It took over 3 weeks before we arrived to the Jing Province Valley. We rode in the carriage for days and then spent almost 2 week in a large ship at sea before we reached the Fa Port.
It had been a surprise to me how amazing the Fa Mansion was as sits at the edge of the mountain looking down at the massive Fa Port beside the sea. I quickly learned that Fa He Long's status in Jing Province isn't small. There were guards everywhere and dozens of servants and maids. Mother once mentioned that her father has close relationship with the royal family - but being young and naive, I didn't fully understand what that meant. Now seeing the Fa Estate for the first time, I understood.
"Li, take young miss to the Orchid Quarter. Make sure Wei Lan has proper servants at the quarter"
"Yes master" Li replied with a bow.
"Wei Lan, these few weeks must be tiring for you. Go on and have a proper rest"
I thanked grandfather before I quietly followed Li who lead the way through the large mansion with strange walls heights. There are areas with very tall walls and others with short walls. Although it was odd, it still looks balanced.
"Because of the position of the mansion, there are cliffs at several corners. The walls are design for security purposes. Young miss, after a few months living at the Fa Mansion, you will get use it"
I nodded and continued to listen as Li stop every so often to point out highlights of the mansion.
"This is the Orchid Quarter, and now, it belong to you young miss"
I stood at the beautiful wood double door with intricate carvings of orchids. When Li opened the doors, I was struck by orchid scent. Inside, I saw the small lovely garden. In the center of the garden is a small white stone table with 4 small matching stools. Right behind the garden stood a small but lovely house. Again, every door and wood frame had intricate carving of different orchid flowers.
"Mother living quarter"
Li nodded with surprised that I knew this quarter use to be inhabited by mother.
"Young miss, I will have several maids bring water for your bath before your meal and rest"
"Thank you Li... please send my regards to grandfather as well"
Li bowed before he left the quarter, closing the door after behind him. Alone, I stood in the garden studying the well-kept quarter. It was clear that mother was well loved. Even after she had left, grandfather still kept everything in order as if letting his daughter knows that she will always have a place in his home. That realization moved my heart.
The first few weeks living at the Fa Mansion, I spend my time reading father's journals. Before, I had relied on third uncle for everything. I trusted him to provide me a home. Thinking back on it, what was truly given to me was a temporary place to live. They took care of me because they needed my titled. Now, I understood nothing in this world is free. Being born in a wealthy or noble family, if you are not smart, you will be taken advantage of. Children - the most vulnerable creatures are the easiest to fool.
"Wei Lan"
I was in the garden studying father's journal when grandfather voice was heard. Immediately, I put the book down and stood up to greet him with a bow.
"Grandfather, good morning"
I hadn't seen him since we arrived to the Jing Province. I figured it was because he had a lot of work he needed to do. After all, he had gone for several weeks for his daughter and son-in-law funeral; and despite the grief, he still have the responsibility to his own home. And I knew the people in his home depend greatly on him. The thought made me respect the older man more.
"This tea pot..."
Grandfather noticed mother's beautiful crystal jade tea pot.
"It belongs to mother" I explained. "Mother always makes father tea with it"
"Yes" I saw the old man's eyes soften as he gazed at the pot. "It was Su Lan favorite..."
I realized then that the pot had probably been grandfather's gift to mother.
"Grandfather, would you care to have some of Wei Lan's tea? Wei Lan skill is far from mothers, so Wei Lan hopes grandfather won't mind..."
When the elegant old man gave a soft smile and sat down, I quickly turned and prepared the tea. I watched mother make tea for father as a child and remembered her art in tea making. Mother's way of making tea had always shown her elegance and thoughts of love for father. Carefully pouring the old tea down the jade tray, over the cups that was still placed down, I removed all the old leaves inside and placed it in a jar. I poured clean water that was in a sealed glass jar into the pot. The water must be boiled several times. My mother had always only use the cleanest, purest water for her tea. I would do the same.
"Grandfather, please have a cup"
After a while, the tea was ready and I poured the tea into the 4 small cups. I set one down in front of grandfather before stepping back to my spot across from him. I watched him quietly as he brought the tea to his nose to smell the sweet fragrant before drinking it. When I saw his small smile, I was relieved. Without words, he placed the small cup back on the tray and took a second cup. After he took the fourth cup, I quietly refilled the cups.
"These books" Grandfather suddenly asked while drinking his tea.
"They're father's journals... Wei Lan never tries to study father's teaching... only after his death does Wei Lan understood her grave mistake..."
"Child, I understand that you still grieve for your parent's death, but you must not blame yourself constantly. It's no way to live"
"Wei Lan understands..."
"Sit"
I had been standing the entire time, so without another word, I sat.
"You've been here for several weeks now... Grandfather has been busy so I wasn't able to come see how you were doing."
"I'm well, thank you grandfather"
"Li told me you did not want anyone to serve you"
I was quiet.
"You are a young lady, from a reputable family no less; you should have several maids to serve you. I do not want you to feel any different than when your parents were alive"
I saw that the tea cups were empty again so I reached for the pot and refill the tea.
"Thank you Grandfather, Wei Lan understands grandfather's concern, but you do not need to spoil Wei Lan... Wei Lan doesn't deserve to be spoil"
The mature words coming out of a 10 years old child startled Fa He Long.
"This is grandfather's home, Wei Lan, although is your granddaughter, she is still a guest in grandfather's home... mother would be upset if Wei Lan does not act accordingly"
"You are still a child. Why do you have such thoughts, I am your grandfather, it is within my rights to spoil you"
Unconsciously, I smiled because of his serious, honest words. I hadn't even noticed that grandfather was also smiling when he saw my expression.
"Thank you grandfather... Your words are enough for Wei Lan"
"I will order several skilled maids for you"
"Grandfather, it is not necessary"
"It seems you are stubborn like your mother"
That made me smile again.
"Why do you refused having servants at your side? Being a young lady, it's only proper... Unless you prefer to have your old servants, in which, I could send some people back to the Zhou to retrieve them"
"Grandfather, please do not misunderstand, Wei Lan meant no disrespect" I didn't want him to think that I prefer the Zhou servants over the Fa's. "Wei Lan only wants to learn to live independently."
Again, my words seem to startle the old man.
"When father and mother were alive, Wei Lan was spoil and naive... only now, after Wei Lan is an orphan, does she understand the harsh reality, that one day, she will be alone..."
Suddenly, a rush of sadness came into my heart. The past memory flooded my mind - of my two-face uncle, his family, and Hou Rong.
"Wei Lan wants to be stronger" I said with shaky voice. "Wei Lan has to be stronger... So that when Wei Lan is alone, she will not be afraid"
"Good child, really, you are much like your father and mother... This grandfather is pleased." Grandfather smiled and patted my head gently. "From now on, you can live as you desire. Grandfather will be your support"
"Wei Lan thanks grandfather"
Knowing that grandfather accepted me was enough to ease my heart. As I buried the past memory inside my soul, I swore to myself that I will not be weak. I will learn to live on my own. I will train my body to be stronger so that it could support my damaged heart. I won't sacrifice myself for others. I won't do things for others. I will do things for myself. Most importantly, I will not lose myself to love. I will never give my heart to someone only to be betrayed. I will never give up my dignity - myself respect, in order to love. In this second chance of life, I won't have love as my priority again.