"I'm gonna kill him."
"I think this bruise makes me look badass." I said as I looked at myself in the small mirror. I set the small mirror down on my lap, and watched my brother pace back and forth in front of my hospital bed."I don't understand why they brought me in here. I'm completely fine. Just a bruise." I shrugged, placing my hand over my jaw.
"That fucking asshole punched you. He punched you!"
"Yes. We went over this, Geoffrey." I rolled my eyes, throwing my head back against my not-so-soft pillow."Where's Camila?" I asked him, hoping it would distract him.
"She's on her way." He mumbled, waving his hand dismissively as he continued pacing."When I see him, I'm gonna kill him."
"Did you tell her what happened?"
"Hell yeah I did!" Geoffrey shouted angrily, huffing, still pacing. I was starting to get dizzy because of his pacing, so I decided to close my eyes and rest a little.
But then the door opened, and I opened my eyes a little to see who it was. Camila stood there, an angry expression on her face with two men behind her. I furrowed my eyebrows, sitting up and looked at them weirdly.
"What's going on?"
"Well, I was on my way over here when they stopped and asked me if they could come in and question you." Camila explained, throwing her purse and jacket on the chair near my bed. She tied her hair up, looking frustrated and tired as she did.
"Questions for what?" I tilted my head a little.
"There were witnesses who saw the boy who punched you," One of the men started, stepping in front of Camila to be closer to me."But no one wants to answer questions. Now, your friends who helped you, they say to ask you because as the tall one said and I quote," He flipped his small notebook opened, then read the words he wrote."'Ask her, because I don't know if she wants to turn him in or not. I don't know what she would say...apparently I don't know her enough because she doesn't trust me to know the most important thing to happen in your life happened.'"
He cleared his throat awkwardly, then flipped his notebook shut.
My lips twitched a little, a humorless chuckle escaping my lips as I laid back on the bed. Dinah. Sounds just like her.
"I'm not pressing charges." I shook my head at myself, crossing my arms over my chest as I saw the shocked the expressions past my brother and sister's faces. One of the two men nodded, the other one seemed unsatisfied, like he knew something I didn't. So I decided to point it out."What?" I looked right at him.
He shrugged."This boy hit you. He punched you." I nodded, a little hesitant because I was getting confused."What if he hits another girl, thinking it's fine because you didn't press charges?"
"I don't know." I answered, knowing it wasn't one anyone wanted to receive. I huffed at him when he shook his at me, rolling my eyes, uncrossing my arms.
"Very well then," The other man said, glancing at everyone in the room before clearing his throat."We will let you rest now." I huffed as a response, shaking my head as they both made their way out of my room.
"Can I go home now?"
"No." Camila and Geoffrey said together, and I mumbled under my breath as I slouched down.
Suddenly, the door opened again, and I thought it was the same two guys from earlier but then I saw my parents walking in with two other guys with scrubs on. I raised my eyebrow, sitting up excitedly because this meant I was going home. Right?
"Y/N, I'm glad to see you're okay." Some guy spoke up, and I just gave him a look that asked him who he was. He chuckled and said,"I'm your doctor. Dr. Pital, I was the one who made sure you didn't have anything wrong up here." He tapped my forehead with his pen, and I shook my head with my nose scrunched up. I don't remember that.
"Scans came out clear. You were just...out of it." He chuckled out, glancing down at my chart in his hand.
"Can I go home now?"
"This is Dr. Jennings." I moved my gaze over to the doctor with the light colored scrubs, curiously wondering why he had different scrubs on. My doctor then moved aside, allowing Dr. Jennings to stand beside my bed, closer to me.
"Hi. Once again, I'm Dr. Jennings and I'll be evaluating you."
I scrunched my nose up."Evaluating me? What the hell does that mean?" I looked over to my parents, who were watching me with worried eyes that only confused even more."What the hell is going on?" I asked more defensively, scooting away from the doctor.
"We just want to make sure you're okay. With you stepping in front of that man as if he wasn't going to hit you, we want to make sure you...didn't do it on purpose."
"On purpose?" I looked over to my siblings, who were just as confused as I was."Wait," I furrowed my eyebrows, it suddenly started making sense."You think I stepped in front of Leonard on purpose, that I wanted him to hit me because...you think I'm suicidal?"
"No. No. We don't think-"
As soon as he said we, I turned to look at my parents with a glare."You think I'm suicidal?" I huffed when they just continued to look at me with worried eyes."I was trying to protect Lauren. He would have hit Lauren if I didn't jump in."
"That's not what they are worried about. They are-"
"You, shut up," I glared at the doctor, who pursed his lips after my demand."They can speak for themselves." I muttered, looking over to my parents again."I'm not suicidal. I'm fine."
"Then why didn't you hit him back?" My father asked me, surprising me to say the least. I furrowed my eyebrows, tilting my head a little to the side."And your friend, Dorelys, said you were laughing. After he hit you, you were laughing."
"Pain is funny." I shrugged, then noticed how Dr. Jennings wanted to say something as soon as I said that."And he caught me by surprise." I added.
"But you knew," Camila spoke up, I looked over at her to find her frowning."You knew he would hit Lauren if you didn't step in, if he didn't hit Lauren he would have hit you. You knew something bad was going to happen either way."
"Come on, you can't seriously think-" I was cut off when I saw Camila shake her head, and I furrowed my eyebrows when she suddenly narrowed her eyes and took her phone out. She walked out of my room with her pressed her ear and an angry expression on her face. I scoffed, then turned my gaze to my brother."I'm not suicidal, Geoffrey. I'm fine."
He nodded carefully, then walked over to me and said,"I just think...honestly speaking, Leonard isn't even that big of a guy and isn't even that strong. You can easily beat the shit out of him...if you wanted to." He added, and I pushed him away from my bed and shook my head.
"I'm not suicidal!" I shouted, looking at them with glare."I was protecting Lauren. If this is what people think when you try to help someone from getting hurt, then I would never have helped her."
I saw my parents exchange a look with Dr. Jennings, and I scoffed when I realized this wasn't up to me. I was seventeen. And my birthday was in a month. I huffed as I laid back with my eyes closed, hearing my doctor's words after.
"We'll be keeping you here for a couple of days, just to make sure everything is okay."
*
M
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C
Y
*
"She doesn't want to see me, does she?"
The Latina avoided my eyes, staring at the cards in her hands as she did. She hummed quietly as she checked her cards, then placed two red threes on top of the pile. And finally met my eyes after she did, a frown on her lips as she shook her head gently.
"She's just upset, you know?" Dorelys started, and I released sigh as I put one red four on top of her cards."She's upset you didn't tell her. She thought you trusted her enough to tell her things like that."
"I knew how she would react." I mumbled, watching her put two draw-two cards on the pile."Seriously?" I muttered, and she shrugged with an apologetic look. I grabbed four cards from the other pile, then watched her put one red card on top of the pile.
"Uno." She mumbled, and I set my cards down with a huff.
"I hate this game." I muttered, then sat back on the bed. I looked around my room and huffed."I hate this hospital."
"Have they told you when you can get out of here?"
"No." I huffed, looking over to the flowers I received from Leonard's parents. They were dead now, and I was hoping someone would take throw it away before it reached that point.
"Well, lets talk about something else." Dorelys sat up, stacking the cards together as she continued."Josh asked me out on a date." She said with an excited smile.
I hummed."Not surprised. Kinda figured that dude liked you since day one." I shrugged, and she furrowed her eyebrows."You're oblivious to certain things, Rels."
"I'm oblivious, really Y/N?" I furrowed my eyebrows, looking at her questionably."I had the biggest crush on you when I first met you, did you know that?"
"Seriously?"
She nodded, a small laugh escaping her lips."Yes. But then you said you were in love with someone else. I couldn't get in the way of that." She told them, shrugging.
"You should have. Maybe it would have prevented...all of this." I raised my arms up to gesture to my hospital room.
"You love her, Y/N," I popped my eyebrows, my heart aching at that."Even if I did, I'm almost sure that you still would have done what you did for her. Maybe you wouldn't be in the hospital, because you would have beaten the shit out of him but you still would have done it because you love her."
"I'm not suicidal."
"I know." Dorelys rubbed my knee, smiling sadly at me."But you are depressed." I huffed, fucking future psychology major."And writing has been keeping you sane...so don't stop."
I furrowed my eyebrows."Is that why you did that whole reverse psychology thing the other day for that Poetry Out Loud thing?"
She nodded, then said,"I invited Lauren too." I opened my mouth to ask her why, but she answered before I could."I knew you needed to say those words to her. And she needed to hear you say them, because she needed to know where you stood."
"She used me, Dorelys."
"She's scared, Y/N."
"Bullshit." I scoffed, crossing my arms over my chest. What could she possibly be scared of?
"She told me to tell you she was sorry. For everything." I shook my head, looking away from the Latina's eyes. She sighed as she got off my bed, and I looked over at her to see what she would do."Sorry doesn't make up for everything, trust me; I know. But it's a start."
"Dinah would kill you if she heard you're taking Lauren's side. And my sister would too."
"I'm not taking her side. Or yours." I frowned, and she shrugged her shoulders."I'm taking the side of love. As sappy and cliche as it sounds. Because I believe things happen for a reason, including the things that cause heartbreak."
I tilted my head, questionably looking at her.
She chuckled, patting my leg."Everything that has happened between you and Lauren, what has it taught you?"
"You would be a great therapist." I commented, and she gave me a look to answer. Sighing, I did."That love fucking sucks."
"And..."
"And what? There's more?" I furrowed eyebrows, a frown on my lips.
"Yes. And you know what it is."
I huffed, crossing my arms as I felt a burning in my chest. Either heartburn or the aching of wanting to see if Lauren was okay. And I suddenly knew what more was. I scratched the back of my neck shortly, then scoffed before saying it.
"Even if after all this pain she has caused me," I sighed, looking down at my lap."I would still go back to her. And I'm wondering if she's okay now, because I love her. And I forgive her, for some reason." I breathed out, playing with the hem of the blanket.
"Sometimes your brain and heart don't agree when it comes love. Your brain is begging for mercy while your heart's...asking for more–that's heartbreak. There's no controlling that, or making any sense that either." She said with a shrug of the shoulders."I have to go." She sighed out, and I nodded knowing she had to because it was her lunch. She patted my leg as she grabbed her bag from the chair beside my bed."I'll bring your assignments for your next classes after. See you later."
"Dorelys," She stopped by the door, her eyebrows raised curiously."Thank you. And can you tell Dinah I'm sorry."
"Yeah." She smiled."I'll see you later."
When the door shut behind her, I laid back with a huff as I thought of what Dorelys said.
Your brain is begging for mercy, while your hearts asking for more.
Maybe it's the other way around. I didn't know. All I knew was, it didn't make sense, but it made sense. I huffed at myself, knowing that confusing myself wouldn't help me now. So I closed my eyes, and tried to get some sleep.
Sleep always worked.
________________\
As ridiculous this may seem, this actually happened to a friend of mine who isn't my friend anymore (things got complicated). I'm not going to get into much detail about her personal life so I'm leaving it at that.