"Please leave, Jackson. I'm not in the mood for your bullshit. And can you fucking change back? I already have enough shit going on, I'm tired of this! Now leave me the fuck alone!" Stiles exclaimed out loud, chucking a pillow in Jackson's direction as he fell face-first into his bed; Jackson standing in the doorway of Stiles's room. Contemplating his options, Jackson huffed once before climbing into bed with Stiles, curling up at his feet, trying to comfort his mate who had started to sob quietly.
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"Why's life gotta be so hard Jackson? I just want my own best friend to pay attention to me for once, but he's too invested in his stupid girlfriend, and like I'm not mad at Allison because I know she would never do it on purpose, but fucking Scott. He keeps abandoning me and then comes running back later when he has a problem he can't solve. And I can't take it anymore! I was there for him whenever he needed me, but where has he been? Where the hell has fucking Scott been?" Shaking in anger and frustration, Stiles lashed out crying and screaming, glad that his dad had the late shift tonight.
It's been the same routine over and over again with Stiles breaking down and crying himself to sleep. Jackson was glad he found his mate, even in this state of pain and sorrow. It was better than Stiles six feet under, but Jackson couldn't let this go on any longer. He was grateful Stiles had found him and let Jackson into his home and now Jackson was going to return the favor.
Normally, Jackson would curl up at the feet of Stiles's bed, afraid of stepping over some boundaries, but it's been over two weeks since Jackson has been taking shelter here and Stiles hasn't gotten any better, in fact, the teen was looking a lot worse for wear. Unbeknownst to Jackson, Stiles had been putting up a front for his dad and school. He didn't want anyone to know that he was going through a rough patch, but now that Jackson had squirmed his way into Stiles's life again, he couldn't help but let his walls start to crumble. They were still standing, but it was only a matter of time before the whole structure collapsed on Stiles.
Stiles did have his good days and his bad ones though. However, Jackson couldn't even really call them good days to be honest, they were just good compared to the bad days.
Stiles had a habit of closing in on himself and pulling away, nearly dissociating for hours. Normally he would only disconnect for an hour or two, these instances never lasted long, but they did happen far too often for Jackson's liking. During these periods, Stiles would be unresponsive, any nudges and attempts at getting a reaction from him were met with naught. The only thing Jackson could do during these times was stay by Stiles's side and wait for the affair to pass and help Stiles get reacquainted with the living world again.
Although those weren't the greatest days, at least Jackson knew that Stiles would always come back to him, but there was one time where Stiles almost didn't come back, and that scared Jackson the most.
Jackson had only been with Stiles for over a week at the time, so he was already familiar with how Stiles often detached from time to time, but it usually happened at home where Jackson could look after his mate. However, one time Stiles had returned from school already dissociated and had apparently driven himself home in that state. Jackson hadn't realized until Stiles had walked into the house and walked straight up to his room, completely unaware of Jackson who was warily following him from behind.
Normally Stiles would come home and greet Jackson, telling him about his day while making a snack (a daily routine that Jackson had pushed into Stiles when he noticed the other wasn't eating enough) and would just keep talking about anything and everything. Jackson absolutely loved those days, hearing Stiles's voice, his smooth timber that would sometimes pitch into a squeak when he got excited about something, it was usually the best part of Jackson's day and it made waiting for Stiles to come home worth it.
But this time, Stiles had come home and planted himself in his bed, not even attempting to change into comfortable clothes. For the next hour, Jackson had settled himself on the floor next to the bed, watching the human sit and gaze blankly. This had gone on all day until night fell and Stiles had seemed to shake part of the spell off, but it was obviously Stiles was still stuck in his headspace.
Stiles moved around, following the motions of taking a shower and brushing his teeth before getting into bed to sleep, but he stayed silent the entire time, ignoring Jackson who had kept trying to nudge his legs for a reaction. Eventually, Stiles had fallen asleep, and Jackson was dumbfounded, this had never happened before, Stiles had never dissociated for more than a few hours, but it was midnight now and Stiles had returned from school at three. Jackson didn't know what to do, but hoped that when Stiles woke up the next morning, things would return back to normal.
But things didn't. The next morning, Stiles had gone through the same routine of getting ready, his actions looking very robotic to Jackson at one point, and Stiles had once again left for school, skipping breakfast in addition to yesterday's dinner. And Jackson watched Stiles go through this cycle for days, worriedly trailing after his mate day after day, trying his hardest to get some kind of response from Stiles, trying to get his mate to eat something after skipping too many meals but it was hopeless.
Feeling defeated, Jackson didn't know what to do, he had tried everything he could think of and the sheriff was too busy at work to have noticed Stiles's situation to help. That is, Jackson had tried everything but physical comfort, Stiles had begun to purposely avoid touch, shying away from his dad whenever he could without raising suspicion, and Jackson had respected that until now.
Stiles had forced Jackson's hand, Jackson repeated to himself, trying to convince himself that he had to do it despite his mate's obvious dislike for any physical contact right now, and although this may backfire on the werewolf, Jackson had to at least try, it was the only option left.
Instead of climbing in bed to curl up at his feet like usual, Jackson slowly moved up the bed, eyes watching Stiles for signs of disagreement until Jackson finally perched by Stiles's head. The other had his head perched on a pillow, lying on his side and gazing blankly at the wall.
Jackson paused briefly in hesitation, before finally lowering himself onto Stiles's bed, curling his body as close to Stiles as possible until it was hard to tell where Jackson ended and Stiles started. Jackson wasn't sure if Stiles was going to react positively, if he was going to react at all, but it was the other thing Jackson could offer Stiles, physical comfort.
Stiles had remained unmoving for the better part of the next hour, only moving to adjust Jackson's ear, pushing it away so it wasn't jabbing his face, but had soon settled. Hour two and still nothing, Stiles had remained fixed in their position, eyes still cloudy, but body warm. In the middle of the third hour, Stiles had seemed to regain some control of his body and surprised Jackson by slowly running his hands through Jackson's fur. At first, Stiles's hand had started between Jackson's ears, but at the end of the hour, Stiles was running his palm from Jackson's flank up to his head and back. Excited, Jackson had hoped that Stiles would soon finally wake up from his headspace, but to his dismay, Stiles had remained the same for the next two hours, and eventually, Jackson, who was unable to contain his sleepiness, drifted to sleep in Stiles's arms.
The next time Jackson woke up, he was still tangled with Stiles, his body still curled around Stiles's body, except Jackson noticed a bit of pressure that wasn't there the night before. He found arms were wrapped around him, a new change from their previous position... had Stiles moved during the night? Was he back?
Trying to climb down from the bed to check on Stiles, Jackson felt the arms tighten, and Jackson froze. For a few moments, nothing changed, Stiles had remained buried in Jackson's fur, but after a few minutes of Stiles realizing that Jackson wasn't going to leave, the dam broke.
Jackson's heart shattered at the sound of Stiles breaking the silence with his cries, no longer trying to hide his sobs of sorrow. Burying his snout in Stiles's hair in comfort, Jackson found Stiles's scent intoxicating and hoped he would never have to live without it. Interrupting Jackson's thoughts, Stiles's arms which had previously been wrapped around Jackson had moved to clutch at his chest instead. Stiles's grip was a bit too tight for Jackson's comfort, but nevertheless, Jackson was happy that Stiles didn't push him away.
The two stayed laying in bed, Jackson's chest rumbling in comfort as Stiles continued to cry, tears soaking Jackson's fur coat, wrapped in Jackson's heat.
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"Jackson, stop, get off my bed. You're an amazing pillow to sleep with when you don't move, but off you stupid dog. You're getting dog hair all over my bed and I don't want to clean it up unless you're finally willing to change back and clean up your own mess," Jackson craned his neck at Stiles, his tongue slipping out as he wolfishly grinned at Stiles while the other huffed in complaint. "I hate you, now behave, I have to go to school. You're such a lucky ass, how'd you even convince your parents to drop you from the semester?"
Stiles turned away from Jackson to gather all the loose sheets of paper that contained his homework and shoved them into his bag without a care for the state of the papers before zipping up his bag and slinging it onto his back. Finally turning back to Jackson who was still lounging on his bed, Stiles sent one last amused glare, before giving up in resignation when Jackson didn't give in and move.
Stiles rolled his eyes and sighed playfully at the werewolf, "Fine, you win this round, but try not to scare dad, I still haven't told him that I have a refuge werewolf hidden in my room and he wouldn't appreciate finding out just because you got restless from being cooped up in here, which I will also add is your fault because you followed me home and wouldn't leave my bed. OW! Jackson!" Stiles growled out, swatting Jackson's muzzle lightly before he could take another nip at Stiles.
"Urgh, please behave, my dad's home for once and I would like to spend some quality father-son time, please. And I'll take you out after, I know it's not safe with the Alpha pack, but if you're really feeling agitated, then we can go for a run. And hopefully avoid them all," Stiles muttered and dropped back onto the bed next to Jackson, rubbing the werewolf's ear affectionately.
"Alright, I gotta go before I'm late, do you want to stay in my room and I'll take you out later, or do you want to leave now and I'll look for you after?" Jackson huffed and only moved to tuck his large head against Stiles' chest in reply, "I guess that means you're staying. Bye Jax, be good for me, okay?"
With one last ear pet, Jackson watched as Stiles stumbled off the bed and out the door, starting the Jeep and leaving as soon as he could when Stiles realized he was going to be late.
Jackson huffed and settled back onto Stiles's bed telling himself he would just nap until Stiles got back, drifting off and he buried his nose deeper into Stiles's sheets, sighing in content as every breath he inhaled was filled with his delicious mate's scent.
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"WHAT THE HELL! STILES!" Jackson jolted upright and jumped down, ready to defend Stiles's room even though his mate wasn't home from school yet before he realized that he was growling at the Sheriff.
The Sheriff stood in the doorway, gun in hand aimed right at Jackson. Said werewolf whimpered, and rested his head on top of his paws, curling around himself as he tried to make himself as small as possible in hopes to calm the Sheriff down and show that he was harmless. Jackson hoped to god he wouldn't shoot, normal bullets don't hurt as much as wolfsbane ones, but a bullet was still a bullet and that shit was going to be a pain to dig out.
The Sheriff watched cautiously as the large wolf padded away from him slowly before taking cover behind Stiles's bed when the Sheriff made no move to shoot and kept the safety on. "Oh jeez, I need a drink. And I'm going to kill Stiles when he gets home. Why the hell does he have a wolf hidden in his room?"
The Sheriff ran a hand down his face, muttering he was too old for this before tucking his gun away and creeping a little closer to the hidden wolf who inched away slowly until the werewolf hit Stiles's bedside table and whimpered in fear.
Jackson had no clue what the Sheriff was doing; was he going to shoot him? Kick him out? But he didn't have time to think before he saw the Sheriff's hand move down to grab Jackson and he cried out in surprise before taking cover under Stiles's bed.
The Sheriff watched, slightly amused as the wolf kept inching back when he kept sweeping his arm, "Ugh, come on out, if you're hiding under Stiles's bed then I don't think you're much of a threat. In fact, I think Stiles's bed is the bigger danger considering who knows what's down there. Come on, how does some fried chicken sound, and Stiles can't say shit because he's been hiding you in his room for who knows how long."
Jackson peeked out from under the bed, eyeing the hand that was presented to him as well as the thought of some good food, the Sheriff watched as Jackson contemplated his options before crawling back out, sniffing the Sheriff's hand in delight as he realized how similar the Sheriff's scent was to Stiles's. Of course, the two shared a familiarity in scents because they were father and son, but Jackson hadn't gotten the chance to explore the Sheriff's full scent until now.
The Sheriff grinned as the wolf finally came out of hiding and trotted along beside him as they climbed down the stairs and into the kitchen where he began to set up the ingredients, looking for chicken in the fridge to fry for the blonde wolf.
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"Hey dad, I'm home," Stiles slammed the door shut on his way in when he heard his dad call him into the kitchen. "Hey daddio, whatcha got there? Is that fried chicken?! I thought I told you no unhealthy food!"
"Chicken is healthy, Stiles, otherwise it wouldn't be in the fridge where I can eat it. And also, I think I deserve to treat myself today, which by the way son, when were you going to tell me about the wolf hiding in your room?"
Stiles blanched, wondering how his dad found out. "Uh, dad what are you talking about? There's no wolf around here. Where, I don't see one anywhere, are you sure you're not seeing things? It could be your old age getting to you you know," his dad just glared at him from the other side of the counter before pointing down. Stiles craned his head to look past the counter below to find Jackson sprawled across the floor chewing on a chicken bone. Oh god, his dad was going to kill him.
"Now, would you like to explain to me why this little guy has been here for who knows how long?" Stiles scratched the back of his head trying to come up with something believable because surely his dad would believe him if he said he found Jackson in the preserve and how he followed Stiles home. Nope, there are too many things wrong with that, such as the fact that Stiles wasn't even supposed to be out that day and his dad was going to find out that his had hidden Jackson in his room for over two weeks, and the explanation to his dad about how he knew the werewolf was actually Jackson and not some random stray? Yep, not a chance his dad was going to take that answer well, along with probably sending him to Eichen house. Yep, definitely not telling his dad that.
Stiles finally lifted his head after piecing together his well thought-out lie only to look up and see his dad's glare, "Hehe, I found him and he followed me home?"
"You sure about that son?" Stiles just smiled meekly before moving back slowly, the Sheriff watched with pure amusement on his face as Stiles reached the doorway and right before dashing off, the blond wolf tackled Stiles to the ground.
"Jackson! Now is not the time you— OW! Get off of me or I swear to god! JAckson!" The Sheriff raised an eyebrow, Jackson, he wondered if this wolf had anything to do with Jackson's withdrawal for the semester.
"Okay, okay, belly rub. Oh my god, you're the biggest pain in my ass ever, and I told you to stay away from my dad," Stiles grumbled out as he continued to pet the wolf who had wedged his way into Stiles's jacket, rumbling contently.
"And who said he found me? What if I found him sleeping in your bed? You should've seen what happened when I pointed a gun at him" that was where Stiles began to panic.
"Oh my god dad, you didn't shoot him did you?" Stiles's voice shrill as he checked over Jackson who was pushing against Stiles's wandering hands, trying to take in more of his scent while Stiles pushed back trying to see and feel for any sign of injuries.
The Sheriff chuckled, "No, he let out a cry and hid behind your bed and when I came closer and cornered him, he dove under your bed; must've traumatized the poor thing hiding under there," he paused to hear Stiles's squawk of denial of how there was nothing bad beneath his bed before continuing. "I coaxed him out with some fried chicken. And now that I've truthfully explained how I found your little friend, why don't you tell me what you were doing when he followed you home and what on earth made you think it was okay to take home a wolf as a pet?"
"Hehe, I heard something in the woods and ran into him?" The Sheriff sighed and sat down before replying.
"Why don't you sit down and explain to me what's been going on in Beacon Hills, I'm not an idiot Stiles. I know you've been keeping secrets, and I was okay thinking it was just a little teenage rebellion, but this has crossed the line. Now why don't you tell me everything from start to finish."
"We're gonna be here for a while dad, and you might not believe me–" The Sheriff cut his son off with an eye-roll and groaned.
"Just tell me, Stiles, I love you son and I want to help. Besides, I'm not accepting anything, but the truth if you plan on keeping that wolf in my house."
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Falling face-first into his bed, Stiles was groaning in exasperation before feeling Jackson jump into the bed on top of him. "Ow, you stupid werewolf, get off of me. It's all your fault my dad found out and now he knows everything. And I can't believe he didn't go crazy when I told him you were a werewolf, I swear it was like he already knew of the supernatural and I just humored him or something, that old man."
Ignoring Stiles, Jackson whined for attention, pressing his muzzle into his mate's hands, only preening happily when Stiles ran his hands down his back and back up to scratch at his ears lightly. "You think there's any chance he already knew about the supernatural and was just waiting for me to confess? I think so, he was so patient though, I wonder how much he actually knew before. Oh! Do you think he knew about Derek and the Hale pack a while ago? Do you think that's why he was so defensive about taking Derek into custody because of Scott?"
Relaxed from hearing Stiles's voice as he kept mumbling theories, Jackson continued to steal any and every drop of attention Stiles gave him, feeling euphoric by the amount of affection Stiles was feeding him. "Hey, Jax?"
The werewolf looked up, tongue lolling out of mouth, ears perking in delight at the nickname Stiles had recently given him, "Not that I don't mind you in wolf form, but are you ever going to shift back? I mean, sure you were a pain in my ass, but I really would like having someone to talk to now that the pack is ignoring me."
Jackson's heart broke hearing the sorrow in his mate's voice, but he also couldn't help but think about what Stiles had asked him. Was he ever going to shift back? Could he even? But if he shifted back, that meant Stiles was going to abandon him like before and constantly argue with him, and Jackson didn't want that. He wanted to keep his mate happy and if staying in wolf form was the only way to keep Stiles happy then he would do it, especially considering the fact that Stiles gave him a lot of attention, and now that the Sheriff knew, there was no point in hiding anymore. What was there left for him as a human? His parents were leaving for London with or without him at the end of the school year and Danny was still his best friend, but he's been too busy with his new boyfriend to spare a single thought about Jackson's whereabouts. There was nothing for Jackson if he shifted back, but here in wolf form, he had everything he had ever wished for, and he wasn't going to give it up; unless it made Stiles happier, then maybe Jackson would reconsider.
Jackson was pulled from his thoughts when Stiles gently tapped the tip of his sensitive ears and looked up into Stiles's warm, brown eyes. "Jax, you okay buddy? You seem a bit distracted... But, I want you to know that I don't care if you choose to stay as a wolf, but please think of yourself. You don't really want to live the rest of your life like this, do you? I know you feel better staying like this, but nothing bad will happen if you decide you wanna change back, okay? There's no pressure to shift back, or stay like this, alright?"
Seeing the words fly in from one ear and out the other, Stiles caught Jackson's muzzle in his hands as he gently turned his head until they were eye to eye, making sure that the werewolf understood what he was saying. Jackson couldn't help but get lost in Stiles's eyes, glowing happily with all the attention the other was focusing on him as Stiles smiled and let Jackson go once he found the answer he seemed to be looking for in Jackson's eyes. Stiles couldn't help but grin wider as he realized how close the two had become ever since Jackson pranced home by Stiles's side that day.
The first couple days was Stiles awkwardly trying to get Jackson to leave, but gave up soon after. The next week or so Stiles had spent chatting with Jackson, pretending he was his friend, knowing that Jackson was going to leave eventually just like everybody else. Then Stiles had lost his sense of reality and somehow... Somehow Jackson had pulled him back down. When Stiles realized that Jackson wasn't going to leave him, he finally broke down into sobs in front of the werewolf who had just curled up into Stiles's arms that night as Stiles cried into his coat as he blabbered on about how he couldn't believe Scott had just given up on him and how much hurt and betrayal he felt; it was a rough day for Jackson too. And when Jackson was still in Stiles's bed the next time they woke up, Stiles had finally given up on trying to distance himself from Jackson when he realized just how much he needed a friend and Jackson had been there for him. Granted he knew Jackson couldn't talk in this form, but he also knew that if Jackson hadn't wanted to be there then he would've left Stiles to his tears, but he didn't. And the two had soon fallen into a regular pattern of Stiles going to school, coming home to rant about Scott and the pack, preparing dinner and eating when Jackson kept nudging him to eat, and falling asleep with the wolf curled up in bed with him after crying out the last of his tears for the day and the cycle repeated. It wasn't even until recently did Stiles realize how much had changed within him and how Stiles felt happier whenever Jackson was around; how much the werewolf meant to him in the short time they had come together, and if he was being honest, Stiles wouldn't know what to do if Jackson just upped and left suddenly one day. It was a thought Stiles didn't like to think about, and while it's always sitting in the back of his head, waking up to Jackson in his arms every morning helps chase his fears away.
"Come on, let's go to bed. We can deal with my dad and everything else tomorrow since it'll be Saturday. We can go running too if you want, let's just hope the Alpha pack and Scott aren't around." Jackson nodded as he got comfortable onto the mattress, curling up in the space between Stiles's arms, huffing in content as his mate's hands found their way back to his ears, "Good night, Jax, sleep well."
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EDIT: REUPLOADED 10/04/20 (Ao3)