Disclaimer: This chapter adds on after the 35th chapter, Nathans POV has nothing to do with the actual story, i just wanted write a dry hump scene lol!
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What an adventure. We get into the red van, my dad driving us all back home with a cheerful atmosphere in the car. It's not like I'm not happy about my upcoming change but I'm still so scared of something going wrong during the surgery. I can tell people that there are more positive aspects than negative all I want but in the end I will still be just as terrified as when Dr Sheppard first told me about this operation.
I continue to play with Nathan's hand during the ride back home, squeezing and stretching his fingers, probably hurting him a few times but even so he keeps still and watches me closely, offering me his second one as well. Smiling, I break the fingers on that one as well, earning a chuckle from my boyfriend and an irritated glance from my sister sitting next to me.
The car comes to a halt in our driveway and the flock spreads out, exiting the vehicle and one by one stepping into the cool house. My mom gets us something to drink, also asking if we're hungry or not and offering to make us something to eat. I for once am not so I just shake my head and lead Nathan into the living room where Alex is already sitting with her gaze on her phone and a small smile making her bite her lip to hide it. I bet she's texting with Mika and while I'd love to tease her about that, I know for a fact that I behaved the exact same way when I got to know Nathan. Maybe not at the actual beginning but sooner or later I enjoyed writing with him.
My boyfriend sits down next to me and soon my parents join each one of them carrying four glasses of apple juice and placing them in front of us and or mother. "So Sky, did you listen to what the Dr Sheppard explained?", my dad asks, waiting for me to finish taking a sip from my drink. "Yeah, I did. I understood everything and I'm ready to do this. I just don't understand why I have to stay there for so long and then two days before the actual surgery.", I shrug with a small smile. "Maybe Because they...", my mom pauses, thinking for a second, "Yeah You're right, that doesn't make sense but let's not question it, okay? Let's just be glad that you are able to do this so soon.", I nod at her statement, placing a hand on Nathans thigh, making him look at me.
"Let's go upstairs.", I suggest, carefully grabbing a hold of his wrist. "Of course.", he gets up with me and we leave the living room with a quick 'later'. I switch to holding his actual hand, our finger intertwining as we make our way upstairs and into my room. Flopping face down onto my unmade bed with a groan. All of this is really draining my energy!
Suddenly a hand traces over my back and the mattress dips down, my boyfriends body sitting down next to me. "I'm so distressed!", I mumble as I turn around, his hand slipping over my side and resting onto my stomach. "I believe it! I wish I could calm you down a bit.", he rolls me over before laying down next to me, his arms pulling me closer to his heat radiating body. "I think you're doing a great job already.", I admit, nuzzling into the crook of his neck and smiling at the familiar scent surrounding me.
He leans away from me so I can have a better view of his lips as he starts forming words directed at me. "Can you close your eyes for me? I promise I won't do anything.", he somewhat demands, a small smile lightening his face up. "Uhm... okay.", I close my eyes, waiting for what might come next. The arms wrapped around me disappear and it takes every ounce of discipline to keep my eyes shut. The feeling of not having sight nor hearing is terrifying and it does kinda still remind of that incident.
Shivering, a finger suddenly traces over lips and even though I know it's Nathan, I still flinch away for a split second before slowly easing into it.
The finger starts running down my chin, swirling over my throat, soon an entire hand rubbing over it. I squeeze my eyes shut tighter, slightly scared of what he's planning on doing next. He's not going to choke me, is he? "Nathan,what-", I stop when his hand continues its trail over my collarbones before disappearing again. What is he doing?
A touch on my right knee causes me to jolt in surprise but keeping my eyes shut just like he had ordered. The hand keeps advancing my upper body along my inner thighs making me shiver, maybe even tremble, even though the friction wasn't even that much. Adding to that, there's a sudden wetness on my neck and I can't help but moan as he starts to suck carefully. I moan, the sensation even more ecstatic than with sight. Is this what he was hoping for?
I lean my head back to allow him better access but also trying to concentrate on the other touch which is still caressing my leg. This feels good, this is nothing much but even so I enjoy it. Which might be the reason I started to pout when both his hand and mouth disappeared and he nudges my arm. I open my eyes and stare up at him, shocked at the overly emotional face looking down at me, a hint of tears stinging in his beautiful eyes.
"W-what's wrong?", I sit up, placing my hand on his cheek, smiling when he leaned into my touch.
"Baby, do you remember that time in Claires basement? When the light went out?", he asks to which I nod, biting my lower lip at the memory of that embarrassing panic attack in front of him. "I never though you'd trust me without your sight but you even let me touch you. You can't even imagine how much this means to me, Sky. I feel honored that you are so comfortable with me.", he grins, wider than ever before.
"I... I never thought about this that way. I guess... I just really love you.", I blush at my own words and at the expression on his face. "God, you're adorable! I don't even deserve such an awesome person like you!", he draws me in for a hug, his lips soon finding one for a breathtaking kiss. Literally. The way his tongue moved against mine, his hand at the back of my hand leaving me no chance of escape, not like I would want to anyway.
We part due to the lack of oxygen, both of us panting slightly as we look at each other. "I love you and I'm so happy I got to know you, even though I was an asshole the first time we talked.", he admits, guilt furrowing his brows a tiny bit. "I love you too! And I forgive you for being an asshole.", I joke, pecking his lips twice, always pulling back before he had a chance to deepen it. "How generous!", we both laugh, laying back down on my bed and cuddling.
Nathan left to get some stuff from his place so he can sleep over, which meant we will be spending the entire day tomorrow until I have to go the hospital later on in the evening. So we both stayed up super long, watching three movies, one of which in the living room with my family and the other two upstairs on my laptop, snuggled up on my bed with the blankets covering each others hands as we explore our bodies every once in a while. I love how comfortable I am with him, with him touching me and with me touching him. It doesn't bother me anymore, not one bit when his warm hand traces over my chest or thighs or when his sweet, rough lips leave hickeys on my neck which I will most likely have to cover tomorrow. I just really love this guy!
The morning came soon and even though we wanted to sleep until around lunch time but sadly, my sister and mother dearest decided to wake us up for breakfast since,apparently, this is an important day. The last breakfast with my deaf son/boyfriend/ brother. Awesome if only I had more than 4 hours of sleep. Nathan on the other hand looked fine, not even a tad tired!
But 6pm was right around the corner as Nathan and I started to pack my suitcase. Honestly, I can't even believe this is happening! I'm going to go to the hospital to get my hearing back, to actually be able to hear the world, my friends, my boyfriend, my family and my surroundings. This is insane and I'm glad Nathan is here to help me because I'm quite shaky due to the excitement and slight anxiety and his occasional kisses and hugs are really all I need to keep my calm with all of this going on.
Claire came over as well, to check on what I have packed and how I'm holding up. After she had approved of the items in my bag we were all set to go! "Do you want to drive with me?", she asks the two of us and we just nod, my parents and sister getting into my dads silver Audi while we get in with Claire who took off before even waiting on them. Which should be fine though since we all know the way to the hospital and it's not even that long of a drive.
I'm shaking like a leaf when her car came to an halt in front of the huge white building and not even Nathans tight grip around my hand could make me feel any better. My lips are bleeding every five minuets because I keep biting them. My hair is a mess as well from the constant running a hand through it.
"Sky, calm down you look like you're about to have a panic attack. Are you okay?", she asks as we stand on the parking lot waiting for the rest of our flock to arrive.
"U-uhm... yeah...I don't know.", I whisper, trying to ignore my fast beating heart and try to grasp the thoughts that keep on flying through my head and making me dizzy. "-at me. Look at me.", Claire positions herself right in front of me and soon switches to signing instead of talking.
"It's okay. you're going to be fine.", she signs with a reassuring smile, nodding as I try to regulate my breathing which was all over the place. Don't panic!Don't panic! You're going to be okay, like she said.
"Good! You're doing a good job!", she signs, opening her car door and making me sit on the driver seat with my legs still on the ground."Take a deep breath.", I do as I'm told, or rather signed and give it my best at calming my tensed muscles which won't stop to squeeze my chest together.
"Good! Now hold it at the top.", she instructs but I can't. I can't hold it and instead start what I hate most. Hyperventilating and panicking at the loss of control over my own body and mind. I force myself to blankly stare ather hands, trying to focus on what she's actually telling me to do. Claire kneels down in front of me, placing both of her hands on my thighs and rubbing them gently, she doesn't talk anymore nor does she sign she just smiles and takes deep breaths for me copy. I try to hold the same rhythm as her, the thoughts slowly slowing down just like my breathing.
I shut my eyes and just concentrate, ignoring my surroundings, ignoring the people in front of me and ignoring the reason I'm here. I hate this! I hate being so vulnerable and reacting with a panic attack to every little thing!This has to end!
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Helloooooooo! Have you missed me?! I sure missed you guys! Sorry for not updating though, that was kinda mean but at least I uploaded a new book. Yes! An entirely new book with new characters and relationships and things happening and just lots of blood! And I'm not talking about period blood lol! Anyway, please do check it out, I'd really appreciate it! Thank youu! 😊😍❤️