Jessie
I wasn't aware of my surroundings, all I was feeling was shock. All I knew was that Rachel was dragging me along with her, our arms linked, and I let her. I didn't know where she was taking me, but I let her. I remembered a car. Rachel took a cab. I also remembered Nathan pulling me up, or was it Rachel? I didn't quite remember.
But I'm sure I heard Nathan's voice, also there was Sam's voice in my mind.
Every time I heard it I turned around to find Rachel beside me, not Sam. But I swear Sam was calling me. And the voice got louder every second. But after finding Rachel for the hundredth beside me, I realized I was just imagining it. Rachel was talking. She was talking a lot, sometimes she was whispering, other times her voice was louder.
I had no idea that she was talking to me about at that moment. Was she talking to the taxi driver? Or me? I became aware of what was happening when we finally reached the apartment. Rachel helped me sit in the sofa in our guest room. Then I cried. I cried and cried. Rachel cried with me too. She was trying her best not show her crying face to me, but I saw her anyways. And I felt bad for making her cry too. But I couldn't help it. I needed to get all of my sadness out of my chest. I didn't care about my torn dress, or my ruined makeup, or my pride.
I was a little bit embarrassed for making such a scene in Nathan's party. I thought I should apologize to him later. This made me sad yeah, but what made me sad more than that, was what Emma did.
Did I really deserve that?
Did I really do such a big crime?
Was I really a heartless bitch? As Emma called me.
Was, what I did, that wrong?
I didn't want to steal anyone's boyfriend or crush. I wasn't even aware that they were in a relationship for god's love. Why did Emma do that? What happened to our friendship? To understanding? I don't understand. Maybe she loves Samuel more than me. Maybe she was just mad at me and didn't understand what was going on. But why the hell did she humiliate me like that? Now everybody's going to think I have wanted to make an affair with Sam or cheat on my best friend. But that's not the truth. I just wanted love.
A stupid love. My subconscious muttered. She's right. It was a stupid love. Let's be honest... It wasn't actually love, it was just a crush. She's right again. It wasn't like I had known Sam for that long, I just got to know him for a while in the library, while we were studying together.
I always thought I didn't fall for appearances, but looks like I had been wrong all those times. Sam was handsome, and I was attracted to his handsome features. But he also had a kind heart, and an amazing personality. What has attracted me to him? I don't know.
"Do you want some water?" Rachel's voice interrupted my chain of thoughts.
I stared at my best friend, who didn't look better than me. Her makeup was ruined just like mine, her red hair had become frizzy. The only difference between us was our dresses, mine was torn everywhere, thankfully my skin was not showing much. But hers was intact. And still lovely.
Her bright beautiful eyes stared at me with worry. She bit her lip, and her head was titled to her right side a little, something she usually did when she was worried or nervous. Rachel has been my best friend all these years, you would call her wild and rude if you didn't know her, but once you get to know her you'll realize she's very innocent and kind. In fact I have never met anyone as kind hearted as Rachel Evans. So unlike Emma, who is calm and innocent on the outside.
This is why one should never judge a book by it's cover. The more honest a person is, the better. I nodded my head in yes, and wiped my face with a piece of my torn dress, which I had torn from my dress. Rachel got up and slowly walked towards the kitchen. While she was away, I happened to think of many things.
Including Sam and Emma.
Emma.
Sam.
Emma and Sam.
I was about to follow Rachel to the kitchen, when I suddenly heard Emma's voice.
"Jessie?"
I frowned and looked around, but Emma was nowhere to be found. Then I heard the doorbell ring, and I smiled immediately and ran to open it up.
Emma has come to apologize.
Emma regrets it.
Emma loves me.
Emma has come to see meeeee.
I breathed in deeply to calm my nerves then I opened up the door. But my smile immediately dropped when I saw no one, absolutely no one standing at the doorstep. I looked around the small corridor. And even looked the way of the elevator, but I couldn't see anyone.
"Jessie?" Rachel said. She was standing right beside me frowning while looking at me "what's wrong?"
"I-I heard the doorbell ring, and Emma was calling me. It was her..." I said in a hurry, then I stared back at the dark, empty corridor.
"Emma?" Rachel asked, I nodded without staring at her and searched for Emma in the corridor. "Why would that bitch come here after what she did?"
I shrugged and bit my lower lip "I don't know, but I swear it was her. She was calling me." Rachel sighed and put her hands on each of my shoulders, then she slowly turned me around and stared right into my eyes.
"You were imagining things Jessie." Rachel mumbled "there's no Emma standing there. You just imagined her because you want to see her... And because you wish what has happened today was only a dream."
She's right you know.
Both Rachel and my subconscious were right, I was only imaging her. I wish things were different, I wish I had told her about my crush on Sam. Then she would have told me he's her boyfriend, and we wouldn't have come this way. I wish she could just understand. But she was just so stubborn and mad that I couldn't even imagine what talking to her was going be like. And I know, no matter how much I wish it hasn't happened, what has happened, happened. And there's nothing I can do about it. There's nothing to turn back the time and do things differently. At least time showed me who was my true friend and who was not.