Chapter 8
My uncle sat there peering at me looking at my legs. I couldn't help but feel as if my whole family was perverted.
Me-where's aunty Mariam
Him-she'd be here in an hour
Me-well I have coursework to do" I said before rushing out of the room
Him-EXCUSE ME!" I stopped In my tracks taking in a deep breath knowing what I done was wrong.
I walked back into the living room standing their unsure of what he was going to say.
Him-your dad may be in Egypt but it doesn't mean you lose all respect for adults whilst he's gone
Me-I know I'm sor...
Him-No! You do not know!" I kept quiet standing there fiddling with my fingers. He stood up and walked over to me
Him-does your dad discipline you?
Me-yes uncle
Him-well he's not doing a very good job" he said looking at me as if I was shit on the ground. He then grabbed my face with such grip lifting it into his view. I just looked at him trying my hardest not to look too scared.
Him-why do you have make-up on?" I swallowed my spit searching for a good enough excuse but nothing. I stood there silent only making things worse for myself. This is why I hated my family, they say discipline is very important but their whole life is a Sin.
He then got his thumb and then began smudging all of my eye make-up making some go into my eye. I made a slight noise
Him-Did I say make a noise?" I shook my head keeping my right eye closed
Him-open your eye" I tried but failed
Him-Do not disrespect me! Now open your eye!" I opened it letting the air sting it slightly.
Him-see this is why It is forbidden. Did your dad not tell you that" I nodded
Him-so you disrespect your father. You are a disgrace" he said pushing my head out of his grip.
Him-what is this in your hair" he said grabbing hold pulling my closer. I didn't dare to make a sound.
Him-what is this horrible nonsense
Me-g-gel" he then held my hair tighter using his left hand to strike across my face leaving it sore.
Him-now go wash your hair and your face." He said before sitting down.
I quickly left the room running upstairs to the bathroom. I shut the door and stood their trying my hardest to fight the tears. It hurt so much to know that even my uncle could hit me and think of me as a disgrace.
I do so much to try and make my family happy. I revise 24/7 I do all my coursework before the deadline leaving me more time to revise. I clean I cook and I know for a fact I a good daughter, but what else do they want from me.
My dad has already stolen my innocence and joined with my mum to make me feel unwanted and a burden to the family. Although he may like to put on that loving father act, I know it's only to keep me giving up my nights to him, even though if I did try saying no it wouldn't make a difference.
I sighed blinking my tears away before turning on the shower.
I grabbed my wipes and looked into the mirror. I had a long thick line of dark shaded and light shaded eye liner smudged from my eye down to my lower cheek.
Right now all I could see was someone ugly who was hurt. I leaned forward examining the smack mark closing my eyes not wanting to look any longer.
Me-why me?" I asked casually looking to the ceiling.
Me-what have I done, you can't just punish someone for nothing" I said still looking up. No matter how many times I looked up and asked why? I never got an explanation nor a sign.
I've always thought I was put on this earth to suffer. Which wasn't fair at all. I wouldn't wish this or anything worse on anyone not even my mum because deep down I know there's always a good person under their bad cloak. Well that's what my grandma told me.
She was the nicest most gentlest person put on this earth. Although she knew what was going on and done nothing about it. She always gave me tips on how to move on even though they never worked, it was nice to know she cared enough to try.
I sighed falling onto my knee's not caring the force I was falling at. Pain was something I was use to. I could say I was almost immune.
I grabbed the shower head as I tilted my head over letting my hair touch the bottom of the bath. I moved the shower head over my hair letting the warm water run down my brown hair into the bath.
I was up there for 20 minutes trying to fix myself up. Putting my hair plainly into an effortless pony tail. Making sure there wasn't a trace of make up and put on jeans and a long top.
I walked downstairs feeling ugly and hopeless.
I opened the living room door walking in and sitting down.
Him-that's better
Him-your aunty can not make it so I am off" he said getting up and leaving the room.
Him-if I ever see you looking like a little whore, I will tell your father" I nodded.
Him-goodbye
Me-bye uncle" he then slammed the front door behind him.
I stood there mad. He made me clean everything off just so he could leave straight afterwards. I then banged my fist onto the side table making it wobble.
My phone went off vibrating on the living room floor.
I walked into the room picking it up to see Julians name. No offence he was the last person I wanted to talk to. Right at this moment all guys seemed like evil little cunts.
I busied it sitting down crossing my legs sighing.
I felt my old attitude rushing in, not that I was stopping it. No matter how hard I tried, I could never forget what my life is really like.
My door then knocked. He probably forgot something... Great.
I walked up opening the door and their stood Julian. My stomach dropped as I slammed the door feeling completely embarrassed.
Him-Z?" he asked worried.
I looked an utter state and felt it, I didn't want him seeing me like that.
Him-b what's wrong?" I stayed completely silent.
Him-don't make me kick down the door
Me-please go away" I said quietly
Him-why, whats wrong?
Me-nothing, just come back later okay
Him-nah I'm okay, open the door" I stood there staring at the wall
Him-fine I'll just kick it down
Me-fine.
I then opened the door before I quickly ran up the stairs slamming my door shut and locking it.
I took out my hair band and put my hair into a much more nicer pony tail. I then got out my mascara about to put it on when he then banged the door.
Him-open the door.
Me-no.
Him-I will kick this down, straight I aint playing
Me-okay wait.
I closed my mascara throwing it onto my bed as I began stripping until I was in my underwear. I the grabbed a skirt flinging it on with a deep sea blue vest top.
Him-you have till one yeah 5, 4" I quickly unlocked the door and opened it looking down.
Him-what's wrong" he asked walking into the room. I just ignored him sitting on the bed fiddling with my fingers. He looked at me and sat down grabbing my hand
Him-so are you going to tell me" I shook my head as I tried fighting my emotions.
He them removed his hand from mine and touched my cheek making me flinch.
Him-that's fresh, who just done that?
Me-n-no one
Him-don't lie to me" I stayed quiet
Me-it was me" I said lying. I'd rather him look at me as someone crazy than for him to find out and go after my family only making things worse for me.
Him-your lying to me
Me-I'm not... I swear" he just watched me
Him-ight, look me in the eye
Me-you don't even know me like that!" I said standing up
Him-why you raising your voice
Me-stop forcing me to tell you!! It's non of your business cause if it was you'd already know!" I said slightly shouting
Him-no one said it was my business but..." I felt my through hurt
Me-but, but, but what? If it' non of your business, just leave it.
Him-and let them continue to hit you
Me-I can handle myself
Him-I don't think you can" he said standing up to touch me
Me-look just leave it" I replied pushing his hands away from me.
Him-why you getting mad at me. It's not me hitting you" I screwed him.
Him-I bet your only screaming at me cause your too fucking shook to get that brave to the person who's actually do it
Me-shut up" I said wiping my tear away
Him-what the truth hurts yeah?" I just looked away
Him-look I'm asking cause I care...
Me-well if you cared you stop ask...
Him-but why is it that your standing there protecting the person that's taking their shit out on you?
Me-because it's complicated
Him-it's only complicated if you make it complicated
Me-I' trying to make my life simple. I don't need the whole world knowing
Him-what me and Lauren are the whole world
Me-she's worried trying to change me, make me something else, wanting to tell someone about it. She's there biting her tongue every day trying her hardest not to tell a soul.
Him-well if it's that bad maybe you need to tell someone
Me-and what become some fucking orphan that no one wants...
Him-so it's your parents" he said shaking his head. I shot my eyes straight at the door breaking eye contact.
Me-I've said too much." I turned away sitting at my desk
Him-why are you finding it hard to tell me but you told Lauren just like that
Me-because we are both going through things, mine Is just worse
Her-ight so do you want me to confess something
Me-no" I said turning around
Me-I did say I'll tell you when I'm ready... Just wait" he sighed sitting on the bed
Him-okay, I'll let it go" I smiled weakily
Me-thank you
Him-just know if you need me, I'm here init..." my house phone cut him off.
I pressed my index finger against my mouth indicating for him to shh before answering the phone.
Voice-Z!" my dad's voice filled my ears
-oh dad" I said not even as close as enthusiastic as he was
-how's my little princess
-im okay
-good, did aunt Mariam come over
-yes
-good
-hows the holiday going
-great... Your mother is looking stunning, we are about to go and eat" since when did he still find my mother attractive?
-oh where
-oh I can't remember the name but it's beautiful
-ohh okay well have fun
-of course, so is the house clean, how's school
-school is normal, revising... The usual
-that's my girl" I ignored him. Why did he deserve to be so happy?
-oh yeah before I forget. My friend Raj is coming over later on around 10/11 after work to drop of more money, you know a little treat" I raised an eyebrow
-oh okay, thank you
-no problem" there was then a bunch of rustling and laughs in the back ground.
-well princess Im off, the limo is here" I sighed wishing that would be me in 10 years.
-okay have fun
-we sure will, talk to you later during the week
-okay
-bye princess
-bye." I then hung up sighing
Me-how long you staying for
Him-not sure why
Me-my dad' friend is coming over later at 10 to drop of some money and probably do a house search
Him-alright, I'll leave at 9:30 then" I nodded
Him-come" he said patting next to him
I got up and sat down as he pulled me into his arms.
Him-we shouldn't be arguing this early into the relationship
Me-I know" I said lightly laughing
Him-it's not good man it's only been a week
Me-oh really, it seem like 2 days
Him- I know" he said pecking my cheek.
Him-come we watch a movie
Me-okay" I said getting up to check under my bed
Me-oo ooo do you wanna watch new moon
Him-what so you can sit their eye balling that Mexican looking dude. Nahh forget it" I lightly laughed
Me-okay no twilight." I continued to search
I pulled out another Dvd
Me-aww I love this movie
Him-what
Me-love don't cost a thing
Him-ahh that movies ight still, put it on" I smiled putting it into my dvd player before joining Julian on my bed.
Hours had past and we just talking over the movie
Him-swear down if I could I'd marry her" I kissed my teeth slapping him
Me-well at least she's pretty
Him-nah she's beyond sexy" I rolled my eyes. I stared at him whilst he practically drooled over Christina Millian's body. I couldn't help but laugh.
Him-what don't you like Nick Cannon" I the playfully gagged
Me-I'm more into a trey songz kinda person
Him-you and every other girl in the world
Me-well there's a reason why" he rolled his eyes watching the tv.
He then randomly pulled my face close to his pressing his lips against mine separating them stopping all oxygen getting through. He then sucked my lips before trailing his down to my neck pecking my skin softly each time. He opened his mouth before grabbing hold of some of the skin of my neck and sucking really hard. Although it stung it sent strong pleasurable tingles throughout my body. I sighed wrapping my arms around his neck as he moved sucking another section.
He had at least now given me 4 love bites, I then leaned down lower to kiss him on the lips making sure he couldn't make anymore.
He then randomly started laughing making me join in before he pulled away.
Me-what?
Him-nothing" he said winking
I rolled my eyes resting my head onto his chest
Him-your sexy when you sigh" he said shaking as he laughed. I couldn't help but laugh at his stupidity
Him-kmt had to pull away before I cracked a u know what" I moved away to laugh
Me-your so honest" I said shaking my head still laughing
Him-well you know" he replied smiling
Hours had gone past and he had left leaving me to watch tv alone.
My front door then knocked, it was around 10:20 so I guessed it was My dad's friend.
I rushed down the stairs and opened the door
Me-Raj?
Him-yep" I then moved aside for him to come in.
He had brown skin with shiny black hair, he was obviously Indian but he looked slightly different. Maybe he was mixed with something else. I just shrugged at my thought now concentrating on him.
He smiled wiping his shoes on the mat as I closed the door behind him.
Him-home alone ey
Me-yeah
Him-enjoying it
Me-yeah it's nice to have some freedom" he nodded smiling
Him-your age I never got this" he said walking into the kitchen. He had obviously been here before.
Him-so your names Zahra?
Me-yeah
Him-how old are you then" he asked dishing into his pocket
Me-15" he nodded as an envelope was pulled out. He opened it and handed it over to me
Him-should have about 500 in there
Him- your dad said you can use that for shopping or books. Whatever you decide" I nodded smiling placing it down onto the kitchen table
It went silent as he stood there leaning against the kitchen counter. He walked over touching my necklace
Him-my sister has something like that
Me-oh okay, I got it as a present" Lauren had bought it for me as a random present
Him-okay" he then let go as his hand ran down from my neck to my chest.
I quickly moved away and stared at him.
Him-don't be shy" I stared at him looking in the direction of the draw.
He grabbed me pulling me close to him making our bodies touch.
Me-can you let go of me please" I asked trying to push him off me
Him-lets not act like you haven't done this before" I stared at him as he eyes spelled evil.
I then tried fighting him off me, punching him and slapping him.
He then just pushed me into the kitchen counter.
Him-don't make this longer than it needs to be" a tear then ran down my cheek as my heart fell to the ground.
My dad had set me up.
(I knoww it's not longg.. Sorry!)