" Can I hold it down?
Have I been trying my best?"
The muffled sound of Christo singing for his soundcheck plays in the background but we stay quiet, gazing at one another from centimeters away. My heart beats against my chest, a trance like state controlling my body. I had ignored looking into his eyes for so long and now I'm stuck, my body frozen in place yet lit on fire under his gaze. His eyes gaze back and forth between my features as I gaze deeply into his dark brown eyes, the light behind me glistening them.
As we stare at one another his fingers continue their assault on my thighs, running up and down them, creating tension in between my legs and through my body. My breathing accelerates and his eyes travel down to my lips, taking his own bottom one in between his teeth. My eyes gaze down at his very own lips and it seems as if almost immediately after he latches his hands to my calves and brings me closer. I suck in a sharp breath as he brings us even closer than before, an unnoticeable amount of space now in between us. My injured hand what seems like instinctively moves towards his waist but before it can he takes it in his own and moves it away from him. My heart stops and I almost push him away and return back to reality but before I can he notices my uneasy behavior and reaches for my uninjured hand and places it on his waist, making sure that I don't injure myself more than I did before. A weird sensation crawls through my stomach at the thought of his actions but I try to push my dangerous thoughts away, overthinking everything he does never seems to leave me mentally well.
My hand pulls him by his side and he comes closer, leaning his head into the side of my neck before placing a lingering and wet kiss on my skin. My eyes instinctually shut as he continues, slowly yet sloppily leaving wet kisses on my neck before pulling my top down by the sleeve slightly and leaving some on my collarbone. My eyes knit shut and I unconsciously forget everything around us. The people on the other side of the door, the harsh words we exchanged this morning and the other women he seems to mess around with continuously.
His head moves around the space between my neck and shoulder as his other hand that isn't babysitting my injured one roams my body, moving around and becoming familiar with it before finally landing on my hip. A small moan erupts from my lips when his mouth lands on a certain area of my neck that is sensitive and I feel my cheeks flush out of embarrassment. I prepare myself for his teasing but instead he places his attention on that area, my breathing becoming hectic and my thoughts clouded as he chews on my skin. My uninjured hand moves from his waist and lands on the top of his head before running through his hair and pulling at the ends. A groaning noise erupts from his very own lips and I continue, trying my best to hear the noise once again. His breathing becomes just as hectic and rattled as mine and he pulls away, catching his breath before stepping back, my mouth unintentionally letting out a light whine at the lost of contact. Fortunately he only pulls away for several seconds to remove his shirt before moving back and placing his hands on the small of my back and pushing me forward so I'm on the very edge and am as close to him as possible. My arms instinctively react and use my wrists to wrap themselves around his neck and pull him back in between my neck. He chuckles at my needy behavior but I completely disregard his teasing, my embarrassment from earlier gone and exchanged with a longing for his lips on my skin.
His mouth continues its assault as he trails his lips lower, reaching the top of my breasts and continuing to leave wet kisses. He nibbles on a top part of my breast and I moan, sure that if I were on my feet I would have become a puddle of mush by now. His touches, kisses and caresses are so simple yet they extract the most from me and make his every touch completely euphoric.
" Fuck, sweetheart." He groans as I run my hands through his hair and pull at the ends rougher than before. The fingertips on my injured hand roam his chest and his breathing accelerates, the amount of breaks he takes between nibbling on my neck increasing. His hand roams my body and moves up my shirt, landing on my bare waist and using his thumb to graze over the area just under my breast. My own breathing accelerates to an ever faster pace as he squeezes my sides, his kisses getting sloppier and rougher as he moves around my neck and the area where my cleavage would be if my breasts weren't so small.
" Jocelyn?" The sound of Derek knocking and talking comes from the door and my heart and body stop almost instantly as Alex continues. I pull my body away from him and he groans to which I react to by using my injured hand to cover over his mouth, a hissing noise coming from my lips at my idiotic reaction. " Jocelyn?" Derek questions again and Alex steps away, his lips swollen and red when they appear from behind my hand. " Are you in there?" He asks and I clear my throat before responding.
" Yeah." I say gazing at Alex and motioning for him to be quiet as I talk. " I'm just ya know, I'm-" I trail on trying to think of an excuse as to why I've been in here for so long. " I'm on my period ya know." I let out a fake groan before continuing my lie." I've got really bad cramps and I just need to-" I trail on but he responds quickly before I can even finish.
" Yeah, yeah it's ok." He says frantically and Alex rolls his eyes at the sound of Derek's voice and at the fact that he's being forced to be quiet. " I'll just- Ill just let you- ya know do what you gotta do." He says in an awkward tone and I mentally thank the fact that he's uncomfortable with something as simple and traditional as a period.
" Thanks." I say, hearing his steps begin before fading away and silencing again. I sigh in my spot before stepping off the counter and tidying my t-shirt. Alex gazes me at as I do so but continues to stay silent, simply watching me move around. " You can talk now." I joke and he rolls his eyes as I turn around and gaze at myself in the mirror, his body right behind mine. His hands land on my waist and I swat him away, an upset look instantly making its way onto his face.
" Why didn't you tell Derek to fuck off?" He asks and I roll my eyes as I fix my messy hair and gaze at the dark color on my neck that is slowly starting to develop into a hickey. " didn't you two part ways?" He asks and I bite my lip as I try to fix my hair in a way that makes the hickey unnoticeable.
" Not necessarily." I say to which he reacts to by huffing and rolling his eyes in his spot. I don't bother to pay attention as I finger the bandage on my hand, purposely trying to avoid conflict. " It's not like it's any of your business." I finally respond back, huffing as well. Clearly failing at trying to avoid any conflict. He rolls his eyes and scoffs, avoiding the response and staying silent. I don't respond either and reach for the first aid kit, pulling out a bandage and putting it on my hickey as he watches. He laughs from behind me and I give him a dirty glare through the mirror for a second before looking away and gazing back at my excuse of a coverup.
" It's really not any of my business-." He responds as I adjust my hair around the bandage. " I guess I just didn't picture you to be that type." He shrugs, pursing his lips and gazing down at his own feet. My curiosity nags against me and I turn around, ready to approach him and his response.
" What type?" I ask, slightly offended by what he said although I'm not even sure what type he's referring to. For all I know he could be talking about the angelic type, yet again he would be saying he never pictured me to be that type. But knowing Alex I'm sure that his words aren't meant to cause any good.
" You know." He asks crossing his arms over his chest and looking back down at his feet.
" The type that sleeps around a load ." He shrugs and I huff, crossing my own arms over my chest. What's his problem?
" Why would you think that?" I say, raising an eyebrow at him and being instantly offended. He shrugs his shoulders and I roll my eyes, turning around and adjusting my hair to try to calm down my agitated behavior. I'm a women and I am a human as well. I have basic human needs and I'm old enough. I shouldn't have to deal with people underestimating my number of sexual encounters. "And like I said, it's really none of your business." I bite back in a cold tone. He lifts his hands in surrender and bites down on his lip, clearly trying to hold back a smile or laugh. He's amused by my upset reaction and I can't help but be bothered again. He is such a sick prick, that gets off on the misfortune and annoyance of others.
My body returns from its trance like state and I feel a sting of regret pierce through me. How could I let myself be seduced by this horrible man that has no respect for me or anyone else? I sigh in my spot and try to clear my head when the thought of my uncle slick's disappointment rings through my head. I already feel guilty enough.
" but when you think about it sweetheart, it is my business isn't it?" He randomly blurts in a deep and slow tone from behind me as he presses his hard front against my back and wraps his arms around my waist. I look at him from the mirror as he returns his lips to my neck and begins his assault once again. I huff in my spot and pull myself away, turning to look at him with a disgusted look. My uncle's words for once allowing me to control my own body against Alex and his hypnotizing ways.
" Well then in that case I'll need a list of the people you've slept with in the last month-" I say, my arms crossed over my chest. He rolls his eyes and moves away, running his hands through his hair and clearly being unamused with my hint of sarcasm. I'm not actually planning on doing this with him again and neither am I ever planning on sleeping with him. That would be completely detrimental to everything I stand for and everything that I've built for myself since I stopped doing what I use to do. I just want to push him away and make sure he doesn't try me again. Although a part of me feels that it won't be enough to keep us from lusting after each other. " Oh and I'll also need a test just to make sure." I say my arms crossed over my chest and a fake smile on my face. He turns back to look at me and rolls his eyes, his unamusement very clear. I roll mine as well and turn around, reaching for the first aid kit and putting it away before gazing back at the mirror and adjusting my coverup. Alex moves to stand behind me and watches me through the mirror, my eyes reverting to look at him every once in a while as he stares at me with an unreadable expression. " I'm- ." I say turning around, finally getting over my guilt and anger enough to notice that he still hasn't put his shirt back on. My eyes scan his bare chest and I clear my throat before looking back up to find a smirk already pulling at his lips. " I'm gonna go." I say, looking at him for half a second before looking around the room, already not being able to gaze at him directly like I did minutes ago. He nods his head and I make my way towards the door, turning around to speak again before I open the door.
" Just wait a couple minutes before you come out." I tell him but he rolls his eyes, acting annoyed yet still nodding his head at my request. Shortly after I open the door, shutting the light off behind me to create the effect that it's empty.
" Jocelyn." Derek calls after me as I make my way through the backstage area, by now more than fifty feet away from the bathroom. " How you doing babe?" He asks before leaning forward and trying to kiss my lips. I quickly move my head to the side and adjust myself so he can kiss my cheek, something he preceeds to do seconds later, very awkwardly if I may add. " I heard about everything with Christo." He informs me gazing down at my injured hand and bandaged neck but not bothering to ask or mention anything about it. " Do you know what went wrong with him?" He asks and I shake my head and lie, being sure that the information I know is something I don't want to disclose with him. He doesn't deserve to know. He's the asshole that caused it and hurt all of us. If Im being honest I'm not upset with the fact that he had been sleeping with Lauren while he's been going after me, it's really none of my business, I'm just upset with all the harm he's done outside of just that. He threatened Shay, ruining our friendship and her relationship and on top of that he purposely played with me to get back at Alex and shows absolutely no remorse.
" I just think he was having a bad day." I tell him and he nods slowly, obviously not completely believing what I'm saying.
" We should finish up the sound checks then."
A/N: so yeah that happened