Walking from detention is like harnessing my ninja skills. My eyes darted around looking for any sign of human populace in the area. No one must know about my detention, for after all, it is kind of lame unless you're in the Breakfast Club. I don't know why real life detention is so boring. The teacher is in the room staring at you, so there's no room to talk and meet the love of your life. Also, there's no weed and awesome music to dance to.
"Oomf!" I bumped into Winston of all people. How many times can I look at a person before going mad?
"How was detention, Hannah?" He smiled, his eyes bright.
"Shh!" I hissed at him, checking to see if anyone heard, slapping a hand over his mouth. He licked my hand and I immediately pulled away. "Ew! You're such a toad!" I wiped my hand on the sleeve of his cardigan.
Winston chuckled. "Whatever. So... how's the article coming?" He held back more laughter.
I rolled my eyes. "Very funny you buttfart, now beat it!" I pushed him aside and headed for my locker. This hallway is vacant of students. I swear the whole school is disgusting. Anna smiled at me from her locker and I ignored her. When does she ever pay me any mind? I mean, we've been locker buddies since forever, and she has never said a word to me. What is happening to my school?
"Hey, Hannah, school is crazy now, hm?" She flipped her golden brown hair over her shoulder, admiring her pink and fuzzy locker.
"Don't you have Chlamydia?" I blurted out.
She frowned and turned away from me. Wow, way to make friends, Hannah, way to make friends. It's not my fault I'm antisocial when it comes to girls.
"Yeah, I do." She gave a bland smile, making me feel horrible. I'm such an ass sometimes.
"Why aren't you in the nurse's office?" It's like my mouth is moving and my brain is not operating to match.
"I've been diagnosed and given antibiotics, all done. What, are you trying to be a doctor?" She snorted.
I blushed. "No, I was just wondering-" I turned to my locker, hiding my face. Jeez, she is so... intimidating.
"If I'm contagious?" She laughed. "Unless you and I are lesbians, then I doubt—"
"Okay, ew!" I put my hands up to cover my ears. "I know how Chlamydia spreads— I'm not stupid!" Now is my chance to either get away from her or start muttering information about planets or something so she'll leave.
She laughed again. "I guess. So... you and Winston, eh?" She elbowed me, playful now.
My eyes widened. Ew! Is everyone coming to the conclusion that Winston and I are together? Oh no! If so, then I have to stop talking to him in public and pronto! "Pfft, Winston and me? Ha, that's funny!" I snorted, mentally punching myself in the face for being such a loser.
"Oh, well, he is kinda hot, actually." She stared off with lust in her eyes.
I gaped. Anna Baker. Popular cheerleader Anna Baker thinks loser journalist Winston Francis is hot? What has the world come to? Something is seriously wrong today. I'm in some Twilight Zone shit. Get me out! Get me out!
"You should talk to him for me?" Anna put a hand on my shoulder.
"You want me to get Winston to go on a date with you?" I don't think she's considered the fact that he's probably never been on a date before.
"Yeah, please?" She clasped her hands together, giving me puppy dog eyes.
I groaned. "What will you do for me?" I crossed my arms.
She shrugged. "What do you want?"
What do I want? Oh, drr, I need to know who it is she slept with so that I can get one step closer to tracing the lines of this disturbing Chlamydia outbreak. "Tell me who you slept with, and I'll get him to go on a date with you." I smiled.
"Deal." She pulled her hand away and I grinned with victory. "But!" My smile fell. "The date has to go well and then I'll tell you after it is over." She squeezed my arm. "I'm so excited." She ran off.
I sighed. What in the hell have I gotten myself into? The world knows damn well that Winston Francis cannot captivate Anna Baker for a whole hour or two. Hell, he wouldn't even last a minute! Okay, be positive, Hannah, only positive thoughts. You're going to have to do whatever it takes to get this information! Winston came whistling down the hall and I grabbed his shirt, pulling him into a corner.
"What the—"
"Listen to me, Winston! How would you like to go on a date with the marvelous Anna Baker?" I grinned at him.
"How about not?" He yanked my hand from his shirt. "Also, I don't appreciate your blatant disrespect for my clothing. This cardigan cost me a lot of money, Hannah, and you are set out to ruin it." He glared at me.
"Why won't you go out with Anna?"
"She's Anna, and last time I checked, she has Chlamydia like the rest of the population of this school. Why would I want to date a girl like that?"
"Well, because if you do she'll tell me who she slept with!" I blurted out all in one breath.
He stared at me and then smiled, leaning casually against the wall. "Ah, should have known. Everything in the world just has to come back to you, doesn't it?"
"No! That is opposite of true!" I snorted. He raised an eyebrow. "Okay, half true." He raised the other eyebrow. "Okay all the way true, but it isn't my fault! Look, help me out just this once, please?"
"What do I get if I help you?" He stepped closer to me and my insides did a somersault. What in the hell is wrong with me today? Winston is not hot, he is not hot, he is so not hot!
"Uh, well, I'll try and be nicer to you, how about that?"
"You couldn't be nice if you tried, Hannah." He laughed.
"Please do this for me! Also, after her disease is cured, you get some nice mighty and experienced vagina." I smiled. He turned beet red and then a little green. "Um, are you okay, Winston?"
"I think I just threw up in my mouth a little," he moaned.
I sighed. "Are you in or what?"
"One date, right?" He narrowed his eyes at me.
"Yes, one date. Now come on!" I grabbed his arm and led him down the hall.
"Where are we going?" he whined. God, men are such babies.
"We need something to give you an advantage for this date. She said it has to go well or the deal is off. Honestly, Winston, you can be boring at times." I led him to my car.
"I'll try not be insulted by this fact." He rolled his eyes and got in the passenger seat. It's so weird seeing him sitting in my Jeep. "Why are you staring at me like that?" He frowned. I jumped and then started the car.
"No reason," I mumbled and then drove to the nearest electronic store. If I can find some sort of communication device then I will be so happy. I walked in and gaped. Whoa, there are all kinds of surveillance cameras and creepy stuff for peeping toms. Should I be scared?
"Hi, can I help you?" The salesman walked up to me, smiling. He's pretty young, in his early twenties with cropped dark hair and his usual uniform.
"Um, yes, actually you can." I smiled back.
"Unfortunately," Winston mumbled. I elbowed him in the stomach. "Ow!" he hissed.
"What can I help you with?" the salesman asked.
"I'm looking for an earpiece and microphone ensemble so I can translate things to someone." I shifted my feet.
"Ah, are you cheating on a test or something, young one?" He chuckled.
"I'll have you know that I am seventeen, thank you, and no, I'm trying to help someone out on a date." I narrowed my eyes at him.
He put his hands up like people do in the movies when someone has a gun. "Alright, follow me. I know just the thing." He led me to a shelf full of microphone earpiece combos. "I'd recommend one of these. Take your pick and then check out at the counter, okay?"
"Got you." I nodded and he left Winston and me alone. I tapped on my chin looking at all the different options. My phone vibrated.
Tell him to meet me at Mimi's Diner at 5 :) –Anna
I flared my nostrils. Shit cakes, I only have but a little bit to buy this contraption and then teach Winston the art of women. The things I do for a good story. I picked one at an average price so that I can be sure that it won't be useless and too expensive to be true. I headed up to the counter. Wow, this is the first time that I have heard Winston be quiet for once in my entire life.
"That was fast." The checkout guy snorted.
"I'm a girl who knows what she wants." I shrugged. He rang it up and I waved goodbye, heading for my car again. "Okay, your date is at five, so let's go." I started the car. Winston didn't say a word. "Are you okay?" I raised an eyebrow, keeping my eyes on the road.
"Yeah, why?" Winston whispered.
"You're a little quiet."
He shrugged. "So what is the spy gear for again?"
"I'm going to make you as macho as possible. She likes assholes, not nice nerdy journalist dudes, you get me?"
"Sure."
"Just repeat what I say, or do what I tell you and all will go well, okay?"
"Why can't I just do it—"
"Because I know you will mess it up! Just trust me, alright?" I parked at Mimi's Diner.
"Whatever." He unsnapped his seatbelt.
"Okay, put this earpiece in." I handed it to him and he put it in his right ear, tousling his hair to cover it up. Wow, I never noticed how nice his hair is. I shook it off and slipped the mic on my shirt and put my ear piece in as well. "Good luck." I smiled.
He rolled his eyes and headed for the diner. Anna smiled at him and I slipped into the diner, taking a seat in a booth by myself that had a very good view of Anna and Winston. They took a seat.
"Thanks for coming, this really means a lot." Anna squeezed Winston's hand.
"Alright, chump; here we go, repeat after me. 'It's no problem, just dinner, right?' Then shrug," I ordered.
"It's no problem, just dinner right?" Winston shrugged.
"Yeah, you're paying too." Anna smiled.
"'Good thing I saved all my ones from the strip club, eh?'" I chuckled.
"Good thing I saved all my ones from the strip club, eh?" he repeated. "What the fuck, Hannah?" he hissed.
"Shh before she catches you!" I snapped at him.
Anna laughed. Wow, what a dumb girl. "You're funny." She winked. The waitress came over and asked what they wanted to drink. Anna ordered water and Winston ordered Dr. Pepper. "So, what is your family like?"
"You can handle this much, right?" I joked.
"There's really not that much to say. My mom and I are pretty close, my dad is cool, and my little sister is a brat. I have a typical family." He smiled, and Anna blushed, looking down at the table for a second.
"My mom died when I was five, I live with my dad and brother. I'll probably be dead by tonight after I talk to my dad about my... situation." She gave a sad smile.
"Nothing a night filled with drinks and me can't fix.'" I smiled.
"Nothing a night filled with drinks and me can't fix." Winston winked.
Anna chuckled. "Why haven't we talked more?"
"'We live on two different aspects of the world, babe.' Chuck her under the chin." This is actually kind of fun. It's like the Sims, only more real.
Winston did as told and Anna grinned like a maniac. The waitress came over and handed them their drinks. She asked what they wanted to order.
"Order whatever you want but add in, 'and a little bite of you' to the waitress," I hissed.
"I'll have a turkey burger combo and a little bite of you." He winked at the waitress and she blushed. Anna rolled her eyes and grabbed Winston's forearm, vying for his attention. That's my girl.
"A salad for you, right, Anna? Give the waitress all of your attention." I smiled.
"A salad for you, right, Anna?" he repeated, flirting with the waitress, winking and licking his lips at her. She gaped at him and I have to admit, Winston has never looked more handsome than he does right now.
"Um, yeah." She pouted, not getting the attention she wanted. The waitress left, practically in a daze. Man I'm good. I patted myself on the back.
"So, Chlamydia isn't contagious if I just merely kiss you, is it?" I said, twirling my hair in my hands. I should make a living off of this. It's quite fun, actually.
"So, Chlamydia isn't contagious if I just merely kiss you, is it?" Winston smiled at her.
Anna turned bright red. "No, no it isn't, why?"
"Just leaving the door open, that's all." I flagged down a waitress. My mouth is a little dry, need water. They ate their food and I let Winston make his own small talk while I enjoyed my water.
"So, you and Hannah are pretty good friends, huh?" Anna asked.
I froze, my fingers on my straw. "Uh, you're on your own, buddy," I whispered.
"I guess you can say that." Winston fiddled with his hands. He better not make an ass out of himself or he's dead meat!
"I mean she's pretty hot." Anna smiled. I don't want to hear! I don't want to hear!
"No, she's not hot." He laughed. I flared my nostrils. Wow, after all I have done for him tonight, he can't even at least pretend that I am hot for my sake? "She is beautiful." He looked Anna in the eyes. My heart stopped.
"Yes, she is, huh?"
Okay, abort! Abort this mission! "Tell her 'this has really been sweet, pumpkin, but I have some studying to do, I'll call you.' Then throw a twenty on the table and two ones." Winston stood up and did as told.
"Oh, yeah, me too, studying. Thanks for going out with me tonight, it means a lot, seriously." Anna molded herself to him, staring at his lips.
"Get as close to her lips as you can without actually kissing her. Then say: Be a good girl and I'll spend more ones on you."
Winston hesitated and then commenced. Anna froze, anticipating the kiss. "Be a good girl and I'll spend more ones on you," he growled, his voice oozing seduction. Anna blinked rapidly, trying to gather air.
"Tap her nose and walk out of the diner. I'll meet you in few, Winston. Mission equals success." I smiled. Winston tapped her on the nose and headed outside. I waited a few moments and then followed him out. "That went well." I chuckled.
"Hannah, what kind of men are you into? Guys actually act like that?" He frowned, scratching his head.
"Kinda, yeah. Do you not watch TV?" I laughed. Sometimes I swear, he can be so off. "Anyways, now she'll be dying to have you, trust me." I patted his arm as my phone vibrated.
Hannah dear, I owe you forever. Winston is just... what can I say? He's perfect. I slept with Cole Harding by the way in case you were wondering. Tell Winston to call me :) –Anna
A huge grin spread across my face. "Winston, I believe that spy gear is now the official way to get vagina." I showed him the text message.
"My God, I'd rather die than act like that again. What was up with the stripper reference?"
I busted out laughing. "I don't know, but she wants the D! After her antibiotics kick in and she's all clear of Chlamydia, she's all yours, buddy." I skipped for my car. He followed after me.
"I'm going to pretend you didn't just say that."
I stopped at my car, my hand frozen on the door handle. "I'm beautiful, huh?" I avoided his gaze. It was silent for so long that I had to look up at him. His eyes are thoughtful and he looks... uncomfortable.
"You already know that, Hannah," he whispered.
I started to say something and then changed my mind. Winston thinks I'm beautiful, my God.
"Do you think if I made T-shirts that said 'Spy gear gets you laid' that people would buy them?" I grinned, changing the subject.
Winston groaned. "Ugh, just take me home." He got in the passenger seat. I laughed and started up the car.