Does my story on private or what ? (o.O) I've been updating but no one read it and no vote like usual ? =< aww this makes me sad :( btw enjoy ....
Saturday ( 03 / 09 )
2 week after the truth .
Harry Pov
I stared at Louis who is still sleeping beside me . I asked him to do the treatment but he don't want to stay at hospital because that will make him can't do anything to make him happy when he stuck at the hospital . The reason was understandable so I didn't force him . I know I should let him go someday .
I asked the doctor , is there anything that I must be aware at and he told me that there is only a few things Louis life will change . Such as his vision will be doubled and will be hard to take things in front him . I saw him the other day , he want to take his phone at the table but he keep missed to do so . So , I helped him to get his phone . He smiled grateful for me to help him . It's not a problem anyway .
Then , the doctor also told me , if Louis showed any sign about the pain in his head , give him painkillers and help him to stay calm . The pain will go as soon as the pill kick in cause the doctor already prescribed the pill just for any patients like Louis .
Then , this is the thing I'm worries the most. It was short term memory loss . He will forget who I am and remember the past but the doctor told me that it won't take too long for him to remember something that he forgotten , so I shouldn't be worry , and that thing happens when he has 3 month left .... which is now. But by now , he didn't show any sign of those so I might as well get ready for it
I asked the doctor , what make him to have this terminal illness and the doctor told me that , it was by something that hit his head too hard . And I don't recall when Louis hit his head on something but doctor told me that it was from the accident .
But it was a long time ago , and the doctor told me , it can happen when his brain injury haven't been treated so that is what happens . The incident happen on November which is last year , and he got to know his cancer on April . It's doesn't makes sense . After 6 month of the incident, he got this cancer .
" harry ? " I heard Louis asked me weakly . " what are you doing here ? Aren't you supposed to edit your documentary ? " he asked while rubbing his eyes . Yep . It is now he started to forget thing .
" love , I already pass up the documentary to teacher last week , silly ! " I said chuckling . He frowns and said " am I supposed to know ? " I smiled at him and shook my head " no you don't . Get up and go take shower. I will cook something for breakfast for us ." I said simply and kiss his forehead. He nods and I stood up and go out . I already showered , so I can cook something to eat .
I open the refrigerator, and there is literally nothing in it . Yeah , I forgot to do groceries shopping . So I go back to my room , and change my outfit . Grey hoodie and black skinny jeans. I fix my hair and try tied them but its hard to do so . Louis get out of the bathroom with a towel around his waist. " where are you going ? " he asked while looking up and down over my outfit.
" we are going to eat outside cause there is literally nothing to cook so after we eat , we will go buy groceries. Wear something nice then ! " I told him . He nods and I still fix my hair . Grrr messy hair day . I heard Louis chuckle behind me and I pout .
" hey don't laugh at me ! " I exclaim and let my long curl cover my face . I feel Louis pull me towards the bed and sat me down . He then goes behind me and grip my hair . " woah, your hair soo long hazza, but it soft too ! " he chuckle again. " I'm thinking to donate my hair to the children who needing it. What do you think Louis ? Should I cut my hair now or I should wait till its long enough for a girl ? " I asked his opinion.
He already tied my hair like a buns. " I don't know. But I'd like you keep your hair . You look cute with it ! " he said when he get down of the bed and search for his jeans. He already wear grey jumper . Grey couple . Tehee.
" why are you smiling like that ?" He asked when seeing my face . " both of us wear grey today . Grey couple ! " I chuckle. He look at me with fond and said " you're really something hazza ! '' I laugh and said " well , I'm your fiancee so you should accept who I am " I said proudly . " how do you know I'm planning to propose you ? " he asked me confused.
" you already did love . Look . It's 2 week ago. I have the vide- hey . What's wrong ? " I asked worried at his facial expression. He looks sad. " did I forget about it again , hazza? " he said sadly while looking down ..I go to him and lift his chin " doesn't matter if you forgot about it cause I will always remind you . Okay love . Let's go " I said to him and kiss his lips . Then I pull his hand toward the car . We locked the door for our safety .
Louis was quite the whole ride . Maybe he was thinking . So , I played the music on to make him cheered up a bit . It's turn out good . He was singing along slowly and I smiled at him . We arrived at the mall and I search for parking lot . It's weekend so it's kinda hard to find one .
" hazza, there ! '' Louis said as he saw a car moving out . I quickly drive there cause don't want anyone to steal it . When I park it nicely , I cut the engine and get out of the car with Louis following me. Once both of us out , I held his hand and he happily took it . We go inside the mall and searching place to eat .
" are you up for burger ? " I asked him when stopped in front burger king . He smiled and nods
We got inside and sat on the empty table . Then I got up and asked Louis " what do you want ? " , he frowns while getting up . "Can I follow you ? " he plead and I smiled and pulled him into a short line to order . Louis stand beside me while his eyes roaming toward the menu .
" I'm starving ! It's been ages we didn't go here ! Errr, am I right or am I wrong ? " he frowns while looking at me. " you're right honey . It's been ages . So , have you decides what to eat yet ? " I asked with a smile and touch his button nose. He looks back at the wall hanging menus and grin.
" everything seem yummy . " Louis said with a chuckle . I look at the menu and since it morning , they served breakfast food . Louis right , everything seem yummy . " I already decides . I want egg-normous burrito , hash browns and pancakes and sausage platter . I don't like coffee , so do you think they sell Fanta in this such hour ? " he asked with his mouth twitch .
" are you really going to eat all of your orders ? " I asked him , ignoring his question because after this customer, it's our turn to order . " yup , I'm sure . But , you should eat some of those too so yo- " " alright then . I will just order french toast sticks then. For drink , we should ask them that ! " I said with a grin and he cheekily grin back .
" uh excuse me sir ! You ready order ? " this voice sound so familiar. I looked and a gasp out of my mouth but covered it with a gulp , we walk in front a bit " oh yea . What do you want love " I asked Louis while turning to him . He looked confused at first but shrugged it off ." The breakfast food are still available ? " Louis asked Zayn who is looking nervous . " yes . It is sir " he said shakily " aww. Don't be scared love . We won't bite you , you know ? " Louis said , chuckling . But stopped when behind us groan . Louis cough and I glare behind us . Have some respects towards my fiance, you idiot ! I said it in my thoughts, don't want to said it out loud cause don't want to cause any scene .
" We want egg-normous burrito , hash browns , pancakes and sausage platter and french toast sticks . Urm . For drink , are the gassy drink available? " Louis asked him again . " wait . Casey! Do we have to open the gassy drink ? Yes ? Okay . Yes we have. What would you like ? " Zayn asked Louis without meeting my eyes . " my fiance wants Fanta . Strawberry ones. Am I right ? " I said smirking at Zayn when his eyes widen .
" yup . And my hazza here , want Fanta Oranges . " Louis said with smiles on his face. I smiled at him too and Zayn said " s-sure . That would be 30.90 . " I hand him the money and he took it shakily . I don't know why , but I'm enjoying seeing him like this. He gave me 4.10 for the changes and said " wait beside this please " his eyes are fixed to the next customers. We waited beside and when our food done , we search for empty seat and sit.
" hazza , why the cashier seem afraid of you ? " Louis asked when we sit across each other .
" we used to be friend and I have a crush on him but I'm over it cause he left and never tell me why . Eh . He did. But doesn't make sense . Eh ? I don't remember what reason but ah just forget it . " I murmurs while taking my toast and eat them plain .
" what would you do then when he told you the reason truthfully and apologies sincerely? " Louis asked while picking at his food . I frowned and said " I will just forgave him then " he looks up curiously " just that ? Don't you like thinking to be friend with him again and maybe he will be my replacement when I'm gone .... " he said sadly and slowly. I clinched my fist and look at him angrily " no one can replace you Louis ! And don't ever thinks of that way . I'm your fiance for God's sake! " I snap at him .
His eyes widen at my sudden burst . I got up and walk to the direction of the toilet .
I punch the door as I get in the toilet then shut the door roughly . My angry tears start to fall down and punch the mirror of the toilet . The mirror broke and the glass split and fall down to the sink. I looked at my swollen hand with blood on my knuckles and some glass were in it . It's doesn't hurt , what's hurt the most was my broken heart .
I know I shouldn't react that way but it's just hard to accept the fact that I will be with someone else beside Louis . I don't want someone else, I just want Louis . My Louis . " oh my god !!! Hazza , you idiot !!! '' I turned around and saw Louis worries face . I shrugged him off and look down.
My tears haven't stopped and I wiped them off with my sleeve. Louis took my another hand which is now bloody and then he turn the water and put my hand on the water. I let out whimper as the water hit on my knuckles " it's okay haz, '' Louis said softly but shakily .
He turn off the water and took the toilet paper . Then he wipes it in on my knuckles . I hissed and he sigh while pressing it softly. " I know what I said was wrong but you promised me harry ! You promised to move on . Don't think that I don't remember that because I do remember ! " he snap and throw the tissues away and walk out of the toilet .
I go out of the toilet , the minute Louis left . I go back to the restaurant only seeing Louis waited at the end of the counter . He smiled when the cash- zayn gave him the plastic of our food and he smiled back . Louis walked out and slowing down as he sees me . " We are going home. You can buy groceries later or asked niall or Liam for help . " he said simply and walk away without waiting me.
I walked behind him till to our car. I unlock the car and Louis get in as soon as I opened the door. I get inside and start to drive . We said nothing when we are on our way to our home .
I know I promised him that but it's too early to do that . Instead of turning to the corner of our house , I drive to the nearest park .
" where are we going? " Louis asked when he look around . " park " I said simply . I stopped the car to the parking lot that's empty. Well , it's noon after all . I go out and walk to the nearest bench and sit on it without waiting for Louis .
Louis then sit besides me , " why are we here ? " he asked curiously. " just to relax our mind . " I said slowly . Louis sigh and took my broken knuckles and rub it softly. " I'm sorry. I know it's too early to move on but can you at least try ? It's okay if you don't want zayn but - " " why don't you just take care of yourself and don't bother with my life . This is my life and I have the right what to feel and what to do " I snap at him while yanking my hands away from him .
" I know harry , I know . This is your life and I don't want you to be messed because of me . I want you to be happy and - " " who the fvck being soo happy after their important person leave them ? Tell me , who Louis , who ??" I yelled at him and stood up from my sit .
" obviously nobody harry. Nobody . I know I shouldn't have proposed you when I - " " now you regret propose me ? Wow Louis wow ! " I cut his word while crying and lean my body to the nearest tree , needing to leave a couple of space between us .
" that's not what I mean harry ! For gods sake, let me finish my talking ! First , I'm not regret to propose you . But I feel like I'm selfish because I know I will died soon but I still wants to see us to get married. Inviting closed friend and family to our wedding . Dancing with romantic song while people surrounded us . Kissing you in front of everyone to let them know that you're mine . But I know it's not going to happen because of my stupid terminal cancer ! " he yelled shakily and my fresh new tear start to fall .
He planning to marry me . Our wedding . I didn't know he feel that way . . " so that's why I tried to break up with you but you make me harder to break up with you so I make you promised that. I know it's pathetic to do so but I have to. I don't want you to kill yourself, and kill your happiness because of me harry . I don't want you to be an old man that still single and live by himself . I want you to find someone who obviously can take care of you , be with you from start till the end and make you happy with your new family . " he said sadly .
" harry ? Please say something ! " he pleads while I heard him walking toward me . " I don't know what to say Louis . We need each other right now . So , can we start the day without fighting please . I know I started the fight but I promise you I won't start the fights again but you also promise me that . Can we ? " I said as I took his hand and intertwined our finger. He nods with a smile and he lean forward and kiss me. It's slow and full of emotion but it's good .
" alright. We will start over. Let me get our food and eat here. I'm kind of starving but the foo- " " you're rambling . Just go hedgehog ! " I cuts his word with chuckle . He grins and start to walk to my car . I wipe my tears away and sat on the bench while waiting for Louis . What Louis have said was half right . I don't want to be single an old man but I don't want anyone else besides of him . He's my only happiness. He's my sunshine and if he gone , I will be living in the darkest.
He arrived with a plastic bag and set it on our lap as we sat close to each other . We open the plastic and the food already cold. " well , it's not the best food to eat but whatever , I'm hungry " he said as he shoved his burrito into his mouth . I look at him , amused by his action . He look at me weirdly and said with a mouth full " whoy youuy loook at meh? " I chuckle and shook my head .
" urm hazza? '' he said slowly when he already swallow his food . I take a bite of pancakes and I raised my eyebrows while looking at him . " I know we done talking but . . can we . . nah its okay . Just eat yeah " he said nervously and start to eating his food . I shrugged it off and we eat in silence.
It's short , I know . So bye . Thanks for reading. Lots of love -Az-