Demi
I was already in my room laying in bed, when Marissa called me.
M: "Hi, what's up Dems? What did you do today? I was waiting for a call to come over!"
D: "Hello Rissa! I totally forgot. I'm sorry! But I was at the Zoo today!"
M: "Maddie still likes to go to the Zoo? Really? I would have liked to come with you!"
D: "Well, actually I wasn't there with Maddie!"
M: "Did you have a date Demetria?"
D: "No, it was no date."
I told her everything about Justine and how we met. Marissa loved the pimple story and couldn't stop laughing.
M: "She sounds really nice!"
D: "Yeah, she is. I'm going to do something with her tomorrow again! I can't wait. She would totally fit in our group of friends."
M: "Enjoy your day with her Demi! After all that drama you had the last couple of weeks you really deserve to have some fun!"
And therewith we wished each other a good night.
Marissa was right. The end of my relationship with Wilmer was only two weeks ago. I broke up with him because he cheated on me and I've been so disappointed since that. Today I never had to think about him. Going out and having fun was definitely the best way to get over it. I was really sad and down the last days and did things I do regret now. But I was caught in the grief and couldn't resist. I've fallen back into old habits and got drunk a few times. I've worked so hard to get sober, I'm really disappointed and ashamed of myself.
Justine
The next morning came really quick. I was still tired when I turned my alarm off. Alex, Patrick and I drove to the restaurant where the wedding party would take place. It was a separate room and we were allowed to decorate the room and the table today. Everything was prepared so we finished in time. It looked so beautiful!
It is almost 11.30 am and I'm waiting in front of the restaurant for Demi to arrive. I really hope she will like our afternoon activity. Demi finally arrives and I greet her in the car. "Are you hungry?" I ask her. "Not really to be honest!" she answers quietly. "Are you ok? You are so silent today. Everything alright?" I wonder. "Yes, everything ok! Don't worry! Where shall I drive us?" she answers and I tell her.
Demi
I had a terrible dream last night and didn't feel good after I have woken up.
-I was in the dressing room before a concert and wanted to put on my dress, but I couldn't fit in. It was horrible. My team was laughing at me, calling me fat.-
This dream affected me. I know they will never say anything like that to me. I couldn't ask for more loyal and supportive people. But I was feeling really depressed. I wasn't able to eat my breakfast. I went to the gym and was running on the treadmill for about two hours. Then I made myself ready to pick up Justine. She looked pretty when I saw her in front of this restaurant. Her blonde hair was curly and she wore a pair of jeans with convers, a stripped shirt and a black leather jacket. She immediately noticed that something wasn't right with me but I could calm her down and tried to smile at her. She told me about the wedding tomorrow and how excited everyone is and that cheered me up. Finally we sat down in a cute little café. There were only ten tables, it was really small and cosy. We both ordered a salad and drinks.
Justine just keeps talking and I like listening to her. She makes me feel better but I can't eat a lot of my salad. I poke the fork around. "You don't like it. I can see that." she says to me concerned. "Do you feel sick?" "No, I'm just not that hungry. I had a big breakfast!" I lie. "Let's go then!" she says and pays the bill.
The next four hours were just great fun. She takes me to a rock climbing indoor gym. She even sets up a private instruction session for us in the beginning, because she's only been here twice. After the introduction we try it alone and it is amazing. I've never done that before but Justine says I am pretty good at it. She makes me feel better again and I start laughing about Justine's jokes. Some people there recognized me. So I signed autographs and I took pictures with them. Justine was patiently waiting and smiled at me.
Justine
I am happy to see her cheerful again. We had a lot of fun and it was a great idea to come here with her. Some fans wanted to talk with her and she was really lovely with them. On our way back to the car I ask her to come to the farmers market with me. I invite her over to Alexs and Patricks apartment because they were both at their parents houses for the night before the wedding. "Let's cook dinner together!"
She agrees and one hour later we arrive at the apartment. "Ok, I want to cook something for you that my mom thought me. I hope you like vegetable casserole. It's really good." I explain. She helps me cut the vegetables and soon we are able to place it in the oven. We set the table and it looks nice. We sit down an I hand her the plate. She looks at it with a worried face but at last she starts eating. "That's really good!" she says taking another bite. I smile.
Demi
I was really proud that I finished the whole meal. It was delicious. She is a great cook. After cleaning up the mess in the kitchen we sit down in the living room. "Do you want a glass of wine?" she asks me. I don't answer immediately, just look at her. I take a deep breath, "I don't like wine! I mean..." I start to stutter." I mean I can't drink wine!" "Why not? Are you histamine intolerant?" she asks. "No, I..." I don't know if I should tell her. "Hey, it's ok. You don't have to tell me. But if you want to - trust me. I'm not here to judge you or mess around." She looks at me with her deep blue eyes and I can feel she already knows something.
"I am an alcoholic, Justine." I start sobbing and feel tears running down my face.
Justine
She sits there crying and it is terrible to see her like that. I slide over next to her and grab her hand. I rub my thumb over her hand, but she can't stop crying. "Hey, sweetheart, Demi. Look at me. Everything is going to be alright, stop crying!" I try to calm her down and pull her into a hug. She lays her head on my shoulder and sobs into my neck. I sit her onto my lap and rub her back. I don't say a word, just rock her gently back and forth. I don't even know how long we are sitting here but she starts to calm down, still her head on my shoulder. I kiss her forehead and start playing with her hair. "Are you ok?" I ask her.
Demi
I am torn. Embarrassed and relieved at the same time. It feels so good to be here in her arms. I appreciate the nearness to her and finally I am able to talk with her. I trust her, I really do. That's something that never happened before. I trust a lot of people. My parents, sisters, my team and my closest friends, but I never trusted anyone that fast. I know that she would not judge me. And I talk to her. I tell her about my alcohol problem in the past. How it started when I was so young to realize the danger. When I was trapped in my addiction not able to stop. I tell her about my highs and my lows coming with my alcohol abuse. About fake friends and wrong decisions. And I tell her about rehab. How I struggled through my first year afterwards, some serious setbacks and at least I tell her everything about Wilmer. He was my biggest supporter, stayed with me, when others left me. But then I had to leave him because he induced new pain I couldn't handle. I tell her about me getting drunk the last days and how badly I want to be sober again. Justine holds me, strokes my hair and just listens attentively. She doesn't say anything, letting me talk.
"Stay strong! Is that what your tattoo stands for?" she asks to break the silence. "For that and so much more." I show her my wrists. She touches them carefully, feeling my scars and looks at me. "You were self harming?" she asks. I just nod my head and sigh. "You may think I am a total mess, insane, crazy?" I ask her. "And I didn't even tell you everything I went through." "No, I don't think that. You are a strong and sincere woman, Demi! You have overcome so much, more than I can ever imagine. And I admire you for that. My god, you are only 19 years old. You should be so proud of yourself. You are an inspiration and absolutely amazing! And I'm not telling you that just for good. I mean every word of it. I truly do! You are a warrior, Demi! A survivor. And I am so honored that you shared your story with me. I keep that as a secret. You can trust me! Everything is safe in my heart!" She hugs me again and holds me in her hug for some time. It feels so good to tell her that. I could hear a rock falling from my heart. I have to keep Justine in my life.
Justine
I am so overwhelmed by her story. She opened up so much and it's inconceivable how she fights against all that. I'm not sure if I could be so strong. She is incredible. This girl is a gift and I am so thankful that I have met her. All I want is to protect her and help her when ever she wants and needs my help. I want to keep her in my life.
I was holding her close. We've lost the track of time. We don't talk anymore, it is silent and I notice that she is more and more relaxed again. She seems to like me playing with her hair. Suddenly my phone rings and we are coming back to reality. Demi is checking the time. "Oh god, it's almost midnight. I have to go, Justine!" she says and gets up. "Are you sure? It's late, you can sleep over if you want to!" I answer. "That's really nice, but I can't. You know, I am living in a sober living home and we have to be back before midnight so that they make sure we are ok." she explains and I guide her to the front door.
Demi
I feel so much better now. She wasn't persistent at all and I really have the feeling that she can handle all the stuff I've told her. The way she held me close relaxed me in way I wasn't for a long time. "Justine, thank you for..." "Hey, for what? It's ok. I want you to know that you can call me anytime you need to talk with someone, alright? You are very special, girlie, in many ways. Don't forget that, ok?" she says and I can feel tears back in my eyes. "I will call you and I want to thank you. These past hours helped me a lot. Thank you for your succor. And you are very special too!" and with that she pulls me in a hug. "Can you promise me something?" I ask her. "Anything!" "I am so happy that you've never heard of that musician Demi Lovato. Because there are people outside who are writing things about me that are not true. And there are stories about me and my past I want to tell you personally. Please don't read any of those stories. Promise?" I am really serious about that. I don't know if she wants to see me again, when she reads all that stuff. Some things are true, but most of it is just crap. "I promise, don't worry!" I hug her one last time! "Thank you so much, seriously, for everything! Good night" I say and go to my car.