I glanced out of the carriage window to see Edwin waving back at me. He was not smiling, but I could see it in his eyes. He was happy for me. Although he was trying to put in a good face for Sirus. Attempting to intimidate him. That ofcourse would not work but I let him keep his threatening face on while waving goodbye to me.
"Queen-"
"-It is Esmerelda," I retorted to the coachman who looked at me with a nervous look as he nodded his head in understanding.
"There is a storm up ahead. I would like to roll down the thick curtains," the man gulped as I smiled nodding my head.
I wanted to be called Esmerelda. Nothing more or less. All my titles have been stripped from me. Not from someone else's accord, but from my own. The name I would go by while on this short voyage to see my friends. To get to know my son better. I was simply Esmerelda and I swore that the moment someone called me a formality, I would be gone. Unless it was Lady Esmerelda or Mother. Even William wished to remain calling me Queen and I respectfully declined it.
"Queen...ah Esmerelda?"
William and I were in our carriage, right behind Thorian and Sirus. William had told me he could sustain to sit in a carriage with Sirus, but I knew Sirus was not capable of doing that. It was impossible. "Yes William?"
I could tell he did not feel comfortable in the slightest calling me by my name and that was that. He would just have to handle it and that was that. "How long will our stay be? I would never rush this time here with your son and friend but I would just like to know."
I laughed softly, "You have to get home to your secret lover, yes?"
He glowered at me as I laughed even more. I always talked of a secret lover with him and each time I had mentioned it, he would combat that with some very personal profession of how close we are and how he would never keep any secrets from me...regarding women of course. I knew William had his secrets...I knew them of course anyway.
"I am worried about Edwin is all. His proposal...is an interesting one." Yes, it was and I was worried sick about him also, but he is King as he has stated to many times before. To the point of me almost throttling him. Which seemed to be a common thought since he has become King.
"I agree...but I will not sit about and watch him like a nurse maid. We have given him as much as advice and knowledge as we could give him, William. If he does not choose to use it, it will be his legacy." Of course if things became too crazy I would just have to speak with him or possibly overthrow him.
He chuckled, "I suppose he will be fine. I am just adamant about coming here. It just seems surreal that the man that has caused so much damage to our kingdom...to you is opening his home to you to just simply visit." It did sound...surreal but it was true.
My hand went to his, holding it. "It is surreal for me to accept his invitation and bring you."
"Touche."
***
"Esmerelda...wake up."
Tired eyes slowly opened at the sound of a familiar voice calling in my ear. I sighed, slowly taking in my surroundings as I noticed that the carriage had stopped.
I was leaning against William, my head pressed into his chest and his arm wrapped loosely against me. I glanced up to see him staring down at me, a smile on his lips. "Finally you have awaken."
It was not my fault that I had a long last two days...this was the best sleep I have ever had in my entire life. Most likely due to that...chain/bond being broken.
Before I had the chance to sit up, the carriage door swung open. Sirus and another man stood at the door. His eyes immediately going to where we were touching.
"We are here," He said curtly, before he turned around and walked away from us. Thorian had appeared and helped me out of the carriage, a grim smile on his face as he glanced back at William.
"Aunt Chelsea will be happy to see you," he grumbled as he pulled me along the path up to the castle. I did not recognize any of the guards but they all dropped to one knee as we passed. Sirus in front of us, ofcourse. I glanced back to see William behind us, a grim smile on his face.
As we made it up the castle steps, I realized how truly out of shape I was and awful these stairs were! Maybe because I was younger they didn't seem to have any effects on me, but now that I was older. It was a bit of a chore.
The large castle doors were pulled open and we were met with at least two dozen servants. They all bowed to us and I watched as Thorian was watching me...a slight smile to his lips. Which surprised me. He had not smiled much in the last two days. Instead wore the same look as Sirus always did. A stone like demeanor.
"They have done all of this for their love of you, mother," he told me as he snarled at a guard who was staring a bit too long at me. I gently patted him on the arm, realizing he was extremely tense and guarded. I expected this from SIrus, not from Thorian. Of course I did not mind, as long as he did not become violent.
I smiled at him, "How very nice of them," I told them as I noticed that Sirus was glancing back at the two of us. He was a ways away from us and I was surprised that he was not smothering me. I was not here for him though, but for Thorian and I would be the one doing the smothering! I have misses seventeen years of my sons life and I was determined to make it up to him.
"Uncle Sirus why are you back so soon?"
I heard a feminine voice question loudly. My eyes searched around for the young voice and I found the source of that voice by a tall girl who resembled a very dear friend to me. She stood at the threshold of one of the rooms down the hall. Her long dark hair whipping behind her as she rushed down the hall. Her eyes were very calculating like a certain someone I used to know and even her frown was as spitting image of her mothers!
"Where are your parents?" Sirus questioned ignoring her question as she approached him and pressed her cheek against his. She growled after doing so while making a very unlady like face. "Esa, I do not have time for your immaturity."
She mocked Sirus before he snarled again, and she bowed quickly, a small smile on her lips. "Forgive me Uncle Sirus. I just missed you is all...and well they are currently laying with one another. They are very loud and it is actually very disgusting so I would suggest you not interrupt them."
Oh my. I could never even imagine saying something like that when I was her age...then again, a small amount of the old me might just dare to say it. I watched as she looked past Sirus and towards Thorian and I. "Cousin!" She yelped, as she flew past Sirus and a few other men and made a very strong impact into Thorian. "I missed you so much. I had no worthy opponents in my sparring matches!" She exclaimed as Thorian attempted to remove her from him but she was stuck like some sort of adhesive to him.
It was actually quiet comical. "Esa get off!" Thorian complained as he finally had maneged to rid himself of her. I watched as she put her nose up in the air...her eyes suddenly widening as they landed on me.
"You...you are the woman who single handly destroyed my Uncle!" She exclaimed as I glared at Sirus. He destroyed me, I have done nothing to destroy him! What has he been telling thees children?
"Esa!"
"Oh Aunt Esmerelda it is a pleasure to meet you! Tell me how did you manage to break my uncle? I need to learn how to break down my mate, he is insane! We have not even wed yet and he is already speaking of populating this castle with many children! I do not like children, I tell you!" She cried out as she grabbed me in a bone crushing hug. I was not prepared at all for this. I did not understand...many things.
Like who told her that I had destroyed Sirus and why did she want to destroy her betrothed? "Esa off my mother, you know humans are fragile," Thorian growled out as I felt her being pulled away from me. I was a bit horrified as Thorian pulled her away and she bit him! He snarled at her and I was a bit nervous that a fight might break out between the two.
"Enough, you two! You settle this in a sparring match not in front of guests," Sirus growled out glaring at both of them as the two young adults did nothing to stop their irate eye contact. Sirus strided over to both of them, his verbal threat coupled with the closeness of him...had both of them quickly deflating their anger and sombering up rather quickly.
I cleared my throat, interfering with her vision of Thorian. "Esa, was it? It's nice to meet you..You are the eldest, yes?" I asked as she nodded proudly, getting ready to speak before we heard a loud scream.
I instantly felt a hand on my shoulder and realizied it was Calfont. We both looked around to see if any threat was about to come upon us. Everyone else did not seem to worried though. Both Esa and Thorian made faces only a mother could love and Sirus shook his head. "Uncle Sirus if you would like to speak to my father now, they are done with their endevours."
Oh...so that was not a yell of well pain but of passion. My cheeks warmed as I thought of my what on earth Rowan must have been doing to my dear friend... "Come mother, I will show you where you will sleep...oh and you, human," Thorian growled out the last part his eyes going over to Calfont who did not seem deterred by the negative remark Thorian made.
"I will see you tomorrow, Aunt Esmerelda!"
"Nice to meet you, Esa!" I told her as Thorian dragged me down the hall quickly, almost making me trip! He instantly slowed down once he noticed he was walking incredibly too fast for me and gave me a sheepish grin.
I glanced back to see that Calfont was still behind us, a smile still on his face. Although it looked stressed. I hope this trip was not too much for him. I just...needed him with me. Dearly. As we walked down the long halls, making turns and stops, things began to become familiar to me.
My clothes began to feel a bit constricted...and my heart felt like it would burst right out of my chest. It was just as I remembered. So close to...our room. His room. I had told myself that it was not possible. They would not have me stay in the same room that I have stayed in before. It gave rise to, to many awful memories. I could not. But as I continued to walk, I was gently pulled back...directly in front of the door that I wanted nothing to do with.
"This is your room, mother," Thorian said proudly.
"Esmerelda are you alright?" Calfont questioned as I shook my head, Thorian looking at me with confusion. I did not want to make him worry but I could not possibly stay here. Not at all. It would be too painful. It would defeat the purpose of me visiting.
I took a few minutes to gather my wits, trying to think of any excuse not to go into this room. "Oh well I just realized that i did not like staying in this wing of the castle. It often made me sick...maybe because the sun."
Both of them looked down at me as if I were insane. "The sun?" Thorian questioned as I nodded my head, hoping he would not ask any further questions. That was about the most awful lie I have ever told!
Calfont cleared his throat, "Yes the sun, ofcourse Prince Thorian. Any one with knowledge of Esmerelda knows that the sun setting in the West effects her...feet." I had to put a hand over my mouth. Calfont just made this lie go from awful to horrible within seconds! We both watched my son go through a few quick emotions before he rubbed the back of his head.
"I know that, human...that is why you will be staying in this room." I hid a small smile as Calfont nodded his head with a small thanks to Thorian as the guards following behind us began to open the room and load his items in.
I noticed their was a servant girl in the chamber. She seemed to be cleaning and I watched as Thorian was staring her down intensely. "Margaret." She paused in her ministrations and immediately turned towards the door. Her cheeks reddened tremendously as she averted her gaze and bowed.
"Prince Thorian, I am so glad of your safe return," she said quickly as she bowed even lower. After she said that her eyes wandered to me and she gasped. Instead of bowing, she quickly went on her knees, bowing to me. "Queen Esmerelda! We have awaited your return for-"
"-Margaret my mother is just visiting," Thorian said quickly. I wanted to insert to not call me 'Queen' but the girl already seemed entirely too flustered. "The pelts that I have made for her will be moved to another room," he explained to her as she nodded quickly. She went over to the bed and grabbed these large pelts, almost bigger than her and made her way blindly to the door. "Margaret, let a guard handle those things..." Thorian told her as he grabbed the pelts from her and tossed them to a man who quickly caught them, almost falling over as he did so.
Her cheeks that were already pink in comparison, turned as red as a fruit. "I appreciate your kindness, Prince Thorian." It would seem that this servant has a crush on Thorian. I wondered if he noticed it or not...or was he just being a kind man like I hoped he had turned out to be.
Once the guards were finished loading Calfont's things into the room, Thorian attempted to pull me along to my room. I was not ready to go yet. I wanted to speak to Calfont before I settled into my own bedchamber. "Thorian, have a guard escort me to my room later. I would like to speak with Lord Calfont alone."
Thorian frowned, his eyes going to Calfont. Nothing kind was in that look he had given him. Nothing at all...and it reminded me of Sirus so much. It gave me chills. "Mother that is not appropiate."
My own son telling me what is and is not appropriate? That will not do at all... "Thorian, I am your mother, yes?" He sounded like Edwin. Which made me want to both laugh and angered me.
"Yes."
"And I am a fully grown woman, yes?"
"Yes."
I smiled, my hand going to his cheek. "Then leave me be, with my friend and do not question my actions. Please." He squared his jaw, his eyes darting to Calfont. My hand gently forced him to look back at me. Was he afraid that Calfont might hurt me? "He is a trusted friend, Thorian. Nothing more."
He sighed, kissing my hand before he quickly left the room. Slamming the door shut ratherly loudly. I jumped at how loud it sounded. "Nothing more?" William questioned as I rolled my eyes, my hands wiping over my face.
"The sun setting in the west makes my feet ache?"
He was the first one to chuckle. Then we both began to laugh. Uncontrollable laughter spilled from my lips as I looked around this room. It was still as if I lived here...still as if I was thrown into this room. Threatening to take my own life. My walls were quickly breaking down. Laughter turned to tears and I felt Calfont's hand slip onto my shoulder. "What is it, Esmerelda?"
"This is the room," I told him as he looked around it, his eyes scanning each and every crevice. I did not know if heexpected Sirus to pop out of out thin air, but the thought made me want to laugh even more. "My room that I was kept in before we were married. AT the time it was a safe haven...but it was a holding cell for the real prison."
Calfont suddenly let go of me. I watched as he got up and walked over to the door, swinging it open. "You may go as you please, Esmerelda. You are liberated from this place and he will never have such a hold on you anymore. I promise you that. Leave, do not come back in here...if you wish I can visit you in whatever room you are in, but you do not need to be in here. If it caused you much pain."
"I know I am physically allowed to...but still."
"If you would like, I could destroy this room. Well everything in it...light it ablaze say it was an accident."
He sounded just like Edwin and it actually scared me. No wonder those two were always at opposing ends... "No, I think I will just go to my bedchamber now...if you would like you can visit me tonight."
"Of course, my Queen...I mean Esmerelda."
****
Yes first chapter.
This was so much fun making.
Any thoughts or ideas you would like to see? If I do write it out and put your idea into a chapter I'll give you credit for it!
I might update this twice a week.
Anyway hope you guys enjoyed this chapter!