"Alright, that was great," The producer said once Lauren finished singing her verse in the booth.
"Actually, can I re-do it? I feel like I hit the note a little too low in some of them," Lauren asked.
"It was actually perfect, but sure." The producer replayed the song so that she could re-do it. Just from my peripheral vision, I could see Lauren was nervous as she non-stop ran her hand through her hair; a telltale sign I picked up years ago that she was indeed nervous.
We had spent about 12 hours and counting in the studio, brainstorming ideas for the music and alternating some of the lyrics to fit with the melody. We arrived at around 9am and we worked through the day, only to stop to eat and rest.
We had decided to add a lot of musical instruments in the mix but still has that capability to move the listeners by the sense of sadness and rawness of the song.
The producer we were working with is probably the easiest and chillest one out there. I've known him since last year when I started my album and I thought that he could help with this one too.
And I was right.
Feeling the need to calm Lauren down, I walked over to the systems in front of the booth and held the button so Lauren could hear me, "Lauren, you really don't have to push yourself, just relax."
"I know, it's just... It's nerve-wracking, you know? I've been in this business for quite some time and I know what to do, but this feels different. Because now, it's a song that we've personally written. So I want it to be perfect."
"Yeah.. I know, I was like you when I first started. It's odd singing for yourself, singing a song you've written by yourself, isn't it?"
She nodded in response.
"How about..." I said, pondering over what to suggest, "we take a break for 5 minutes? We can just chill for a while."
Before she could deny my offer, I walked over to the door beside me and opened the door for her to walk out. She didn't answer but accepted my offer by walking out of the booth to the couch and slumped down.
While we were sitting and talking aimlessly to calm her nerves, my manager and a few representatives from my label walked into the room, just adding the nervousness back up.
They stride over to us with stoic facial expressions, making me nervous at each step they took, silently chewed on my fingers while I anxiously anticipating what they were about to say.
It could be because of what Dua and I did yesterday, acting all couple-y and all.
After the event ended yesterday, my twitter notifications had gone through the roof, making my phone app crash once in a while. At one point, our name trended worldwide. Dua was ecstatic and said that it was a job well done while I was scared shitless of what the label might do in response to my somewhat rebellious behavior.
The media had also taken it into account, publishing news after news of what might be happening between us. There were some, however little, who were pretty rational - or ignorant if you prefer - that had said that it was probably a scheme to promote our song we had collaborated upon.
Although there were tons of rumors going around, surprisingly, there weren't any negative ones. All of them showered me with supports if I were to 'swing the other way' because after all, Dua and I looked like a hot couple.
"Camila," Roger started, waking me from my train of thoughts, "We had a few meetings with Fifth Harmony's label and their management about the song and everything."
"We still think that it's a great idea, but we have another proposition," a woman in a white silky blouse and pencil skirts asserted, walking forward as if demanding both our attention.
"We have decided that after the end of the first leg of your tour, we want to sort of fuse Fifth Harmony and your concerts. They're about to start their tour after their album is released at the same time the second leg of your tour is starting. So then, if you decide to add this song to the setlist, Lauren could come and sing along with you. Neither of you guys are the opening for the other, because both Fifth Harmony and you will be headlining the tour. Like the Justin Timberlake and Christina Aguilera one time a decade ago or the Demi and Nick Jonas one."
"So what do you think?" Roger asked once they were done explaining, "We already asked the girls from Fifth Harmony, excluding you Lauren, and they thought it was a great idea. So we just need both your approval before we start to inform it publicly. Of course there's gonna be some legal actions like signing NDAs and stuffs but we'll handle that when the time comes."
By the time Roger stopped, Lauren and I instantly gazed at each other, a smile creeping up on both our faces, only to look back at Roger.
"Yes!!!"
***
"Are you going back to your hotel immediately after this?" Lauren asked once we were inside the car, the driver in front while we both sat at the back.
It was around midnight now and we had finally finished the song. We hadn't fully listened to the song since the producer was still perfecting it but we would be able to get something sometime this week.
We were sharing the car since it made sense. Lauren's hotel was near mine and it would save gas and ergo, save the world from the global warming; at least that's my excuse anyway. In truth, I just wanted to be with her, even if it's just for a short while.
"Yeah, probably."
"Well, do you wanna join me binge watch TV shows back in my hotel room?" She asked, surprising me by her question. I know that I like having her company, I just didn't know that she reciprocated how I felt.
"Would Lucy mind?" I asked, playing with my fingers by entangling it on my lap.
"Why would she mind?"
"Well, considering you're both engaged, it's likely for you guys to share a room together," I explained, trying hard not to sound bitter about it. Just the idea of them together in the same bedroom, doing God knows what, makes my heart clench painfully. I mean, I know for a fact that they've done it, obviously, but it still doesn't lessen the pain I have to endure every time I think about it.
"Oh... No, yesterday after the KCAs, she had a flight back to New York, she didn't even touch the bed since she came here the same day the KCAs were on," she assured, smiling softly at me.
"Well then, I guess it's alright." Silence filled the air for a second before I asked. "Is it gonna be American Horror Story? Cause I can't if it is."
"Honestly, I was thinking of Friends for a minute there, but I think you're onto something," she teased, tapping her index finger on her chin repeatedly as a mean of thinking, looking up to emphasize that she's brainstorming. "Heh, we'll see.."
***
"Lauren, I fucking hate you," I groaned, pulling the sheets to my face to cover my face with it as the show started. Even the intro for the show makes the back of my neck tingle. I was in the toilet whilst Lauren picked what show to watch.
Clearly, the trip to the bathroom was a mistake.
"What why?" She questioned innocently, chuckling softly as my body shook from fright.
"Why do we have to watch American Horror Story? We can literally watch anything. Anything..."
"But it's starting.. I mean, you can leave if you want. You know where the door is," she laid back, making herself comfortable on the bed with a teasing smile plastered on her face, knowing that I wouldn't go out because the show had started and I'm too much of a chicken to walk past the TV to the door. Not to mention the eerie dramatic background music that's currently playing.
Now I know why Lauren picked the side nearer to the door, I thought.
Lauren had placed the remote far away from my grasp - on the table near the TV - so the only thing I could do is hide under the comforter until the credits rolls around. But the suspense is just too much sometimes that I can't help but look up to the TV once in a while, only to squeal loudly every time I do so, Lauren laugh at my antics soon after.
Throughout the show, Lauren and I have gone incredibly close physically, only an inch or two separating us. It's not that it's intentional really, it's just that it gets scarier as the show goes on.
I mean, there's a fucking ghost in the morning, what kind of rubbish is this?
At one point, I pushed Lauren off the bed accidentally because of the sudden blaring sound effect, making a loud thud as Lauren's voluminous ass collided with the floor.
"Camila, what the hell?"
But before I could reply, a shriek blasted through the TV, making me shriek back instinctively and slide from the bed to the floor where Lauren was currently at, hugging Lauren koala-style while shaking uncontrollably without realizing that I'm crossing the unspoken boundary.
Lauren, having forgotten that I may or may not caused a bruise on her butt, laughed softly and stood up with me still wrapped around her. She sat back at the bed, shifting her body to lay me down on the bed, my eyes still shut painfully. She then took the comforter from the floor and draped it around me and herself.
She finally laid back down on the bed and moved her hand below my neck to move me closer to her, draping her arm around me protectively, making me rest my head on her chest. She took one of my hand and moved it across her abdomen comfortably, entangling our legs in the process.
She was still calmly watching the show, chuckling at times which made me question what her sense of humor was. My eyes never opened after that shriek and eventually made my body weak and sleepy.
While the show continued , I drifted off to sleep.
When I awoke later in the morning, I was still cuddled to Lauren in the same position we were in when I fell asleep. The TV was turned off and she had changed into a tank top and shorts, but other than that, it was all the same.
Lauren was still sleeping soundly, breathing evenly against the crown of my head. Slowly, I raised my head from her chest to look at her face from my vantage point, watching Lauren sleep peacefully. Even if her captivating green eyes were safely tucked under her eyelids, I still think she looks beautiful. She looked pale in contrast of her raven hair messily sprawled on the pillow, making her hair, eyebrows and long lashes to pop out more from her white porcelain skin.
I'm sure this must be creepy; your ex sleeping unconsciously while you're scanning over her face, memorizing her face so that you could never forget it.
Just then, I felt her stir under me. Scared of getting caught, I do the one thing actors always do in movies after staring at a person who's asleep, I lightly moved my head back to her chest, pretending to be dozed off still.
After about 2 minutes, I felt her stir once more, and this time, I know she's fully awake. She slowly moved my head away from her chest, bringing my head to the pillow while my hand was still draped on her stomach.
I felt her eyes study my face, just like what I did when she was the one sleeping. Her hand moved to my face, tucking a strand of hair behind my ear, slowly stroking my cheek lovingly, making my cells on the parts she had touched on fire.
"You're so beautiful," she whispered softly with a sigh. I felt the bed dip, indicating that she had sat on the side of the bed. I then heard her pick up the telephone and called what I could only guess as the room service.
"Hello.. Yeah... I would like to order room service... Two people... I don't know, I can't find the menu... Just bring two sets of five random breakfast meal and a jug of orange juice... Oh, and a bunch of bananas too.... No, just bananas.... Yeah... Alright, thank you."
A few minutes later, I decided to that that was enough (fake) sleeping and stirred awake, stretching to emphasize that I had just woken up.
I opened one of my eye sleepily as Lauren leaned on the headboard, a small smirk touching her lips as she looked at me.
"So... How was feigning asleep? Tiring I hope.."
***
"What are your plans this month?" She asked with her mouth full, barely decipherable. She put her hand on her mouth and took a napkin to clean her lips.
We are currently sitting on the small dining table that was leaning against the huge window, sitting across from each other while we ate our breakfast meal. Clearly, Lauren had ordered a tad bit much.
"Well, the last concert for the first leg of the tour is on the 15th so I'm probably gonna focus on that first. Sofi's birthday is today so I'm gonna call her sometime later. But since I won't be able to be there till I'm done with my tour, my parents decided to postpone her birthday party to April 17th, which is around the time I'll be back. Where are you that day? If you're in Miami, maybe you could maybe attend the party. She misses you a lot," I asked with a hint of hope that maybe, if the universe want us together, she would be in Miami.
"Actually," she said, taking a sip of the orange juice off of her glass casually, "I'm probably in Miami."
"Really?" I ask incredulously, wiping my face with a napkin after I empty the dishes, taking a few sips of the orange juice.
"Yeah, and I'll probably go. I miss Sofi too."
"What are you doing in Miami?" I asked, confused as to why she's coming back the same time as I am.
"Uhh... Lucy and I," she started, whispering inaudible words right after, seemingly trying to hide the inevitable.
"What?"
"Lucy and I are gonna talk to our parents for our wedding date," she answered louder, her face looking both apologetic and guilty.
I should've seen this coming. They've been engaged for more than a year so it's bound to happen some day. I'm aware of that. What made me confused was that I thought that maybe, now that we're close, she would be thinking twice about marrying Lucy. It's not that I don't want her to break up with Lucy really, but I don't know, Lauren's actions lately looks like she's into me more than she is into Lucy.
I should've known better though. Because now, I feel my heart breaking for the umpteenth time. And it's all from Lauren.
They're going to be official.
I diverted the topic to a more lighter one, not wanting Lauren to see the hurt on my face. I laughed, I smiled, I talked as if I was unfazed by it all when in truth, all I wanted to do was run from the suddenly suffocating room and Lauren.
Thankfully, Lauren didn't catch on and thought that I was okay, still talking animatedly about stuffs I couldn't even comprehend because of the ringing sound in my ear.
When I was out the door a little after an hour, my eyes began to water; at the brim with tears. A sob was choking my throat, begging to come out at this point.
I heard the door across from me opened but I couldn't see anything. My eyes were too blurry from the unshed tears.
"Camila?" Dinah asked with a concerned tone. I couldn't reply, my sob was still stuck in the back of my throat. Apparently, Dinah understood my difficulty because instead of asking some more, she silently walked over to me and hugged me tightly. She didn't even questioned why I was outside of Lauren's hotel room.
My legs failed me once I felt the support from Dinah but thankfully, Dinah was strong enough to carry me all on her own. She slowly walked in to her room, closing the door after we were fully in and over to the couch, allowing me to sink down on it, her arm still wrapped around me.
This time, I let go, letting my emotions run wild with everything in me while Dinah held me consolingly. My sobs were erratic against Dinah's chest, trying to choke in oxygen, tears drenching Dinah's shirt, making tear stains on it.
Lauren had thought about marrying Lucy, even after everything was the mantra that repeated inside my brain.
Just as I feel my heart start to piece back together, she runs back in and shatters it before the last piece was safely placed.
But then again, what else is new?