Jade's POV
"I want you out of this. Please jade"
I just looked at her. She looks like begging. I cant speak because deep inside. I dont want. I dont want to leave her. I dont want her with someone else. I dont want to break up with her. Even though it hurts its fine with me. Even though im hurting ill still try to hold.
Because i believe there's no love if there's no pain
I believe that. Its normal to be hurt. Its normal to be jealous. And its normal to have a problems
I dont want to cry. I will not cry
"Why? Why do you want me out of this!" I asked her. I looked her in her eyes. And i hate it when i saw the mercy in her eyes.
"Jade... i love you. And in three years, i saw you how you love me. Youre fighting for it. And it hurts me that i cant do it. Every fight you do it hurts me. I hope im in your situation instead.
"Pez,.. i know you know that i can do everything for your right? I love you that much." I walked closer to her. But everytime i take step forward she steps backward.
"Jade please... im also hurting when i see youre hurt. Please stop this. Everyone thinks your crazy but me, i dont, i know youre not like that. Then prove to them, youre not. Do the right thing jade." She said trying to convince me
"I didnt know that loving you is wrong." I said sadly. "You know from the start that i already owned you. You even told me that!"
"Jade please stop. The time will come that i'll be the one who'll make you happy. I'll be the one who'll fight for you. But for now, you shoulf give yourself a time first" she looked at me trying to say goodbye.
She turned her back and left my room. Its sad to see your love leaving. But the way she said those words want me to throw myself in the building.
I walked to my bed and lay down i want to rest. Am i that stupid?
I closed my eyes and right after i closed them. The tears come flooding from my eyes. She's gone. The fight is over. She ended it. She ended my stupidness. And also ended my happiness.
Goodness! I cant believe after a long time of waiting for her. She just left me. I want to think that this is just a obstacle. But i cant help not to cry
Because the fact was clear. Clear as the water. She's gone. Its done.
I slept with tears in my eyes and still crying when i woke up. This day, something change. There's missing and i dont know if she'll be back.
I have to go to my office. And i need to fix myself.
I stand up and looked infront of the full length mirror in my room.
This is me, Jade Amelia Thirlwall. But am i still me? My heart is gone. Pez steal it. I smile on my reflection.
"Thats not you... you are bitter now. You loved her that much. You already forgot how to smile. Smile in simple things. You forget to appreciate the little things in your life. You cant see the importance in everywhere. Because your mind, your heart, and your life turns upside down on pez's presence. Now.. you should learn to grow. To smile. To laugh to have fun and to love without her. Without perrie.
"This is my last tears. I promise to myself" as i blink and tears fall.
I went to my bathroom and took a shower
I went outside and sigh i tried to smile. I fixed my dress.
My breathing stops when i opened the door of my room. If i dont have any meeting for today i will not get out of my room.
I smiled bitterly when i walked to pez's door. She's not mine anymore. I think this is right. I will give her space. This will end soon. I dont need to fight until forever. Sometimes i need to let my problems get tired of me.
I went to my office. Thirty minuted early. I went all to my meetings. I put all my attentions to my work. I went to the conference room.
They are all complete. This is the annual meeting for this year. She's here.. yeah Pez is here..
I sat to my chair and i started tk tackle the annual update of my department.
She's looking at me and she's staring.. i once met her eyes. But i froze on her cold stares. I didnt dare to looked at her ever again.
The meeting ended without someone asking why im quiet.
But that's what i thought
Because at the end of the meeting the look at me weirdly
"I gotta go... i wont eat lunch" and then i move my gaze away and smile. I went outside
"Jade.." after i left the conference room pez called me. She's following me.
"If you dont have anything important to say.. ill leave now." I said and walked
"Last night... you understant me last night right?" She asked
"Im not that stupid" i said ane continue walking to the elevator
I should fixed myself...
In a blink of an eye... im now a new jade... more beautiful... less problem. But still head over heals inlove with my baby.
Short hair cut minimize my problem.
Free...
Thats what i feel.
I drove my car and i saw the house of my friends i wonder what should i do here.
I went first to the house of leigh.
"Jade.."
" what bought you here??" She asked
"Nothing just trying to show yku how beautiful i am" i laughed while flipping my hair and she raised her eyebrow.."
"Honestly what happened to you two?"
"We talked"
"Then?"
" she decided to broke up with me" i sigh
"I didnt know what to say. Your situation is so hard." She said
I just shrugged my shoulder for an answer. I removed my gazed
It looks like im only the one who's sacrificinf here. Right from the start.. is that the reason why im the only one who's hurting. Why is it so easy for her to let me go.
" jade everything will be alright" she held my hand
I wipe my tears and smile as i see her symphatetic look.
Then i said my goodbye.
I looked at jesy's house and i entered it.
"Boooo" i said and jesy looked at me
"Holy crap bitch i didnt recognized you!"
Then we just talked to each other..
Then the last... i went to my dad and my mom's house. I found him in our balcony sipping coffee..
"Dad.." when i looked at him the tears started to fall into my eyes... i hugged him tightly and i cry.. "Dad. It hurts" i whispered
I feel his magical hand caress my hair, his hand made me feel how he cares on me, how much he loves me and he will never let me down no matter what.
"Its ok babe.. itll gone soon." I whispered he hugged me and kissed my forehead.
Im still not alone my parents are still here. No matter what happen
I went outside my house and bought the hope that this will problem will be gone soon. That sooner the pain will go. I'll move on.
When i went to the hallway of my floor i saw pez. Standing infront of the her door's room. I cant help not to think that she's waiting for me. I want to smile. But she didnt call me or something. She just looked at me until i entered my room and i closed the door i closed my eyes and i realized.....
..... its over.
A/N
Few more chapters to goooooo.