Chapter VII
Serenity
We're in the training room again today. With more targets. Except this time we'll be throwing knives instead of shooting guns. The point of this exercise, I think, is to aid us in having good aim. We stand in our usual initiate line, in front of our instructors. Behind them, lies a table supplied with metal knives. They differ from the knives we used in the kitchen back home.
Home. That same ache of the heart that occurs when I think of my parents, is here now. Amity isn't my home anymore. I can never go back to it or my parents...ever. The image of them clapping for me at the Choosing Ceremony is tattooed in my brain. They looked so happy. And just like a real tattoo, that image is never fading into the depths of my subconscious.
A single tear lies on the corner of my eye, but I wipe it away with my thumb. Get a grip, I scold myself. I chose Dauntless for a reason--to be free and live my way. I need to start acting like them. Meaning I can't cry a river whenever my parents or my former home penetrates my mind.
"After tomorrow's fights, stage one will have been completed." Tris begins. "Today, you will perfect your aiming skills by throwing knives at the targets. Grab three knives and watch Four demonstrate the proper technique." Everyone dashes towards the table and takes three knives for themselves, knocking a few to the ground in the process.
The sharp object feels unnatural to my hands. I've only held knives used for cooking. These knives could potentially end a life in a split second. The metal chills my skin, causing me to grip the blade a little harder.
Four turns toward his target, and holds a knife in his right hand with the other two in his left. He inhales and lifts the knife so its level with his waist. He exhales and throws the knife. It hits the center of the target. I internally laugh at the mouth-dropping initiates. He repeats the skill in the same pattern and then it's our turn. Four doesn't remove his knives from the target, because it is an example to us.
"Line up!" Tris tells us.
"Maybe you'll hit the center on your second throw like with the guns." Isaac jokes, with that boyishly handsome grin of his.
"Maybe." I reply, arching my eyebrow.
I hold a knife in my right hand blade up like Four had and focus on the target. I inhale, but forget to exhale resulting in the knife clattering to the ground.
Come on Serenity, you can do this. Holding the second knife the same as the first, I inhale and concentrate on the center of the target. I lift the knife and close my left eye. I exhale this time and the knife sticks to the target, a few inches beneath the center. At least I hit the target. Everyone else seems to have much more difficulty with actually hitting the target then the center. Knives clatter to the floor like raindrops during a fierce storm.
Amy strikes her target a centimeter or two above the center on her 4th attempt. I smile, happy she's progressing well. Tris and Four pace to and fro behind us, observing our throwing technique.
After throwing the last knife, I quickly take them off the board and restart. I repeat the same pattern and the knife sticks to the center this time. I just grin and continue throwing casually but internally, I'm praising my victory.
After pulling all my knives off the board again, I see Kendall and Alex plotting something. They're obviously up to no good. They smirk at Allison who hasn't hit the center yet, but she's pretty close. Kendall holds a knife in her hand and prepares to throw it straight at Allison's head! Alex seems to barely contain her excitement. Oh heck no! I can't let them get away with this.
Kendall pulls back her arm. My heart increases in pace and I'm sprinting toward Allison as fast as my legs will carry me.
"Allison watch out!" I shout, hurling my body on to hers, knocking her onto the ground. Kendall's knife whizzes just above my head as I do so.
Everyone ceases their throwing as our instructors approach us. I see Kendall and Alex really upset. Steam practically floats from their heads. Serves them right.
"Serenity, what happened?" Tris asks in a surprising soft tone. Must be because I'm used to her tough instructor voice.
"Allison almost took a knife to the head because of those two." I reply, pointing at Kendall and Alex.
"You always ruin everything, Serenity! Always trying to keep the peace or whatever! Don't you have any fun?!" Kendall shouts, throwing her arms all over the place whilst approaching me. She reminds me of Lily and Harmony.
I swiftly stand on my feet and say, "I was trying to save a friend's life! I was keeping her head on, not keeping the peace! And how the hell is killing someone fun?" I growl, huffing some hair out of my face. My chest heaves as air circulates throughout my body fast. My left arm stings from my tackle with Allison, but I ignore it for now.
Instead of responding, she crosses her arms and shifts her weight onto her right leg. Yeah, can't say anything back, can you bitch? The room is awkwardly silent as Kendall and I just glare at one another.
Four says, "Serenity, take Allison to the washroom to calm her a bit and you two" --he points at Alex and Kendall-- "come with me."
I offer my hand for Allison to help her up. She accepts it, but doesn't look me in the eyes. As if she only accepted it because it was the noble thing to do. We exit the training room with eyes still burning into our backs. Four leads Kendall and Alex down another hallway.
Allison and I walk for three more minutes before she swivels around to face me, causing me to halt abrubtly. She's taller than me by three centimeters, so I elevate my head a little to look at her.
"Look, I don't need you to accompany me to the bathroom. I'm fine on my own." She states, crossing her arms. Is she for real? I just saved her freaking life!
"First of all, I just saved your life back there and you didn't even thank me. Second, my arm stings from, again saving your life, so I need to run some water on it." I respond, ignoring my harsh tone.
She stares at me a minute longer and reluctantly says, "Fine." before continuing down the hallway.
My eyes roll at her head and I massage my scraped arm.
We enter the bathroom and Allison hops onto the counter near the sink, not meeting my eyes. The running water is the only audible sound in the room. It soothes my irritated skin, healing it. My eyes wander to Allison. Something's bothering her. I know it.
"Hey, what's wrong?" I ask in a soft tone. She probably despises me for saying it that soft. I did yell at her five minutes ago.
"I can't tell you." She replies flatly. Her eyes stay glued on the floor. They remind me of my mother's eyes. Mother. I imagine her brushing my hair in that slow motion that soothes my scalp. Snap out of it Serenity, you can't think about Mom now.
I focus back on Allison's words. If she can't tell me, maybe I can guess.
"Is someone hurting you?" I question, gesturing to the little cuts on her hands. Knife scars. Who would do that to her?
"No, I do that to myself." My eyes widen in horror as I look at the scars again. This poor girl. I immediately feel immense regret for yelling at her. If I hadn't of come here with her, she might have done it again.
"Allison, you have to tell me what's up with you. This"—I point to her arm— "could kill you."
She stares at me with her intense green eyes. They are a medium true green that contain an equal ratio of blue rays and yellow rays in the iris.
"Alright," She sucks in a breath. "Can you keep a secret?"
"Yeah, of course." I say, eager to know the reason why this girl self harms.
"Well, I'm pretty sure you're familiar with the term for people who receive multiple results for their aptitude test?" She leaves her sitting spot and faces me. Allison is Divergent? Two Divergents from Amity? Is this possible?
"You're Divergent?" I reply with the shock evident in my voice. She's just like me.
"Yeah. Please don't tell anyone. I beg you." She pleads, clasping her hands together.
I chuckle, pushing her hands down. "I'm not gonna tell anyone, cause I'm Divergent too." I whisper, making a smile etch into her face.
"Wait, so why do you self harm?" I wonder, the humour evaporating from my words to be replaced with confusion.
"I hate being Divergent. You're a threat to the society and one slip up and they kill you. I figure that if I kill myself, then there's nothing to worry about." Her voice wavers and an ocean of compassion and empathy overwhelms me. All Allison is scared for is her life. I mean, I'm practically terrified for mine, but I would never intentionally kill myself. All she needs is a friend.
"Hey," I say, snapping her out of her daze. "Do yourself a favor and quit hurting yourself."
She's mute for a while. I worry she might lash out at me. But she only says, "Okay. I'll try."
"Good. All you need is another Divergent friend in your life." I grin, before giving her a high-five.
"Now, let's head back before people get suspicious." I suggest, hooking my arm around her shoulders. I think this is the start of a beautiful friendship.
Once in the hallway, I hear people talking and laughing, their voices getting louder. Up ahead, I see two boys and a girl walking down the hallway in front of us. I stop walking. I know them. That laughter, where have I heard it before?
I recognize the douche boy from capture the flag, and release a loud groan. Allison gives me a strange look, but I just shrug it off. The trio glance at us as they pass us and I silently pray the boy won't notice me.
"Hey, wait I know that girl." I curse internally and turn Allison and I around to face them.
"Well if isn't the annoying boy from last night." I say smugly.
"Look, I know we got off on the wrong foot. I'm Marcus and this is Tori and Ryan"—he gestures to the girl and boy—"and you are?" He arches his eyebrow, awaiting my answer. Those eyes, I know them from somewhere.
"Serenity." I reply a beat later. His friends appear bored at our conversation.
"Nice name. So how about you and your friend come zip lining us with us tonight?" He gives me a sly grin that I can't help but laugh at. I gotta say, this douche is pretty cute. But I swear I've seen him before.
"Zip lining? Is that even allowed?" Allison questions, wrinkling her nose.
"Anything is allowed in Dauntless." Tori says matter-of-factly. Hurling knives at someone's back isn't allowed.
"Hm." I ponder over this in my brain for a moment. "We'll be there. Where should we go?" I ask.
"Top of the Hancock building. Or you two can meet us here and we'll lead the way." He offers. Why is he being so nice all of a sudden? He annoyed the hell out of me last night!
"Meet us here then. Let's say eight o'clock? "
"Perfect. We'll be here." He smiles another goofy grin. It's similar to Isaac's.
"See you then." I study his face once more before heading the opposite way down the hallway.
His eyes gleam with amusement. His hair appears wind-swept. "Aw hi there farmer girl, do you enjoy picking berries?" I remember the voice that belonged to the boy from two years ago; the boy who pelted me with berries. That couldn't have been him. But the signs are so clear.
* * *
Knife-throwing resumed once we had returned to the training room. Everyone had successfully striked the target at least twice.
Amy, Kat, Destiny, and Isaac tagged along with Allison and I to go zip lining. I offered them the opportunity since I knew they'd immediately accept. We intentionally walked slower than the others from the dining hall to make our sneak out easier. The midnight blue sky settled in, cloaking the city.
"I think the coast is clear." Kat confirmed, checking our surroundings.
Us five tip-toed towards the washrooms. None of made a single audible sound. You couldn't even hear our breaths.
Surely, the Dauntless-born trio stood in the exact same spot that we conversed at earlier. Marcus leaned his back against the wall. He grinned quite broadly when he laid his soft eyes upon me.
"I'm sure its not a problem that my friends tagged along." I say breezily, despite my rapid heartbeat. Damn, he's so cute.
"No problem. The more, the merrier." He replies. His eyes a mesmerizing deep shade of brown.
"Let's go then, before we get caught." Destiny suggests.
The trio lead the way out of the Dauntless compound and into the Hancock building. It's old and abandoned, but I assume we plan to fix it up later in the future.
Surprisingly, an elevator ascends us to the top floor or the roof I should say. No one speaks as this is happening, but I feel Marcus' s eyes on my neck. He's a creepy fellow. Creepy, but hot.
The lift doors open and I see an abundant number of Dauntless-born plus Kevin and Tyler. They're all cheering as a girl hurtles down the cable feet first in a human-sized sling. My eyes wander up the thick, steel cable that connects at the roof and ends at the ground where a similar number of Dauntless members stand, ready to catch the girl.
"Whoa." Amy breaths, her fixed on the girl who soars down the line, screaming.
"That's amazing." Kat says, with a wide smile upon her face.
The members form a line, some pushing people to obtain a better place. I'm one of the first intiates to jump in the line. Amy, Kat, and Marcus stand behind me and Isaac and Allison are in front of me.
Tori is the next person in the sling. She wriggles in head-first until most of her body is supported by black fabric. A young-looking boy pulls a strap across her back, around her shoulders, and the top of her thighs. He pulls her back and counts down from 5 and shoves her into the night.
Allison gasps as she watches this. It's hard to tell if she's scared or amazed.
The members whoop and pump their fists. None of them seem frightened one bit. It's as if they've done this since they were babies. Which I don't doubt at all.
Five people stand between me and the zip line. Seriously, five people?
Minutes pass by with every rapid beat of my heart. By watching, I realize that it's more fun to zip head-first. Isaac climbs in the sling feet-first and lets out a loud screech as he disappears. Allison gets in head-first and spreads her arms out as the boy prepares her sling. She screams to the top of her lungs as she zips into the night. I'm proud of her.
It's my turn.
My hands shake badly as I climb into my sling. The straps tighten around my midsection and he slides me forward to the edge of the roof. I stare down the buildings cracked windows and bite my lip. I can do this. Sweat gathers in the line of my palms.
Once I'm all secure, the boy grips the sling and says, "Ready, set,g—" Before he finishes the word "go," he releases the sling and my mind empties of all the things that have troubled me. My parents, my lies, my friends, my Divergence, my sister.
Fierce, harsh wind stings my cheeks and tears force their way into my eyes. I spread my arms as if I'm a bird. A bird that has recently left the mother's nest. My wolf tattoo pulses on my bicep. I hurtles towards the ground and a shout of triumph rises within me. I feel weightless, without substance.
I am pure adrenaline. Every vein, every muscle, every cell in my body is palpitating.
I plunge toward the patchy, cracked street. The ground expands and bulges beneath me and I see people on the pavement. I crow with joy, yelling as loud as my lungs will sustain. The members pump their fists and yell back in response. They are my people and I am theirs. I'm officially apart of them now.
I hang about twenty feet in the air and the people below crowd to form a net of limbs to catch me. I have to trust them. I fall hard atop wrist bones and forearms. Palms wrap around my arms and pull me to my feet. Grins and laughter surround me.
"So, what'd you think?" Tori smirks, clapping me on the shoulder. All the members stare at me. Their hair looks just as windswept as mine does.
"When can I go again?" My smile stretches so wide I show teeth. I laugh along with everyone. I think of Amity and their never ending happiness. Every single person wears a smile on their face; everyone is in the same cheery mood. Not here. We're all different and daring. Though, we are one.
I belong here. I have to survive the next stage of initiation or else it's hello factionless.