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Brightness. That was all I saw. Am In heaven?
"Oh, thank God! You're awake!" Phil's voice rang in the small, sterile hospital room. Painted bags were under his eyes, his thin, clearly dyed black hair was horrendously scruffy. Nope, not in heaven. I'm stuck in hell with him "How do you feel?"
"Fine," the word was sharp and my tone was venomous. I pushed myself off the hospital bed, feeling incredibly woozy.
"Oh no, no, no. You should stay in bed, sweetie. You went into shock after what happened."
My gaze turned towards him, anger cascading and coursing through my body. "Sweetie?! Did you just call me sweetie?!"
"Well, yes. You are my daughter, Willow."
"AND YOU WERE MY DAD! BUT YOU RAN OFF WITH LITTLE MISS PERKY TITS TO START A NEW AND IMPROVED FAMILY!" Beads of tears welled up in my eyes. "Clearly, we weren't enough for your dream family."
Silence erupted throughout the room. He collapsed onto the couch and put his hands to his eyes. Suddenly, the quiet that once loomed was broke by an eerie moan. "Y-You're right," Phil looked up, lines of tears streaked his face. "You're right t-to say that...I-I was never there for you, even when I was still living in that household." He reached over for a tissue from the nightstand, then started dabbing the snot running from his sharp nose. "You know how you can do anything well until someone says something like 'don't think about the fact that you're doing it!' And then, that's all you can think about...That's what happened, I guess. I realized how much you looked up to me. How much responsibility laid on my shoulders. How much you needed me..."
"And so you ran off like that?! That's your excuse?!"
"No!" He screamed, hoarsely, the tone of his voice terrified me to the bone. "I realized all those things and just like that saying, I kept slipping up and that slip-up was Flora. It started off as a one night stand but it was like a drug. I got addicted, I kept coming back more and more. When your Mother said she was pregnant again with your sister, I started spiraling down a hole which lasted a couple of years. I debated on which life to live because I've made two." Phil inhaled sharply, causing more tears to come. "Then I left because I was confused. It didn't help that Stella looked up to me so much."
"Well, you were her Dad," I uttered, the words slick on my tongue.
"Don't get me wrong, I love Flora and Ozzie but I also love you guys."
"Well, now your decision is easier. There's less of us, more of the perfect, plastic family. Pick them." I said with my arms crossed. Ignoring the Phils orders, I padded towards the door, hoping to see Daniel.
"But the thing is, Willow, I want you back in my life," he whispered through muffled sniffles. "I really am sorry for being the downfall of this family-"
"My family. You chose to leave it, Phil!"
"YOU WILL ALWAYS BE MY DAUGHTER, WILLOW! I NEVER STOPPED THINKING ABOUT YOU GUYS!"
"Then why didn't you call us?! Visit?! Write?!"
"Because then it'd lead to the situation we're in right now! Screaming, tears, frustration! You guys are Angels without wings, you shouldn't have to put up with that kind of shit."
I threw my hands into the air, "that's the real world, Phil! You let it come right through the front door when you left. Just accept it. You made a choice." I started to turn towards the door when he murmured something inaudible. "What?"
"All I want is your forgiveness, Willow. Your trust. All I want is my baby girl."
"Forgiveness takes time and besides, I'm all grown up now."And with that, I left him in tears.
The room Daniel happened to be in was right across the hall-room 107. I moved to the entrance slowly, everything still felt incredibly woozy. It clicked open to reveal Dan on a pristine bed and his Father watching over him.
His attention swiveled to me. "You," he growled, baring his teeth; anger washed over his expression. "You did this to him!"
"No Sir, I didn't shoot your son," I said, shaking my head.
His Father stormed forwards, his face just inches from mine. Not bothering to keep his voice down, he yelled, "if it weren't for you, my idiotic son wouldn't have run off with you. He wouldn't have gotten his car beaten up, crossed the border illegally, and nearly died!"
I'm sick of this, I'm sick of people telling me what is and isn't my fault. I'm sick of the volume of their voices escalating as they talk to me. I'm sick of this god damn life.
"ME?!" I yelled at the top of my raw lungs. "Your son decided to jump head first into the water all because you keep him on such a tight leash! All he wanted-"
"DON'T TELL ME WHAT MY SON WANTS! YOU ARENT HIM!"
"Neither are you, asshole!"
His volume lowered and his brow furrowed, causing wrinkles to crease his forehead. "What did you say, Miss?"
"You sir, are an asshole. Not like my Step-Father though. No, you are a snotty ass who thinks they've got the whole damn world on a string and think they can make the people on that world to dance to whatever tune. You think success is some drink in a can you can easily sip out of and continuously buy but you can't! Your son has been trying to give you the whole damn world but he can't! Because you already have it, so now whatever you picture will never be enough. And that's why he has moved on because he is tired of trying to please you."
"So instead, he's trying to please you," he muttered, disgust in his bitter tone.
"I'm his friend, not some royalty! He doesn't have to please me, unlike you! You're-"
"Shut up, you whore!" A sharp sting prickled my cheek. "Now, get-"
Suddenly, a scream of pure agony pierced the thick, tense air. Daniel, who was now awake, was ripping his stitches open and drawing them wider. Blood soaked through the bandages, the sheets, and his hospital gown.
"What in God's name are you doing, boy?!" His Father yelled.
"I'm going to get help!" I said, my voice filled with panic.
"No!" Faster than I thought, Dan padded towards the door and blocked it. "For once in my damn life, you're listening to my words, you old man!" He pointed his finger at his dad, whose brow furrowed even more.
"God damn it, Daniel! You're going to bleed out!"
"No, you listen to me! Or I'll..." He racked his brain for words but instead, he plunged his fingers into the wound that carved his stomach. A cry of pain came from his throat.
"Dan, you're an idiot!"
"For once, she's right!" I glared at him but then my attention back to Dan.
"But you've got it wrong!" He put his hand over the seeping gash and the other through his disheveled brown hair. "Now, you are both listening to me! I am tired of bottling up my emotions! It just leads to shitty outcomes!" He inhaled sharply, clearly trying to conceal the pain. "Dad, you've dictated most of my life. You've held expectations taller than I'll ever be. Do you know what it's like to do your very best and have someone tell you to do better or to stop slacking off?" Tears welled up in his eyes. "It kills, Dad."
"You're exaggerating, son."
Determination flared on Dan's face. Without hesitation, he scraped the scar to be even longer. A horrified expression crossed his Father's face. "God damn it, Dad! This is my moment to show you what I really am and I'm not going to let you ruin it!" The harshness of his volume dialed down, "I'm not going to let you ruin our last moment together." Confused looks came onto our faces. "Dad, I'm sick of every hurdle you've made me jump for they're too high! And I'm not that great a hurdler! I'm a sprinter...You would know that if you came to my track meets... But that's letting the metaphor come to life and it's also beyond the point. My actual point is, I'm tired of you holding onto a leash that acts like a noose That's why this is goodbye."
"You're not going to kill yourself, are you?! You can't put me through that, Dan!" I yelled, tears welling up in my eyes.
His Father bared his teeth, "suicide is for the weak. I thought I raised you to be stronger."
This time, Daniel swung his fist towards his own gut; scarlet blood coated his knuckles. With a wheeze, he uttered, "I'm not going to kill myself...And how dare you talk about it like that! But once again, that's beyond the point." He paused to inhale air that was probably thinning by the second. I want you out of my life until you learn that it is my life. I am going to be finishing up my first year of college! That clearly means I am an adult! I don't need your bullshit that is criticism that only brings me down!"
His father looked him up and down in disgust. "So you're going to chase after this maniac of a slut?"
Anger burned across Daniel's face. The shriek of pure agony once again erupted from his mouth as he pulled the wound two inches wider; blood dripped to the white hospital floor.
"Dan, I'm going to get a doctor! You're going to bleed out!"
"NO! I need to say what I've been keeping in all these years first!" He looked at me, clearly about to pass out. "Willow, you've been my best friend all my life. And...I love you...And I...I..." His words were slowly slurring to a stop. "I get that you don't love me back...But I can't stop my feelings towards you. Now, I don't want what I'm saying to affect our friendship..." Daniel's eyelids shuttered slowly, up and down, its pace decreasing faster and faster. "I just want to do it..." His words were strung together loosely, they were barely heard and weakly put together. "One last time...Even though I know you'll never like me back." Without warning, he slammed his lips against mine, wrapping his arms tiredly around me. Blood absorbed into my hospital gown. Dan looked at me, his body swaying while doing so; in the meekest voice, he said, "even if you don't love me, I still want to be by your side. Forever and always..." His body went limp, falling into my arms.
Daniel's Father cried out, "Nurse! Doctor! Someone!" He was clearly in shock, for his feet stayed glued to the floor but a terrified look was frozen on his face.
The door swung open, several medical attendants rushed in. Voices mixed together and everything around me started feeling serene.
"Stay with me, Daniel," I whispered. "Like you said, you're my reason to stay...to live..." A tear slinked down my freckled cheek. "You're my only reason."