Seriously guys, triple update today and all because you come up with your puppy face comments that compel me to update. You guys have literally wrapped me around your fingers but what can I do? I love you all so much.
Alec's P.O.V
What the hell did I just did?
Why was I filled in so much of rage?
I pulled my hair, trying to calm myself down.
This rage wanted to hurt.
I punched the wall, broke my table, scattering the contents and papers across the room, I broke each and every window.
It was Elisa's fault, she shouldn't have riled me up so much. She shouldn't have pointed her finger at Master Gilfred, he would never do this to me. Never.
But even in this rage, I never expected to hurt her like.....like this.
I can't believe I did this to her.
Yes I wanted to punish her but not to such an extent.
There was a knock and the door opened to reveal Master Gilfred.
"What the hell did you do Alec? I can't believe you did this to your own mate. You need to apologise Alec, make things right with her. Anyways, I came here to inform you that I'm going to my village for a few days. Till then I expect you to make things right with her." He said and patted my shoulder then left.
Elisa is so wrong. Master Gilfred can never do this to me.
She is so wrong.
Elisa's P.O.V
Everything was hurting so bad. Especially my back.
I felt as if I was on fire and.... ice at the same time. I felt empty, drained.
Someone.... someone was spreading ice on my back and it felt so good that I moaned.
"Shhh..... don't move or else you will injure yourself more." A voice said.
A deep voice.
A voice that did the most unbelievable thing to me.
Alec.
My eyes snapped open.
I was on the bed on my stomach. I looked up to see stormy grey eyes staring at me in concern.
Eyes that I hate so much.
I immediately sat up and my hair glided across my back making me hiss in pain.
Alec moved closer to me as if to touch me and I jumped out of the bed.
"No littleone, don't strain yourself. I will... not touch you but please come back to the bed."
Who is littleone?
The one who was just a figment of imagination?
Or the one who Alec killed with his own hands?
I just stared at him as he took slow steps towards me.
This time I was not scared.
What more could he do?
He already did the worst by digging out my past.
"Look Elisa, I don't know what happened, trust me, I never wanted it to go this far I swear, I'm sorry. You don't know how sorry I am."
I just continued looking at him because I couldn't feel anything.
No anger, love or even...... hatred.
Is this what happens after heartbreak?
He came more closer to me now, "Elisa please just say something, anything. If you want to hit me then do it, if you want to blast me with your powers then do so but don't look at me with that lifeless expression. Your eyes should always shine Elisa, please make them shine again. Just do anything but don't be quiet." He pleaded me and clutched my shoulders.
I did not even flinch in fear.
I don't even have any more tears to conjure up in my eyes.
Like my soul, they were empty too.
"Elisa please I'm so sorry, please forgive me. I'll do anything you want, just talk to me. One word. Just one word please. I'm so sorry." He pleaded me again looking in my eyes that were practically begging me.
How ironic, A few moments before I was begging him to understand and how the tables have turned.
This feeling of being numb is horrific. At least pain is better than feeling nothing.
I always blamed pain for being my constant companion but now I understood that pain was the only thing that was keeping me alive for years.
"Don't be sorry I trusted you, my fault not yours." I said at last in a hoarse whisper.
"No no no. It's my fault, it's all my fault. I'm so sorry littleone" He said.
"I'm not your 'littleone' anymore." I whispered and his eyes reflected pain that I was able to recognize when he said he slept with me for saving his life.
My feeling are there, somewhere buried deep in my broken heart.
I think my heart wants to protect itself from breaking even more.
"Okay fine. I won't call you that Elisa. Whatever you want." He agreed to me.
I laughed humorlessly, "Elisa is dead. You killed her with your own hands." I said to him.
"No no. I refuse to believe that. If you can survive your brother then you can survive me." He said.
"You're worse that my brother." I said.
I want to feel again.
Even if it is pain.
Idea.
I pulled myself from Alec's hold and went into the bathroom without even closing the door.
I didn't even feel shame.
I went in the shower and took a deep breath.
I forced my broken palms, which were now wrapped tightly in bandages, to move and felt it.
I felt the pain.
I'm not fully dead.
I forced my fingers to move the shower knob and felt another tingle of pain.
Yes!
Water gushed out of the shower head like droplets of rain and I gasped at it's coldness.
Slowly the water turned hot and I felt the pain from my back shooting all over my body and I sighed.
This is good. Better than that hollowness.
And then like a dam breaking it's walls and water gushing out forcefully, I felt all of those emotions hit me as my heart couldn't keep them contained any longer.
I fell down on my knees again as I felt wave after wave of pain, anger, hatred, rage coming one after the other.
I smiled at that emotions.
You have literally broken me into pieces Alec Kincaid.
I felt warm tears finally gush out of my eyes as the water washed them away and felt somewhat normal.
At least my companions were back to me.
Why Alec?
WHY?
My heart shouted and it's voice echoed throughout every corner of my mind.
"Elisa are you out of your mind?" Alec shouted joining me in the shower and pulling me up to stand on my feet.
He pulled me out of the shower and tried to dry me with a towel.
"We need to get you out of these wet clothes." He said and I pulled out of his hold again.
I went into the closet and pulled out a backless top that would not touch my wounds.
I already feel the pain, no need to increase it's intensity or else I'll begin to crave it.
I donned it on along with some pants and came out of closet to find Alec still in his wet clothes.
I did not heed him any attention but went out of his room, up towards mine.
Once I reached my room, I looked up to the beautiful window with a part of branch reaching inside and nests of birds.
I nodded to myself and went to sit on the the broad window-sill.
I kept my head on the glass pane and realised that it was raining.
My favourite season.
At least I'm not the one to cry alone.
My mother always told me or I don't know if it was my real or adopted one, sad people love rain because they are not crying alone. They have a companion to lessen the burden off their soul.
I used to think that she was wrong because there are so many happy people who love rain as I was happy at that time but I was wrong about me.
For me, that statement became correct.
Happiness....? Such a foreign word.
There was a knock on my door but I didn't bother to look who it was.
"Elisa, you should eat something." Alec said but I continued staring at rain.
He is nothing to me.
He kept the plate in front of me and it's sizzling familiar smell compelled me to take a look at it.
Noodles.
If he would have done this earlier, I would have jumped in his arms with happiness.
Now it did nothing to me.
I took the plate in my hands, my palms burning with pain, and threw the plate on the floor.
It shattered into pieces and I resumed my stare out of the window.
"Is there anything you want Elisa? Anything to eat? I thought you.... loved Maggi." He actually used the word 'love'.
Why was he doing the things I wanted him to do in the past.
Why now?
"Elisa do you want anything?" He asked me again.
I turned my gaze at him, "Anything?" I retorted.
His pace lit up like a candle in darkness.
"Yes, absolutely. I'll give you anything you desire." He said excitedly.
"I never ever want to see your face again. Can you give me that?" I said and his excitement died off.
He opened his mouth and closed it again, unable to form any kind of answer.
"Thought so. You're nothing but a bluff." I said and turned back to the window again.
He left the room without any other comment.
He showed me the colours and he also painted my world black again.
Just like his black soul and dead heart.
I was so wrong to think that he has a heart.
Sad isn't it? How one's light can be snuffed out in a matter of minutes.
********
Hi guys.
See triple update.
How was it? I'm still crying.
Was it crappy? Too sad? Too cold?
Goodnight people. I'm tired by sitting in front of my phone and typing for more than half of my day.
Until then hugs and see yaa.