I was clutching his hand for dear life. I left him once and this happened. I'm not leaving him now, not when he needs me the most. As much as it hurts, I'm staying.
Looking up, I started crying harder.
"Fred!"
"Wake up!"
He still has a pulse. They said it could take hours or minutes for his heart to give out.
He still has a pulse, so I'm not giving up hope. He has to wake up. He has to.
We didn't get near enough time together. We didn't get near enough time together without a war looming over us. There just wasn't enough time. And that's not fair. We need more time. Do we not deserve it? What have we done that's so wrong? What did he do to deserve this? I wish it was me in that hospital bed instead of him. He has so much more to live for than I do.
———
Everyone had pulled up a chair, because after a few minutes he was still with us. None of us want to leave, so everyone pulled up a chair.
We've been here for a couple of hours and I still haven't let go of his hand yet. And I don't plan on it.
I've been praying every five minutes for him to wake up.
The room seemed cooler than usual. The air conditioner was rumbling, but no one really noticed.
Fred's hand still feels like him. Smooth, strong. He might not be holding my hand back, but I can tell he's still in there.
I mean, he can't want to leave us, can he? He wants to stay here with us, right? Right?
He has a new niece that he hasn't met yet. He has to want to meet her, right?
He's a fighter. He's a Gryffindor. He's a prankster. He doesn't give up easily. It's just not him to give up.
He has so much to live for. Why did it have to be him? Why did he have to get hurt at all? Is it my fault? I mean, I didn't get to him quick enough. It is my fault. If I had only been quicker and not questioned Mum, I would have made it.
How can his family still tolerate my presence? I'm the reason their son and brother is in this hospital bed. How have they not kicked me out? If I were in their shoes, I would have done so long ago. Maybe they're just stronger than I am.
——
I didn't know I could feel such raw, agonizing pain. This is so much worse than any physical pain; I can't put it into words how much it hurts. How can I capture the way I feel like I can't move without him? How can I capture the way that my chest aches like someone is ripped my heart from my chest, along with my lungs and ribs?
We've been here for hours, which could be a good sign. But it could just be dragging out my pain.
We're up to hour five; we've been here with him for five hours. None of us have moved yet.
I'm still clutching his hand, as I said I would. I haven't stopped praying either.
Healers have been in and out, checking on him and seeing if we need anything. Some were even kind enough to bring us all drinks. Others brought us snacks.
Callie was handed around. Looking at her, I got an idea.
I looked at George and he looked at me. "Fred hasn't gotten to hold his niece. What if we lay her on his chest for a moment?"
George looked between me, Callie, and Fred. After a few moments, he nodded.
I think he thought the same thing I am: maybe she can wake him up.
He took Callie from Bill and gently put her on Fred's chest.
Everyone waited, seemingly on the edge of their seats. I literally was on the edge of my seat. We all watched for any sign of movement, any sign of life.
Callie seemed content where she was. She didn't fuss or cry. She simply laid there and looked up, eyes closing slowly.
Is that supposed to be a sign of some sort? Please, Merlin, let it be a sign!
Just when I was starting to give up hope, I seen something I had been praying to see: his eyelids fluttering.
I never thought I'd see those ocean blue eyes again.
But, there they are, looking straight at me.
He's alive. He's not gone. He's alive and looking at me.
It's a miracle. I repeat, it's a miracle! My prayers worked! Callie saved him! Thank Merlin!
His eyes moved from me to everyone else around him.
Something isn't right. His eyes... the sparkle is gone. It's like....
"W-who are y-you all?" His voice was hoarse, obviously from not being used.
Like he didn't recognize us.