THE DOOR SWUNG OPEN, allowing Toryn to greet Samir at the front door with slightly red misty eyes. She sniffled and opened the door wider for him to step inside. As soon as she closed the door, she jogged back up the stairs to her bedroom.
Samir furrowed his eyebrows, but took his shoes off by the door. He then slowly walked up the stairs behind her, thinking that was invitation to come up. They've been texting back and forth for a couple of months and Toryn was finally comfortable enough to let him come to her house. It was a bit of a bold move for her, but she wasn't too unprepared; she had a pocketknife wrapped in tissue under one of her pillows in case she was in danger.
Samir stood by the door, holding a black plastic bag with a medium sized brown paper bag inside. He looked around her room noticing the setup. White walls and bubble gum pink carpet. Toryn didn't strike him as the deep girly girl type. Posters and colorful girly portraits of flowers or families under the sun set were up on her walls.
Toryn plopped down on her bed, going back to the homework she had been doing before Samir rang the bell. He cleared his throat, making Toryn look up at him. "Uh...you okay? Did I come at a wrong time?" He turned back to her open bedroom door, "I can just—"
"No it's okay, I was just watching this talk show earlier and it started getting to me. This guy had a new girlfriend and he was bragging to the audience about abusing her. He was like 'I hit it, oh you should see me, I be hitting it all the time,' I hate his world. Who feels happy about hurting someone?"
Samir pressed his lips into a thin line to try and stifle his laugh, but Toryn still heard him. She looked over at him from on the bed, crossing her arms over herself and narrowing her eyes in disbelief. "Are you serious? You think someone hurting someone their suppose to love is funny?"
Samir couldn't help the little laugh that escaped his lips. "Toryn are you serious?"
Toryn had never been so appalled before. Maybe inviting him over was a bad idea. She clenched her fists and held her head high. "You were really nice the last time but now your not. If you think abuse if funny then we can't hang out...and I think you should leave."
"Toryn, sweetheart. When someone says they hit it, their just referring to sex. The guy meant that he fucks her. Not that he physically harms her. It's just a phrase."
Toryn felt really embarrassed, she immediately looked away and back down at her homework. She was so stupid, maybe she should have looked some stuff up online so she could speak more like the normal teenagers did.
"May I?" Samir asked, pointing inside her room.
Toryn quickly nodded her head and Samir stepped inside.
"Feel free to close my door, I have the air conditioner on. It'll keep the cool air inside." Toryn said.
Samir closed the door and travelled over to her vanity, resting his thin sweater on top. He walked over to her and pulled a brown paper bag of Dunkin' Donuts out. "Do you want a bagel? I have one cinnamon raisin bagel with cream cheese and a plain bagel with cream cheese."
Toryn just looked at the bag then at him, silently fingering her pendant. After a moment Samir slowly brought the bag down to his side then sucked his teeth at himself. He winced, "Sorry, you probably don't eat Dunkin' Donuts, huh? I should have called first and asked what you wanted. I'm always doing stupid shit."
Toryn put her hand out, "Oh no no no, I'm flattered, it's just that I'm surprised you brought something for me is all. That was very nice of you."
Samir smiled, fixing the Nike cap on his head. It matched his all white ensemble. A white wife beater with white sweatpants and his white Vans downstairs. Samir smiled and removed one of her pillows, sitting next to her. Toryn folded her legs so she was sitting Indian style as she dug into the bag and picked out the raisin bagel. She noticed an orange juice and an apple juice and took the orange juice out.
"Are one of these beverages for me?" She gasped.
"For you." Samir whispered with a chuckle.
Toryn squealed and opened the cap, taking a sip. Samir looked at her, now noticing her really baggy sweatpants and big short sleeve t-shirt. The clothes were clearly not her's. Her hair was in a ponytail which seemed to be the only style she ever put her hair in. He watched her playing with that same half heart pendant he always saw her with while she read a paper on her bed. She was mumbling and grumbling things to herself.
"Need some help?" Samir asked, licking his plump lips. He wondered if he kissed her how she would react. He wouldn't dare though, he didn't want to come off creepy and scare her. He just liked teasing her.
Toryn looked at him, her eyes like saucers. "Oh...no I don't think you can help me. I did my History, Math, English and now I'm on the last worksheet," she picked it up, scanning it for the hundredth time. "I've been stuck on this for like an hour. It's homework for my advanced psychology class. It's a critical thinking lesson but like, it's almost impossible to get."
Samir nodded his head, "You in advanced psychology? Okay, look at you. So you wanna be a psychologist?"
"Mm hm," Toryn chirped, "I'm taking my first college course for it by doing this advanced class."
"Word? Aight...so tell me what I'm thinking." Samir said.
Toryn laughed and looked down making her glasses slide off her face. They fell somewhere in her massive pile of school work and she squinted her eyes, trying to find them. Her eyes were so bad she hadn't even spotted them sitting two feet away from her. Samir reached forward and got them, gently placing them back on her face.
Toryn cleared her throat, "Thank you," she looked away, "But I'm not a mind reader, I said I'm a psychologist to be."
Samir twisted his lips to the side. "Mm hm, you know you suck that's why you couldn't figure out what I was thinking."
Toryn laughed.
"Nah I'm playing, I'll ask a better question before I leave."
"Okay," Toryn said. It was quiet again as she returned to her work. She bit her bottom lip, her brain frying in her head. She didn't even have any friends she could call, and Takashi was not in psychology. Plus everyone who was in class with her didn't even understand the paper themselves. Toryn would literally cry if her grade dropped. It was due tomorrow and she was so lost it wasn't even funny.
Samir watched her huff so he moved in closer, getting on the bed fully as he sat next to her. Instead of sitting Indian style like her, he sat against the headboard and let his feet stretch out across the mattress. He took the paper out of Toryn's hand and read it.
Professor Lawrence
Psychology 101
Critical Thinking
Professor: "If your sister is getting beat up in a fight, would you help?"
Student A: "That's my sister, of course, I love her."
Student B: "I love her, that's my sister, of course."
One of these sentences are robotically stated out of the constant practice of society and the other sentence has true reason. Which student shows true reasoning by their words and why.
Samir looked away from the sheet and at Toryn. Toryn sighed, her small bottom lip poking out. The sinister thoughts that invaded his mind took him by surprise. The puppy dog face she was making was driving him crazy on the inside, but he kept his composure.
"Do you see what I mean? He wants us to choose an answer but both people are literally saying the exact same thing. The sentences are just switched around. Same exact words, same amount of words—the sentence just starts different. So how can one of them have a real reason when they both said exactly the same thing? Maybe that's the answer right? Maybe he wants us to think there's an answer but the answer is that there is no answer, because they both answered the same." Toryn said.
"No not really sweetheart," Samir said, handing her paper back. "The correct answer is student B."
Toryn looked at her paper then back at Samir with a confused look on her face.
Samir ran a hand down his face. "Okay, it's like this...peep what's being asked. If your sister gets into a fight would you help. Then the bottom part asks you to figure out which person said what they said because they meant it. And which person said what they said because that's how people are use to talking without realizing it. Well, if you really think about it, the person who has a reason for what they said would be the second person."
Toryn was truly confused, "Yeah but how?"
"Because if someone asks you if you would jump into a fight and you respond by saying yes because I love that person. You gave me a reason. Student A said he would jump in because it's his sister, but that's not really a reason. By saying that it sounds like that person is saying that's the only reason they would help, because their related and he has no choice but to help. But student B let it be known he would help because he loves the person. Yes he also let it be known it was his sister; but he said that afterward. But the first person made it known off the bat, which makes it sound like he's only helping on some he has no other choice type shit, do you get it?"
Toryn was amazed, now that she thought about it, she saw what he meant. In under a minute he had solved an advanced psychology sheet that not even she could. And she was always getting excellent grades in class. The fact that he had smarts made her into him even more. It still nagged her a bit that someone so handsome could be into her. She had to wonder what he wanted.
Toryn began to write down her answer while Samir just stared. He noticed she played with her heart pendant a lot. She had it in her hand since he walked through the door. She had it in one hand while she wrote with the other. He studied her. Her neck was long and slender like her fingers, that were decorated in a fresh coat of yellow nail polish. He looked at her worksheet and let her write in silence as he stared at her neat cursive handwriting.
"Done!" Toryn said after a few minutes. When she showed him the paper it was a half a page response. She began to pack all of her homework up while she hummed to herself.
"You don't get bored by yourself? Living here I mean. Your already so shy and quiet and you have no siblings."
Toryn just shook her head from side to side, "I actually don't live over here. I use to, though. I just brought you over here because I know we wouldn't get caught. I live with my best friend, so I'm okay."
Samir gave her a playful stink face, looking her up and down. "Ya best friend, that kid that was drunk at the party, right? The one that came to walk you home from the bookstore yesterday?"
Toryn had to quickly sweep her mental rolodex to realize what he was talking about. "Yeah, he said he's sorry about that outburst at the party he had. He's not usually like that."
Samir didn't say anything. "Those his clothes?"
Toryn looked down at herself like she had to double check. She didn't even remember she had them on. It was just a habit, it was nothing. It was like causal things to wear in the house so she put them on. He left some things over here from the times he use to sneak through her window at night and sleep over. Samir's eyes must have been really good for him to detect that.
"Yeah..." Toryn shrugged, "there just for me to wear in the house and stuff."
Samir rose both his eyebrows in amusement. Toryn felt like the atmosphere had taken a slight turn. She felt like he was mad for some reason or taken by surprise. He probably thought she was some undercover slut who messed around with her best friend and then tried to play the innocent role to other people. She did fool around with Takashi but they didn't had sex or anything. Toryn could tell Samir was starting to think differently of her.
"So if I give you my clothes to wear in the house would you?" He questioned.
"Umm..." Toryn uttered, her heart beating wildly. This was the first time she wanted Davina to come home and interrupt.
Samir put his hand on her shoulder and winked, showing off his long, curly eyelashes. "I'm playing. You gotta start learning how to snap back at people girl. I should teach you."
Toryn quickly shook her head, "No thank you. I don't like being mean."
Samir looked at her and she looked at him. He just stared, so hard that Toryn felt her heart skip a beat. She should have invited him in a more open space with people around. This wasn't Takashi, they didn't have the kind of relationship where they could just come up with things to say or do and it wouldn't be weird. It seemed like her and Samir were having an awkward moment every three seconds.
"Bathroom break." Toryn suddenly said, getting off the bed.
"Huh?" Samir said.
"No I was saying, I-I'm going to the b-bathroom."
"Yeah, but you're not at school or anything. It's your house so you don't have to say bathroom break. You can just say bathroom." Samir smiled, that had to be the nerdiest shit she's said.
Toryn nodded her head firmly. "Bathroom. Right. Okay." She cleared her throat and quickly scurried off, tripping on something on her way out. Samir shook his head and listened to the bathroom door click shut from across the hall.
He got off the bed and stretched, then put his hands in his pockets. The colors in her room were almost hurting his head. He began whistling as he slowly walked around. She wasn't super neat but her room was clean. He picked up a picture of a very tall and skinny man. He was in the picture by himself. He wondered if that was her father that died in the army. The man did have on an army uniform. He placed it back down and walked off.
Across the room Samir came across one of those multi-colored disco ball lights. She had a bunch of sticky notes posted all over her vanity but he didn't bother to read any. The handwriting was very tiny. Samir looked down, coming across a plain black and white notebook. He remembered her saying she liked to read and write in her spare time. So he picked up her book knowing she would be too shy to let him read her work.
Just as he was about to open the notebook, it was snatched out of his hand with such force, his eyebrows rose in surprise as he immediately looked to see who had took it. Toryn stood in front of him with slightly watery eyes, clutching the notebook to her chest like it was her heart.
"I need you to leave."
Samir was surprised so he stood there with nothing to say.
"Please go, I shouldn't have asked you to come here. It was a mistake. I don't know what I was thinking. This was dumb, I'm dumb, this whole lying to Laura thing is crazy. I'm gonna get into so much trouble. She's gonna ship me away to the institute. And—"
Samir was taken aback by her behavior. He took a step forward with concern laced all over his face. "Toryn I—"
She took a step back, shutting her eyes. "Please go! Please..." Toryn mumbled, feeling the tears stinging her eyes. She didn't know if he saw anything in her notebook and she was embarrassed. If he did, she knew it was over for her.
Samir was dumbfounded, he'd never seen her act like this before. He watched how hard she clutched the book and it secretly made him wonder what was in it. "Toryn if this is about the notebook I didn't see anything, I promise. It was just sitting there so I picked it up."
Toryn's black and white notebook contained more memories than she could ever hold in her head. It's how she remembered certain things. She wrote them down. It's how she remembered Takashi cursing her out at the party months ago...it's how she remembered the way her father died...it's how she remembered his mean friend Tink...how she memorized Samir... and even how she kept in touch with the fact she was a schizophrenic girl with memory loss.
Not even Takashi knew about the book. It was private to her. A lot of things were still missing from it, because her memory was so bad she didn't even always remember to write things down; but there was enough information to keep her functioning on a daily basis. But it was also enough information to push Samir away from her once he discovered how crazy she was.
Samir put his hands up, clearly apologetic. "I'm sorry, I didn't know you would feel some type of way about me reading your stories."
"Yes you did, because you waited until I left the room! You were snooping!"
"Because you're shy. I didn't think you would let me openly read it so I was just trying to see what your writing was like. You told me you like to read and write in your spare time so I was just gonna glance at one of your stories. I'm sorry, Toryn."
Toryn never remembered telling him that, but maybe she did. She walked toward her bed and stuffed the notebook under the pillow. She began to gather all her papers together, to put back in her book bag. The room became silent and Samir was a little confused on what to do. She hadn't told him to leave again, but she wasn't exactly saying anything so he didn't know if she forgave him.
Toryn heard footsteps coming her way. She ignored Samir who sat on the bed. He tried to help her get all her work together but she quickly grabbed her papers out his hand, wiping her eyes. Samir knew she was a really fragile and soft person, but not like this. It was starting to make him wonder if something was wrong with her. And more importantly, he was becoming a little concerned with what may actually be in her book. No one reacted like that over someone reading their work. No one.
He furrowed his eyebrows, "Toryn I'm sorry..."
She didn't say anything. She neatly placed all the papers in her green folder and put it in her back pack. Samir grabbed her wrist before she could walk away causing her to jump a little. She didn't look at him. Instead she focused her attention on her pink carpet, fiddling with her pendant.
"Toryn...what could be so bad that you don't want me to see?" Samir questioned softly. He knew he could easily get the notebook from Toryn if he wanted too, but he would never do that.
Samir even found himself surprised by how he was acting. Not so long ago he had told himself he would never want to be with Toryn. She was just someone to be nice to because no one else was. She was an average looking chick. Skinny. Tall. Shoulder length hair. Average facial features.
But it was her personality that kept pulling him back to her. She was like that song that you heard on the radio for the first time and didn't really like or dislike it...but a couple days later you found yourself looking the song up online and from there, on you continuously listened to it until you somehow knew all the lyrics and had it in your iPod. She was like the show you didn't care for on TV, but somehow never missed an episode. There was nothing exotic or different about her...but her personality was so addictive. Samir couldn't lie, after three months of being around her, he actually liked her.
"You could tell me Toryn...I promise whatever it is, I'll take it lightly."
Toryn slowly looked up from the floor at him. Tears started to cloud her vision and right away she knew she would have to let him go. Maybe him being with her was too good to be true. She thought about actually letting him see the notebook, that way he could see how much of a nutcase she was and trash her to his friends and possibly all over social media.
Toryn bit her bottom lip as the first tear fell. Samir's interest was more then piqued now. Still holding onto her wrist, he gently ran his thumb across her smooth skin. "It's not a story is it..." he asked.
Toryn slowly nodded her head from side to side. Her tears flowed more freely now but she broke out of his hold. She went under her pillow and retrieved the notebook, giving it to him. Samir looked up at her soaking wet face, her brown eyes large and bold in her glasses. He looked at her then at the notebook; the good thing to do would have been decline, seeing how distraught she was, but he was human and he wanted to know what was in it.
He softly took the book and Toryn went across the room. She couldn't be too close for the embarrassment. She went and stood against the wall by her room door, looking at the ground as she began nibbling on her index finger. Samir got a little lightheaded and his head started spinning. He was nervous about what he might see. He honestly thought she had some confession to a murder or something. Like poisoning someone; she seemed like the type of girl that studied that type of stuff. Samir opened up to a random page scanned it.
Today you argued with some girl in English class. You guys argued about ethnicity. You don't remember her name—you never remember anything really. But you know she always wears box braids and she's in your English class. So don't talk to her because she doesn't like you. Trouble said you should stab her, but don't. You'll go to prison.
Samir was confused but he just flicked through a couple of pages.
You met your husband today at a party. You guys had your first date in the hallway of a house. You're not sure if it's his house because you didn't ask. But a girl named Rose...or Daisy, she called you ugly so started crying. You're husband made you feel better. You know it was love at first sight because he gave you tissue. But you saw him naked on the first date so he might think your promiscuous.
Samir raised an eyebrow when he pieced it together. He was the naked boy she had met. He couldn't understand why she was writing like this. Writing to herself as if she wasn't there herself and the things didn't happen to her. And husband? She was calling him her husband when they didn't even know each other at that time. Samir looked up at Toryn but she was rubbing her eyes, looking down at the ground.
He flicked through two pages.
You've been working at Renown for a month now. And you've also been living with miss Laura and Takashi for a month. Laura makes sure you take your medication all the time, that's why you haven't been seeing Trouble lately, so don't be alarmed. Today at work a boy asked you to help him find a book. He said he met you before but you don't remember. He claimed he was the naked boy you saw. You remember seeing a naked guy, but you don't really remember the face so you aren't sure. He kissed your hand and invited you to a party. He told you he wants you to come. This might be the father of your kids.
Samir looked up and the horror was clearly on his face. What the fuck? He said to himself. He would have thought this was a joke and Toryn was trying to creep him out, but the way she reacted to him even picking up her book was no act. Samir went through the book for a couple more seconds.
A lot of the entries were about Takashi and a few pages were even about him. He knew because the events she was describing were things that happened between the two of them; but she kept referring to him as "this boy" as if she didn't remember who he was. When Samir got further into the journal that was when he finally started to see his name and not just the word boy. But all of it was still weird to him.
Samir closed the book and looked up at her, he had so much questions. He narrowed his eyes, "Toryn who's Trouble? Why are you writing to yourself? Why do you keep calling me boy?"
Toryn just looked up at him, but was chewing her bottom lip like a child who didn't have anything to say for being called out on their bad behavior.
Samir sucked in a deep breath and ran his hands over his face. He exhaled and looked at her, rubbing his temples. In a low and much softer voice he asked. "First off, what is this?" He said still holding the book.
"It helps me remember things." She mumbled.
"Things like what? What do you need to remember?"
She looked at him, "I have really bad memory...dementia actually. I can't really remember everything that happens. So I bought a notebook and started to right down anything important, or anything I feel is important."
Samir narrowed his eyes. "Is that why you labeled me so much as boy in this thing at first? Because you couldn't remember me?"
Toryn slowly nodded her head yes. Samir shook his head up and down in understanding. It still didn't justify her calling him her baby father or husband, though. Memory loss didn't make you crazy.
"Toryn you do know that we're not married right?" Samir said looking up at her sternly. He didn't know if this was some innocent fantasy thing and she knew better, or if she was really thinking like this. "You wrote that I'm your husband in here."
Toryn bent her head down, she must have wrote that when she was off her medication. "I'm sorry..."
Samir sighed in relief. He felt a little bad but he had a right to know a little more. He was one of the consistent people in this book of her's. "In here somewhere," he said flipping pages. He desperately tried to find the page but he couldn't. "It said something about Laura made you take medication and that's why you haven't seen Trouble in a while. Who are these people?"
Toryn pushed her glasses up higher on her nose, getting a perfect view of Samir sitting on her bed as he stared back at her. He looked disgusted and weirded out by her. Toryn rubbed her eyes, "Laura is my best friend's mom...she makes sure I take my prescribed medication...I'm schizophrenic...a severe schizophrenic."
Samir was shocked by the news honestly. She didn't seem like the type. Not that a person with a mental illness had a certain look, unless it was Down syndrome. But Toryn just didn't look like she had those issues. Toryn looked away, feeling humiliated once she noticed Samir just staring at her and not saying anything.
After a minute, he pursed his lips and slowly shrugged. "So does that mean your all chill and then you suddenly go crazy?"
"No, that's Bipolar disorder and even then not all Bipolar people are like that. Not all Bipolar people get angry and throw things or wanna fight. Some of them could go from sad to depressed but never get angry." Toryn hated hearing people use the stereotype of people who went from angry to sad as being bipolar. It was a myth and it wasn't true. And even if some did, it was not just people with Bipolar disorder with those traits.
"Okay..." Samir shrugged, "so what happens to you, how do you know your schizophrenic?"
Toryn really didn't want to tell him this, but he was asking for it. And to be honest she sort of missed being lonely. She had no friends other than Takashi, her life wouldn't end if it went back that way. It was cool when she sort of had other company besides him; but maybe it was never meant to last. "There's a lot of traits, I don't have all of them but I do have a lot. I was clinically tested so mines is confirmed. I take antipsychotics and everything."
Samir turned his hand in a circular motion as if he irritated by her and expected her to keep going. "Okay but what does that mean."
Toryn looked at him for only a split second before she looked away again. "Well I'm asocial...I don't have any friends except my one friend, my best friend. That's a trait, social isolation. I also have memory loss, anxiety, I hallucinate and hear voices and sometimes I get depressed. All of those are symptoms."
"Hear voices?" Samir said, taken aback. "You hallucinate?"
"Well I don't think I do, because I feel that it's real, but I've been told the hallucinations and the voices aren't. Trouble...that's her name. I hear and see her. The doctors named her that for me. They said it will help me distinct myself from her. They call her that because every time I do get into trouble they know I'm having an episode because it's something I would not normally do."
Samir looked at her bedroom door, wishing he had kept it open. He really didn't want to deal with any kind of crazy female, but Toryn honestly hadn't came off like that. He wouldn't even have known she ever had schizophrenia because it never showed. She obviously took care of herself. He rubbed a hand over his face. He was indecisive about how he felt.
Abruptly he got up, "I gotta go," he said. Toryn's eyes immediately crowded with tears and her lips trembled. She watched Samir fixing back her bed as if he was trying to be polite.
He heard Toryn sniffle and he looked over his shoulder to see her crying. He shook his head and continued making up her bed. Toryn was heartbroken, she bit her bottom lip to try and stop her crying. She honestly liked Samir's attention and the company he gave her. Maybe it was her disorder that had her like that in the first place. Schizophrenics were known to get excited over everything and take something to heart no matter how big or small. And losing Samir even though they weren't that close was big for her.
Samir walked up to Toryn and slammed the notebook in her chest. The action caused her to rock back on her toes for a split second. She looked up at his unfriendly face, slowly wrapping her hands around the book, holding it close to her chest. "I'm sorry Samir..." she whispered as a tear slipped out her eye. She didn't even know what she was apologizing for, but she was sorry.
Toryn couldn't act like it wasn't weird, though. She couldn't act like she wasn't weird. She had him all in her book labeling him as her husband and stuff like she knew him...she had stories of her doing or wanting to do crazy things because of a voice she was hearing in her head. Who would want to be around that? She was fucking crazy and one day it would get out of control. If she wasn't suffering from it herself she wouldn't even want to be around her.
Toryn tasted sweet cherries when Samir's lips covered her's. She was shocked, the action causing her to look at him. He placed his left hand on her cheek, his eyes closed as he continued to kiss her passionately. Toryn felt her heart flutter at the heat his hand produced as it held her cheek.
Samir's tongue got inside her submissive mouth, easily. She was still holding onto the book in her hands tightly. They were kissing for a while when Samir finally started to pull away. Toryn closed her eyes quickly when she saw his opening, too afraid to look at him. She flinched when she felt him take her glasses off. He put them in his back pocket and lifted both her wrists, making her book fall as he pinned her hands to the wall above her head and resumed kissing her.
Toryn's hormones began to go into overdrive, but it didn't feel as good as when she was with Takashi because she was nervous. The shock of the moment was causing her adrenaline to rush. She didn't know how to take it. Samir bit and tugged on her lips, his kiss was animalistic—raw.
Toryn didn't know who pulled away first, but her hands trembled as she went to push her glasses high on her nose forgetting they weren't there. Samir was breathing heavily, their faces sitting inches apart. "I told you I would ask you a better question before I leave...I don't wanna let you go after learning this about you...why is that? I don't know why, tell me why Toryn."
Toryn searched his eyes, not knowing what to say.
Samir went in to kiss her again but Toryn turned her head to the side, making him pull back with raised eyebrows. He still had her small wrists clutched in his tight grip.
"What do you want from me?" Toryn whispers, her brown eyes darting back and forth across his.
Samir smiled, looking down at her small feet. His eyes then made a slow sweep, coming up her lanky body. Toryn shivered on the inside. His eyes met her's and he raised an eyebrow, amusement written all over his face. "What do I want from you? You have to be more specific, Toryn. I don't really understand that question." He whispered, matching the tone of her voice.
"W-why do you want to hang out with me so much? I'm not really up to your standards."
"Meaning?"
"I'm not a pretty girl. I'm tall, skinny, and weird. I know that about myself...and I like it. Meaning I'm not going to change that for anybody. I'm not going to get contacts and start wearing heels and make my hair straight. I'm going to stay with my glasses, my clothes and do my hair in the same style everyday. I'm ugly and you're not. You look like you would bully me, not like me. You must want something from me."
Samir was shocked that she would be bold enough to say that. He would be shocked at anyone who openly down talked themselves. "You don't think your pretty? You should see—"
"Your self worth and you shouldn't talk down on yourself. I know that, but I'm not. I'm just telling the truth, I'm not delusional. You and I are not in the same caliber and even if I had a chance to change that, I'm telling you wouldn't. I like myself the way I am."
Samir ended up chucking, his chuckle turning into a hard laugh. Toryn clenched her fist up from nervousness. She wished he would move back. Her back was against the wall with literally nowhere to go.
"For the very short time and random moments I've see you around, I don't think I ever brought up your clothes, your glasses or your mannerisms. If it bothered me I wouldn't be talking to you. I'm not your father so I don't care about the clothes you wear. I don't wear glasses so I wouldn't comment on them, because I know you probably wear them that thick because of how strong your prescription is. And I'm not a dick, everyone is different, so I don't care if your weird. To sum it all up...you're different, that's fine. I still want to talk to you, is that okay...Toryn?"
Toryn felt like she couldn't breathe. He was too sexy and his answers were too right. "Can you move back please."
"Why?"
Toryn's eyes widened for a second as she made another weird have gesture to push the glasses higher up on her face that were not there. Her hand shook as she put it back down by her side, "I-I don't know."
"You don't know why you want me to move back?"
She sighed, "You're not really getting it. I mean we're really not into the same things. I like to talk about intelligent things, politics, world topics. And that's not to say you don't know how to talk about those things either. But I just mean we're too different. I like to have deep conversations, and tell people things like liquid nitrogen to the gas expansion ratio is 1:694. Which means liquid nitrogen boils to fill a volume with nitrogen gas at a rapid pace. And a dolphin's brain doesn't have an olfactory system which takes away the ability for them to smell. And that there's so much DNA in the average person's body, it can stretch from the sun to Pluto seventeen times."
Samir opened his mouth but was stuck. He put his hand on the back of his neck but quickly dropped it. "Wow...okay. I mean I won't lie, I'm definitely not into that type of stuff and I won't act like I'm gonna randomly start studying it, but I won't get mad if you tell me stuff like that. Nothing wrong with learning," he finally let her hands go, entwining them instead before his eyes met her's, "right?"
Toryn slowly nodded her head, swallowing the lump in her throat. "I guess," she uttered.
She looked at his thick lips, then up, catching sight of brown eyes. Samir brushed her cheek with his thumb, his voice low and hoarse. "No matter how weird, unpretty or weirdly informational you are...I still like you," Their lips were so close that she could smell the peppermint on his breath.
Toryn let go a breath she didn't even know she was holding against Samir's lips. Their eyes closed and immediately her small heart shaped lips were covered by the plumpness of his once again. After a couple of seconds Samir decided to stop, knowing he wouldn't be able to control himself if they took it too far.
He pulled away. "I think I should take you back now...it's almost three o' clock."
Toryn just slowly nodded her head in approval. She quickly dashed away from him and went to her closet to start putting on the clothes she had on before. When she gathered them, she quickly headed to her bedroom door to change in the bathroom until Samir stopped her.
"It's cool, this is your room. I'll wait for you downstairs."
Toryn bit her bottom lip. "...Umm, about that. Y-You can actually go back home you know. I-I know the way from here. My job is not too far."
Samir just smirked. "You funny, nah I can't let my girlfriend walk back by herself. I'm downstairs, hurry up." He said walking out and closing her room door behind him.