Morning came far too fast as her phone chirped out it's fuck awful alarm at 7 am. Begrudgingly, she picked it up and turned it off, stretching and rubbing her eyes. The lure of the snooze button was not for her, the comfort of that extra ten minutes curled up in bed. All those years in the Army had drummed into her the habit that was the early start. In fact, by the Army's standard, 7 AM was a considerable sleep in but she reconciled that with her being on late duties last night and having an early start the morning before.
Yawning noisily, she headed into the bathroom, pulling on that conveniently hung robe and let herself out as quickly as she could. The lure of the pool was calling and she was anxious for the peace and quiet it would give her to ease her still racing mind.
She didn't get her peace because as she left the bathroom, she found, sitting cross-legged on the bed like a fucking pixie, is a grinning Camila Cabello.
"Morning, Lauren," she said brightly, far too brightly for someone who seemed to have knocked back enough booze to float a warship last night.
"Good morning," she replied, picking up her swimsuit and towel. "Can I help you?"
"You can. It's time for my morning run and seeing as you're supposed to be protecting me, that means, it's time for your morning run, too"
Lauren glared at her and held up her swimsuit for her to see. "I was about to hit the pool. I don't really enjoy running."
"You can hit the pool after the run. I normally do. Come on, a quick few miles around the grounds, it'll build up an appetite for breakfast."
She sat down on the bed, resigned to her fate. She never saw Miss Cabello as a runner, least of all a fucking runner who actually wanted to go outside and away from the comfort of a warm gym showing MTV; where she could show off to the buffs who, in turn, were trying to show off lifting weights. Still, she was right; if she was going running in public, then Lauren had to go with her and reluctantly, the raven-haired woman grabbed her gym gear and began to drag it on.
"I should go and, uh, get warmed up," Camila said turning away quickly as Lauren dropped her robe to the floor and pulled on her running gear. She could feel the woman's burning embarrassment as she changed, obviously, not leaving to get warmed up as she said she would, but instead feeling those chocolate eyes flick to her as she struggled with her clothes; taking little glances at her when she thought Lauren wasn't looking.
"Problem, Miss Cabello?" she teased as she pulled on her hooded top over her newly bought sports bra and laced up her fucking expensive running shoes; another 'essential piece of workwear' as Ally had put it. She didn't feel quite so guilty about charging them to the company now. She was using them on works time on the instructions of her employer after all.
"No, Miss Jauregui," she replied her voice guarded. "Apart from the fact that you promised to call me Camila."
"I said I'd think about it; I never said I'd do it."
"Oh." she said chastened as Lauren stood up, "and you never wore the dress I left you last night either."
"It wasn't really my cut, Mis.. Camila. I don't really do backless, or flowing gowns; they're just not me. Besides, as I said, I was working last night. I needed to wear something a bit more practical, just in case."
"Right," she continued, avoiding the brunette's eyes and adjusting her shoes instead; trying to turn the subject away from last night. "I'm ready when you are."
"I'll grab my swimming stuff then," Camila said, "there's a hut next to the pool, we can get changed down there after the run. It'll save wandering backward and forward through the house."
She slipped out of the room for a second before returning holding a bag. Lauren stuffed her towel and her suit into her bag and followed Camila who unlocked her door and headed downstairs.
They stretched out next to the large outdoor pool where Camila had placed their bags in a substantial, chalet-styled hut containing a large spa pool and what looked like an outdoor sauna; nothing but the best for the Cabellos, she muses. After ten minutes of gentle warming up, Camila started jogging on the spot.
"Come on Lauren, you ready?"
"I'm ready," she replied, trying to hide her unease," but you may have to go easy on me, Camila. It's been a while since I actually pounded the pavements properly. I'm probably a little out of condition."
"I will. I promise," she said heading off and leaving Lauren to catch up with her. "I normally do at least a lap of the grounds when I'm here, but don't worry, it's only a few miles."
She winked at Lauren's look of horror and grinned, setting a slightly faster pace. "I love running here, it makes me feel free. It always gave me peace and quiet to think, you know?"
"I get the same thing in the pool," she told her as she slipped into her easy pace and ran next to her on the path. "I don't really like running but I do love swimming; have done since childhood really. Well, since I was a teenager."
"Was that when you lived in Fort Myers?"
She looked across at her suspiciously. She has no memory at all about mentioning where she grew up, to anyone, least of all to her. In fact, apart from Dinah, who's background research seemed all too thorough, she can't think of a soul that she might have met who knows. Well, apart from Lucy and judging by their last meeting, it's unlikely the two women have been phone buddies since.
"Your portfolio was hardly revealing, Lauren but it did tell me that. Papi was showing it to me the day you first arrived. I know that you're 26, you lived in Miami before joining the Army and lived pretty much on base during your time there; it also said that you did one tour in Iraq and three in Afghanistan besides spending time in the UK and Germany."
"Old news now, Camila," she said, puffing a bit already and trying to watch her breathing. "Thanks to Sofi, that is. Though it forgot about a stint in Northern Ireland and a trip to Canada on exercise. What else did it say?"
"Just that you'd been injured and the only reason you left the Army is because you had to. Why was that?"
"Got shot in the arm and the leg," she said holding out her left arm and flexing the fingers, "I failed my combat medical and they wanted to put me behind a desk."
"You got shot in the leg?" Camila said, shock in her voice. "Shit, why didn't you tell me you got shot in the leg? Damn, Lauren, I'd never have dragged you out running if I'd known."
"It's fine, Camila. The leg's not the problem. It's my arm that's a bit broken; I've got minor nerve damage, apparently. It shouldn't affect me in any normal way, it just meant I wasn't capable of shooting properly according to the MO."
"It seemed fine when you were shooting with Mami yesterday."
"It was; it's more to do with my fingers actually and I never really understood it. I have to say my old shoulder wound was a bit sore afterward; that Purdey packs one hell of a punch."
"I'll take your word for it," Camila said nudging her as they ran. "I fucking hate the things."
"Yeah, you said you don't like guns yesterday. Any particular reason for hating weapons, soldiers and war, or is it just a moral thing?" she asked, smiling across at her.
"Bitch, if you must know, it's not just a moral thing; though I am philosophically opposed to war and all that goes with it. I don't like fighting of any type and it seems that every single person I've met from the military, and I've met a lot of people in my time, is a moronic fool. All the officials seem to be inbred sexists who see me as a silly little girl in a man's world. Christ, some of them even look at me as if I should screw them to get their business; and all the ex-soldiers who have ended up trying to look after my family are about as intelligent as that tree, and have about as many morals as it as well."
"How do you know that tree doesn't have morals?" she asked, maybe a little harsher than she'd intended feeling the sting from the woman's casual comment. Angry and embarrassed, she kicked on and passed her; putting on a burst of speed to increase the distance between them.
"Shit, shit," the brunette exclaimed, pulling to a halt and shouting after her. "I didn't mean you, Lauren, I'm sorry if you thought that; you're nothing like those others."
She didn't stop running, following the path around the grounds and towards a tree-filled hollow in the distance.
"Lauren!" she called after her, "Lauren, what's the fucking matter? I said I was sorry."
She heard her start running again, her breathing getting closer as she sprinted along to catch her up. They ran for a while in silence, the crunching of the cinders underfoot was the only noise they made. Camila kept on flicking glances towards her as they ran, looking across at her as Lauren ardently ignored her.
She was still smarting from her comments; Camila might not have meant her in particular, but she was still shitting on people from the Forces. Once again lumping them all in that huge bigoted barrel of hers and that still hurts. She thought she'd helped her past that, back at the apartment when they'd finally called a cessation to hostilities.
"This is about last night, isn't it," Camila said out of nowhere; surprising Lauren with her frankness. "You're pissed off at me because I kissed you last night; that's what it is, isn't it?"
"No, Miss Cabello, this is nothing to do with last night. I'm pissed off because you singularly fail to grasp that people in the Forces are just that, people. We have feelings and issues and problems and families just like you, yet, you constantly dismiss us like we're nothing."
"I didn't mean you, Lauren. I said that. I meant the idiots that have come to do your job in the past, the people I've had to deal with, I was speaking from experience."
"Then say that, Miss Cabello," she said exasperatedly, "stop making such sweeping statements about us, stop sounding like you're generalizing. You wouldn't like it if I said that all arms dealers were unscrupulous profiteers with no moral fiber and no conscience. That they're all bastards; that they're all responsible for the deaths of innocents all over the world. You wouldn't like that, would you? Because you'd be a part of that group, Miss Cabello and that would hurt you, even if I told you that I meant everyone else."
They ran on in silence again, the cluster of tree's getting ever closer as their feet pounded against the hard ground.
"I'm sorry, Lauren, you're right again; I just don't think before I speak, do I? Jesus, I know how to put my foot in my mouth. I didn't mean to offend you."
"It's ok, Miss Cabello. I'm sure I can find it in me to forgive you. We're like that in the Forces, we don't hold grudges."
Lauren dropped back a pace, running just behind her shoulder, taking a break from the conversation and trying to indicate that, as far as she was concerned, it had ended. Camila seemed to take the hint as she ran, leading them onwards at a steady pace that was making Lauren's lungs burn a little and boring the shit out of her.
See, this is the problem with running. It's why she doesn't like it. When she swims, she feels totally isolated. It's the pool and her. And the pool is nothing but the few feet of water that surrounds her wherever she goes. When she swims, she's completely alone with her thoughts and that's exactly how she likes it. When she runs, she can't think. She can't cut herself off from the sounds and the sensations and the people. She can't cut herself off from everything that's around her, can't switch off from the constant repetitive pounding and the pain of her aching knees.
Because that's all she can think of, because there's nothing to stimulate her mind, she gets bored pretty quickly. In fact, she's really fucking bored right now. One, two, Left, right... that's all running is, a constant cycle of 'pick 'em up and put 'em down', achieving nothing but getting from one place to another and they have cars for that kind of uninspired travel.
Seriously, she fucking hates it. Though the sight of Camila's behind running in front of her in those tight running shorts is a distinct improvement on the view of the guys she had to train with in the Army.
A huge improvement in fact.
o+o+o
With Camila leading the way, they turned off the main path and ran towards the tree-filled hollow she'd seen earlier. She wondered what the petite was doing as they picked their way across the rough ground and into the woods until suddenly the trees cleared and she was amazed to find a small sculpted lake nestling in between those trees. A thin gravel path surrounded its neat edges and the morning sun was reflecting lazily off the still water. Camila led her along the path and they began a lap of this little grotto, shaded from the early morning sun by the dappled shade of the trees.
She felt a wonderful sense of peace come over her as they ran around that lovely looking lake and she couldn't help but wonder what it would be like to jump in and swim from one end to the other. 'Freezing cold' was her first thought, but that still didn't stop the urge to dive headlong into those dark waters and find herself some peace.
"Penny for them?" Camila said as they ran, their bodies starting to perspire under the exertion.
"I was thinking how nice it would be to go swimming in there, actually." she said shortly, not bothering to expand on things any further.
"Lauren, I said I was sorry," she said, sounding genuinely upset.
"and I said I forgave you," she told her simply, not wanting to get into a fight with her charge.
"But you're still mad at me," Camila said, drawing to a standstill in a little opening in the trees, shaking out her limbs as she stopped to keep her muscles loose.
"A little," she admitted, running lightly on the stop to warm down, breathing slightly more heavily than she used to at this stage in a combat fitness test.
"Can we talk about this?" Camila asked sitting herself onto a tree stump, looking for all the world like a forest fairy, albeit one dressed head to toe in Nike sportswear.
"Can we talk about what, Miss Cabello?" she replied, stretching out her tightening calf muscle and wincing slightly at the pain.
"This fucking elephant that's sitting between us, Lauren; the one you're trying to pretend doesn't exist. Why don't we just talk about what happened between us last night? You know, when you came looking for me, threatened to kick my door down and talked to me like I was a fucking human being; last night when you made me feel like I was actually worth something, do you remember? Last night... when I kissed you."
So she remembered; remembered a lot more than Lauren thought she might. Yes, she'd been hoping Camila would forget. Yes, she hoped that she'd think it was some kind of drunken dream and that they'd go back to how it was before she opened Pandora's box with that kiss.
She also remembered Dinah's words from last night; she's right, she does have a choice and with great reluctance, she made it.
"Last night was a mistake, Miss Cabello," she told her firmly. "You were drunk and I was stupid; it should never have happened"
Camila looked across at her, eyes hurt, before looking away staring into the lake. Gazing into those still waters as if she hoped that they would reach out to swallow up her words.
"But I wanted it to happen, don't you get that?"
'Don't tell me things like that, Camila. You're making this hard for me.'
"I get that you were drunk and may have wanted to try something, Miss Cabello, but I'm not your experiment. You don't mess with people like that. I'm a person, and that's not something you do just because you want to try something different."
"Experiment?! Is that what you think that was?"
"It doesn't matter what I think, Miss Cabello. Experiment or not, it was a mistake. Maybe, it was just the alcohol, right? You were just a little drunk, maybe that's all it was; just one more drink-induced lapse in judgment."
"No, Lauren, it wasn't just the drink. Though, I admit that it may have made it easier. It wasn't just a fucking experiment. I felt like kissing you, so I did. It's not like you didn't enjoy it."
"What?" she asked, a little shaken by the tone. "What makes you say that?"
"You kissed me back, Lauren. Don't try and pretend otherwise because I was fucking there and I remember it clearly. Very fucking clearly, in fact. I kissed you and you kissed me back. Now we either deal with it or we go on trying to pretend like it never happened and fuck this all up."
So there it is. Camila has a very neat way of simplifying matters, distilling the complex right down into its simplest, most concentrated form. She had kissed her back. In truth, she had fucking enjoyed it. She really does want to pretend it never happened, though she knows that's a pipe dream as well.
"Like I said, I was stupid, Miss Cabello; sue me, I'm human. I get kissed by a pretty girl and I can't help but be flattered, you know? Doesn't mean that what I did was right, though. I'm supposed to be a fucking professional. I need to be professional and that doesn't include kissing my clients in garden sheds. That's a profession I don't want to be a part of."
"So, you regret it?" she asked simply, those big brown eyes boring into hers. She sat herself down on a fallen log next to her and sighed.
"Yes, Miss Cabello, I regret it. I wish you hadn't kissed me and I wish I hadn't enjoyed it and wanted to kiss you back. I'm your CPO, Miss Cabello. I just can't do things like that; they make things complicated and complicated gets people hurt."
Camila sat staring at her for a while as if she was sifting through her head searching for the truth; before finally speaking.
"Can't things be complicated?"
Lauren shrugged by way of reply; not the answer Camila wanted, not really the one she wanted to give. She can't even look her in the eye because everything she's saying is a lie. Well, sort of. She regrets kissing her back, and yet, she doesn't as well. Things are already complicated. She's not sure she needs them to get any more complicated.
"Fine," the brunette announced jumping off the stump and bouncing on her toes to warm up her muscles. "Come on, we've got two more laps to do, then we can follow the path home."
Something's not right. Her head tells her as Camila stretches out once again. This was too easy, she dropped the subject too quickly for her liking. She's forcing herself not to be concerned, though. The subject has been dropped and that's a relief. As she climbs to her feet and stretches out her already tightening muscles, she can feel Camila's eyes on her. She was right, something tells her that this isn't the end of this conversation.
o+o+o
The run back was quiet. Well, as far as deep and meaningful conversations went. They jogged in more or less silence, completing their laps of the lake before leaving the woods and heading out into the bright morning sun. There was a bit more activity around the estate as they crossed the top of the South Gardens and ran past Sinu's shooting hut. Figures could be seen in the windows of the house and somewhere in the distance, the distinctive sound of a two stroke engine was chugging along, presumably some sort of large lawnmower to sort out the Cabello's massive gardens.
There was a faint smell of cooking as they passed the kitchens, the hint of a soldier's breakfast being cooked. They ignored it and pressed on, finally arriving back at their starting point.
"Twice around the pool to warm down, Lauren, come on." Camila said, setting off at a light jog, before slowing down to a walk. "You're not as unfit as you implied, Lauren. Do you always tell lies like that?"
She shook her head, trying to catch her breath once again. In all honesty, she'd surprised herself this morning. Ok, they hadn't exactly been running at her normal CFT speeds, but still, she hadn't done badly, all things considered.
"Next time, I'll run at my normal pace; see if you can keep up, then."
There was a playful smirk on Camila's face as she said it, but still, Lauren vowed to get herself up to peak fitness as soon as possible. The brunette might think she's a runner, but she can run too; She just doesn't like it.
"Not a problem, Camila," she told her, using her first name for the first time since the lake; trying, in her own strange way, to tell her she'd forgiven her for her insult and that it was time to move on.
"I bet you dinner some time that you won't be able to keep up, though."
"Done," she said before she realized the consequences of what she'd just agreed to.
"Cool," Camila said quickly before she got a chance to retract her agreement. "I'll look forward to winning that bet; time for that swim then."
The ex-sergeant got changed quickly and dived into the cold water of the open air pool. It was a warm morning but the water was, in fact, icy cold and she was glad that she'd warmed down from the run properly before diving in. As it was, she could feel the shock hitting her muscles as the cold sank in and she swam a little bit faster to get everything moving once again.
She immersed herself fully in that freezing cold water and turned her thoughts inward; this was a mess, a mess of her own creation. She knew that giving in about Camila's name would be a big deal, would perhaps signal a softening in the professionalism that she'd so carefully cultured. What she hadn't expected, not in a million years, was that the brunette would actually kiss her as a result and that she would kiss her back as passionately, as deeply, as she had done.
It was indeed a mess; Pandora's box was well and truly open and no amount of screaming or sulking or crying would put the evils that she had wrought back in there. Just like in the ancient story, all that was left in that box was hope, the hope that things wouldn't go wrong; the hope that everything would be all right.
She'd tried to push her away by the lake but she didn't seem to want to stay pushed. She gave her the impression that she'd merely conceded some ground, pulled back her forces in order to muster her troops ready for the counter attack. The question was, was Lauren prepared enough to rebuff her next charge, or the one after that? What was her tactical situation, could she stand firm, did she even want to?
As she swam, she thought honestly with herself about the situation, thinking carefully about Dinah's words. Did she want to see where things would develop with her or did she want to go back to being the 'stuck up, tight ass' she had described her as? What the hell did Camila want? That was another important question. It seemed strange to her that all this happened after Lucy appeared back in her life; that she would start being nice to her and then kiss her after she found out she was gay. Was she just some kind of fucking experiment, despite her words? Was this just something she'd wanted to get out of her system, a chance to mess around? Was she just looking for a quick fling? Was she simply trying to use her to dabble with her sexuality, before she went back to the business of hunting for the ideal boyfriend ready for the big wedding the Cabellos no doubt wanted?
Was she making too much of something that was very, very simple?
Yes, Camila is gorgeous. Yes, she is attracted to her, why not see where things go? Even if it was an experiment, it didn't mean it couldn't be fun for both of them. Neither of them had to get hurt if neither of them are really that serious. Besides, in private, things were different between them already. She can't even say with any certainty that the woman had changed towards her after Lucy appeared. After all, weren't there signs of Camila warming up to her even after they got back to the apartment following that chase?
Jesus, it's fucking scary to think about, but in only three days, Camila had well and truly burrowed herself in and made herself at home, so what difference would a bit of friendliness make?
Oh, fuck it. She doesn't really know anything anymore. Maybe things are simple. Maybe they are complicated. Either way, she had to make that choice all over again, follow Dinah's advice or remain professionally distant. Not for the first time in her life, she was happy that she was swimming, happy that she could lock herself away with her thoughts and analyze everything carefully. Weigh up the pros and cons like this was any other mission; look for the weak areas where she could get hit and hurt by the enemy; decide upon the right approach.
In the silence of that cold pool, she made her decision. She could be friendly, then maybe see if anything else will follow.
Worse comes to worst, she'll get Dinah to take her off this duty. Worse comes to worst, she'll simply resign before anyone gets hurt; emotionally or physically.
o+o+o
After about ten more minutes of working her way back and forth through the cold and silent water, she reluctantly hauled herself to the edge of the pool and climbed out; grabbing her towel and rubbing herself down quickly. She looked back into the pool for her training partner, only to find her sat on a nearby bench, obviously showered and changed, smiling back at her.
"Good swim? You were in there forever," Camila said, looking her up and down.
"I thought you were planning on joining me."
"Fuck that, Lauren," she said pointing at a large wood and glass thermometer that was attached to the side of the pool. "Did you not see how fucking cold that water is before you dived in? There's not a fucking chance you'll get me in there; not when there's a warm shower and a change of clothes waiting in my room."
"Your loss," she told her, "the water was great, a bit chilly admittedly, but exhilarating especially after that run. You should have tried it, gets the heart racing; makes you feel alive."
She looped the towel around her neck and walked over to the pool hut where she'd got changed, bending over to grab her hoody from the bench next to her gym bag where she'd left it.
As she stood, she felt the heat of a warm hand touch the bare part of her back, the part where the figure hugging material of her racing swimsuit didn't cover the soft skin. Delicately, she felt a finger softly trace the line of her spine, sending tingles through her nerves and then shivered slightly as warm breath flowed like water across the back of her neck.
"Fuck, Lauren," she heard Camila whisper with a voice filled with awe, "that's beautiful."
"May I?" Camila asked sheepishly as Lauren turned to look at her. Her eyes were open wide, a look of pleasure on her face. "it's amazing, such craftsmanship, it's like they're real."
Her brain finally clicked as to what she'd been looking at and why she'd touched her; she'd seen the tattoo that covered pretty much all of her back. It's funny, but she wouldn't think of her as being a tattoo person; but then, she had mentioned painting last night, so perhaps, as an artist, she would just want to appreciate the work. The only thing is, she's still wet through and stood in nothing but her swimsuit. She really doesn't have the fondness to model her tattoo for her right now.
"Yeah, sure," she told her, "look all you like, but can I at least get in and get a shower first, please? It's not exactly summer out here, is it?"
Camila nodded, removing her soft warm hand from Lauren's back and looking embarrassed as she pulled her hooded top over her wet swimwear; covering her bare skin and the artwork on her back.
"You really should have worn that dress, you know" she told her seriously. "It would have looked amazing with that work showing. You'd have just killed some of the women at that party if they'd seen you looking like that."
"Yeah well, I'm not really supposed to be visible, Camila. I'm supposed to be invisible, you know? Hiding in the shadows and only appearing when needed to save La Familia Cabello from dangers, real and imagined. Anyway, I think one person stealing the limelight from Sofi made her grumpy enough."
To her surprise, the brunette looked up at her with interest, "Someone made Sofi angry by turning up? Who was it? Was it Dinah? Or Normani? Come on, Lauren, spill... Sofi fucking hates being upstaged."
She looked up at her as she sat on the hut's bench seat dried off her feet so she could slip her socks and shoes back on. Her eyes were filled with curiosity; strange, surely she knew who'd upstaged her sister.
"You're kidding, right? You really don't know?"
"I didn't spend much time at the party, remember?" she said. "With what happened with Papi, I didn't go back. I have no idea who could have upstaged Sofi; I really wish I'd seen it, though. She tries so hard to be the 'belle of the ball'. She must have been green with envy."
She actually sounds quite satisfied that her sister had finally been upstaged by someone. Lauren got a brief glimpse at the sibling rivalry they had right then. It must be tough for her having to fight to be seen with Sofi being given the limelight all her life.
"Oh, she turned a pretty lovely shade of green," she told her as she finished retying her laces, "I'm surprised you didn't notice, she was looking right at you at the time."
Camila's head snapped to stare at hers. "You mean me? You think it was me who upstaged her last night?"
She really did sound surprised. Lauren's probably not the only one around here that's 'not too bright' as Dinah put it.
"Yes Camila, you. Did you not take a look at yourself in a mirror before you came down those stairs? I actually believed, at one point, that I was going to have to protect you from her; the looks she kept giving you as you made that big entrance should have killed you stone dead."
"Really?" she said with a shy smile on her face that had more than a hint of being slightly smug.
"Yes," she replied, standing and picking up her bag and throwing it over her shoulder. "Really."
Camila was still smiling shyly as they walked back into the house. She had a little spring to her step that Lauren had not seen before, probably quite pleased that she'd totally outshone her sister with her entrance to the party. She's cute when she does that, she makes it really hard to stay professional.
'Damn it, Camila. This is fucking killing me, fucking stop it!'
"Right, this is me," she said as they reached her room, eager to escape the brunette "I need a shower, some dry clothes and food in that order."
"Well, you'd better move your ass, if you want breakfast. You've got about twenty minutes before we all sit down."
"We all?" she asked, resting her hand on the large oak door, slightly bemused by the comment.
"Yeah, it's kind of a tradition when we're all here. We all have breakfast together before we go our separate ways. We don't get to meet up as a family all that often, not since Sofi moved out. But we normally sit down at nine and it's twenty minutes until that, so you'd better get going. If you've stayed, you've got to have breakfast before you leave. That's Mami's rule."
"Not a problem," she told her, twisting the handle of her door. "I'd hate to break one of your mom's rules. It should only take me ten minutes to get ready if I get moving. Now if you'll excuse me, I think I have a hot date with a warm shower."
She shoved open the door into her room and stepped in, kicking it closed behind her as she pulled at the hem of her top dragging the hoodie over her head and throwing it towards the bed. She was stopped in her tracks, as she took a half a step towards the bathroom, by a loud thump and an even louder scream from the hallway.
"What the fuck?!" she exclaimed and opened the door to see Camila sat on the carpet, white-faced, with tears in her eyes. She was sitting on the floor holding her left wrist, the one she'd hurt during the car chase, the one she thought was ok.
"Camila, are you all right, what the fuck happened?!"
"You slammed the fucking door on me and when I put my stupid fucking hand out to stop it closing, I must have caught it funny," she said flexing her wrist up and down gingerly. "Fuck, that hurts!"
"Jesus, Camz," Letting the nickname slip, she squatted down next to her, "are you going to be ok?"
"I'll be fine," Camila said, not looking fine at all; looking pretty fucking far from fine, if the truth be told. "Help me up, would you?"
"Shit, I'm so sorry, Camila," she said, ignoring her proffered hand and stepping behind her; slipping her hands under her shoulders and lifting her to her feet.
"I didn't realize you were following me in. I thought you were going to your room or something. Why were you trying to hold open my door?"
"I needed to get into my room," she said, wincing through the pain. "I have to go through yours to get there now; someone locked my door last night and now the fucking lock's broken. It looks like the mechanism is completely jammed up now though and I can't turn the key anymore."
"Shit, this is all my fault in more ways than one then," she admitted sheepishly, "I was the one who locked your door last night."
"I thought you'd come into my room last night. I'd convinced myself I was dreaming, though. What the fuck did you lock my door for?"
"I didn't want you sleepwalking," she told her sitting her down on the end of the bed and checking her wrist with her fingertips as she frowned at her.
"I was making sure no one could just get into your room. What the fuck else would I be doing, Camila? Your mom asked me to check in on you, so I did."
Camila stuck her tongue out at her in response and then winced as she very gently tried to rotate her wrist.
"Is there a car here that I can use? I think we need to go to the hospital, Camila. You should get this X- Rayed. What did that doctor say the other day, back at the flat?"
"She thought I'd sprained it; told me that I should go and see my doctor."
"and you did nothing about it?" she asked astonished. Frankly, she is stunned by her lack of common sense; She thought she was more intelligent than that, she must have been in pain for the last few days and tried to hide it.
"I've been busy. I had that deal to settle, remember? Then Papi wanted to have dinner, then we had plans to come here. Anyway, I didn't want to make a fuss, it was only a sore wrist and it didn't hurt that much. On the scale of having a stand-up fist fight, getting shot at, covered in broken glass and having to look after me, it didn't seem that important. Besides, I really didn't want a bandage to ruin my dress last night."
" ¡Qué payasa! You don't mess about with injuries, Camila, that's one of the things they taught me in the Army. Everyone tries to tough it out, makes light of their injuries to show how hard they are, but it always comes back to bite you in the ass... if you're lucky that is."
"and if you're unlucky?" she asked as Lauren held her arm across her body and used her shirt to make a temporary sling.
"If you're unlucky, it comes back to bite everyone on the ass. Next time you're hurt, you tell me, ok? No hiding things. I can't help you if I don't know what's wrong. Right, you sit there and don't move and don't strain that wrist any further. I'm going to take a quick shower and then I'm driving you to the nearest hospital."
"Breakfast first, though?" she said, looking horrified that the raven-haired woman would attempt to deny her food.
"Yes, Miss Cabello," she said smiling at her. "If that's what you want, then it's breakfast first, but we're going to get that strapped up before you sit down; I've seen how fast you can eat."
She was less than five minutes in the shower, though she could have spent hours in there, her muscles starting to ache after their bout of exertion, the warm water pounding the throb into submission. As she sluiced the soap off, she heard a knock on the door and Camila's voice calling out.
"Lauren, there's about five minutes to breakfast, you might want to get moving."
Reluctantly, she turned off the water and stripped the excess water from her skin. As she toweled herself off, as quickly as she could, she reflected that at least it was Saturday and she didn't need to put on makeup other than to hide her black eye a bit and she wouldn't have to wear a suit. She pulled on her shorts, dragged a brush through her unruly hair and shoved her way through the door and into her room to finish getting dressed.
Camila was still lying on her bed, fiddling with her phone as she came in, she looked up only to close her eyes and look away quickly as she saw her walking in half-naked.
"Christ, Camila," Lauren said, amused at her antics, "you don't have to keep doing that, you know? There's nothing special about my body. We're both built the same."
Camila turned her head slowly as she sat down on the bed and pulled on her jeans; she opened her mouth as if to say something, before closing it and looking at Lauren back again. Her eyes flicking back and forth as she strove to take it all in.
Lauren turned her head with a small, hidden, smile of pride. She can understand why the woman keeps staring at it. Even now, years after she'd had the tattoo done, she still finds herself admiring it when she catches sight of it in a mirror.
It had taken three sessions split over twelve months to complete in total, the outline being done first and allowed to heal before she had a chance to get back to the shop and allow the artist to get on with doing the coloring. It took up practically the whole of her back and had meant she couldn't sleep comfortably for weeks as it healed. It had taken most of her leave time to get it done as well but she didn't regret any of it; not one lost hour of sleep, not one moment of pain. She didn't even regret the agony they had put her through when she'd had to pull her rucksack onto her still healing back and head out on another miserable training march.
They were her twin dragons and she fucking loves them.
As she'd tried to explain to Camila in the coffee shop, some people get tattoos because it's just the done thing, they got them to be normal rather than unique. She'd seen plenty of them in the Army, loads of the guys in her unit had them done after their first tour in Afghanistan. Fuck, even she had one done as well. Her pride and joy was different, though. Her pride and joy meant something to her. She'd got it done because she wanted it to symbolize something very special and she'd been very, very specific about what she wanted.
On her back, coupled in an almost endless embrace, were her twin dragons. The largest was a red and gold dragon; not one of those European dragons, all wings and Arthurian mysticism, but a Japanese dragon. A fire dragon, in fact; large and bold and fierce looking; staring out from her right shoulder blade with a look that could level whole nations, whole planets in fact. Around that was intertwined a second, slightly smaller dragon; blue and white, the colors of ice but no less fierce for it, glaring at the world from under the blanket of its guardians love, its head cradled protectively under the claw of the other, resting slightly on its guardian's chest.
Down the left-hand side of her back, she'd had the artist carefully ink in the kanji, the characters hurting almost as much as the outline had; but the pain had been good, cathartic almost. It was the pain that made the tattoo mean something to her, made it feel like the symbol it was.
Red and Blue, Fire and Ice, Mother and Daughter.
Her twin dragons were the symbol that Clara Jauregui was always with her, her love wrapped around her, protecting her always. Fire was how she always thought of her mother, her passion for justice and freedom still consuming every moment of her life, almost to the very end.
She went by many names; activist, revolutionary, anarchist even. But to her, she was always just Mami and she loved her as dearly as she loved her. She loved her despite the hard times she'd put her through as she grew up and learned to come to terms with who she was, who she is. Through it all, through the pain and the confusion; and as bitchy and rebellious as she was during that time, her mother's love for her never faltered. She was her mom, the one true constant in her life, the one person she can honestly say, hand on heart, that she loved...still love to this day.
She has more than one tattoo on her body, some were just frivolous things that she saw and wanted; but two were important to me, they were symbols of her and her mother and they both meant more to her than everything she'd ever had done. They were her attempt at lessening the pain of her loss, not that it had really worked; but they were, at the very least, her reminders of her and they never ceased to make her happy.
She could feel Camila's eyes examining every line, every scale on those dragons' bodies and she shifted her body slightly to allow her to look at it properly. She didn't say a word as Lauren moved around, pulling on her boots.
"Done?" she asked twisting her head around to look at her. "Because I think I need to put a shirt on. I'm not sure what your breakfast dress code is here, but I'm sure turning up topless isn't going to win me any awards with your family."
Camila didn't say anything but just replied by breaking out in another one of those shy smiles, another one that didn't really touch those pain-dulled eyes that she was careful to keep hidden.
"Right, ready when you are, Miss Cabello; now, let's go and get that wrist strapped up before you damage it trying to eat!"