"I'm better than that precious Sahara of yours, aren't I?"
"Mmmm..."
Sahara pulls open the door and gasps at the event taking place in front of her. All of a sudden, the world became a blur, and it was almost if she has lost all her senses.
She could feel her breathing stop midway as if someone had her in a chokehold position. Tears burst out with a loud sob following it. She falls to the floor, her knees hitting the ground with an extremely loud thud making the fall sound extremely painful.
Her breathing became heavier and heavier but it feels like there was no oxygen to begin with. Her body fighting to force her to breathe with no success. Her throat burning with the sobs she's trying to hold back.
She opens her mouth to say something, anything but her whole body begins quivering to the point where she couldn't form words.
She feels her heart crushing from the pressure of the pain. It feels like as if death has come for because she couldn't bear any of this. It feels like someone had just ripped out her heart, tore it into a million pieces and stepped on it on their way out.
Viktor grabs a hold of her shoulders and shakes her firmly, "Sahara! Sahara! Are you conscious?"
Damian runs to Sahara and is about to touch her shoulder when she slaps his hand away. She finally manages to take control of her vocal chords, "D-don't touch me! Don't you d-d-dare touch me! What did I do to you? I must've done something h-horribly cruel to you to d-deserve this."
"Sahara, listen to me. I–"
"No, Damian! No! I don't have the energy, I... I'm tired... I just can't..." Sahara feels weak, she could feel her conscious going in and out, her head spinning.
She runs out of the room, across the hall and locks herself in the guest bedroom. Her back slides down the wall as she cries into her hands, her streams of tears leaking through her fingers.
After hours of crying and hours of Viktor and Damian trying to get her to open the door, she feels something. That something is nothing. Her skin feels cold, it was almost as if her blood had run cold. Her hands and feet are numb, she couldn't feel them. Her heart, oh her heart, it has been stomped on, ripped apart, drowned in water, but suddenly she feels nothing.
No, the extremely unbearable pain is there but something inside her stopped turning. And at that moment, it hits her, she's broken. She has been hurt to the point where her emotions feel as if they're nonexistent. Her heart feels as if it has stopped beating, her lungs feel as if they have stopped helping her breathe, she couldn't feel anything but emptiness and loneliness.
She's won't be able to put herself together, there's no coming back from what Damian has done, what he's destroyed in the sweet Sahara. She's lost her ability to believe, to have hope, to look at the brighter side of things, she lost herself. The sweet, innocent Sahara, who viewed the world with so much love has disappeared. She has fallen apart and piecing her back together is uncertainty.
She wipes the last streaks of tears from her face, her expression blank, her skin almost a grey tone; "I'm beaten, bruised and broken. There's no coming back from that."
• • •
Damian's palms are dark red and looking as they are about to start bleeding. He's been knocking and banging on Sahara's door for hours. Her cries stopped and there is silence on the other side, which terrifies him even more. What if she hurt herself? Did she fall unconscious? Does he even have the right over her anymore?
He knocks on the door a few more times, "Sahara, open the door, please, please." His tone almost begging.
"I think you need to leave or else she won't come out." Viktor says in a stern voice.
Damian ignores Viktor and keeps knocking on the door. The door opens, to Viktor and Damian's surprise.
"Sahara?" Damian calls out. The girl who just walked out of the room is Sahara but didn't resemble her.
Her blank expression, puffy nose and eyes, her tear streaked cheeks, but there is something that Damian notices: her eyes. Her eyes eyes are red from the uncontrollable crying, it looks blank yet so full of pain.
Sahara speaks in a monotone voice, with a tinge of pain in her voice. However, without a single bit of hesitation, she says, "I want a divorce. I will make it easy for you and your lawyer: I do not need any part of your wealth or property. I want the divorce papers in my hand by the end of the month or I will contact a lawyer instead."
Damian's heart sinks to his stomach, divorce? Sahara begins to walk away when Damian grabs ahold of her wrist, "Sahara, listen to me."
Sahara gives Viktor the look to tell him to wait outside for her. He leaves the room but stays close by.
Sahara violently shakes off his hold from her wrist, "Listen to what, Mr. Vasiliev? You beg me to stay yet you hurt me. I keep coming back, I keep forgiving, and at the end, it's always me, it's always me who ends up falling apart into an infinite number of pieces."
"Sahara, I didn't... I just... it's just that you left and I turned into a fucking mess. I thought you weren't coming back..."
Sahara puts on a sad smile, "I hope you learn how to overpower your ego, I hope you learn how to put others first, I hope you learn how to love someone, truly."
Sahara could feel her insides twisting and turning from the pain of this goodbye. Her heart couldn't help but reach out to Damian one last time. One last touch before it's all over, one last feeling of his skin, one last look at his beautiful eyes, one last look at his tattoos, which she has memorized from examining it to much.
She is trying her best not to touch him but she's already hurting so much, touching him one last time couldn't possibly hurt more. She leans against his forehead, their noses touching. Her lips begin quivering, asking for one last kiss before it's all over for them.
Their lips only inches apart, as she says, "I don't think you ever loved me, I think it was all lust and desire but I truly hope you fall in love someday, it's the most beautiful yet the most tragic thing."
"Sahara... I..." Damian has never felt so much discomfort, so much pain, so much suffering in the entirety of his life. Yet, he couldn't say the three simple words, he couldn't tell her he loves her because he doesn't think he's worth it. He knows he cannot live without her, however, he also knows he's not worth it, he knows she deserves better.
Sahara places a hand over his mouth, "Shh... you'll be fine. You'll forget about me soon and find someone better suited for you."
Damian wouldn't say this out loud: I won't, I won't ever forget you, I'll never move on, but I most certainly deserve this. I bloody deserve this so fucking much.
Damian is desperate for one last kiss as much as Sahara, just one touch of the lips. However, he's afraid the moment their lips touch, neither would pull apart, especially himself.
Sahara couldn't control herself, their lips were so close, she could feel her lips tingle from the 'almost' touch. She leans in and places a kiss on his lips but the moment she does, his lips are locks onto hers. His hands resting on her cheeks. She can tell he does not want to let go as much as she her.
Both knew they have to pull away, but how? How will they end it when they're so addicted to each other? Neither had the control to not lose themselves in each other. A small moan escapes Sahara's lips and that made Damian's insides flutter, his automatic instinct was to make the kiss deeper. However, he knew if this went on any longer, Sahara would be hurt more.
But before he could stop it, Sahara pulls back. She places her hand softly over his mouth, "I'm sorry. I didn't mean to kiss you... it just happened... I'm sorry I'm making this harder on both of us."
Tears spring free from her eyes as she says her last goodbye, "I hope we never have to cross paths again, Mr. Vasiliev." She wipes away her tears.
"Sahara..." Damian can't do this. He can't let her ago. He wants to hear his name from her mouth one last time, but with all the money he has, his name from her mouth is too much of a luxury he cannot afford.
Everything inside of him feels like it's shutting down. Why is he such a fuck up? Why is he a so afraid of love? "Goodbye." Damian turns away, not being able to bear the pain of her leaving.
Sahara is a little disappointed he didn't stop her, or he didn't confess his feelings. But then she asks herself, was he ever in love with her? Her heart became heavy and her head became light. She could hold herself up and begins tripping but Viktor has caught her on time.
"Sahara, you need to be careful." Viktor says as he holds onto her arm.
Sahara doesn't reply, her expression blank as if all the emotions from inside of her has be sucked out. She has been drained of any life that she had within herself. She knows life doesn't depend on person that you love, she knows people in the world have moved on from such heartbreaks. But, how will she?
Damian became the centre of her world and now she doesn't have a centre. The centre of her life is in shambles and it will take her forever to put herself back together, if she ever has the chance to become whole.
"Goodbye" replays in her head over and over again. "Why did you say goodbye, Damian?!Why couldn't you fight harder for us?!" She yells at herself. She turns to Viktor, "Why didn't he stop me? Why did he do this to me? Why did I deserve this?" Sahara bursts into loud sobs.
He finally cared for someone other than himself, Sahara. He wanted you to have a second chance at life, a fresh start without his toxic behaviour. I know it's hard to believe but this is the most correct and unselfish decision he's made in his entire life, Viktor thought to himself.
He stays silent as he lets Sahara vent because it should be healthy but she looks nowhere near healing down.
It'll take time, Viktor. She took a big blow to her heart today, he says to himself in his head. I just hope Damian won't ruin himself after this, was the last lingering thought he had as he drove towards the direction of Ria and Sahara's apartment.
• • •
[Sneak Peak For The Next Chapter]
"How do we get our old Sahara back?" Ria couldn't focus on studying.
Viktor has come by to check up on Sahara, but there's no improvement, "I don't know... I know the mere mentioning of his name irks you. However, Damian's doing just as worst."
"You're right, I don't care about him! Tell him to bring my Sahara back to me!!! What did he do to her??"
Viktor sighs, "This is how love and heartbreaks work."
- - -
A/N: ok, wow, this was even more depressing than the chapter before this. 😩 Why do I do this to myself and all my readers? 😭
Would this be an intermission? 😂
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