13. Past Between Us
"Past is a place of reference, not a place of residence."
•°•°•
We sat there for a while, not talking. Just staring at the sea before us.
Darren and Sam were back and were playing in the water. Claire was learning how to surf. Jake was teaching her. They looked cute together. Josh and Tyler were also surfing.
"Aren't you going in the water?" Brian asked me a few minutes later.
"Not now." I said. We had finished our coconut water and now the coconuts were resting between us.
He nodded and got up, dusting off sand on his jeans. Was he going?
"Want to take a walk along the beach?" He asked and extended his hand for me to take.
I took his hand as he helped me up. His warm hand sent tingles down my spine which I tried to ignore.
We started walking along the beach. Not many people were there. This beach was never crowded. Though it was a beautiful beach with a beautiful view of the sea, it still remained mostly deserted.
"What happened, Brooke?" Brian asked, his face turned in my direction.
"What?"
"You are so quite today. Is something bothering you?"
"No," I said.
"You don't know how to lie. So stop trying," He said with a smile.
"I said it's nothing," I said, hoping he wouldn't question further. He didn't answer me and we continued walking.
"Brooke, please tell me," he insisted. Why does he never listen to me?
"Desperate to know, are we?"
He shrugged, "I'm just curious."
"Why do you want to know?" What was he going to do about it? He can't make things right.
He shrugged again, "Got nothing else to do. What are you upset about?"
"I am not upset. What were you saying that night about your mom?" I asked. If he could question me on things I don't want to talk about, then I definitely can do the same to him too.
He raised his eyebrows at me. "I didn't ask you a personal question."
"But the answer is personal."
"You want to talk about it?"
"You want to tell me about your mom?"
He sighed, "Brooke."
"Brian," I said in the same tone in which he had said my name.
"I can't."
"Exactly. I can't," I replied smartly.
He didn't say anything.
"Don't you trust me?" He asked after a while.
"Nope. Not after you broke into my house even after I told you not to."
He smirked.
"But it was you who inv-"
"Don't say it was me who asked you to come. Both of us know that you came even after I told you not to."
"Okay. I came without you telling me to. What's the big deal?"
"Brian, are you serious? Do you just go to anybody's house in the middle of the night for nothing? Tell me, why did you come? What did you want?!" I raised my voice when I asked the last question.
"Whoa. Don't shout at me. I just thought it would be fun to scare you," He said, raising his hands up in the air in surrender.
"Well, mission failed. I was not one bit scared," I said, sticking my tongue out at him.
"It doesn't matter. Or should I have another try?"
I glared at him which gave him his answer.
"I guess not," He said and started walking. I hadn't realised that we had stopped walking. I walked a few steps behind him.
A while later, I caught up with him.
"Look. I'm sorry. I'm just really...upset. Okay. I admit it, I am upset."
"It's okay. I was being stupid. If you didn't want to talk about something, I should have understood. I'm sorry too." I smiled at him. No matter how infuriating Brian might be, he was understanding and liked that about him.
"It's not your fault." I assured him.
We had reached quite far away from our group. They were still visible to us. And they hadn't stopped what they were doing before.
A comfortable silence settled between us. I looked at the sand below, imagining shapes in it that weren't there.
Brian chose to broke the silence. "I hate to be nosy, but I am going to try one last time. Do you want to tell me why you are upset?"
I frowned at the sand. The tiny, almost the size of an ant likeness I had for him vanished into thin air.
I took a deep breath. Man, why couldn't he listen to me?
"Can I trust you?" I asked, looking up at him through the glare of the afternoon sun.
"Of course," He said immediately.
"Promise me you won't tell anyone," I almost whispered.
"I promise, Brooke. You can trust me," He said and something in his eyes told that I could indeed trust him.
I smiled at him, "Let's sit and talk. It's a long story."
He nodded. I sat on the warm sand, bringing my legs to my chest. I took a quick glance at my watch.
It was almost five.
"Let me first tell you about my family. I have a brother, Ryan. And I had a sister...but she's no more."
"Oh my God, I'm so sorry," Brian said immediately, interrupting my story.
"It's okay. Don't interrupt me again."
"Um...okay."
"My mom is Rita Parker and my dad was James. I was the eldest of my family. Ryan is a year younger to me and...Tiffany, my little sister was five years younger to me. Ours was a really happy family. We loved each other so much," Brian nodded and smiled.
"They still do," Brian interrupted once again but I didn't say anything.
I smiled back, "My dad. He was into business. Actually my granddad had started the business and he continued it. He also had a younger brother. My dad being the eldest, my grandfather gave the company's responsibility to my dad and he was running the company successfully. Along the way, he made many enemies. Some of them, we knew. Some of them were hidden behind masks of fake love and admiration for my dad." I said, shaking my head, remembering the betrayal of one of our own family members.
"My uncle wanted the company to be in his name. According to him, he was relegated in the company. But my grandad handed it to my dad, because well he's older than my uncle and more experienced in business stuff. Problems cropped up between my dad and uncle. They weren't exactly on the same page when it came to taking decisions. My uncle was a bit hot headed and didn't like it when my grandfather supported my dad in most of the decisions. My uncle started to live alone. Away from us. And he didn't talk to us much. At the company, he ignored my dad, didn't show up for family gatherings or vacations or even Christmas. Being a little girl, I didn't see what he was doing to our family. In fact, I liked him. He used to be the only person I played with when I was young."
"During these problems, my mom 'fell out of love' with my dad. But he loved her deeply. I had never seen a person love another the way my dad loved my mom. She wanted a divorce. She said she loved him but she didn't want to be in a relationship with him. At that time, I was eight years old. Ryan was seven and Tiffany was just three. He loved her and so he was strong enough to let her go. I don't hate her for this though. She had the right to do whatever she wanted." I didn't exactly supported the divorce but I had no say in it. It was between my dad and mom. And when she wanted a divorce, I didn't have any bitter feelings towards her.
"After their divorce, the company started to fail. My grandfather died a year after my parent's divorce. Uncle didn't even show up at the funeral. After that, my dad was completely shattered. I was living at my mom's place along with Tiffany and Ryan."
"Then one day, at the company, my dad and uncle got into a huge fight and he...he hit my dad. My dad threw him out of the company. And then we never saw him again. My mom knew about it and she felt bad for my dad."
I sighed. I didn't think I could tell the rest. That was the most gory part of my past. I couldn't believe I was telling this to my, I think, friend who I know for a little above two weeks. I was stupid, I know.
"It was Christmas night," I started. Okay I could do this. It happened years ago. Crying over it would look pathetic. "We were all at my mom's place for dinner. Even my dad. It was just me, Ryan, Tiffany, my mom and dad. Once again like a happy family. After dinner, my dad and Tiffany left for dad's place. Tiffany was really insisting on staying with dad and mom couldn't say no to her. They left..." I paused, swallowing hard as I forced the next words past my lips, "...but they never got home," I felt a hand squeezing my shoulder and a finger rubbing soothing circles on the back of my hand.
I looked at Brian. He had his left arm around me and his right hand was in my hand. I didn't notice that until he had squeezed my shoulder. His hand was warm. And I was a bit cold. It felt nice.
"Are you okay?" He whispered in my ear, making goosebumps rise on my arm.
I nodded.
"That night, we said our goodbyes to both of them and they left happily. After a few hours, past midnight I think, mom got a call. And then she began crying. I was woken up by her sobs. I could tell something really bad had happened. She was crying uncontrollably. Next thing I knew, I was attending my dad's and Tiffany's funeral."
Brian's fingers reached up to my eyes and brushed against it. That's when I realised that I had been crying. Realising this, I quickly brushed my tears away.
I had never cried since my father's death. I had cried when he and Tiff had died. And now I was crying. What was the use in shedding tears over something that happened nine years ago? I couldn't change what happened.
And I was still crying. How pathetic.
"Don't cry. It's okay," Brian said, wiping the tears that had escaped. "If you don't want to talk about it, it's fine. But don't cry."
"I want to," I said and wiped the last of my tears.
"After the funeral, there were police investigations. They thought it was murder. And they were right. My uncle along with some other enemies of my dad had murdered them. They even killed my little Tiffany. It seemed that Tiff had managed to survive the accident. But my uncle, he confessed he had raped her and then smashed a big, heavy rock right on her skull. She died instantly," I said, shaking uncontrollably at the memory, "After it was revealed that uncle had done that, he was arrested. And then he committed suicide in jail. After that I, Ryan and mom moved here eight years ago. Living in the same house which contained so many wonderful memories with them was excruciatingly painful for us. And since then I have been here. End of the story," I said and gave him a weak smile.
"I'm so sorry, Brooke. I'm so sorry about your dad and your little sister. I couldn't imagine my world without my mom and dad. And you...you...I'm so sorry."
"It's okay Brian."
"No it's not. I'm truly sorry."
"I said it's okay."
I thought about today. It was a nice day at the beach. And I had told Brian my past. Was it the right thing to do? Could I really trust him? Maybe I was being stupid by ranting about my past to a boy who I met a week and a half ago but I did trust him. I felt that he wouldn't break my trust. And that he'll also open up to me with time. Yes. He just needed more time. He needed to trust me too.
I rubbed my hands over my arms. It was was getting cold. I looked at my watch and it was almost seven in the evening. The sun was going to set any minute now and it was getting a bit dark. The others were probably worried about us.
"We must head back. They must be wondering where we are," I said and got up. I dusted my shorts off of any sand that may have stuck to it.
Brian got up too and we started walking in the opposite direction in which we came.
"But why did you think about this today. I mean, why today. Did something happen today?" He asked.
"Beach. My dad loved beaches. I mean he practically lived near a beach his whole life. He grew up beside it, his first date with my mom was on a beach, they had a beach side wedding and for honeymoon they visited Bondi beach of Australia too."
"Wow," He said and took my hand in his. "Quite of a beach man your dad was." I really liked holding his hand. He held it tightly. And it makes me feel protected. I looked down at our intertwined hands and smiled. I didn't know how contact became so normal for us. But it felt good. And I no longer despised him that much.
He started swinging our intertwined hands back and forth. It was quiet for a few minutes. I didn't know that we walked so far away from our group while talking.
"Brian," I hesitated. Would he tell me?
He looked down at me. "Will you tell me your story?"
He looked away but didn't say anything. Instead, he stopped swinging our hands.
"It's okay," I said.
I left his grasp and walked a few steps ahead.
I suddenly felt a hand grab mine. Brian spun me around and his arms snaked around my waist.
"Why do you want to know about my past?" He asked.
"Got nothing else to do," I said, using the same sentence he used on me this afternoon.
He smirked, "I will tell you. But I can't. Not now. Not today. Can you wait?"
I nodded, "Okay, I will wait. Now let's get to our friends," I turned around.
"What's the hurry?" He muttered behind me.
"What?" I asked as I turned back to face him.
But he already had water in his hands. He threw it at me.
"Brian!" I exclaimed as I felt the cold water slide down my chest. He threw some more water at me.
"Brian, stop!" But it was no use. The jerk didn't listen to me.
I bent down and cupped some water in my hand, splashing it at him too.
"Brooke!"
I laughed as he flinched at the cold water, almost falling down. But I didn't stop.
"Brooke! You're going to regret that," He threatened and before I knew, his arms were trapping me from behind. He lifted and spun me around.
I squealed. Once my feet touched the wet sand, I pushed him back.
Unfortunately, his hand was holding my one hand. And when I pushed him back, he fell down, bringing me down with him.
I shivered. The water was so cold. And I had no clothes to change into, I realised.
I quickly got up but Brian pulled me down again. I think I would get a cold or something. I was completely wet now. Brian was dying of laughter as he slowly got up too.
"Piss off!" I stormed towards Claire. She was sitting on one of the benches I had sat on this afternoon before Brian came and decided to ruin my peace.
As I neared her, she waggled her eyebrows suggestively at me. Oh no. She had probably seen the water fight and was now thinking it in a wrong way. I ignored the look she was giving me.
"Claire! You got any extra clothes?" I asked.
"Um...actually, I just got a pair of shorts. No shirt," She said before digging into her bag. She threw a pair of white denim shorts at me and I caught it.
"What about a shirt? Does any of the boys have an extra shirt?"
"I don't think so."
"I do. Here," Brian said behind me and when I turned around he threw his shirt at my head. I pulled the shirt into my hands.
My eyes happened to land on Darren. He wasn't looking at me. He was looking - no, glaring at someone behind me. I looked behind me to see it was Brian. Why was he glaring at Brian? I didn't know why, but these boys definitely don't get along with each other.
"I don't want yours," I said, throwing it back to him.
"We don't have any other shirt. Come on, Brooke I'm sure that shirt is not dirty," Sam said. "Or if you want, you can be shirtless. I don't mind," Sam winked at me and Brian elbowed him in the ribs to which he groaned.
I knew I had no choice. "Fine," I said, ripping the shirt out of Brian's hands and marching towards the restrooms.
I heard chuckles from behind me and it sounded like Brian. I ignored it.
I quickly changed into the shirt and shorts. When I got out, all had gathered from our group.
As I neared them, I heard Sam whine.
"I'm hungry. Let's eat and then go home," He said.
Brian sighed, "Okay. We'll eat."
"What's going on?" I asked.
"Sam wants to eat and then go home, whereas Darren wants to go home first."
"I'm hungry too. So let's eat first," I said. After lunch I hadn't eaten anything and my stomach had growled a few times.
"But I want to go home," Darren said, looking at me.
"We will. After dinner," I said.
"Yes!" Sam said and started walking towards the hotels. We all followed behind him.
"Wow. You look good in my shirt," Brian said and winked at me before continuing. "But not as good as I do in it," He said cockily.
I rolled my eyes at him. "It's so loose."
"It's fine. You look very good." He reassured me. "And now I'm hungry. Sammy wait up." He called over to Sam.
I chuckled as he walked ahead of me to catch up with Sam and Darren was now walking with me.
"Where were you the whole day?" Darren asked.
"I was with Brian."
"Why? What were you two doing?"
"Um...we took a walk on the beach."
"A walk for a couple of hours?" He asked.
"Yes," I don't know what his problem is, but he sounded very revolting of that idea.
"Claire. How was the day? Did you learn how to surf?" I asked, walking with her now, leaving Darren to trail behind us.
"It was so good. And I did learn how to surf! It was so exciting. Jake taught me," She said, looking at Jake who winked at her. She then went on about her surfing experiences.
~~~
It was way past nine o'clock and we had a two hour drive ahead of us. It was going to be a long drive.
We decided to leave immediately as Claire had got several missed calls from her mom and I had myself got a couple of messages and calls from Ryan and my mom.
We told them that we'd be back before midnight.
"Come on, Brooke. Get into the car," Darren called me.
No way was I going to go in his car. I was so sleepy and I didn't want my ears to burst with their loud and unpleasant hollering.
"No thanks. I'll be travelling with Brian, Claire and Jake."
"What? No. You are coming with me!"
"No."
He whined some more but I ignored him.
"Sam. Would you go with Darren?"
"Sure," He said.
Darren looked at Sam unhappily.
"What? Like i told you earlier, I don't bite, cupcake," Sam told Darren and we chuckled. Darren glared at him.
"Don't call me that."
I chuckled at his angry expression.
After sometime, we finally left the beach. Good thing it was Sunday tomorrow. I was going to spend the whole day in bed.
We all got into Brian's car. Brian was quite happy about me coming with him.
As soon as we sat inside the car, he turned the heat up. It was really cold. And I was just in shorts and his thin shirt.
Claire and Jake who were in the backseat of the car, were already dozing off. Claire had her head on Jake's shoulder. And Jake had Claire's hand in his. They looked so cute together.
"They look great," Brian said as if he read my mind. I nodded. He sat in the driver's seat and pulled out of the driveway.
Darren had already left with Sam, Tyler and Josh. And we too headed towards home.
~~~
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