“And your hearts against my chest, your lips pressed to my neck. And I’m falling for your eyes, but they don’t know me yet…” I sing in sync with the music playing in my ears, as I walk to the brick structure that I guess I should call home. I sing my favorite lyric again as the chorus comes up the second time and I adjust my ear buds so they fit comfortably again. I raise the volume, taking a deep breath as I continue walking on this usually cold Friday afternoon.
I managed to survive this week, and with every step I took in the school halls I looked down, ignoring all the other people who seemed to always try to fit in. I walked past them as I normally did, not even acknowledging them being there. All I do is move from class to class, trying to avoid any form of confrontation with anyone because normally, they would just call me a ‘loner’ or something along the lines of my family… But most of the time now people don’t think twice about saying something like that to my face after witnessing what I did to Andrea Sherman. Let’s just say that I had some choice words to say to her when she decided to cross the line, and my fist wanted to have a chat with her perky little plastic face.
I also managed to pass these days by without being approached by the walking Abercrombie advertisement. That was pretty hard to do since we have three classes together. Every time I would turn around in chemistry, Luke would be smirking at me, and I would just turn back around and wait for the day to be over. Ever since our little ‘meet’ if you would call it that, he’s been trying to talk to me. I’m used to people just making way through the hallway whenever I walk by. So I don’t understand why he’s been more obnoxious than he normally is to me.
I took the long way back ‘home’ from school. It just gave me more time to think I guess. But I just say that because I don’t really want to admit the real reason why. I don’t do it to think. I walk slower and walk a longer way because when I walk into that house and the immediate smell of vodka hits me, I’m ashamed, disgusted, and disappointed at who my mother is. I walk up the same block I’ve been walking up for the past 17 years. I head up the three concrete steps and walk up to the door, reaching in my book bag for my keys. “Why do you fucking care!?” I hear my mother’s voice yell from the inside of the house.
“Maybe because you’re my wife!” I hear my father’s voice exclaim back to her. I sigh, turning my key in the lock and opening the door. I drop my book bag on the empty spot on the floor right beside the door rather loudly, and neither of them bothers to look at me. I haven’t seen my dad in a week because he doesn’t want to have to deal with my drunken mother every morning so he spends most of the time away from the house
“Well maybe if you were more of a husband I wouldn’t do this!” She yells directly in his face. I could practically feel the heat rising in his blood as he glared back at her.
They kept going at it. Yelling pointless shit back and forth at each other, as I stood standing 7 feet away from them and they failed to realize it. “Why don’t you two, stop acting like fucking children and try and act like parents for once?!” I yell at them, tired of hearing all of the meaningless bickering. They stood there silent, staring at me, anger, frustration and shock filled both of their faces. I walked right through them, my shoulder pushing past them and I walk upstairs. I make sure to slam my bedroom door, hard enough for them to feel the hatred in my bones.
I drop onto my bed, face into my plush pillows, glad that I finally herd silence for once in my tragic life. I indulge in the quiet of my room for a few seconds, surprised it lasted this long. “You see what you’re doing! You behavior is reflecting on your daughter!” 7.3 seconds, well that was a new record... Until my mother’s voice that sounds of shattered glass breaks my peace as it normally does. With that, I’m left with hearting a continuous fight of harsh words being spat at one another downstairs.
Before I even realize it, half my body is out my window and I grip the bottom of my boot onto the roof of the garage, which is conveniently placed outside of my window. This made it easy to sneak out whenever I didn’t want to hear the confrontation between my parents that would happen pretty much every week for all my life. I carefully dangle my feet off the roof and jump the 7 foot decent onto the worn out grass on the side of my house. I fix my rolling stones tee, and shake my leather jacket until it fits comfortably again, and start walking.
Don’t ask why, I sure as hell didn’t... But in a matter of time I made it to his house. It wasn’t hard to find considering you can feel the pounding and hear the sound of the music from a mile away. Don't forget the fact that this stupid party is all people were talking about in school today. I don’t hesitate when stepping to his front door. I was just going to this stupid party to clear my head. Although, It’s kind of hard to stop thinking when you see drunk couples stumbling around the lawn of his huge house, whispering and pointing at you. I don’t bother saying anything to them; they might just be surprised that I can talk.
I walk up to his door and before I even decide whether I’ll knock or ring the doorbell, the door swings open. I’m caught slightly by surprise, not expecting anyone to open it. And I immediately recognize those eyes and that stupid smirk.
“Hey! I knew you’d come back for me baby.” He says, grinning as he normally does. Oh god, what have I just gotten myself into tonight.