Chapter 21- Josie
“Harry hurry up” I said going over and pulling him by the arm to the car where the others were already sat waiting to go. Harry had decided he was hungry and went back inside to make a sandwich, of course that meant he had to make one for Niall as well so we were now running late to go to visit Josie in hospital.
“The Styles is here” Harry said sliding in next to me before we were driven off, we were once again in our disguises, as soon as we got into the private room at the hospital we were allowed to take them off.
“I can’t wait to meet the girl you’ve not stopped talking about” Liam said turning around from his seat and smiling at me, I had talked about her a lot I guess. I think it was because she was so inspirational and so cute!
“I’m sure you’ll love her as much as I do” I said, she felt like the baby sister I never had. Niall turned the radio up and ate some pretzels he’d pulled out from a pocket in the car, I shook my head and started to sing to that annoying song you can’t seem to get out of your head ‘Can’t say no’, although it was growing on me.
“Girls girls girls I just can’t say no, never see them coming I just watch them go” Harry sang purposely loud and out of tune, I nudged him with my elbow and he smirked and rubbed the spot on his arm I hit pretending it hurt.
“You two are like an old married couple” Zayn said smirking. Harry and I looked at each other before we burst out laughing, I don’t really know why but somehow we couldn’t stop laughing. Soon enough Niall began chuckling then everyone else seemed to follow suit shortly afterwards. When we arrived at the hospital we had just about stopped laughing although my stomach was now hurting and I was sure I had somehow managed to gain a six-pack!
“Lead the way flower” Louis said as we jumped out and I began to walk down the all too familiar halls of the hospital. I made my way to the private room and poked my head round the door to see Josie sat in the bed colouring in a picture from a drawing book.
When she heard me she looked up and grinned putting the paper on the cabinet next to her, the boys followed me in after and I could see her looking at each of them trying to work out which was which.
“Josie I’d like you to meet Liam” I said and Liam began to peel of his disguise, her face lit up in recognition and Liam went over to talk to her, I could tell Liam had already fallen for her charm.
“This is Niall” I said pointing the blonde who had begun to take his off too, he went over and hugged her, she squealed slightly which made the boys chuckle. Josie had told me that Louis was her favourite so I couldn’t wait to introduce them next; of course I hadn’t told Louis otherwise his ego would be too big to fit the room.
“Josie this is Louis” I said grinning eyeing her knowingly; she smiled widely as Louis revealed himself and went over to hug her.
“Great to meet you” he said and she nodded back. If she was able to, I think she would have jumped up and down on the bed but she was too frail to even do that.
“Next up its Zayn” I said and he took off the wig and straightened his hair back out before going over to Josie. Harry was stood by my side and I grinned at him as he watched her, his dimples were showing and I could see he was touched by her.
“Last but not least it’s Harry!” I said and he moved away removing his disguise while walking over to Josie. He gave her a hug and as she looked over his shoulder in my direction she gave me a nod and thumbs up making me giggle slightly.
“Thank you for coming” Josie said hoarsely now she had met all of them, we all sat around her bed and the boys talked to her making her giggle and squeal in excitement, it was great to see her so happy. Louis saw the picture she had been colouring and picked it up writing a message on it before scrawling his name and passing it around to the others who all did the same, I then took a photo of all of them together.
After an hour of excitement Josie’s eyes began to slowly droop, you could tell it had taken everything out of her and the boys decided to sing their hit song.
“You're insecure
Don't know what for
You're turning heads when you walk through the door
Don't need make up
To cover up
Being the way that you are is enough” Liam sang and she smiled slightly as her eyes closed, Harry took her hand as he began to sing the next bit.
“Everyone else in the room can see it
Everyone else but you” His voiced echoed around the room giving me goose bumps and when he saw me looking he winked making my cheeks flush slightly pink before the others joined in for the chorus.
“Baby you light up my world like nobody else
The way that you flip your hair gets me overwhelmed
But when you smile at the ground it aint hard to tell
You don't know
Oh Oh
You don't know you're beautiful” Josie had now fallen asleep so the boys finished the chorus before ending the song, even though she was fast asleep her lips were curled up slightly into a smile.
“Your right, she is adorable. I just wish there was something we could do to help her” Liam said and I smiled. Underneath her smile she was pale, her lack of hair indicated she was suffering from cancer and the IV in her hand added to sight you wish you weren’t looking at.
I’d met her brother Charlie and her mum when I had visited her last time and you could tell just how much it was affecting them, her mum seemed to always be frowning even when Josie was smiling and the glint in her eyes you expect to see wasn’t there. Her brother held her hand and smiled trying to be strong and comfort her but somehow you could see just how much he was hurting. She was five yet she was ultimalty dying. I hated even thinking about it; the way her eyes followed you. The way her smile lit up a room. The way she could speak like an adult even though she was only five.
Her mum had told me the Leukaemia had now got to the stage where they couldn’t do anything to improve her health, when she told me I couldn’t help but feel my whole body sink. I’m not sure she even knew herself just how bad her condition was which made it even worse that she was in the last stages of her life. I leant on Harry’s shoulder and a tear fell down my cheek as I looked at her vulnerable state, Harry saw wiping it away and pulled me closer to his chest. I couldn’t look at her, it hurt too much.
Harry let me sob against him as he just held me and whispered in my ear, the boys all looked over and joined in the hug not saying anything. The silence wasn’t awkward; it let us all think about the situation and comfort each other. Even though none of us were related to her it didn’t matter; anyone can make an impact your life.
The silence was broken by the machine attached to Josie suddenly beeping; I looked up alarmed and ran to her side taking her hand while Louis and Zayn ran out to get a doctor, not caring at that moment in time that they could be recognized. Liam and Harry stood rooted to the spot in alarm not knowing what to do, as I held her hand I murmured to myself asking someone. Anyone. To keep her going. For a miracle.
Dr Holt came running into the room followed by two nurses, Charlie and her mum, I wanted to stay with her but Harry told me it was best if we left them as a family while they tried to save her. Josie’s body seemed to look worse from when it had not long ago and I stood there in shock, how could she be smiling one minute then like this the next.
Harry took my hand as we walked out the room; he pulled up his hood as led me back to the car, where at that moment in time was the best place we could wait without getting mobbed. As I slid open the door the others were already sat looking at nothing in particular, I couldn’t help but think it could be me if the treatment doesn’t work. What would I do? How would I feel? I’ve never thought about dying, it’s not something you tend to think about when you’re a teenager; you just live your life and have no regrets.
Even though my eyes stung ready to let tears escape I couldn’t cry, I didn’t want to when there was still a slight bit of hope still in me. Why would she be taken when she’s the nicest, most inspirational girl I’ve ever met? As I sat there lost in my thoughts my phone rang, without looking at the caller ID I hit accept.
“Hello?” I said, my voice was frantic yet my mouth was dry.
“Daisy, I- I” It was Charlie. I’d given him my number in case he ever needed anyone to talk to. He was only sixteen and had the same eyes and features as Josie. You didn’t need to be there to know what state he was in right now, he was crying struggling to get the words out and I knew what that meant. She had lost her battle. She was gone. I bowed my head before speaking and the boys all looked at me wanting to know the news, I shook my head once and their faces dropped. Niall looked down, Zayn and Liam looked out the window and Louis and Harry were staring at inanimate objects in the car.
“Charlie, I’ll meet you in the café” I said and he managed to answer before hanging up. As soon as the conversation ended the tears fell like raindrops in a thunderous storm, I sobbed but wiped them away knowing I would have to look strong for Charlie. Harry leant over and kissed my forehead as I hopped out.
“You guys go home, I’ll call you when I’ve finished here” I said and they nodded, they looked like they needed some time alone and they couldn’t do that out in public. I walked back into the hospital and I couldn’t even look in the direction of her room, it would hurt too much. I turned the opposite way and headed to the small café on the children’s ward I’d been to many times before.
Sat there was Charlie, he looked paler than normal and his was leaning on the table playing with a necklace in his hands, as I got closer he looked up but showed no other emotion other than being distraught. I sat on the chair opposite and leant over pulling him into a hug. His arms wrapped around me and he let out a whimper, before I knew it he was crying and there wasn’t anything I could say to make his tears go away.
“Charlie I’m so sorry. Your sister was someone I can’t even describe because she was that amazing” I said and pulled away from him, he wiped his tears away and we sat down again.
“You know I never actually thought this would happen. I thought she would have all the treatment, get better then we could just be a normal family again. We haven’t done any normal family activities for ages, I can’t even remember the last time we sat down and ate a Sunday dinner together, and now we can’t even do that” Charlie said in realization and I tried to hold back the tears, all he wanted was to have a normal family life but he couldn’t do that- he hasn’t been able to do that- because of cancer.
“I know it’s hard Charlie, I know it hurts. But remember all the good times you’ve had with your sister, the times you’ve laughed, cried, fought. Remember those and think she’s in a better place. It might not seem that way but just think that she’s stopped suffering” My mum had spoken those words when my grandma had passed away and even though it still hurt I knew it was true. Charlie nodded and wiped away a stray tear.
“Yeah your right, it hurts like hell but at least she’s not hurting anymore. Thanks” he said, running his hand through his short blonde hair. I stood up and pulled him with me going to buy a chocolate smoothie for both of us, it wouldn’t help with the pain but it was a start making him feel better.
He showed me the necklace he was playing with, it was a heart with Josie’s initials on it, he told me it was her favourite necklace and she wore it all the time, it would be a piece that held him to her.
I stayed with Charlie for another hour trying to help before going with him back to his mum who looked in an even worse state than he did. She came over to me and pulled me into a hug, her mascara had run creating a dark smudge under her eyes but it didn’t matter.
“Daisy I want to thank you. Thank you for being her friend when she needed one and making her smile in her final hours by bringing the One Direction boys, I know how much she would have loved that” she said and I couldn’t help but let a tear escape.
“No, you don’t need to thank me. She was so inspirational, I wish you would have been there when she closed her eyes” I said truthfully. That was the bit that was tugging at me, the fact that she wasn’t there when she closed her eyes for the final time.
“Honey its fine. I was there when she took her last breathe” she said before chocking up, I hugged her one last time before walking out of the hospital. I didn’t feel like getting in a car so I decided to walk home, it wouldn’t take me too long and it gave me the chance to think about everything. The cool wind was refreshing as my thoughts ran over everything, the good, and the bad.
Even though Josie wasn’t able to beat cancer, I would. Her death may have been tragic and painful but it gave me the driving force to be determined to get rid of my own and do something else for families in similar situations. I would set up the Josie trust, to help others and to keep her memory alive.
A/N - I loved Josie, this was really sad to write! :(