"He was willing face a life without me than to have me choose a life I would not choose for myself."
― John Scalzi, The Sagan Diary
She ran to the school with her ashen hair being carried by the wind, together with her threatening to fall nude cardigan but she didn't mind- the only thing occupying her brain was Kevin. Her converse screeched through the smooth school hallway with one or two instances threatening the grey eyed girl loose her balance but she kept on going- for him she kept on going.
When she arrived at the entrance to the gym, it was locked by a large, yellow bicycle lock and her eyes widened as the sudden realization hit her. This was what Kevin was planning this for days. Sophie panicked and immediately looked at another entrance, only to find all of them locked.
"Fuck." She cursed out loud, leaving Sophie to bang against the doors and plead. "Kevin let me in! Kevin!"
She breathed for a second, at this time of hour there were only a few people around the school so she had a little more time to get to Kevin before people realized that something was wrong. As she tried to clear her mind, Sophie remembered something. It was a ventilation shaft located at the third floor which led directly to the gym. It was behind the bleachers and Sophie would often use the pathway to escape gym classes and go hit up a joint, at this she started to run as fast as her feet could carry her- in worry that she won't get to Kevin in time.
---
Arriving at the gym, it was like she entered a bloody massacre that she would only see in television shows. She looked at the bodies, slowly counting how many her boyfriend had killed and that was when she realized that most of the corpses were of Mindy and her friends. It was his revenge plot, out of the fact that they had hurt her.
The realization almost made Sophie cry- out of happiness or fear she had yet to realize. Kevin did all of this for her, because he fucking loved her too much to let anybody else hurt her. The other people who were killed were just collateral damage so that he could attain his goal and as he stood there in front of the river of blood- she fucking loved him more.
His image would forever be ingrained in her mind, that despite of the fact that he should have been bloodied by now, he wasn't. He wore clean clothes and was only decorated with a sheen of sweat along with his bow and a bag of arrows behind his back.
"So this is what you've been planning all along?" She asked, the two of them on opposite sides of the gym the only thing separating them were the corpses and a river of blood. Slowly she went around the disastrous aftermath, knowing how hard it is to remove blood from clothes. Once she reached him, Sophie hugged his boyfriend- now turned murderer- from behind. "You fucking psychopath. How could you do all of this for me?"
"I love you." He muttered weakly, then turned around to face her- his hands cupping her tear stained face. "Tell me that you're pleased." She nodded weakly as Kevin wiped away the tears that were dripping from her eyes.
He did all of this for her, out of the fact that he would never let anyone hurt her without receiving a painful punishment. That thought itself, was still being processed in her mind. This teenage boy, this psychotic teenage boy would be the death of her and she loved him- wholeheartedly so but as she heard sirens blaring from the distance she knew. They both knew that it was for him and they both knew that they would be separated for the first time since they met.
"I don't want to leave you." She muttered weakly and Kevin could only rest his chin atop her head. "We could leave right now, through the vents. We'll run away. Please Kevin. Please." She pleaded, but he only shook his head lightly.
"Some of them will survive and know it's me." He pointed at the bodies. "Besides, the arrows, the locks- everything actually would be traced back to me. I'm not that very good at such a thorough planning you know."
She cried out harder this time and tightened his hold on him, not ever wanting to let Kevin go. "My parents are getting a divorce." He muttered in a barely audible whisper, making Sophie look at him. "Is that why?"
His free hand went to tangle itself in her tresses and then stroked through her ashen locks lovingly. "Partly, had to get away from them for a bit. But it's all for you- it was always for you."
She slapped him at that. "You fucking idiot, you could have professed your love for me in a much more discreet way now look at what's happening- they will take you away from me. But I can join you- I can join you in prison if you want just say the word and it's off to prison forever for the both of us."
He could only shake his head, leaving Sophie to give him a look of distress. "I don't want you to suffer with me. Promise me something?"
Kevin asked her once again and as always she nodded. "Lie. Lie like hell, so you don't end up in prison. Leave me to suffer and tell them that I forced you to be my friend, that I forced you to be with me, that you hate me with every fiber of your being." She only whimpered as Kevin closed his eyes and kissed her forehead one last time. "I love you."
"I love you too." She muttered and then in that moment she knew, there was no more Sophie and Kevin or Kevin and Sophie. They would have to pretend that there never was something between them. Painfully she left him behind, leaving the same way she came but not before glancing at him one last time and that was it- the end of his chapter in her book.
She went home that day, her own home. Her mother was once again passed out on the couch, but instead of cleaning up after the older woman- the grey eyed for went upstairs and cried for the first time ever since her father died.
How were they supposed to be in hell together, when the bars of prison would separate them? She longed to be in his arms once again and Sophie wanted to hear his voice saying that it would be okay, but it wouldn't be- nothing would ever be okay again not without him.
---
When the news broke out of what Kevin did, everyday was living hell for Sophie. It wasn't out of the disgusted looks given to her by her schoolmates or the rumors that spread around town about her- it was the fact that Kevin wasn't there and the grey eyed girl was completely out of sorts because she could see him everywhere.
Until the fateful day came for Kevin's final day of judgement. His prison sentence for all eternity was certainly a very visible conclusion to his path, but the final nail needed would be Sophie's witness confession and as he ordered she lied.
Up at the confession pedestal, she was under an oath to tell the truth but she couldn't care less because Kevin's words were always final and as she sat there all eyes were on her. She need not to act distraught because she already was, Sophie only hesitated since the stares of everyone was enough to make her cringe. Her grey eyes wandered across the room and finally settled on Kevin who wore an orange prison jumpsuit and cuffs that bundled his hands. He looked the same and he still had the black, long locks she clearly adored but she could see the circles under his eyes and the sight of him make her heart lurch.
She was about to open her mouth, when she noticed Kevin mouth discreetly to her. 'Lie.' At this she breathed in deeply and prepared to act and pretend to be something she was not.
"Kevin Khatchadourian is seen as my boyfriend of sorts, but I never did willingly allowed myself to be in his presence. He threatened me a handful of times- that if I were to ever leave him, he would slit my throat without hesitation." She muttered out weakly and whimpered towards the end. Her eyes glazed over, then a few second later tears were dripping from her eyes. "I can't even start telling you of the things he did to me, but fuck- that psychopathic lunatic deserves to be put behind bars." She stated and started to simply cry in the stands, in fear that she may suddenly say something that would be against Kevin's wishes. After a few more seconds, someone escorted her to another seat by the audience - the people beside her starting to comfort the crying mess of a girl.
But she didn't want their soothing coos, she wanted Kevin's- she wanted him back. And at that exact moment she realized how good of an actress she was. The grey eyed girl looked distraught as the minutes ticked by and when his sentence was announced, she played the part of an innocent victim. When it was over she was the first one out of the court rooms and the ashen haired girl was already putting on her shades and fedora hat when someone abruptly grabbed her.
"Why did you lie?" It was Mrs. K and the two of them were alone in the silent hallways. She couldn't find her voice to tell her why and frankly Sophie just wanted to go home and cry herself to sleep once again. "Where was the girl who was head over heels over my son? Who told me that she would never leave this side? Where the fuck is she? Why are you throwing him under the bus? Tell me?"
This time Kevin's mother grabbed both her arms and shook Sophie in a much more harsh manner. Despite of the fact, that yes her son was a psychopath, there was still a part of Eva that wanted him in the safety of her home. Honestly, she knew that it was because of her. Eva's poor upbringing of Kevin, may as well be the reason to why so many bodies were slain by her son but what angered her was the fact that Sophie wasn't willing to defend him, even by the slightest bit.
"I saved Celia and Mr. K." That was the only statement the ashen haired girl could mutter out and Eva paused at what she heard. "Kevin was going to kill them, but I stopped him. I'm the reason you still have a family, so you better be grateful enough to tell people I'm lying."
Eva's hold on the grey eyed girl loosened and both her shoulders sagged at the sudden revelation. Sophie put the glasses on her perfectly pale skin, then said in a solemn matter. "Besides this is what he wanted. Kevin was the one who told me to lie and make sure I don't end up with him in prison."
With that the grey eyed girl turned to head for the exit, her ashen locks bouncing behind her as she walked. Before completely leaving Kevin's mother, she turned back one more time to say. "This is probably goodbye Mrs. K"
---
Therapy, she was ordered to be a regular attendee to a local therapist because people were worried that Sophie attained a form of trauma because she was around Kevin too long- in other words people were afraid that she would end up just like him. She wasn't surprised about this fact and the grey eyed girl was recommended, forced, to attend Dr. Samantha Green's therapeutic center.
The moment Sophie entered her office she knew that she would hate Dr. Green and she did. The woman was a young and excellent doctor at the ripe age of thirty two and honestly any normal person would say that she was great at her profession, but Sophie hated the fact that the woman was happy and constantly smiling. Since the ashen haired often sulked after Kevin's imprisonment, she loathed being around joyful people and Sophie's psychotic tendency just wanted to wipe that smile of her face.
Dr. Green said that she had anger issues and she would easily have outbursts whenever someone would push her off her limits- a fact which Sophie already knew. In the professional's interpretation however, it stemmed from the fact that she was angry toward Kevin and everything that he did for her.
It was far from the truth actually, but Sophie played the part of an innocent victim perfectly that Dr. Green believed her- she even believed her own self sometimes. And once a week she would lie down on that couch telling the female doctor of all her illusionary troubles and woes. This would go on until she acquired a good control over her anger management and for all Sophie knew this could be a weekly routine for her until the rest of her life.
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