Masakit. Yan ang unang salita na pumasok sa ulo ni Mingyu. Parang naparalisa siya sa sobrang sakit ng buong katawan. It was like something's choking him. Para rin siyang nabugbog ng isang grupo ng yakuza, he couldn't move his body, masyado siyang nanghihina.
Nakakarinig siya ng maraming ingay pero hindi claro ang mga ito. Tunog ng ambulansya, tunog ng mga boses ng tao na nakapaligid sa kanya, tunog ng mga yapak ng nagbubuhat sa kanya, at tunog ng sarili niyang paghinga at ang pagtibok ng puso niyang nagsisilbing basehan na buhay pa siya. He slowly closed his eyes as he felt himself drifting into a deep sleep. He smiled despite the pain, ngumiti siya sa kabila ng lahat ng kaguluhang nangyayari sa paligid niya na hindi niya alam kung ano. Ngumiti siya na para bang ito na ang huling pagkakataon.
He dreamt of something. Ito ba yung nagfaflashback lahat bago ka mamatay? He asked himself, laughing sarcastically inside. Everything was black though, he was only hearing voices.
"You're hired." Yeah...that was when he became a note-taker. Kahit na boses lang at two words lang ang sinabi nito, alam na alam niyang si Wonu iyon. And then he internally giggled when he remembered how he has mistaken it for another word. Pfft.
"Kim Mingyu, gumising ka, kilala mo ba ako? Hey!" A woman said this time. Parang kilala ko 'to ah...Somi? He guessed. The woman was followed by another one."Kim Mingyu...h-hindi mo ba ako maalala?" It was a man this time."Gyu..." His voice echoed in his head and he felt his arms being held. Sino 'to? Bakit-
Then an image formed. He was lying in a hospital bed, his eyes were closed. "Hoy Nog, huwag mo naman akong kalimutan! Kaming lahat! Yung promise ko, nakalimutan mo na ba?" Niyuyugyog siya nito pero hindi siya nagigising.
So weird, that he thought it was real and he woke up. He opened his eyes, panting. Basa ang likod, sinusubukang alalahanin ang lahat kahit hindi niya kaya. Yung huli lang ang natatandaan niya. Na nasa ospital siya at nakahiga, just like now.
Pagkamulat niya ng mata niya e naramdaman niya kaagad ang sakit ng ulo niya. Kinapa niya ang pader para mahanap ang emergency button, napindot naman niya ito pero natumba siya mula sa kinaroroonan. The next thing he knew was he's on the ground.
He hit his head hard on the floor. Naramdaman niya ang pag agos ng dugo niya mula sa ulo papunta sa lapag, binabasa nito ang buhok niya. Sa kawalan ng lakas e hindi siya makakilos. That time he couldn't hear anything but a long loud beep sound, just like in the movies. He was slowly losing his consciousness when a nurse and a doctor came in, shouting out loud and their faces were in a panic. Everything was in slow motion.
Para siyang nasa ilalim ng tubig habang nakikinig sa kanila. Konti nalang e pipikit na siya, pero nagising siyang muli nang namalayan niya na sinasampal-sampal na siya ng nurse para hindi makatulog. Unti-unting luminaw rin ang kanyang pandinig."...ir...SIR! HUWAG KAYONG PIPIKIT!" she said in a loud voice. Saktong dumating ang iba pang nurse para iakyat siyang muli sa higaan at dalhin sa ER ng ospital dahil sa walang tigil na pagdugo ng ulo niya. Habang nasa daan e tinatanong siya ng nurse kanina. "Sir, may naaalala po ba kayo? Relatives? Mga mahal mo sa buhay? Yung aksidente?" Sunod-sunod na tanong niya.
Dahil sa panghihina, nung una e hindi lumabas ang boses niya. It was cracking. Ilang araw na ba ako dito? "J-Jeon...Wonwoo, Kim T-Taehyung...." he answered the nurse with dead eyes and hoarse voice. "Si Eomma, si Kookie.. n-nasan siya...sila?" Nagpanic siya bigla. Hinawakan niya ang kamay ng isang nurse doon na nagtutulak ng higaan niya, tinatanong kung nasan ba sila. "Sir, wala po kaming alam jan. Pero papunta na po ang mga kamag-anak niyo dito... sila po ang magsasabi sa inyo." He heard a nurse said before entering the ER and losing his consciousness again.
Nanaginip uli siya. It's his memories from the accident and from the previous days before that.
Hinahabol niya ang aso niya na hindi naman niya alam kung saan papunta. Ilang beses siyang nabangga sa kung ano-ano pero patuloy siya sa pagtakbo sa takot na mawala ang alaga niya, hingal man ay nagpatuloy siya.
Sa kalagitnaan ay napatigil siya sa paghahabol, nawala na kasi ang naririnig niyang mga tahol mula dito. Anong gagawin ko? Pag-iisip niya, pero bago pa siya makahakbang muli e nakarinig siya ng busina mula sa isang papalapit na sasakyan, saka niya naramdaman ang matinding pananakit sa buong katawan niya.
And boom, it was black again.
He was hurt badly in that accident. Nabali ang kamay niya at ang paa niya. Aside from that, he received treatment for his fatal injury in the head. Tumama ito ng napakalakas sa isang matigas na bagay. Probably a post or something like that.
He also remembered someone talking while he was asleep. "He may suffer from amnesia. Temporary man o permanent, walang nakakaalam...kapag gumising siya saka lang natin malalaman-" iyan lang ang mga linyang natatandaan niya dahil muli, nawalan siya ng malay.
And now, he is awake again.
Malamig kahit maaraw, mag aalas syete palang ng umaga. Puros puti ang kwarto maliban sa mga halaman, at damit niyang kulay asul. Hindi niya napigilan ang paghawak sa nananakit niyang ulo. Tinahi ba nila 'to? Ang sakit hah! He complained in his head, to weak to say it.
Pinilit niyang paupuin ang sarili. Nag-iisa siya sa kwarto, walang kausap, maski ang pamilya niya e wala. But then, the door creaked and opened, revealing his mother in her pajamas, her brother in his sleep wear and a random kid who looks the same as Taehyung.
"Mingyu!" His mother and brother said in unison, running to him and embracing him with such strong arms. It was the first time he felt such warmth, parang napakatagal siyang nasa gitna ng isang bagyo. He responded by embracing them back. "Eomma, hyung...kala ko hindi niyo ako pupuntahan eh..." as soon as he finished uttering those words, he burst out into tears, like a woman, grasping his mother and brother's shirt as tight as he can, not letting go and thinking they would disappear if he does.
"Yah! Bakit mo pa kasi yun ginawa! Dapat umuwi ka nalang sa bahay okaya tinawagan mo kami," Saway ng kuya niya na parang bata na umiiyak at nagpupunas ng luha gamit ang braso. "Walang hiya ka talagang bata ka....pinagalala mo kami ng kuya mo at mga kaibigan mo..." his mother said, sniffing. "..buti naman at may naaalala ka. Sabi ng doctor mo baka magkaamnesia ka pa- TEKA KILALA MO NAMAN AKO DIBA? KAMI NG KUYA MO." she cried, letting go of the hug and covering her red face. Mingyu held his mothers hand and put it across his cheeks after kissing her knuckles. "Don't worry 'ma. Sa pagsesermon mo palang, alam ko nang ikaw yan." Pagbibiro niya kahit na namumutla ito at tuyong tuyo ang mga labi.
Nagsimula ang kamustahan doon pero naputol kaagad nang sumingit yung bata sa gilid ni Taehyung.
"Omo," muttered the silent kid. Napatingin sa kanya ang lahat. His mother looked elsewhere and his brother rubbed the back of his head, along with the awkward silence, Mingyu assumed it only means they have something to tell him. Agad na nagtaka si Mingyu kung ano ito. "Sino yang bata hyung? Anak mo?" Mingyu asked at the same time, guessed.
"Pfft-" pinigilang tumawa ni Taehyung, may binulong ito sa nanay niya. His mother's face says how much worried she was, agad nitong pinalo si Taehyung sa kamay para sawayin. Pero bakit? Mingyu asked himself. "Yah! Tinatanong ko kung anak mo yan, atsaka ano bang nangyari? May tinatago ba kayo ah!" Mingyu was confused as fuck, bakit kasi ganon? Ilang araw lang siyang walang malay tapos makikita niya ang kuya niya na may dalang bata? HINDI KO MATANGGAP NA HINDI AKO NAKAABAY SA KASAL! He said at the back of his mind, still clueless of the obvious.
Natahimik ang nanay at kapatid ni Mingyu, nagtitinginan lang silang dalawa kaya naman nagtaka na talaga si Mingyu sa katahimikan. "May problema ba? Huwag niyong sabihin na kapatid natin yan, hyung! NAG ASAWA BA ULI SI EOMMA??! SHOX!" sigaw nito, na parang walang iniindang sakit ng ulo at normal na uli ang lagay.
Natawa naman kaagad ang bata at mag-ina. "IKAW NA BATA KA HINDI KA NA NAGBAGO," his mother exclaimed. "GYU NAMAN, TEKA EPEKTO BA YAN NG BAGOK NG ULO MO? MAS NAGING TANGA KA? HAHAHAHAHA PAREHO NA TAYO PRE, KAPATID NGA KITA HAHAHAHAHAHAHA." His brother was holding his tummy, struggling to breathe. Loko talaga 'to. Agad itong sinaway ng nanay niya, "Shh! May bata, salita mo!"
"Lol, sarreh."
"Aish! Uy sabihin niyo na kasi, aba!" Reklamo ni Mingyu habang padabog na kinakalampag ang mga paa sa kama. "Tsk. Kakausapin ko muna ang doctor mo Gyu, mamaya na ako babalik. Natawagan ko na mga kaibigan mo, sabi nila papunta na sila." His mother said as she opened the door. "Tara muna dito," she gestured to the kid before leaving the room, the kid obeyed her.
Natira sa loob ang kuya niya at siya. Hindi na siya nagdalawang isip na magtanong kasi kanina pa talaga siya gulong-gulo. "Hyung, ano bang nangyari? Sagutin mo ako ng matino..." He pleaded and he meant it. Tiningnan siya ng kuya niya, he saw how pathetic Mingyu was so he thought he must really answer seriously. Plano ko pa naman sanang lokohin siya, tsk.
Napabuntong hininga nalang ito, wala na siyang choice kundi magsalita, Mingyu smirked. Huminga ito ng malalim bago magsalita ng tuluyan. "Aish, naaksidente ka dahil sa-"
"Alam ko na yung sa aksidente, yung after nun nalang ikwento mo." Sabat niya. "Wow demanding. Sige. So yun, after nun sinugod ka dito malamang, tapos malala injuries mo. Napilayan ka rin. Ang dami naming binayaran. Halos hindi na ako natutulog dahil sa katatrabaho pati si mama laging OT sa-"
"Hyung naman e!" Mingyu stopped him, crossing his arms to his chest. "....... ang sama tuloy sa feeling. Ang laking pabigat ko na naman-" he pouted.
"Oo na kung yan ang iniisip mo, buti nga sayo." Pabiro nitong sabi, pero biglang sumimangot si Mingyu kaya naman binawi niya ito kaagad. "Char lang hahaha, so ayun na nga. Sinabi pa ng doctor na kung hindi ka magigisng in 48 hours, magcocoma ka. Tapos nacoma ka nga. Tatlong taon na simula nung aksidente. Yun lang," He explained. Tila ba tumigil ang mundo ni Mingyu sa narinig, his jaw almost dropped on the floor because of surprise. He even touched and pressed his legs and arms. " Kaya pala hindi na ako pilay..." hindi na masakit yung paa at kamay ko... he thought. He stretched his body to see if anywhere hurts. "Ah-" Pero ulo ko naman at likod ang masakit....three years ka ba namang mahiga, aba. He massaged his back.
"Mukhang hindi mo pa narerecover lahat ng memories mo kaya naman sinabi ko kay Eomma na kausapin niya ang doktor. So okay ka na ba?" Tanong niya dito habang nagbabalat ng mansanas na dala niya kanina, "nakapajamas pa ako, sobrang nagmadali kami ni mama nung tumawag sila at sinabing mabubuhay ka pa- este magigising ka na daw in any minute hehe," he laughed awkwardly. "Pasaway ka talaga, kakagising mo lang gusto mo na namang matulog ulit, gusto mo patulugin kita ng tuluyan eh!" His hyung nagged at him. Hindi man halata pero mahal na mahal niya ang kapatid. "Dapat hindi mo pinilit ang sarili mong gumalaw! Edi sana walang panibagong injury jan sa ulo mo, kala namin makakausap ka na namin pero bumalik ka sa pagpikit mo," he sounded so disappointed that Mingyu felt even more bad. Pero dapat hindi ipakita.
"Dami mong sinabi hyung. Okay lang ako! Nakakaalala naman ako pero oo mukhang hindi pa lahat..." he pouted. "So kamusta yung school? Magagaling ba mga bagong estudyante mo?" Mingyu asked casually as he munched a bite of an apple.
"Uhh..." his hyung paused. "...oo. Okay naman ako sa trabaho. Kaso mahigpit na yung bagong boss namin." Taehyung answered.
"Eh si Kookie? Nakita niyo ba siya? Nasaan siya bakit hindi niyo siya sinama?" Tanong ni Mingyu, kaagad na nagbago ang ekspresyon nito kaya nagulat si Taehyung. "Grabe mukhang mas concerned ka talaga kay Kookie kaysa samin ni eomma ah!? Pero oo, nakabalik siya atsaka hindi namin nasama kasi binabantayan niya bahay natin hehe." Taehyung muttered.
"Oh," he now understands. Kahit sabik na sabik pa siyang makita ang aso niya e wala siyang magagawa sa kasalukuyan. "Sa susunod isama niyo si Kookie dito para naman-" before he could finish, he was cut by some intruder who opened the door like he was being chased by zombies. Hingal na hingal ito at rinig na rinig rin ni Mingyu ang paghinga niya. Parehong napatingin ang magkapatid sa kanya.
"Na...una...ako....Kim...Mingyu...." sabi nito habang naghahabol pa rin ng hininga. Nakahawak ito sa pinto at konti nalang e parang tutumba na at bibigay na ang mga paa. Mingyu was worried. Sino 'to? He furrowed his eyebrows. This annoying voice....kanino ito?
Narinig niyang huminga ng malalim ang lalaki sa pinto sabay sumigaw ng napakalakas sa labas ng pinto. "KIM MINGYU IS AWAKEN! HURRY GUYS! RAN LIKE SEOKMIN! TRUCK AND PILL! DALI!!! KUNWARI MAY TSUNAMI!"
Natawa nalang sina Taehyung. Alam ko na kung sino 'to. Gyu grinned at the thought. Isa lang naman ang kaibigan niyang maka-english ng ganito. No other than Seungkwan. Tumakbo ito patungo sa kanya at niyakap siya ng napakahigpit, Seungkwan burried Mingyu's face on his fluffy tummy, suffocating him. "GREEN LIGHT BEBE KO, NAKALIMUTAN MO NA BA RULES SA ROAD, HAH!! KILALA MO BA AKO??!? KINALIMUTAN MO BA ANG PINAKAMAGANDA MONG KAIBIGAN-"
"HEP, MAY NARINIG AKONG KASINUNGALINGAN!" Another voice from the door was heard. Mingyu knew exactly who it was base on the softness of voice...and the answer from a while ago. Definitely, Jeonghan. Siya lang naman ang hindi nagpapatalo sa pagandahan. He chuckled. Niyakap rin siya nito. "Nog, naaalala mo pa ba ako? Ako nga pala yung sinayang mo-" he was cut by a manly voice. Choi Seungcheol who looks the same when they were still teens. Nakawhite na plain shirt at nakaripped jeans. As usual, he is cool.
"Hannie, huwag ka namang ganyan. Porque nagkaamnesia yung tao eh..." saway nito kay Jeonghan. "..hello Nog. Welcome back." He grinned to him and gave him a bro hug. "Nice to be back, hyung." He said to Seungcheol.
Nabulabog sila ng isang napakalakas na kalabog mula sa pinto. "Wah! Mingyu-sshi!!" Shouted Jisoo, na pagod na pagod rin at hinihingal. Kasabay niyang pumasok sa pinto si Vernon at Hoshi, mga mukhang businessman na nalugi. Mga pawis na pawis parang naghilamos. "MINGYU HYUNG!" the younger yelled and ran to him, sumunod sa kanya si Hoshi. "NAAALALA MO PA BA ANG HOCHI NG BUHAY MO, NOG?!?! YOUR FRIEND?" Hoshi feign cried. He exaggerated running and hugging him. Tila ba nanay na nawalay sa anak niya, and then he started talking like a grandma again which made Mingyu laugh.
"Yo, Nog. Remember your scariest nightmare?" Jihoon came behind Soonyoung and whispered in his ear which made the taller one surprised. "Yah! Jihoon!" He flinched. Bumalik tuloy ang memories niya at ng gitara ni Jihoon. Damn, it always hurt.
"HI MINGYU HYUNGIE!" The youngest interrupted. "Mga hyung naman eh, sinabi na nga ni tita sa daan na nakakaalala siya eh, tsk." The maknae clicked his tongue after pointing out the fact that most of his hyungs forgot.
Umiling-iling si Mingyu, kung sino pa ang mas bata siya pa ang nakaintindi. Well, it's not like Dino's still a baby, in fact he is all grown now. Nakasleeves ito at necktie at glasses na bagay na bagay sa kanya. Everyone agreed, pero nagkakagulo sila doon sa isa pang statement na sinabi ng kuya ni Mingyu na hindi lahat e naaalala niya. May mga nawawala pa ring pieces ng memories niya. While they were in the middle of arguing, pumasok sina Jun at Minghao.
Pagkakita na pagkakita ni Junhui sa kaibigan e nakisali agad ito sa yakapan. "JUNHUI WEN NGA PALA, BRO. NAAALALA MO PA BA ANG PINAKAGWAPO MONG ĶAIBIGAN?? ANG PINAKAGWAPONG SI WEN JUN-"
"Mas gwapo ako sayo, hanggang ngayon ba naman Jun," Mingyu chuckled and embraced his friend."pagbibigyan kita kasi kagigising mo lang hehe," Jun teased, hindi nalang siya pinansin ni Mingyu. "Yo Nog. Boyfriend ako ni Jun, naaalala mo pa ba ako?" Pakilala ni Minghao habang pinipingot si Jun. "Haha, oo naman. Jejemon ka pa rin ba?" He jokingly asked pero agad itong sinagot ni Jeonghan."jusme, kung alam mo lang ang hirap na pinagdadaanan ng mga mata namin tuwing nagtetext yan..." everyone sighed as a joke, pero agad na nagtawanan din sila.
Habang nagkkwentuhan e may napansin si Gyu."Kayo lang ata hindi pagod Jun..." Mingyu stated what he observed. Halos lahat kasi ng mga pumunta e pagod na pagod at pawis na pawis, tanging silang dalawa lang ni Minghao ang mukhang fresh pa rin.
"Well, unlike us, nagelevator sila." Kwan said. EveryOnE wAS sHoOkT. Unlike us daw, nagenglish siyang tama.
"TINAKBO BA NAMAN NAMIN YUNG HAGDAN KASI NAPAKABAGAL BUMABA NG ELEVATOR. AT TARAY HAH AKO ANG NAUNA KAYA ACHIEVEMENT TO!1!!" he exclaimed, halo-halo rin ang reaksyon ng mga magkakaibigan. Syempre di mawawala ang kontra-bidang si Hoshi, ang walang pake na si Jihoon, ang taga cheer na si Jisoo, at ang taga awat na si Seungcheol.
"Hay, ang lalagkit natin." Vernon said with a blank face while wiping the sweat forming on his forehead. "So ano na? Three years ka ring nagpahinga, kamusta na utak mo?" Hoshi started asking. Natigil rin sila sa wakas. Everyone huddled around Mingyu who's comfortably sitting on his bed.
"Well okay naman, kaso nabagok nga ako nitong nakaraan at hindi ko alam kung ilang araw akong tulog...pero okay na naman ako. By the way, kamusta na Junhao?" He happily asked the two, who were currently talking in their own world at the back of the room. Junhui's focus was averted to Mingyu.
"Well, we're going strong. Dapat syempre active sa lahat ng areas ng life. Alam mo naman siguro sinasabi ko diba? Hehe-" nabatukan kaagad ito ni Haoi. "Pagpasensyahan mo na 'tong kabarkada mo. Kahit kasi 3 years na ang lumipas, utak ibon pa rin 'to. Tch." Pang-aasar ni Haoi kay Jun. Under pa rin siya. He tried not to show how he's laughing inside.
"Eh yung Verkwan ko? Kamusta na Vernon, balita ko legal na legal na kayo ni Kwan ah," kahit wala naman akong nabalitaan na ganun. Mingyu smirked. Kaagad na namula si Vernon. "Hyung naman eh!" He silently screamed at his hyung. Seungkwan was just there staring at how dumb Vernon looks, idagdag pa ang katahimikan sa kwarto, silence for Vernon's dying heart. Dying from embarrassment. Tumingin si Vernon kay Seungkwan, bakas sa mukha nito kung gaano siya kadesperadi sa sasabihin niya.
"Kwan, tara muna sa labas." Yaya nito, kaagad namang sumunod si Seungkwan. Wala naman siyang choice kasi hinihila na siya ni Vernon, hindi nalang siya pumalag kahit gusto niya pang makipagkwentuhan sa mga hyung niya.
Luh sila, anyare? Even if nakakaloko si Vernon, Mingyu changed the topic.
"Eh yung...SoonHoon ko? Ikaw Jeonghan sinong nilalandi mo?" He joked. But it turned out to be awkward. Kung saan-saan nakatingin ang mga kinakausap niya, kaya naman naglakas loob na si Jeonghan na magsalita dahil na rin sa namumuong tensyon sa hangin sa loob ng kwarto. "Uh..Mingyu naman eh, binabalik mo yung nakaraan...Jicheol na uy. Tsaka straight na ako ano ba." He smiled awkwardly, looking down. Natahimik si Mingyu. Napahiya siya sa sinabi. Buti nalang e wala na ang kuya niya sa kwarto. Teka nasan na nga ba si Hyung? Di na siya nagsalita...
"Uh...nasan si hyung? He asked his friends because maybe they know. "Kasama boyfriend niya, binulong niya sakin na aalis daw muna siya tutal nandito naman kaming lahat ." Direktang sagot naman ni Jihoon habang nagsscroll sa cellphone at kumakain ng lollipop.
Teka, boyfrie-
"SINO?!"
Ikinagulat ng lahat ang lakas ng boses ni Gyu, napatakip pa ang iba ng tenga. "Luh, man. Calm down, Calm down!" Hoshi teased him.
Jihoon sighed. "Sino pa ba, edi si Jungkook." Mas nagulat pa si Mingyu. WTH ANG DAMING NANGYARI SA THREE YEARS. Hindi siya makaimik. Jeonghan snapped which made Mingyu aware of the surroundings again, "ahh, oo nga pala. Last two years nagsimula. Bale dahil sa aksidente mo na naging usapan dito, nagkaroon sila ng contact ni Taehyung, and ayun nagkatuluyan ang mga bakla." Jeonghan said.
Tumango-tango nalang si Mingyu. Hindi na malabo yun. "Sabi na nga ba't magkakatuluyan rin yung dalawang iyon sa huli eh," he whispered.
"HUY!" ginulat siya ni Seungcheol. "HUWAG KA NGANG BUMULONG AT NGUMITI DIYAN MAG-ISA MUKHA KANG SINASAPIAN EH!"
Everyone talked about how's life. Isa-isa rin silang umalis dahil may kanya-kanyang lakad at trabaho ang mga ito. Mingyu didn't ask about Wonwoo and Dokyeom and their son Minkyu. Mukhang kapag tinanong niya kasi e masira ang mood. Tiniis nalang niya ang curiousity niya hanggang sa maghapon.
Natira si Vernon sa loob. Pinagbigyan ito ng boss niya na mag sign off for the day dahil sa nangyari ngayong araw. He was watching HBO while Mingyu was having a good rest, ngunit nagising rin ito sa gutom. All day, tinapay at mansanas lang ang kinakain niya, sinong masasatisfy doon? Lalo na't malaki ang bodega ni Mingyu sa pagkain. Gutom na ako...
"Vernon, wala ka bang pera jan? Bili mo akong kanin tsaka ulam okaya tatlong ramyeon, gutom na ako," reklamo niya dito. Agad na tumayo si Hansol upang kapain ang mga bulsa niya, what a good friend. He uttered a yes when he discovered he carried his wallet with him. "Kahit ano ba hyung?" He asked before leaving. "Yes. Basta kanin, kapag walang masarap na ulam edi tatlong ramyeon nalang. Ingat ka Noo. Salamat~"
He then left. Mingyu was left there, sitting and feeling the cold breeze from the opened sliding door leading to the small terrace to his right. Naisipan niyang sumakay sa wheelchair at magmuni-muni muna doon. Thank goodness at hindi siya naout of balance or anything. Actually kaya naman niyang maglakad, pero ngayon nalang uli siya nakasakay ng wheelchair simula noong natuto siyang gumamit ng tungkod sa paglalakad dahil sa kapansanan niya, kaya naman gusto niyang matry ulit.
He closed his eyes after stopping at the center of the open space. The cold breeze reminded him of his last Christmas with Wonwoo. Where they pretended to be in a relationship, so fun that he almost told him how he really felt. "Hay..." he sighed. Nag ILY pa ata ako nun sa kanya....he chuckled. Nagholding hands din kami...kinikikig ito habang nagpplayback ng memories nilang dalawa. Para siyang tangang bigla nalang ngumingiti.
Maya-maya pa e nakaramdam siya ng malamig na dumapo sa gilid ng mata niya. Kaagad itong natunaw dahil sa init rin ng temperatura ng katawan niya, like a tear it fell down his cheeks. And suddenly, he missed him. "...I miss him." He muttered to the wind, repeatedly. I miss him. I love him.
And to his great surprise, the wind answered. "I missed you too." At first he thought, napakalala siguro ng bagok ko sa ulo. And he ignored it. But it repeated. "I missed you." Louder and clearer than anything he's hearing. Louder than his heart and the cold snow breeze outside.
That deep voice, it can't belong to the wind, right? Unless nababaliw na talaga siya at ganito pala talaga kalala ang deperensya na iniwan ng aksidente sa kanya.
He tilted his head slowly, but he felt warm hands behind him, snaking to his neck, caressing his shoulders and then it was across his chest, embracing him. "I miss you, nakakaalala ka pa ba?" The voice was trembling, but Mingyu didn't noticed. He was too surprised to notice.
"W-Wonwoo?" He stuttered. Ang kaninang natunaw na nyebe ay tuluyang naging luha. Naluha siya. Three years. "Ikaw ba talaga yan, Wonu?" Everything was new again when he called Wonwoo how he remembers Wonu liked to be called. "Wonu?" He repeated softly, but the latter was not responding. Nararamdaman ni Mingyu na unti-unting nababasa ang likuran ng damit niya at may naririnig siyang tahimik na paghikbi. Wonwoo was avoiding to make sounds because whimpering sound terrible to a man, he thought. But to Mingyu, a crying Wonwoo is the cutest.
Nagpunas ito ng luha bago humarap kay Mingyu. "T-Tara pasok muna tayo, malamig na dito." He said. He is still cute when he cries, the tall one thought.
Itinulak ni Wonwoo ang wheelchair papasok. He guided Mingyu to his bed and didn't say a word. Nabasag ang katahimikan nang nagring ang cellphone ni Wonwoo ng dalawang beses.
"Wonwoo, ikaw muna ang bahala diyan kay Mingyu. Baka kasi lumakas ang snow na 'to, walang tao dito sa bahay atsaka may trabaho pa si Jungkook. Pinadala na namin kay Dokyeom ang mga damit ni Gyu, dumaan kasi siya dito kala niya pumunta ka dito eh. Mag-usap kayo, okay? Sinabi ko na sayo ang sitwasyon kaya ikaw na ang bahalang maghandle, wala siyang alam. Bye."
It was a text from Taehyung. Wonwoo scrunched his face. Sinong tinutukoy niya? Si Dokyeom o si Gyu? Pero kahit na naguluhan siya, binalewala nalang niya ito. And then he viewed the other text which was from Vernon.
"Hyung, pinapauwi na ako ni Mom, nag-aalala na daw siya at mukhang lalakas tong snow. Ikaw muna magpakain kay Hyung hah? Hindi ko na madedeliver tong binili ko eh, thank you and sorry."
Hay. Wonwoo sighed. Kagagaling niya lang ng trabaho at dagdag stress pa ang traffic papuntang ospital pero ayos lang. At least nakabisita siya ngayong araw. Buti nalang may extra clothes at food akong dala.
Inilabas niya ang pagkaing baon mula sa isang chinese restaurant. "Kumain ka muna, Gyu." He handed him the chopsticks and the bowl of food that he has already prepared. "Tatawagan ko muna si Dokyeom para kamustahin yung mga bata." Wonwoo said before closing the door. Sa halip na kumain, napaisip si Mingyu.
Nag ampon sila uli...? Sabi niya 'mga bata.'
Nawalan siya ng gana sa naisip pero agad naman niyang chineer up ang sarili, like he always do. OKAY LANG YAN MINGYU, HUWAG KA NA KASING MAG ISIP. Isinubo niya ang pagkain at kumain ng tahimik hanggang sa bumalik si Wonwoo.
"Kamusta? Naaalala mo ba ako? Anong mga naaalala mo?" He asked and got himself a bowl of rice. Mingyu swallowed his food before speaking. "Yung mga years na sinayang natin, yung sakit ko at pagkabulag ko, yung sa ice skating birthday surprise mo, si Kookie ko, atsaka..." natigilan ito. Hindi ba insensitive topics ang mga nasabi ko?
"Tsaka?" Wonwoo waited.
Tama bang sabihin ko? Eh nagtanong siya eh...AISH BAHALA NA. "...tsaka kayo ni Dokyeom mo. Pati si Minkyu...yung sa park."
Mingyu can't look in Wonwoo's eyes. Sa totoo lang, sinadya niyang maging insensitive kasi ganun rin naman si Wonwoo. Paano niyang nagawang banggitin si Dokyeom at ipagyabang pa ang mga anak nila sa kanya lalo na at alam naman nito na masasaktan siya? It was rude for Mingyu. Kagigising ko lang tapos ayon kaagad...Nadala lang siya ng emosyon kaya nasabi niya ang mga nangyari sa nakaraan nilang dalawa ni Wonwoo. Sabi na nga ba at awkward eh, bobo ko talaga. Sinisi niya ang sarili. Kumain nalang siya ulit para kahit papaano e may ingay na naririnig sa kwarto, iningayan niya ang pagkukutsara at ang pagnguya. "...uh..."
Bumukas bigla ang pinto. Iniluwa nito ang dalawang batang lalaki at ang mukha ni Dokyeom na nakadungaw na parang bata. "Hi Mingyu, do you remember? Me? The me?" Makulit na tanong nito. Of course I do. As usual, nakakasilaw ang ngiti nito. Nakasuot ito ng makapal na jacket, tulad ng mga bata. May mga puti-puti pa sila sa ulo na katibayan ng snow sa labas.
Mingyu nodded bitterly, masyado pa rin kasing awkward ang sitwasyon niya para makapagsalita ng casual. "...uhm, may nangyari ba? Bakit ang tahimik niyong dalawa? Anyways, ayan na ang mga bata. Sabi ng lola nila, dito muna daw sila kasama ang appa nila, may extra futon akong dala sa kotse, ipapadala ko sa staff, hah? Ciao~" agad na lumabas rin ito matapos papasukin ang dalawang bata na may dalang unan.
"Appa!" The older one said. Mingyu quickly recognized him, nabawasan ang tinis ng boses nito. It was Minkyu. Malaki na siya. Mingyu smiled, he is eight by now. They still call him appa, bakit hindi nalang eomma eh siya naman ang bottom sa-
Natigil si Mingyu nang niyakap siya ng dalawang bata. And hey, the other kid was that kid from earlier. "Appa! Parinig po ng boses mo, appa!" The younger who seems to be four years of age addressed and looked to him like a puppy, excited and wagging its tail. "Appa! Mataas grade ko sa English! Top 1 ako! Kaya please, huwag ka na ulit matutulog ng matagal, ah?" Minkyu said, burrying his face on Mingyu's tummy. Mingyu managed to tilt his head to Wonu's direction, he's in the verge of crying, masasabing tinatanong niya sa pamamagitan ng pagtingin na iyon kung siya ba talaga ang appa kuno o nananaginip na naman siya. Buong araw na siyang gulat na gulat sa mga nangyayari.
Wonwoo just nodded and smiled. "Appa! Nakikinig ka ba! Masama daw pong matulog palagi, dapat nageexercise! Magexercise tayo kapag magaling ka na, hah appa?" Anong nangyayari?
Lumapit si Wonwoo sa kanila at hinawakan ang mga bata, pinaharap niya ang mga ito sa kanya. "Minkyu, Minwoo, kailangan magpahinga ng appa niyo. Huwag niyo na muna siyang galawin o daganan okay? Paparating na ang inutusan ni Dokkie-ahjussi niyo dala ang tulugan ninyo, kaya umupo muna kayo sa labas abangan niyo siya, kakausapin ko muna si appa niyo, okay?" He gently said and smiled at the kids. He even pat their heads. The kids look at Mingyu, pouting, one last time before going outside. On the other hand, Mingyu still can't believe everything. Nanlalaki pa rin ang mga mata nito at tulala.
Pagkalabas ng dalawa e niyakap kaagad ni Wonu si Mingyu. Agad na nabalik si Mingyu sa realidad. Walang pake si Wonwoo kahit sinasabi ni Mingyu na hindi siya makahinga, basta wala siyang balak bumitaw hangga't hindi pa siya tapos sa sasabihin.
"...walang hiya ka." Are the first words he muttered. Mingyu was confused af, he found it funny actually. It was so Wonu, sharp tongue as always, I love that. "Hinanap kita ng tatlong beses, pero kinalimutan mo ako..." mas lalo pang naguluhan si Mingyu. The fuck? "Wonu...ano bang sinasabi mo? Wala akong maintindihan? Prank ba 'to? Tigilan niyo ako ah, kagigising ko lang-"
Hindi siya pinansin ni Wonwoo. Patuloy lang ito sa pagsasalita ng mga gusto niyang sabihin. "K-Kaya pala hindi Honeybunch ang tawag mo sakin nung nakita mo ako, alam kong korni pero ikaw ang nagsabing iyon ang itatawag mo sakin," he began to cry. "T-Tangina mo, salamat at naalala mo na rin sa wakas. Mahal na mahal kita, sabi ko naman sayo...hahanapin kita kahit anong mangyari eh." Narinig ni Wonu na suminghal ang kasama. "Siguro nababaliw na talaga ako, teka nga. Bumitaw ka-" he pushed Wonu but he failed.
Instead, he got a kiss to shut him up. Wonu passionately kissed Mingyu. For every move, a memory was being played in his mind. "Naniniwala ka ba sa reincarnation?" Another move, and then he remembered his dreams.But this time with colored images. First was in the middle of a road, where he was bleeding to death. "Kim Mingyu, gumising ka, kilala mo ba ako? Hey!" A woman who was lending him her lap said, ginigising siya nito pero wala siyang nagawa kundi ang magpadala sa nararamdamang antok.
"Kim Mingyu...h-hindi mo ba ako maalala?" the second one said. It was a man this time. "Gyu..." His voice trembled and he felt his arms being held by bloody and weak hands. Bakit niya ako kilala? The Mingyu in the memory thought. The man even kissed his hand and wrote his name before his eyes closed and his breathing stopped. He wrote, Wonu. By that time, he has no fucking clue what it means.
And the last one was in a hospital bed. "Hoy Nog, huwag mo naman akong kalimutan! Kaming lahat! Yung promise ko, nakalimutan mo na ba?" Niyuyugyog siya nito pero hindi siya nagigising. He also remembered how painful his illness was in that life. Kaya siya sumuko, kasi hindi na niya kaya. And then he heard a long beep sound. "...sorry." He managed to say before everything went black and doomed.
Akala niya e tapos na ang flashbacks. Pero may pahabol pa.
"...gyu....huwag mo kaming iwan...."
"...STOP THE BLEEDING, CRITICAL NA ANG PASYENTE-"
"SIR...SIR HUWAG PO KAYONG PIPIKIT!"
"Anak...lumaban ka. Nandito kaming lahat, hinihintay kang dumilat."
"Hoy...panget...huwag mo naman kaming takutin..."
"Mingyu....hahanapin kita. Promise..."
It was from the very first. Kaya walang images kasi...naririnig ko lang sila. He almost bit his lower lip till it bleed. He fucking wants to rewind everything. He died in every flashback. Lahat ng flashback, malungkot.
He...he found me every single time and I didn't even remembered him...? Not even once... Well, that must really hurt. Maging sa buhay nila ngayon, na hindi niya alam kung paano napunta dito (kasi sila na) , e hindi niya naalala ang nakaraan. I guess he made me fall for him all over again. Iniisip palang niya e nangingisi na siya.
After seconds of processing everything, he kissed him back, aggressively. Na parang maibabalik nito ang mga panahong hindi niya naalala ang pinakamahalagang tao sa mundo niya. His hands are exploring Wonwoo's back. "I'm sorry," he panted and resumed. "I love you." He said and felt their lips sync again, tasting every part. Filling in every missing memory. When they stopped to breathe and control themselves, his tears fell. "I'm an idiot." He whispered, voice cracking.
Wonwoo smiled and held his cheeks. "Oo, ni hindi mo napansin na hindi ka bulag dito, tanga mo talaga kaya mahal kita eh," Mingyu suddenly realized and it made him giggle, tangina, bobo ko talaga. Wonwoo pulled him.
Then they continued kissing, sucking, and biting each other's lips. Savoring every turns, starving for every move. They felt hotter. Both hearts are beating much more alive than before. Mingyu stopped to carry Wonwoo by his hips, inilagay niya ang sarili niya sa gitna ng mga hita nito at pinaupo si Wonwoo sa harapan niya. Mingyu snaked his hands under Wonu's shirt, feeling his bare back and his partner's warmth, even teasing Wonwoo by rubbing his big mole which is located at his side, his waist. And it was sensitive, Wonwoo flinched and bit his lower lip.
"I'm sorry." Their foreheads touched. Mingyu's eyes were closed. "I'm really sorry. Hindi kita naalala agad, sorry Wonu..." his tears continued non-stop. Everything was just surreal. "Shush...it's okay, Gyu. Ang mahalaga nakaalala ka na. At may anak pa tayo." Wonwoo smiled and placed his arms around Mingyu's neck as he stole a peck on his lips. Right, you even named the other after your son in your previous life. Mingyu smiled and he can't help but bite Wonu's neck when he thought about it, just thinking about it makes him even more happy. And greedy.
"Ang bango mo," he whispered. His voice was hoarse, napatawa si Wonu dahil hindi ito tunog malandi kundi tunog na parang nananakot. "Pft- uminom ka muna kaya ng tubig? Atsaka pakawalan mo na ako, hindi ako aalis sa tabi mo, Honeybunch." Wonu teased. Pucha, bakit honeybunch ang baduy. "HUN NALANG WONU, JUSME NABIBINGI AKO SA HONEYBUNCH," Mingyu exclaimed. "Asus~ ganun rin eh, sige na nga, Hun. Pakawalan mo na ako, bwisit ka baka hindi ako makapagpigil," he blushed after admitting it. Pati si Mingyu e nangitim-este namula. Pota ang kyot. "...Wonu. Okay lang na hindi magpigil." He smirked and managed to pull off the duck lips, he made it even more sexier with a wink.
Tinitigan lang siya ni Wonu bago paluin sa braso. "Yah, wala ka talagang patience. Tumigil ka nga. Baka pumasok bigla ang mga-"
"APPA! APPA!" SHIT.Agad na lumipat si Wonu sa upuan na para bang narape sa sistema ng pananamit niya. Buti nalang may kurtina na nakaharang. Inayos niya ito kaagad nang mapansin na nakatingin sa kanya ang bunso. "A-Ano yun, Minwoo?"he asked the child.
"Naaalala po ba tayo ni appa?" The two boys gathered around Wonwoo."...hindi niya po kasi kami hinug kanina..." Wonwoo glare at Mingyu, nginisihan lang ito ng nakababata.
Hindi, sabihin mo hindi. Mingyu told Wonu using his eyes as he shakes his head. Wonwoo smiled when he realized what was on with Mingyu. He definitely wants to hear how things went between us before the kids. "...hindi tayo naaalala ng appa niyo ng mabuti pero kilala niya kayo, gusto niyo bang ikwento ko ang lahat ng nangyari kay appa niyo bago kayo matulog? How we met and how we became a family?" He asked enthusiastically. The kids eagerly answered, "Yeah! Tingnan natin kung maalala na ni appa kapag narinig na niya yung dapat niyang maalala!" Said the older. "O'nga eomma! Tapos hindi na uli matutulog si appa! Di na uli iiyak si eomma," Wonwoo smiled when his younger kid spouted a secret and hugged him so cutely. He saw Mingyu's face was scrunched again and probably, nervous.
"Sige," Wonwoo clapped. "Higa na kayong dalawa sa tabi ng appa niyo, huwag niyo nang hintayin ang futon."
"Pero sabi ni eomma kanina, hindi pa magaling si appa kaya bawal siyang daganan," the younger kid answered, concerned of his father. "Okay na pala ang appa, Minwoo. Magaling na siya kaya tabihan niyo na siya, okay?"
"Okay!" The kids went up Mingyu's bed, lying beside him, each head on each strong arms, they hugged him like a pillow. They looked at Wonwoo and waited for him to start telling stories from the past. Minkyu was sucking his thumb while Minwoo was nuzzling to his shirt. For the first time, Mingyu thought it's great to have kids. Dati kasi ayaw niya talaga sa mga bata. Or should we say, naging bitter siya ng kaunti. Anyways, he felt this warm feeling again. It was great.
Wonwoo cleared his throat. He gave each kid a kiss on their forehead and gave Mingyu a peck on the lips which made the latter flush red. Maging ang mga bata e inasar sila, but Wonu just say "it's natural for your parents."
Parents....Mingyu thought. Paulit-ulit, hindi niya mapigilang kiligin. Siguro kung wala ang mga bata kanina pa siya nawalan ng kontrol sa sarili, but oh well. "Ehem," Wonwoo faked coughed, when everyone's attention was on him, he began telling their story.
A story full of twists, crazines, bitterness, love, failure, happiness, sadness, adventure and healing. From the very start, he began. "It was during the first day in college, I was sitting silently reading a book when an idiot from heaven fell on me..."
---
"Psst." Mingyu interrupted. Jeon Wonwoo was sleeping beside his bed, holding Minwoo's hand. The children are sleeping soundly. "Hmm?" Dahan-dahang inangat ni Wonu ang ulo niya habang tinititigan siya ng masama. Oops.
He gestured for Wonwoo to lean closer to him. "Nakakaintindi ba sila ng english?" He whispered loudly, referring to the kids.
"Mana sa akin ang mga yan, kaya oo." He imitated Mingyu's way of speaking, both of them giggled softly. "Matulog ka na nga," Wonwoo went back to his position.
Mingyu frowned. Hindi ito nagsalita at tinitigan lang si Wonu. "Bakit ka nakatitig," Mingyu did not answered.
Then he felt Wonwoo's hand on his, Wonwoo guided his hand to the corner of his eyes. "You feel that?" He asked, agad na napatingin si Mingyu. That's unfair...suddenly being sweet. He blushed. "Hihihi~ Hun, hindi ako bulag-"
"But could you feel that?" Tinitigan siya ni Wonwoo. Oh, those cold eyes. "Ang ano ba?" Nahihiyang tanong niya. "Na papikit na ako, gago ka." Wonwoo sarcastically said "may work pa ako bukas...", it made Mingyu frown. "Ang sama mo talaga." Pagtatampo nito, sabay bawi sa kamay niya. Pero agad naman itong binawi pabalik ni Wonwoo. Mingyu sulked, he insisted not to look at his love even though he really wants to.
"Eto? Nararamdaman mo ba?" Jeon Wonwoo asked again. Dahan-dahang napatingin si Mingyu sa kanya, with a hint of softness in his gaze. "...oo naman." He smiled as tears of joy fell down his cheeks.
"Good..." Wonwoo whispered, kissing Mingyu's knuckles and placing it there again, on his chest."...sayo lang yan. Huwag mo na uli akong ipapamigay."
"...hmm." he hummed in response. Unti-unti na siyang napapapikit dahil sa antok. Maging si Wonwoo e ganun rin. "...huwag mo na uli akong kakalimutan..." he muttered again. I won't. Ever. He answered in his head.
"...Huwag mo na rin ....ulit akong... iiwan...okay?" Pahina ng pahina ang boses nito.
Mingyu opened his eyes to see Wonwoo crying himself to sleep, silently. Just like how he always did whenever he visits him for three years. Oo, narinig niya. Naaalala niya. He was always saying those three favors. Pero may kaunting pagkakaiba. Palagi itong umiiyak at nagtatanong kung bakit niya ito iniwan...bakit kinalimutan at bakit ipinaubaya. He sighed after remembering it.
He has cried enough. He's had enough.
Pinunasan niya ang luha nito. He's also asleep. He smiled as he stared at him, Wonwoo looks so vulnerable, unguarded, or maybe simply okay and relieved because...he has finally found his peace. He is safe. The moment Mingyu saw him, he also felt the same. This will be the last time you cry.
He wiped a tear."I promise." Mingyu sincerely whispered before closing his wet eyes and dreaming of the beautiful future. A future with his healing.
The end.
----
Thank you so much for reading Healing. Love ya~♥♥♥
#MEANIEFOREVER
Announcements and other things on the next UD. ;))))
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