The thing about my school is that if there is an assembly, it is usually for explaining dress code—not that anyone really follows it anyways—and the rules for the year. This usually happens every semester. Also, keep in mind that there are two semesters in a year. So someone please explain to me why there is an assembly in the middle of the first semester, even though we have already had one the first week of school?
Normally we have our assemblies in the auditorium, separated by boys and girls. For some odd reason, it's in the gym with everyone piling in together. I walked into the gym with my hopes seriously low. For all I know, someone could have died, or worse.
Everyone is separated by common interests and so-called friendship. Anna and Ashley sit together with Bryson and Cole on the left side of the gym, in the middle. Their little wannabes sit farther down the bleachers, closer to the front so they can alternate between looking up at the ones they admire and still being the center of attention from everyone else.
Violet sits in the direct middle of the bleachers with her other weirdos. I think they listen to music, cut hair, design clothes, and join weird fandoms and just make fun of all the other people that don't fit into these categories. Beneath them are the serious nerds. Half of them are in my Journalism class but no one has to really know that. They are actually pretty cool from what I've seen. At least they'll be going to college unlike some people at this school.
To the far right are Christina and her little clique. She doesn't have friends, she has followers. They are all a bunch of posers who strut around the school as if they own everything. They aren't on The Clique Series' level, or even on the Plastic's level from Mean Girls, they are just their own little creation. Basically, if they throw a party, everyone is going to try and attend. If they wear something cute, people are going to get jealous.
The funniest thing is that Jamie is Christina's right hand man for the job. She used to be a good friend of mine back in the seventh grade when she was in Journalism with me. But she grew mega boobs in the eighth grade and Christina swept her right out of my arms and into her little cult. It's funny how that happens.
In between the "nerds" and Violet seats Omunique and her friends. They are all dressed in some kind of cute urban wear, and are all people of color. She is clearly popular. Anyways, on the bleachers closer to the front of Christina sits the basic students, the ones that have basic lives and no social status. They make friends, toss old ones and live typical lives. I can easily say that I am a part of this group, if I am even in a group to begin with.
Now that I just analyzed who assembles where, I have yet to find somewhere to sit. I spotted Winston walking in and he frowned as he assessed his surroundings. Anna's eyes grew particularly bright when she spotted him, her hand immediately waving him over. He turned a bright red and then headed in her direction. I laughed quietly to myself. Anna's eyes landed on mine and she waved me over as well. Dang it, now I'll be associated as one of "them." There's nothing wrong with them, but I don't think I really fit in with them. I took a seat next to Ashley and watched as Anna pulled Winston to her side.
"What is this assembly about?" Ashley asked, twirling her red hair in her hands.
"Probably about all of the people who don't follow the dress code." Cole smiled.
Bryson laughed and then started fake coughing. "Ashley and Anna." Cole and Bryson high-fived. I laughed and Ashley slapped him on the arm.
A tapping noise on a microphone registered in my ears and I looked down to see Mrs. Hawkins behind a podium on the gym floor. No one wants to hear her speak, or at least I don't. Winston stole a glance at me. I waved. Help me, he mouthed. I snickered behind my hand.
"How's the painting going, Ashley?" I asked, trying my very hardest to ignore Winston's pleas.
"Great. I just spent one thousand dollars of my shopping money on painting equipment. I thought it would make me feel... sad. But, it made me feel good, especially when I actually started painting." She smiled, her eyes genuinely happy.
"That's great." I patted her arm.
"Oh! I'm having one of my famous Halloween parties again this year. You two must come, okay?" Anna handed Winston and I black envelops with spider webs along them.
Wear the best costume you can muster and show up, so you won't be a buster. BYOB. Prepare to be scared.
Love and Kisses,
Anna Bear ♥
I bit my lip to hold back laughter. At least the girl can rhyme. "I'll try and attend."
Anna clapped. "Yeah! It's going to be fun, I promise!"
Yes, so fun and the whole school will catch Chlamydia all over again. Mrs. Hawkins still struggled to get the microphone working. Honestly, I hope she takes all day so I can miss all of my classes.
"Are you and Winton together?" Ashley asked. I lifted my eyes from Mrs. Hawkins.
"What? No we are not together. Plus, Anna likes him."
Ashley started laughing. "Anna likes everybody. I've known her since Kindergarten. If a new guy came through the doors right now and told her she was beautiful, she'd go to him in a second. The girl is like a little puppy. Whoever feeds her what she wants; she will adore that person for the time being. If Winston told her he didn't like her, she'd offer to be friends. That's the kind of person she is. She never gets butt hurt over anything. You and Winston... I don't know. It's just like... you two have this special connection that no one really even gets by just looking at you. It goes deep."
I gulped at her words. First of all, she's trying to give me advice. How weird is that? Second, she's talking about Winston? How much weirder is that?
"I don't like him like that. Winston and I are just friends..." My eyes trailed to his and he is laughing about something with Anna. Winston is obviously handsome. He is the smartest guy I know, and one of the best guys at school. The dude is a true gentleman, but he will never be my gentleman. He looked over at me and mimed barfing. I laughed. "We are just friends." I repeated a second time for extra measure.
"Friends make great partners," Ashley whispered.
"Students of Grand Ridge," Mrs. Hawkins yelled through the now working microphone. Never in my life have I been happier to hear her voice. "Today we are gathered to talk about a few certain matters at our school." Well obviously. I rolled my eyes. "We have gone over dress code, and still we have several men sagging, girls half naked. If you want to dress like that, stay home."
"Don't have to tell me twice," Anna shouted out. A lot of people erupted with laughter. Ashley high-fived her.
Mrs. Hawkins shook her head. "Also, there are too many students in detention." Her eyes landed on mine. I sunk in my seat. How did she find me amongst the influx of students? Winston chuckled into his hand. "You need to be in class, stop making childish and petty mistakes and just behave well in school. Profanity is not prohibited, hitting others is not allowed, and disrespecting authority is just not allowed." She glared at me. I swallowed, hard.
"Jeez, someone hasn't had sex in a while," Bryson whispered under his breath. Everyone in my group started giggling.
"On to the matter I really want to discuss... this Chlamydia outbreak. Seriously, students unacceptable!" She pounded her fist on the podium.
Violet stood up. "Not trying to be disrespectful, ma'am, but are you even allowed to discuss our sexual matters? I thought that was personal or to be done by the counselor in private?" She rested her hands on her hips. Her pink hair is in a stylish up do today, making her look more hippie. Her naval exposing yellow top matches well with her brown skirt and gladiator sandals.
"Do you have Chlamydia, Violet?" Mrs. Hawkins raised an eyebrow. Everyone in the gym grew quiet.
"Yes, yes I do. Are you happy now, Mrs. Hawkins? The whole school knows that I, Violet Pearson has Chlamydia like a nasty bitch!" she snapped.
Her group of friends and the school's staff gasped in shock. A few people started clapping. Bryson stood up.
"You're the man, Violet!" he yelled. Violet turned back to him, giving him a wink before turning back around.
"You tapped that?" Cole asked.
"Several times, man. You have no idea how hot she is under those clothes. I'm going to ask her out soon." Bryson shrugged.
I gaped. Bryson is going to date crazy Violet? Well, Bryson is kind of weird in his own way anyhow.
"Aw, you're finally going to have a girlfriend, I'm proud." Ashley patted his arm. Cole snickered.
"Detention for you afterschool, Violet." Mrs. Hawkins narrowed her eyes.
"For having Chlamydia or for saying bitch?"
"The latter, now sit down."
"Man, this school fucking sucks!" Bryson stood up again.
"Detention for you too, sir."
Bryson sat back down. "I have now paved the way for my future," he sighed.
"Future what? "Anna whispered.
"My future kids, duh!" he joked. We all started laughing again.
"Back to my original point. Girls, you should try and do something much better with your lives than letting some man in your pants. I know it feels exceptionally good when a boy pays you even the slightest bit of attention, but have some respect for yourselves and your bodies. Is it worth the disease, the pregnancy? Is it worth the shame you will have to face when you get home?"
Everyone grew quiet, pondering her words. I dislike Mrs. Hawkins and I think everyone knows that. But what she is saying is kinda true.
"Boys, having sex with girls when you are supposed to be focused in school doesn't help you either. What happens when you have a baby to take care of? What will you do then? You have no money, that girl doesn't have any money, so what are you to do? Stop trying to be cool by sagging your pants and sleeping with as many girls as you can. Respect yourselves as well because you are better than that."
Bryson and Cole shifted in their spots on the bleachers.
"I hope this is a wakeup call, not only my speech, but that some of you had received Chlamydia in the first place." The bell rang. "Violet and that gentleman in the back can follow me to detention. The rest of you, report to second period."
Bryson stood up. "See you guys at lunch." He smiled and headed for detention.
I wish Mrs. Hawkins's speech ran longer; I don't want to go to English. I waved goodbye to everyone and headed for the halls. For some reason, her speech bothers me. She is so right about everything, yet would anyone really even listen to her words?
I bumped into something hard, hearing the smack of books hitting the tiled floors. I looked up and there is a smoking hot guy in my face. He is tanned, so tanned my heart melted over. He has a shocking pair of honey brown eyes, full eyelashes, very nice lips, and oh that tanned skin. Underneath his blue tee is an evident sight of muscles, and the sexy kind. Not that oh-I-work-out-sometimes kind of muscles, it was the hey-you-earthlings-I-work-out-all-day-everyday-so-suck-on-that kind of muscles. His hair flops into his eyes, that same brown color as his eyes as well.
Shaking it off, I scrambled to pick up his books for him, placing them in his shocked hands. "Sorry for the whole movie scene bump into, I was thinking and so not paying attention." I blushed.
He laughed, pulling me up along with him. "That's fine; I'd bump into a pretty girl like you anytime. I'm Porter."
I smiled. "Hannah."
"I really hope I see you around sometime," he said as he winked.
My insides shuddered. "Anything you say," I whispered. He laughed, chucking me under the chin before walking off. Okay, totally swooning over here. Can you say man candy? Break me a piece off of that chiseled ice and melt it in my mouth. Oh my God, in a pro pro!
Christina and her clique walked by, stopping in front of me. "Hannah, right?" She smiled.
"Oh wow, you know my name, I feel so special," I grunted.
"Detesto tonto perras. Look, stay away from Porter, okay. He's kind of mine."
Wow, this movie is getting more and more intense by the second. Can I win an Oscar? I've always wanted one. "Sorry, no habla español. You're going to have to say the first part again, but in English this time."
"She said, 'I hate bitches.' Was that too hard for you to get?" Jamie tossed her black hair over her shoulder.
"No, it was so easy because I totally know Spanish so fluently it's ridiculous. Did I even ask you in the first place?" I snapped.
"Oh my God. The whole point is that I don't want you to talk to Porter, okay?" Christina interrupted.
I laughed. "Are you threatened by me or something?" Hello, last time I checked, she is Ms. Popular. Wouldn't even surprise me if I never saw him again.
"Why would I be threatened by someone as lame as you?" She got in my face.
She smells like cheap perfume. My poor nostrils. The funny thing is that she is freaking gorgeous, albeit in a skanky way. She is dressed in a super mini skirt; I can practically see her underwear. Not only that, but her tank top exposes her naval piercing and she is wearing matching pumps. Her hair is a dirty blonde because she dyed it that way. She is Salvadorian and makes sure everyone knows the difference.
"That doesn't show when you are telling me to stay away from him." I lifted up one corner of my mouth in a victorious smile.
"This is why you are an ugly wannabe."
"At least I don't look like Christina Aguilera in her Dirty video. Sorry, but that style is so 2003. Go acquire a new one."
A couple people in the hallway started laughing and then whispering my comment to everyone else around them. Christina turned beet red and whipped her head around to silence all those that were laughing.
"I'm going to get you, Hannah I swear I will."
"Will we chick fight in a ring like in the Dirty video? I've always wanted to do that. Let's get gloves!" I squealed. People started laughing even harder.
"Ugh!" she screeched and then stomped off.
"Christina, just ignore her!" Jamie and Madison ran quickly after her. I rolled my eyes.
Someone started clapping and I turned around to face Omunique. "That was brilliant. Remind me not to get on your bad side." She smiled.
"I don't think I'm that bad," I refuted.
She shrugged. "Want to hang out afterschool? I'll meet you right here."
Oh, yes! Fate is so working for me. "Sure, see you later... yo!"
Omunique made a "what the hell" face and then shook her head. "See you later." She walked off. I headed for class.
My last period of the day is boring AP Environmental Science. In all honesty, no one learns anything in this class. It's practically a blow off class. Even the name of it sounds stupid. Winston tapped me on the shoulder and I removed my headphones.
"What?" I hissed. I hate being interrupted when listening to Birdy. Underrated artists like her give me hope for the music industry.
"What are you doing this weekend?" He leaned back in his chair.
I froze. Is he trying to ask me out or something, oh my God? "Nothing... why?" I raised an eyebrow.
"It has been a super long time since I've hung out with Lucas. So, sleepover at yours this weekend?"
"Oh hell no! Last time I woke up with shaving cream on my face!"
"That's because you fell asleep." He chuckled.
I rolled my eyes. When we were all younger, Lucas and Winston used to hang out and play practical jokes on me. It so wasn't fun to be ganged up on, especially by dweebs like them two.
"The answer is no." I started to put my ear buds back in.
Winston put his hand over mine to stop me. I can feel my eyes grow wide at his warm touch. "Please, just ask him for me?" He blinked those heavy eyelashes at me.
"B-but you know he will say yes."
"Just ask," he whispered.
I snatched my hand from his. "Fine, whatever."
"Thanks, Hannah. See you this weekend." He left the room as soon as the bell rang.
I sighed. What have I gotten myself into? Walking into the crowded hallway, I noticed Winston preparing to destroy Anna immediately. Oh no.
He took a deep breath. "Anna, there is something I have to tell you." Ashley, Bryson, Violet, and Cole came to stand beside me.
"Yes?" Anna whispered, a smile evident on her glorious face. Oh God, he is going to crush her.
"You're a great girl and you are great to talk to, but I just don't like you in any other way than that." He braced himself for her whiplash.
"That's okay, Winston. Even though I so wish you did like me, it's seriously fine. Let's just be friends, okay? See you tomorrow." She kissed him on the cheek and then skipped off.
Well, what do you know? Ashley was right after all. Winston shook his head in disbelief and then headed for home.
"That was adorable," Violet whispered.
Bryson laughed. "Maybe a little." He kissed her.
I narrowed my eyes. "See you guys tomorrow." I headed over to a relaxed Omunique. "You ready?"
"It's Friday, I'm always ready." She led me to a Chevy Colorado. In the front seat are two black guys, one with a snapback on and another with dreads.
Mr. Scott walked by, whistling. "Have a great weekend, Hannah."
"You too. Why are you so cheerful?" I asked.
"It's Friday. Plus, I get to see a beautiful woman this weekend." There he goes mentioning the idea of some woman more often than Lindsay Lohan got convicted of DUIs.
"Well have fun."
"You too, and be safe." He got in his Audi Coupe and drove off.
I got in the back of the Chevy and prayed to God that I didn't make an ass out of myself. Omunique got in as well and the car pulled out of the parking lot.
"Yo, Chris! Where the music at?" Omunique yelled.
"You want Future, Drake, or what?" Chris asked, his eyes focused on the road as he picked up his phone.
"Just turn on the radio," Omunique suggested.
Next thing I know, 97.9 the Beat was blasting in my ears. I hardly ever listen to 97.9 because it is the hip-hop station. I am more of a 106.1 person, because they play pop music. A Drake song filled the car and I stared out the window, fiddling with my hands.
"What you listen to, white gur?" the black guy in the passenger seat asked.
I blushed. "106.1,"I whispered. He laughed.
"Are you going to put it on there, Mike?" Chris asked.
"Yeah." He switched the station. An Adele song blared through the car and my lips twitched up into a smile. I guess Adele is universal.
Finally the car stopped at the destination after endless minutes of station alternating. I stepped out of the car and Omunique opened up the backyard gate. We all sat down on the patio furniture and I watched as Chris unraveled a bag from beneath a flowerpot and Mike leaned back in his seat to peer at me.
"Have you ever smoked before?" Mike asked me.
"Smoked what?" I whispered. Why I'm whispering I don't know.
"Weed, duh." He laughed. Omunique bit her lip to hold back her laughter as well.
"Um, no," I admitted.
"You want to?"
"Not really."
"Oh, come on! There is a first time for everything." He winked at me.
Oh God, the peer pressure. Massive and massive amounts of peer pressure. I so get why they teach us this in school now. "No, it's okay, seriously. You guys just go ahead."
Chris rolled up a blunt on the patio table, his face completely absorbed in his craft. "She doesn't have to if she doesn't want to. More weed for us." Chris shrugged.
"Don't mind them, they had this planned since the moment they opened their eyes this morning." Omunique scooted closer to me. "So, what's up with you?"
"Nothing much, just trying to graduate in one piece." I gave a nervous laugh.
"Me too, I guess." She looked away and then back again with a painful smile on her face.
"What's wrong?" I asked, scooting closer to her. I feel like the more I focus on my story, the more I feel like a psychiatrist or double agent rather than a journalist.
"When I broke up with Matthew, I thought I'd feel much better, you know? But I don't." She lifted up one shoulder in a lazy sort of shrug and then huffed out a short laugh. "Why does it always seem like we as people feel comfortable talking to strangers about our innermost feelings?"
"Probably because we figure we won't have to see them again, see their perspective of us change. But if you need to find yourself, then I guess it's the risk you have to take." I laid a hand on her arm.
"It was all bullshit, Hannah. I didn't break up with him so I could 'find myself'. Like, what does that even mean?" She sighed.
"You cheated on him?" I gasped. I'll say anything so she'll tell me whom she slept with.
She gave me that "what the hell" face that I am starting to become familiar with. "Nah, it's just that... well you can't tell anyone, okay?"
"Secret is safe with me." I leaned in, curious.
"Matthew is smart, you know? He wants to be an engineer, he has a 4.0 GPA, studies all day and night long, his family supports him, and they are a long line of NYU graduates, Hannah. Me? I'm a ratchet girl with no family to support me, I smoke weed all the time, and I make all A's and the occasional two B's. I'm not good enough for someone like him; I just hold him back. That's why I left him, Hannah, because he deserves better."
My heart melted over and I began to see her in a new light. She isn't as basic as I thought; she's more complex with layers. (Honestly that's shitty of me like I don't know why I thought she'd be basic. This is why I don't have any friends). She sees herself as a burden to someone so talented and smart. That has to hurt. "Omunique that is no excuse to leave him. He loves you because you make something out of the nothing you were given. Trust me, it doesn't matter what obstacles came across his life, you were the one he wanted to face them with."
Omunique's eyes filled with tears. "I just feel he is too good for me. While he goes to NYU, I'm probably going to go to community college, and maybe not even that. Why make him feel like he has to go to UT Arlington or something so he can stay close to me? I want him to do bigger and better things. I want him to become something with his life, I love him that much, Hannah that I want that for him."
"Listen to me. Some are taught that men define women and some are taught that women define men. But hardly any people are taught that women and men define each other. You are his world too just like he was yours. You taught him things he never knew, and he teaches you things you never knew. Let him decide if you are holding him back. I want you to tell him all that you told me and let him decide."
"He'd decide to be with me, Hannah. We've been together for five years, he's a loyal man, and he wouldn't give up what we have."
I blushed, remembering his tongue in my mouth. "Then that's what you need! Stop berating yourself; you're a much better person than you give yourself credit for. I bet you got Chlamydia after you left him, didn't you?"
"I slept with this guy named Hector so that I'd feel better. Ha, bad idea, right?" She cleared her throat and then wiped away her tears.
"Hey, Omunique smoke it off, don't cry." Chris handed her a blunt and she laughed, accepting it. After a while, she settled down and her eyes turned a little red.
I stared at the blunt. If it does all of that for someone as distressed as her, maybe it isn't so bad after all. Aw shit, I'm going to smoke this. "Can I uh, try or whatever?" I blushed at my incomplete knowledge of weed.
Mike laughed. "It's your first time, so you're going to cough like crazy, but you'll be high after like two times at least, maybe even one." He handed me the blunt.
I eyed it with wary eyes. Omunique sat up to watch and Chris patted her back like a good loyal friend. Oh God, don't let me die today. I put my lips on it and took in a good long pull. I pulled away and coughed all of the weed out of my system. AH! Oh my God, oh my freaking God, why am I coughing so much? I bent over to help myself and Mike patted me on the back pretty hard to help me cough it all out. My eyes watered as I coughed and I rubbed incessantly at my eyes, my eyes closing as I faced the ground.
When my lungs were free I sat back and then opened up my eyes. Yeah, I'm pretty sure I'm high. My body feels weightless and languid. If I were to stand up I don't even know if I could walk. I lay back in my lawn chair and stared at absolutely nothing. It just felt good to exist.
"Hannah, how do you feel?" Mike asked me.
After a while of processing the question, I turned to face him. "I feel fucking awesome." After another while of processing, I asked, "Hey, doesn't that cloud look like a Teletubbie?" I pointed to the sky.
Omunique looked and then started laughing. "It does!"
"Wow, you two are high as fuck right now," Chris whispered.
"Why are you whispering?" I laughed, frowning. Then a spark of inspiration hit me. "Want to hear my rap? I just came up with it." I giggled, everything swirling around me in such a good way.
"Go for it." Omunique smiled.
"Bitches wanna buy from me, stealing from my armory, ain't my fault that they money is going to da government fees. One on my jock, two by mouth, hoes, hoes, hoes, with cocaine on they nose. No education, no knowledge, no college, they buying my weed, there's no way they can get the best of me. Listenin' to that Weezy man, fighting for outta the garbage can, I pimp hoes cuz I can, and so get up off my man!" I doubled over with laughter and then everybody else joined in. Maybe rap is not for me.
"I love you guys!" I squealed. Omunique laughed.
The rest of the afternoon went by in a blur; I have no recollection of it. I think I laughed the entire time.
"Alright, Hannah it's time to go, come on." Omunique grabbed me and led me to the car. Is it okay for her to drive in her...condition?
"Hannah chill with us again sometime, okay?" Mike called out after me. I just giggled.
Omunique put me in the car and drove me home. I don't remember telling her where I lived. She parked in the driveway and walked me up to my door, ringing the doorbell.
"Hey you are so pretty, do you know that?" I placed my hand on her shoulder.
"Thank you, Hannah." She gave me that "what the hell" face again, her eyebrows furrowed, the left one slightly raised, and her lips pursed. Yes, definitely familiar now.
"I forgot to tell you that I kind of made out with Matthew one time, well a few times in one day."
Omunique laughed, waving it away. "That's okay, Hannah. He was fair ground."
Lucas opened the front door, his face laced with worry. Then he leaned in to get a good look at me and his eyes lit up in surprise. "Holy shit! Are you high, Hannah?" A slow smile crept up on his face.
"Probably." I looked down at my feet. "I want some ice cream."
"It was her first time. Blame me if you want to get mad. Don't tell your parents or anything, okay? Hannah is an amazing girl and I'd hate to see her in trouble," Omunique pleaded.
"My mom wouldn't do anything anyway. It's nice to see perfect little Hannah having actual teenage experiences. Are ya'll friends?"
Omunique smiled at me. "Yeah, we are great friends." She passed me off to Lucas.
"Bye, Omunique!" I screamed. She waved and got in her car.
Lucas closed the door and after he observed me just standing in the living room, he picked me up and carried me to my bedroom, laying me down on the bed. He went to the bathroom and poured me a glass of water, putting it on my bedside table.
My eyes drooped with sleep. "I'm tired."
"I know you are. Long day, huh?"
"Yes. Oh! Winston wants to spend a night this weekend." Look at that, I remembered.
Lucas smiled with glee. "Tell him to come over on Saturday if you can remember. Your eyes are really red." He touched my face. "Go to sleep." He turned to leave.
"Hey, Lucas?"
"Yes," he said, turning back.
"Guess what I learned?"
"What?" He smiled.
"Once you go black, you so want to go back."
Lucas laughed for a good five minutes.