ear. "So thank you."
He reached out to pull the curtain over the window, hiding the inside of the room from the world. "Have any plans for today?"
I shrugged. "I should meet up with Gemma later today, you know, talk about the wedding and such."
"That sounds nice I suppose. Now that you're mentioning Gemma, I remembered I wanted to tell you I think I'm ready to read... you know. I don't know if I'm really ready, I might chicken out before, but I want to try, at least. I don't think I'll ever be completely ready for that, so it doesn't really matter if I do it today or in three months, does it?" He said, and I smiled at his rambling.
"Whenever you want to, Harry." I hugged him tighter just before letting go and walking to the kitchen to start getting our breakfast ready.
He followed me into the kitchen and opened one of his cupboards. "Will you be there with me?"
"Do you want me to?" I asked him, turning around and leaning against the cooker.
"I don't think I can do it alone" he replied honestly, stopping his actions as well and glancing at me.
I nodded slightly. "Then sure. Whenever you want to, I'm here."
He gave me a little smile. "Thank you so much. I... I just want you to know that I'm trying. I mean, I really am. I know it doesn't really look like it, but I am."
"I can see you're trying, Harry. You've done it so wonderfully so far, I'm really proud of you" I replied reaching out to take his hand, drawing small circles against its back with my finger.
He gave me a little nod and I went back to preparing our breakfast, using only one hand not to let go of his.
• • •
"I can't believe you actually did it!" Gemma whispered excitedly leaning back against the chair.
I smiled. "I hardly can believe it as well. But hopefully he will leave him alone from now on."
She raised an eyebrow, pursing her lips. "I was talking about the fact that you had sex actually, but yeah that's pretty nice as well."
I widened my eyes at her bluntness and glanced around the cafe to make sure that nobody was close enough to have possibly heard what she had said. "Can you just stop that?" I pleaded. "Every time you mention it it gets a little more awkward, given that you're his sister and all."
"Look at you, you're blushing" she said awing.
"We met to talk about Louis you know, not my sex life with your brother. Which is something, by the way, that I'd never willingly talk about" I sighed, and she nodded.
"Okay, you're right. Back to the point." She leant over the table a little bit. "Now tell me, what happened exactly?"
I shrugged. "It's hard to tell. He read it, and then started saying that he never meant to hurt Harry and things like that. Oh, and he also said that he needed to take it out on someone, and Harry was his first choice. That should be about it."
"Great, one less problem for us" she replied excitedly with a smile on her face.
"Are you sure about that? Because like, I don't want to be the one saying it, but it feels like I don't know, it might not end here. Like, from what you and Harry have told me, he's been harassing Harry for years. It's unlikely to think he'll just stop like that" I said, looking at the table before taking a sugar packet and starting to play with it nervously.
"It's over" she replied, "I know it's hard to believe, but it really is. Louis... I know you don't trust him, neither do I, honestly, but he's not half as bad as you think he is. He made some bad choices, that's for sure true, but he's not a bad person. He's never been. That's why Harry has always refused to go to the police about him. He just found himself in a situation he couldn't deal with, and he tried to find a way to do it, just like Harry did, by the way. Harry's way was... well, I guess you know now, don't you? You have to have seen it. His way was to try to... end his life, and just try to go on at best when it didn't... work out. Louis's way was to find the person that was responsible for the death of his sister, and make them pay for it. Can you blame him for that? If something happened to Harry, I think I'd probably lose my mind as well. He just picked the wrong person."
"But something has already happened to Harry. He's tried to... do it, twice. And all because of Louis. Harry did what he did because it was his way of coping with the fake idea Louis basically drilled into his mind" I said, "Do you know how long it will take for him to be okay again - if he ever will, of course. And as much as I believe in him, I can't stop feeling like he will never not consider himself responsible for what happened that night, and since I know he will only be okay when he'll stop thinking that, I am worried. And all this mess is because of Louis. If it wasn't for him, who knows, Harry maybe would've never tried to do what he did."
She sighed. "There's no reason to keep talking about what ifs. Now, the thing is, Louis still cares about Harry, somewhere deep inside. I could see he was crushed when he found out Harry did what he did, and that's why I'm saying we have nothing to worry about now. Louis won't come for Harry again, now that he knows the accident wasn't his fault." She stared down at the table with a pained look on her face. "I should've done it sooner. If I had, maybe the situation wouldn't have got nearly as bad. What kind of sister am I?"
"Hey" I said, making her look up. "You just said there's no reason to dwell on what ifs now. So, how about the wedding?" I asked her, changing topic to distract her.
She beamed at the simple mention of it. "I can't wait! I can't believe that I'll get married in three months! This is insane. By the way, can you pull off pale pink nicely? Because I wanted the dresses of the bridesmaids to be pink. A nice rose colour. So, do you look absolutely amazing in it or should I change colour? I supposed you'd look good since that your hair is brown, but I don't really know."
"I think I can pull off pink pretty well" I said laughing, making her squeal excitedly.
"Okay, it's settled then! You should come help me with the dress now that you're a bit freer. I think all the other bridesmaids are lying to me because they want me to be happy, I need some real opinions."
"I will! Just tell me when" I replied, looking at my phone, that was in the middle of the table, as the screen lit up with a message from Harry.
"Oh look, my brother is texting you. How adorable is he? What does it say?" She asked curiously.
"He's asking me when I get home" I replied after reading it, "He told me he wanted to try to read the report this morning, so that's probably it."
"That, or maybe he just wants to have sex" Gemma replied, making me widen my eyes again. "Which means, both of them are like, immediate urgency. Get your ass back home. Use the beautiful new key he had made just for you and all."
"I swear, sometimes you are so embarrassing" I said, gathering my things before standing up anyway, and she did the same.
"I know, I do it on purpose." She checked her phone as well. "Oh look, my fiancée wants me home as well. He probably wants to either have sex or eat. If it's the second, I'm gonna be disappointed."
"Are you aware of the fact that you're standing in the middle of a public place?" I told her, and she gave me a weird glance.
"Of course. But that doesn't mean I'll enjoy stopping to get pizza more. Because I will. If Michal texts, it's because he wants food most of the time. I think I'm about to marry a couch potato, I'm concerned."
I laughed. "Alright, bye."
"Bye to you too! Hopefully you'll get Harry to read that report tonight!" She said before making her way out of the door.