Chapter 38: I choose you Gweneviere! (This isn’t Pokémon you know)
“Sir, I picked up your hair for you.” I said placing the long strip of hair on his desk.
My principle sat behind his awesome looking chair, with his head in his hands not able to look at me.
“Miss Matthews, I done think you understand. It has taken me almost my whole life to keep my hair to this glory.” He said and I rolled my eyes, so dramatic!
“Uh.” Was all I could say, “I must say. It was beautiful hair.” I said and he made a horrible noise, that resembled a cat being sat on (how would I know what a cat that got sat on sounded like…I have never sat on a cat, okay it was by accident guys! It was just there and it looked a lot like a furry cushion, it’s not my fault it was fat and took the shape of a fluffy cushion).
“Well, there is nothing I can do miss Matthews it seems you will have to be expelled for wielding a dangerous weapon, you could have snipped my ear off.”
“What, wait? Scissors aren’t dangerous. I mean they are if you run with them.” I said blabbing standing up.
He can’t just expel me! Well, he can but that’s not the point! “Can’t you just give me a warning or something?” I asked, what would Aunt June say? What would Taylor say? What would Rodger say? Well, he wouldn’t do much but still.
“Please leave through that door and see Mrs. Fanny.”
“You can’t call a staff that!” I shouted at him, this man is too rude!
He looked up at me, most probably shocked at my outburst. He smiled at me, his cheeks had turned a shade of red..
“That’s actually her name?” I asked, staring at him my mouth wide.
“Serious.” Who has there last name Fanny?
“That must have been an awkward interview.” I laughed at the images of the interview.
“You don’t even want to hear the half of it.”
I sat back down in the chair and stared at my principle, he seemed to get the message that were in for some serious story telling.
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“Ha Ha.” I smacked my hand against my thigh, tears streaming down my face.
So far he had told me that when he first met Mrs. Fanny he had accused her of faking her name. He even told her off for using such a horrible name. He soon had to give her a job when her name was proven to be Fanny. He also told me about the time where he had joked about her having a café.
“Ha Jenny’s Fanny, what a classic name!” I slapped my thigh and shook my head.
“Ha did I tell you about the time where I had to go around and pen tap everyone and guess what I said?” he said, his eyes shining.
I nodded smiling.
“Mrs. Fanny can I tap you?”
“Phaaaaaaaa! Sir you are just too funny!” I said my head on the table.
Has anyone told you how cool my principle is? He’s fricking awesome.
“Did you call me?” Mrs. Fanny chose that particular to come in, we both burst out laughing.
“Ah Mrs. Fanny I would like you to meet-“
“Hi,” I said getting up and offering my hand to her “I'm Mr. Willy.” She pulled her hand back from mine, Sam and I laughed. Yeah, I found out the principles name is Sam Higgins.
“This is Gweneviere Matthews she may” Yes ‘may’ have I ever told you how much I love that word? “Be expelled will you please call her guardian.”
“Mr. Higgins, what happened to your hair!” she said dropping her files on his desk and brushing past my legs to get to him.
Uh, rude much?
“There was a slight incident earlier.” He said as if it was no big deal. “Could you please arrange a meeting with Gweneve-”
“Gwen.” I filled in for him; he looked at me and smiled.
“Gwen’s guardian-”and for the second time in under 3 minutes I cut him off.
I know, I'm rude.
“Wait, didn’t I tell you that I have a second degree in hairdressing?” I said standing up grabbing the scissors of the desk.
The truth? I have no clue how to cut hair, I lied. You would do the same if you were about to get kicked out of the school.
“I was skilled from a young age; I was doing a course back in England before I left.” Lie, lie, and lie, “Please let me sort it out for you. I know the perfect hairstyle that that will bring out your face and knock of years. Mrs. Higgins will be very pleased.” I said working my way in. I smiled showing my teeth.
Ha, I had no clue what I was going to do. But I had to attempt it, maybe I should just cut it off and do a runner?
“Really?” he asked and I nodded.
“Of course!” I said, maybe I did that with a little too much energy.
He watched me and sat back in his chair. He motioned with his hand and I made my way over to him.
“Do a good job.”
“So if I do this you won’t expel me?” I asked.
“I also have another think to ask of you.” As he spoke he glanced at Mrs. Fanny. Phaaa, I can’t get over saying her name it’s just too funny.
I placed my butt on his desk, sending pencils everywhere. I shrugged leaving them.
“Shoot.” I told him.
“After you have done my hair.”
“What? No fair!” I pouted, when he dint budge, I grabbed the scissors and proceeding to the back of his head.
Time to chop, chop, chop!
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There was snakes on the floor, tell a lie, it was Mr. Higgins hair. I had hacked away and now it was to the nape of his neck. Yeah, it was really was longer than that, down past his shoulders.
Right now to…chop!
Ah, that was way to short!
Why, what did I do to deserve this? I had Mrs. Fanny watching me and I think I had created a pool of sweat on the floor.
“Gel,” I said out loud “Anybody got any gel?”
And what do you know Mrs. I love my Fanny has some gel. Wait, what did I just say?
“Thank you.” I said dumping my fingers in the pot.
“Thank you Mrs. Fanny for letting me dunk my fingers in your gel.” I said smiling, my smile soon dropped when I realized what I had said.
I looked at Mr. Higgins, his eyebrows’ where raised and he looked like he wanted to die of laughter.
“You really need to change your name.” I told Fanny. Yeah, I'm calling her Fanny from now on.
“Well immature people need to grow up if they find it funny.” She said.
I went back to doing Sam’s hair.
“Mature people need to let out there farts and relax.” I whispered to my headmaster.
He choked on his mug of tea he was drinking and I snickered. Mrs. Fanny gave us both a look and went back to the folders she was going through, every once in a while she would mutter out loud to herself.
“Miss Matthews, I have heard that there is some rivalry between you and Stacy-Amy?” Mrs. Fanny said looking up from her folders. I looked at her over Sam’s head.
“Yeah, I guess.” I shrugged and my eyes went wide when I nearly snipped his ear of. Sam became stiff, “That was my finger.” I assured him, he didn’t relax.
Smart man.
“Is there a particular reason for this?” she asked, I didn’t shrug. Just in case I did cut his ear off.
“Because I'm dating Kyle.” I said as if it was no big deal.
Ding, ding. I can hear a light bulb in my head. Kyle wouldn’t let me get expelled. Or would he?
“As in Kyle Reece?” Sam said. I stopped him when he went to turn to look at me.
“Yeah…” I drifted off, too focused on a piece of hair that looked lost (how can a piece of hair looked lost, you ask. I have no clue, it just did okay.) I combed back his hair so it was all nice and neat looking
“Ta dah!” I said. I stepped back to admire my handwork.
“Well I do say, those courses sure paid of Gwen.” Fanny said and I frowned at her.
“What courses- oh the hairdressing they sure did.” I smiled. Way to go Gwen. Get yourself expelled for lying as well.
Man, I'm such a boob sometimes.
All I had done was snipped his hair and then gelled it back and when he has a shower and dries it he will notice how short I have actually cut it.
Shush!!
“So about the second thing you wanted to talk to me about.” I said and sat down back on his desk.
“There is a chair there.” He said and I shrugged. Why is it when your comfy people always want to move you?
“Well, as you know there is a play coming up.”
“Romeo and Juliet.” I said and he nodded.
I watched as he twirled a pen lid his eyes focused on me.
“Well as you know, students are not feeling the excitement of it all. And if we don’t have actors the show will have to be cancelled.”
“Your point?” I said, why is it my lip is twitching?
“Gweneviere Matthews I choose you as our Juliet!” he pointed at me and smiled as if I was meant to jump up and down with excitement.
“Yeah, I would rather get expelled.” I stood up of the desk and grabbed my bag.
“No Gwen wait!” he said grabbing my arm “Think about this, you’re well known and if you do the show I know other people will come forth to help. I'm not begging you Gwen, I'm telling you.”
“That’s not very nice.” I hate being told what to do. And are you guys hearing what they want me to do? They want me to play a firkin main part in a firkin play. Not only that it’s a sad love story, and I don’t need any of that right now.
“It’s your choice Miss. Matthews either play or you walk out of here with no education.”
“I have education,” here comes the speech “One, I can read the alphabet and I can even spell it backwards. Take skill I know. Two, what where calculators made for? To calculate large sums! Three, I have a phone which has spell check and a calculator. Would you look at that? A whole education in a little piece of technology!” yeah, I stepped over that line.
“Gwen.” He said his voice booming.
“Wah hey big man, belt it!” I said and gave him a serious face, “Do I have a choice.” It wasn’t a question.
“No.” was all he said.
When I said my principle is cool, I take it back…he’s okay-ish. Yeah, my new word, don’t go stealing it now.
“You may go.” He said and I stuck my tong out at him. Man, how I wish I can get a boulder to sit on him.
My hand was on the door knob (Fanny, Willy, Boob and Knob what is wrong with the world today?) when Sam called my name.
“Yes.”
“I want you to find a Romeo.”
“Oh my god!” I growled “You want me to find a Romeo as well.”
“Not an ugly one.” Fanny said.
“That’s rude.” I told her, she wasn’t to take a look at herself, ha and her name.
“Go.”
“I'm going…I'm going to go find my Romeo!” I said and I made an extra effort to slam the door.
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HAPPY EASTER EVERYONE! Didn’t I just say that? Who care hope everyone is stuffing themselves silly, because at the moment I feel like a beach whale < awkward moment where I forgot how to spell whale) anyway, I hope everyone has a brilliant day. And if you don’t do Easter happy reading time instead!