October 2012
Justine
I haven't seen Demi for over two weeks now and I am missing her. She was in Las Vegas with some of her friends and her management decided to fly to Brazil straight from Vegas, because she had two concerts and some promo stuff to do. The weird thing is, that she seemed to avoid contact with me. We texted each other, but it was always me that started with writing, she only replied. There were no phone calls and that was very unusual for her.
At least everything between Megan and I is amazing. She is adorable and we try to spend a lot of our time together. We are not officially together yet. I know that she wants us to be, there were some obvious hints coming from her, but I am not ready yet. I want to get to know her better before I am alright for the next step.
We are on our way to the movie theater to see Pitch Perfect. I am carrying our food, Megan holds our drinks as we enter the cinema hall to get to our seats. The advertisement is starting and Megan lays an arm around my shoulder. I snuggle up against her, kissing her cheek and intertwine our hands.
The movie hasn’t started yet when suddenly someone taps my shoulder from behind. I turn my head and recognize Marissa smiling at me. I haven’t seen her in a while too. That is so exciting, I like this girl! I stand up to hug her just to receive a lot of looks from people around us, because we are both squeaking with pleasure . It seems like she is happy to see me too. “Cool down folks! The movie hasn’t even started yet. Relax and take a sip of your drink!“ I earn even more grumpy looks with that, but I don’t really care. It is just so nice to see Marissa again.
M: “How are you doing? Haven’t heard a lot from you recently!“
J: “I am fine! Really fine. This is my… Well this is Megan! Megan this is Marissa, Demi’s best friend!“ Megan gets up to shake Marissa's hand before she is sitting down again. Megan doesn’t look very pleased with my introduction. But I just need my time to take one step after the other.
M: “Demi is missing you, Justine!”
J: “Really? I don’t believe that. She doesn’t seem to enjoy our conversations a lot recently. They got so superficial and it is… I don’t know, it is different. Is she doing fine? I mean, how is her recovery doing? I miss her too!”
Marissa
God, she has no idea. I can’t believe that. It is so obvious that Demi is head over heels in love with her. She blushes every single time when Justine is saying anything cute. Demi's looks towards her, I mean there are hearts flying out of her eyes and ears. Everyone needs an umbrella to cover oneself, but Justine is extremely blond. Demi acts so nervous when Justine is around, smiling the whole time. Justine is definitely blind.
And I had to promise Demi not to tell her anything. Not a little hint. I want to tie them together or lock them in a room, so that no one is able to escape. There must be something I can do though. Demi and I are on the phone every day. She is still really hurt and sad. She is just so in love with Justine and her heart is broken. The problem is that she is avoiding the problem. She doesn’t really talk a lot about her feelings towards Justine anymore. But I know her good enough that I can read between the lines.
M: “You know what? Why don’t you come over next Saturday evening and we will cook dinner together. I mean Demi, Matt, you and I. Oh and Megan you are invited too!” Urgh, that might be interesting. But I have to invite her too, right? Megan nods super pissed and says in a too sweet voice “Sure, why not. Honey, that would be lovely. Expect us to come.”
Honey? Seriously, they are so far already? Justine's cheeks turn red, she looks embarrassed.
J: “Yeah, sure. We will come! Send me the details, ok?“
Megan
Why in god's name am I so jealous every time I hear the name "Demi"? I haven't met this girl before in my life, but Justine is talking way too much about this chick. I think she already noticed that I am not that happy with that. I am so in love with Justine. After she moved to New York last year I thought she took my heart with her. I felt so lonely, empty and missed this girl like crazy.
She is so important to me, I want to spend my future with her. My feelings for her are pure love and this girl means everything for me. I don't want anyone between us. And this Demi could be one to get there. Now her best friend invited us to an all so funny cooking evening with this girl and my Justine?
- Saturday -
Demi
I couldn't wait to meet Marissa and Matti again. I missed them so much and I was sure that they could cheer me up and distract me from my emotional chaos inside me. When I am busy with work I am kind off ok. But as soon as I want to relax the only thought is Justine. I miss her so much, her gentle touch, her contagious laugh and our conversations. But it is too difficult to talk with her at the moment. And meeting her is just impossible right now.
"Are you fucking crazy, Marissa? You did what? Why are you doing that to me? And this girl is coming with her? I am leaving right now, tell them I am sick or something. I am not ready to see her!" She really invited her and this woman? I grab my purse and stand up, I feel tears building up in my eyes and rush to the door. No way am I staying here. "Have a nice evening!" I say sarcastically and open the door.
Shit, too late!
Justine
I am still a bit angry that Megan didn't come back early enough to get here with me together, I want to knock at the door, when suddenly Demi opens it very energetic. I notice that she isn't that happy to see me, her facial expression is clear enough. Why for god's sake doesn't she want to see me?
"I haven't even knocked at the door! You missed me so much that you've already been waiting here to open me? That is so sweet, because seriously Demi, I missed you too!" I just pull her into a hug and kiss her cheek, trying my best to sound serious. Demi's body is stiff in my arms, it takes a bit until she finally gives in and relaxes in my embrace. I lift her chin to look into her eyes. "Hey stranger!" I say, causing a smile that I've missed so much. A shy "Hi!" is her answer.
I greet Marissa and Matthew and sit down on the couch. "Where is Megan? Doesn’t she make it?" Matt wants to know. J: "She is a bit late, something with work. But I gave her the address, she will arrive when we have finished cooking."
Maybe this is my chance to speak with Demi privately. I need her back. Two weeks ago everything was so wonderful and she hardly looks at me now.
Demi
I decide to enjoy this evening as much as possible. Smelling her perfume, feeling her embrace, seeing her beautiful appearance is just something that lightens up my mood. And at least I have an hour without her whatever she is.
J: "Can I talk with you, like in private? Demi please come with me?" I don't even have time to say no, because Justine has already grabbed my hand and pulls me out on the balcony.
J: "What did I do to you that you stopped liking me, that you don't want to spend time with me? You evade me and I don't know why. Demi I am missing you!"
D: "I don't evade you! It is just because... I am so busy at the moment with a lot of things and ..."
J: "And what? You are always busy but there was at least time for a phone call or a coffee talk. I miss that Demi, I miss you!"
D: "You have a girlfriend now!"
J: "And? I don't get the point! Although she isn't my girlfriend now. We are taking it slowly, dating, spending time with each other, you know! And even though she might be my girlfriend one day, that doesn't stop the way I like you. You are my soulmate, did you forget that?" Soulmate, sure! How could I forget that?
J: "What did you want to tell me the last time we saw each other? It seemed to be so important. You can tell me!" Oh Jesus, am I nervous right now. I breathe out and look at her.
Justine
D: "There is someone I might have fallen in love with!" How cute is she?
J: "Who is the lucky one? Tell me!" Demi stares at me and shakes her head.
D: "It is difficult! I don't know how to tell!"
J: "Is it a girl? Demi that is great, I don't see the problem. Your fans would break twitter down with worldwide trending topics about you finally being in a relationship with a woman! You don't have to be afraid about that. And your family and friends already know too!"
D: "You don't get it, it is complicated. I am not allowed to feel that way. Not because she is a girl, just because I can't risk the relationship we already have. Let's just go back inside!" She turns around but I grab her shoulder and pull her back. Oh my god, that is really bad, how could she fall in love with...
J: "It is a contestant? I understand that you are worried about that, but Demi, just hide it until the season is finished. Afterwards it is no problem!"
D: "How in god's name can you be so blind Justine? I am dying in front of you and you have no idea what you are doing to me! You are the one I love like I never loved anyone before! It is you that makes it impossible for me to breathe, because you took my breath away. You and your beautiful soul, your big heart, your gorgeous smile! I am in love with you! And I wanted to tell you that for so long. But I am too late, you've already found this other girl and she might be the friendliest and perfect woman on this planet. I hate her. Because she stole your heart and she has you. And I am desperate and empty, because Justine, you stupid, blind, perfect and all so wonderful girl, I love you!"
Justine
„I love you!“ Demi said to me and it was like I was falling from the balcony. I had a queasy feeling in my stomach. I felt guilty, nervous, confused and ashamed. All at the same time. I started to shift from one foot to another, my palms got sweaty, I couldn’t look into her eyes right at the moment, because I was not sure what I might discover there. I had no clue, I didn't notice anything. I wasn’t sure what to say. My mind was racing; I felt like crying and just stood there.
“Do you understand Justine? Do you know why I don’t want to talk to you at the moment or even see you? It kills me inside! I want to love you, I want to hold you, call you mine. I want to be yours, I want you to love me and hold me. And I am not allowed to, because you are in love with this girl and she is in love with you! And that is the crappiest feeling ever! It hurts so much, that I feel this pain in every part of my body, even physically!” Her voice sounded so hurt, upset and sad. She was sobbing and I knew that her eyes are filled with tears. But I kept starring at the floor.
“Demi! I had no idea! I am so…!“
„Just stop it, you don’t have to apologize. I know it wouldn’t help me though! I need you, I want to feel you close, I love…!”
She comes a step closer, wants to grab my hand. I cut her off, “Please stop Demi! I… just stop! I … This is so unexpected for me, I don’t know how to react or what to say or what to feel! I .. it is…!” “You don’t feel the same, I knew it, but I couldn’t wait any second longer than to let you know. I can’t pretend that there is only love for you as my friend. It is so much more, and I am so sorry for confusing you!” Her voice cracks at the end, she turns around and walks inside.
I don’t grab her hand this time. I let her go. Tears are streaming down my face, I am sobbing and try to regain my composure.
What the fuck did just happen?
It is finally out! I am so proud of Demi! ;) I hope, you all liked the chapter and will continue reading how Justine might react. I know it is a cliffhanger, but isn't that super thrilling? ;) Sorry, hang in there, I will update soon!
This story is dedicated to ROODYY96. Oh my god, this girl is so cute and funny! And really crazy! But a good crazy! ;) We only have to work on her cursing! That is kinda intense! Haha! I like you girl! :)