"Goodnight baby" I said to my 3 year old daughter, Aaliyah, as I tuned her into bed and kissed her cheek.
"Night mummy, I love you" she said.
"I love you too" I told her.
I left her room, turning the light off and closing the door so it was only open slightly, and went downstairs to wait up for Niall who will probably come home drunk and late again. For the past week he's been saying he'll be home at 6 but he's only been getting home at like 1am and he'd be drunk. Aaliyah is always asking me where he is when I tuck her in. She's barely seen him .
****
"You're late" I said , my arms folded across my chest, as Niall stumbled into the house, smelling of alcohol.
He shrugged and collapsed on the sofa, slouching.
"It's 1am! You said you'd be home at 5? And you said you'd be sober which you're most definitely not!" I said angrily.
"You're not my mother y/n! You can't tell me what to do! You can't control my life!" He yelled.
"No I'm not but I certainly can tell you that you have a daughter upstairs that had barely seen you this week since you've been getting drunk!" I yelled.
"Oh and I forgot to mention, every single night I have tucked her in and she has asked me the same question, 'where's daddy?' 'Why is he never home?' 'Does he not love me anymore?' And what have I told her! I've lied to her saying you're working!" I shouted.
"Just shut the fuck up y/n!" He yelled angrily.
"Do you actually care? About your little girl?" I asked.
"Of course I fucking care! She's the best thing to ever happen to me as well as you! Why the fuck would you think that I don't love my daughter! I've never loved anyone as much as I love that little girl!" He yelled standing up and facing me.
"Well you certainly don't show it very much" I mumbled.
"What the fuck are you trying to say!" He yelled.
"You have barely spent time with her this past week, Niall, what else do you expect me to think?" I asked.
"What else? I expect you to at least know that I live my daughter! Know that I have a fucking life too which doesn't revolve around you constantly y/n! You're such a bunch sometimes!" He yelled.
He was about to say something else about me but I slapped him, I slapped his cheek.
We went silent. Niall's eyes widened, more from shock rather than pain.
I went wide eyes and put my hand other my mouth.
"Ni- I'm so sorry! I don't know what came over me" I stuttered looking at his check which contained a red handprint.
Niall just shook his head looking at me.
He was about to speak but was interrupted.
"Daddy! Mummy why do you fight! Daddy! Are you okay?" Our daughter asked as she ran to Niall as tears streamed down her face. If Niall and I fight she always cried, we don't fight often but it terrifies her.
Niall picked Aaliyah up .
"Yeah I'm fine baby girl, I..it's nothing to worry about" he whispered glancing at me with glazed eyes.
"Are you and mummy going to break up? Who will I live with?" She asked worried.
"No princess, me and mummy won't break up I love her to much and I know she's really sorry for the fight" he said and glanced at me. I smiled slightly.
"I'm so sorry" I mouthed.
"It's okay" he mouthed back.
I would never ever forgive myself for hurting Niall no matter how many times he says it's fine.