"Ha hua hai .... YEH SAB TUMHARI WAJAH SE HUA HAI!"
(Yes! ....... It's all your fault!)
Her hands lifted to her ears, wanting this very words to vanish in the air, mix in the dust, evaporate like a hot steam but not reach her ears. But it did. It did and it not only reached her ears but gnawed her heart till they were left bleeding in open.
"Jabse tum aaayi ho tabse"
(From the moment you entered my life)
"Tum meri zindagi me aayi hi kyun?"
(Why did you enter my life?)
"Main tumse mila hi kyun... sab kuch kitna accha tha.... And sabse important baat.., Di khush thi.."
(Why did I meet you? .... Everything was perfect ..... and the most important thing ....my sister was happy ..)
"Sab tumhari galati hai khushi, kyunki agar tum nahi aati shyaam asise galati nahi karta..."
(It's all your fault, Khushi .... It's because of you Shyam has done all these.. )
"You are the biggest mistake of my life, Khushi Kumari Gupta! Kash me tumse mila hi na hota ..." (Wish I had never met you!)
"Biggest mistake"
"Biggest mistake"
"Biggest mistake"
"Biggest mistake"
"Biggest mistake"
"Kash me tumse mila hi na hota ..."
(Wish I had never met you!)
"Kash me tumse mila hi na hota ..."
(Wish I had never met you!)
"Kash me tumse mila hi na hota ..."
(Wish I had never met you!)
"Kash me tumse mila hi na hota ..."
(Wish I had never met you!)
"Sab tumhari galati hai khushi"
(It's all your fault, Khushi!)
"Sab tumhari galati hai khushi"
(It's all your fault, Khushi!)
"Sab tumhari galati hai khushi"
(It's all your fault, Khushi!)
He was right! It was her fault! It was her fault to always care about others. She should also have thought only about herself, just like he and his sister think about themselves. It was her mistake to fall for him when all he has ever done is push her and trash her with his sharp jibe. They were always together but were always reminded that they can't work in harmony, still she , like a fool was always running behind him. Clinging to the thin hope that everything will be alright, that she will, somehow, push the Rakshash(monster) back and will live with her Rajkumar(Prince). But yet again she was wrong. After all she did for him, all he has to say is - she was his mistake.
And mistake she was! What should she do to fix this mistake? The pain was killing, crushing her heart with a huge weight and making breathing a difficult task. She wants to repair the mistake, she should do it. She had always worked hard to make everyone happy so that she can get a tiny part of their love in return. But now.. now she has become a nuisance, a living nuisance whose life is of no use. Who has only been a burden on everyone. Why will anyone love a girl who is nothing but a burden, a burden who has marred everyone's life. She is a mistake , just a mistake. Her parents did the mistake of leaving her behind, to just be a burden in everyone's life, even to them whom she loves. What is the use of such life, a life which can't keep her loved ones happy? She should fix this mistake, she should!
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Arnav rushed inside their room, his eyes instantly searching the one for whom his heart was thudding so loudly inside his chest. He looked in the room, but she was not there. He rushed inside the poolside and a relief washed over him as he saw her sitting near the pool, still, not moving a muscle. The guilt overwhelmed him at once making him ashamed of himself. He should have not said that to her, he shouldn't have. Why he always forgets what all she has done for him? She almost gave her life.. Just the image of her lying almost lifeless in his arms sent tremors down his spine. Taking small steps towards her, he knelt behind her, her back facing him. He needs to apologize. He needs to say sorry. 'Sorry', the word held no meaning, atleast not for him. But he knows no other way to express how guilty he is.
"Khushi?" Arnav called softly , but she remained still. He kept his hand on her shoulder. "Khushi...I.... I ...."
"I have destroyed so many lives.... First jiji (my sister), ... her first marriage broke, because of me .... Second too was on the verge of breaking, and again the reason was Khushi Kumari Gupta, the adopted daughter of Shashi Gupta and Garima Gupta ... You married me for six month, and in your life too I was nothing but a nuisance , a person who is not needed in your life, an unwanted person .... Then your Di (your sister).... I ruined her life, too ... it is because of me that a man like Shyam has ruined your Di's life ...... I am sorry ... I am really sorry .... Sorry for everything, Arnav ji .... I am a mistake .... The biggest mistake ...."
Arnav swallowed the lump as he tried to refrain the tear from flowing down. She is not a mistake. How can he even say that to her? How can he? His shaking hand tightened on her shoulder, wishing nothing but to take away the pain that he was feeling in her voice, the pain which was twisting in his heart like a sharp knife.
A small chuckle made his closed eyes to jerk open.
"Now everyone will be happy .... I will pray for their happiness ... because ... because Arnav ji, Amma Babu ji ki kasam(I swear on my Amma and Babu ji...) , humne kabhi kisi ka bura nahi chaha (I have never wished any bad for anyone) .... I am sorry for ruining everyone's life .... Tell them that ... that I am sorry for ruining their life , Arnav ji .... I never wanted that .... I want them to be happy but .... But ... sorry for being the nuisance ...."
An unknown terror tussled inside his chest, suddenly making him gasp for some air. He was terrified, terrified beyond anything. Her tone,....so ...so shallow ..so empty .... Lifeless.... He words .... her words scaring him. Standing up, he stumbled in front of her. Catching her face between his palm, he made her look in his eyes. Dread filled his every vein as he saw those empty eyes.... it was empty... nothing there...... empty..
"Khushi... What are you saying?,,.....what....?"
Khushi smiled, which died on her lips only, not reaching her eyes. Her hand's lifted to rest on his.
"Everyone will be happy now, Arnav ji ... everyone ...No Khushi Kumari Gupta....no problem .... No mistakes .... No heartbreak .... Fine, everything will be fine ....." her eyes were dropping, voice fading ...
Arnav was about to open his mouth, but felt something wet on his hands. His eyes shifted towards his wrist.
"KHUSHI!!" His terrified eyes looked at her. "WHAT THE HELL YOU DID , KHUSHI?!! " He crushed her in his arms and took her bleeding wrist in his hand.
"Paining ...Don't touch ... it...s....pa..ining .... But ...it....it ....will....stop..... it will st...op..soon... everyone will....will....be.....ha...ppy.... now.."
Arnav's wide eyes just stared at her wrist, unable to process anything. He was in shock. Her hand was bleeding ....red.... blood... her words..... her words.. He shook his head at Khushi, his voice gone.
"You....you have not done this.... You.... cannot...Khushi ....you have not ..... "
"No Khushi.... no...Khushi.... only mistake .... Biggest ...mistake... " she rasped.
"NO! NO! Khushi ....NO, DAMN IT!!! You are not any mistake, Khushi. You are not.... You are the most beautiful thing to ever happened to me ..... you .... You are my life...... I cannot breathe without you, Khushi.... YOU KNOW THAT!! YOU KNOW THAT KHUSHI!!"
Khushi smiled as she looked in his eyes. Yes, they are meant for each other. She believed that. But they are not meant to be together. There is only pain, heartbreak, nothing else. They loved each other, but they are not meant to be together. But still she believed they are meant for eachother.
"Don't ..... don't worry , Khushi ....let me take you to the Doctor.... He will make everything alright... don't worry .... Hold on , OK..... hold on........" With his trembling hand he tried to get up, his whole form shaking with fear. But he stopped as he heard her next word.
"I don't want help.... I want everyone to be happy .... Everyone will be happy .."
"NO!! NO YOU IDIOT!!!" Tears blurred his vision. "No one will be happy Khushi..... NOONE... You are the happiness in our life ...don't say that please .. please,...Khushi.." he chocked, begging her for his life. "I love you ,,... I love you, Khushi,... you know that , right? You know I say things I don't mean ..... please ... please maaf kardo (Please forgive..) ... please .....aakhri baar....(last time...)" He wept like never before.
She knows he loves her. He knows she loves him. Eyes. They converse through their eyes and had thus converse things which they had never said aloud. But now she needs to go.... for him ... for her.. for everyone. She can't take more than this, her heart was bleeding , more than any wound, his words had clawed at her heart and now it was bleeding , and this pain will only stop when her heartbeat will stop. And the pain was being unbearable, she needs to stop this pain, stop that and just want to sleep now, sleep without worrying about others' happiness, their life. She needs to go. Everything will be fine now. Everything. She is a mistake, she needs to fix that.... fix that.... and with that one last wish, she closed her eyes......
"KHUSHI!!! KHUSHI!!!! KHUSHI!!!!!!"
No matter how many times he called her, no matter how loud he called her name, her eyes remained close.
I have written this story long back. Many of my readers might have read it. Was listening to this song I had shared with you guys, and got reminded of this story. So after few editing, posted the first part. As the story is already written and I wont be making many chances in it, will post a part daily.
Hope you all like it! Don't forget to vote!