We spent the day talking about our lives and getting to know each other. Craig said he thought my pb & j's were the best in the world.
Now, we were both crawled into a tree, laughing at our own jokes. In the tree, we both sat in the nook between a spread of thick branches. We had been playing truth or dare, well more like dare or dare.
It was Craig's turn to dare me and he seemed well invested into what he was planning to say. Without asking me a dare, he started to crawled down the tree and walk back to the clearing by the small lake. He looked back at me and waved his fingers commanding me to come with him.
I slowly crawled out of the tree and went to follow him. When we got to the small cliffs edge, he seemed to have a twinkle in his eye. The day was still a while till sun down, but the sun would soon be covered by the trees. The sky seemed to be traced with the orange of the sun.
"Tweek, I have your dare, if you think you're up for it?" He teased me as he walked right to the edge of the cliff. I quickly stood to his side.
"I'm ready for what ever you -AH- throw at me!" I stated back to him, stretching my back to seem taller. He laughed as he looked at my stance and then continued.
"I want you, to jump off this ledge, and go swimming."
"WHAT! GAH! CRAIG THAT'S CRAZY!"
"So you're chickening out?" He said with a overly dramatic tone. My heart was beating in my chest as he brought his face closer to mine.
"RRRR FINE!" I turned my face away from his so he wouldn't see how flustered I was. I could see his shocked but still pleased face in the corner of my eye. I took off my shirt in a hurry, and then my pants.
I threw them down on the blanket we had sat down when we arrived. Turning back to the cliffs edge, I could feel my face heat up again. I was only doing this because I wanted to seem cool in front of Craig. I nervously looked down, not looking at Craig. I swear I could feel his eyes tracing up and down me, but it was probably just my head fooling with me. I took a few steps back, and looked at Craig.
His face almost seemed like it was tinted pink, or maybe it was the sun set casting rays on his face. I guess he thought I wasn't really going to do it, because when I began to sprint to the edge his jaw dropped.
I laughed, closed my eyes, and jumped. I felt the cold wind surround my body for a split second before I felt freezing cold water cover me from head to toe.
I felt it quickly flood into my nose, leaving a burn in it as I swam upwards towards the light. I broke the water, taking deep breaths. The cold made it hurt to move, but I managed. I shook my head to one side to move my hair to were I could see. I looked up and saw Craig's whole being hurl towards me from the sky.
I closed my eyes to brace for impact, but was only splashed. He landed beside me, quickly bobbing his head of from the water. His black hair was slicked down on his face in every direction. I couldn't help but burst out laughing looking at his face as he took one hand and moved the hair from his eyes.
He grunted and splashed me, joining in on my laughing. We raced each other back to shore, and Craig managed to beat me to the muddy shore side. We both laid on our backs, propped up with our elbows behind us. We sat their heaving our breath in the cold air.
I looked to Craig. He had taken off his clothes too, only leaving his underwear. He had a toned stomach and smooth looking skin. I attempted to tear my eyes away before the went down farther on his body. I quickly snapped my head to the lake, watching the water.
"Hey Tweek?"
"Yeah?"
"I could live like this, for like, forever."
"..Me t-too..."
I could feel my face flush, and I only hoped he didn't look my way. This was a dream. A love sick daze. It was everything I ever asked for.
-
We trekked our way up, back to the cliffs edge once again. It was starting to get dark, so we packed up and made our way home. Craig walked me home and we said our goodbyes.
I took a shower and hustled myself in bed, the place were I let things sink in. And oh boy, did they sink in.
I saw something in Craig that I saw in no one else. I saw a bright light blossom from inside when I see him smile. I see my past fade away and my future bloom. I feel like my hearts always beating too fast, and as soon as I'm away from him it feels sore.
It was all I ever wanted ever, in one single person. He made me feel safe, and whole. Even in the freezing cold, I feel my chest burning up. It was something. It was like love. I really think, it might be love.
I don't know how much longer I could go on though. He was like my addiction, like a drug almost. I wanted more and more of him. Every time I see him, it's like a fresh dose. The more I see him, the more I want to hang out.
Maybe I should tell him? I don't know what exactly I'd be telling though. I guess I'd tell him how I had a weird feeling in my stomach that started as a like and soon became love. The feeling was everything to me. It was consuming me and I was helpless in stopping it, and that was okay.
I want Craig to know how I feel, even if he doesn't feel the same way. He needs to know that my heart expands when he's around. He needs to know that I need him.